by Xana Jordan
Sitting down at the bar, I check through my messages while I eat lunch. There are a few messages from Stacy and Cade, but nothing else from Xana. I thought for sure she would have tried to call me again last night, or this morning at the very least. Maybe she slept in like I did. Stacy wants to know if I’ve talked to Xana because she can’t get her to answer her phone, and Cade wants to know if I want to come over and play pool this afternoon. I reply to Cade that I’ll be over in an hour, and send a text to Stacy that I haven’t talked to Xana since Friday.
Thinking about yesterday, I realize I am still mad about those pictures. I know they say they are nothing but friends, but I can’t stand him being close to her like that. I know I should call her and hear what she has to say about yesterday, but I’m still too mad to do that right now.
Finished with my lunch, I put away my dishes and make my way to the living room to watch some television before heading over to Cade’s. As I’m flipping through the channels, I try and call Xana. It rings forever before finally going to voicemail. I leave her a brief message to call me, and then I send her a text message. Sometimes she doesn’t listen to the messages, but will read a text.
ME: Hey, Xana. I’ve tried to call you. What are you doing today?
I am only paying attention to half of the game I found, so I decide to head on over to Cade’s house.
Cade and I are on our third game of pool when Stacy calls me. She’s wondering if I’ve talked to Xana yet. Apparently she’s been texting and calling her but Xana has yet to respond. That’s odd for Xan. She will at least answer a text.
“No, I haven’t talked to Xana since Friday. I texted her when I woke up today, but she hasn’t called me or anything. I just figured she was with her parents or something,” I tell her, hoping this calms her down.
“Why have you not talked to Xana since Friday? Didn’t she call you last night,” Stacy almost yells at me. Stacy cuts me off before I can answer her. “The last time I heard from Xana was last night after she got home. She was looking for you, and now she’s not answering her phone. That’s not like her to not answer me.” Stacy lets out a frustrated sigh and continues on, “Have you called her?”
“I sent her a text and left her a voicemail. She never called me last night. She probably fell asleep.” She’s probably trying to avoid me after she had so much fun with Blain.
“Maybe, I’ll try to call her again, but if she calls you tell her she had better call me before I kick her butt.” I laugh a little at Stacy’s threat. I’d hate to have her mad at me.
“Yeah, sure.” We say our goodbyes and I hang up. Cade is standing in front of me, leaning on the pool cue resting under his chin. He is frowning at me, and he doesn’t look happy.
“You haven’t talked to her since Friday? I thought you called her yesterday after the game.” Cade cocks his head to the side, as he waits for my response.
“No, I didn’t. She was too busy with Jaxson and Blain,” I tell Cade, not able to look him in the eye.
“What the hell are you talking about, Noel? Xana always wants to know about your games. You aren’t making any sense.” Cade places the pool stick on the table and crosses his arms, turning to stare at me.
Looking through the window of the game room, I pause for a moment before answering him. I’m not really sure if I want to talk about this right now. I’m still upset, and rather confused about what I should do.
“Look, I really don’t want to talk about it right now, okay? I’m going to go ahead and go. I told Mom I’d be home before dinner. I have some homework I need to get done before tomorrow. I’ll call you later, okay?” Cade and I walk to the living room so I can put my shoes back on.
“I’ll drop it for now, but we’re still gonna talk about this. Call her.”
“I know. Later,” I tell him and go home.
On my way home, I decide to drive over to Xana’s and see if she’s home. Maybe we’ll talk about this weekend and figure this all out. As I pull up to Xana’s house, I can see that both of her parents are here. Mr. Bradford answers the door, and tells me that Xana is asleep. He said he’d tell her to call me when she wakes up. Well, that explains it. I send Stacy a text to let her know what I learned, and head on home.
As I’m getting ready to shower later that night, I realize Xana’s never called me back today. I decide to go ahead and shower before I give her a call. It’s been a long weekend and since I’m still a little sore from the game and long bus ride, I take an extra-long shower to loosen up my muscles.
I finish my shower and get dressed before settling in to call Xana. I find a movie on to watch as I listen to her phone ring. It rings about twenty times before going to voicemail. I figure she’s in the shower, so I leave a message for her to call me. At some point I fall asleep watching television, only to wake up at three in the morning with no response from Xana. I turn the television off and go back to bed, too tired to think of anything but sleep.
Morning comes too early, and by the time I get out of the shower, there is a waiting text from Xana. She doesn’t need a ride this morning. She doesn’t say why, and when I try to call her, she doesn’t answer. Maybe this is a good thing. Stacy didn’t mention anything about her possibly being sick. Maybe her mom is taking her to school. I’ll stop by her house just in case.
By the time we eat lunch, Xana hasn’t shown up for school, and no one was home at her house this morning. Cade told me Stacy still hasn’t heard from her, either. Even Andi hasn’t seen her since Saturday, and said everything was fine when they left. I’m not much company, and don’t hear much of what is being talked about, until Jessica and Mercedes’ conversation catches my attention.
“I know what I’m talking about, Mercedes. I saw the pictures. She was all over him at that choir competition. They are more than just friends,” Jessica insists, and crosses her arms under her chest.
“Little Miss Perfect has finally outed herself. I knew she wasn’t good enough for you, Noel,” Mercedes says apologetically as she holds my hand in hers. My mind wanders to the pictures I saw, and how on Earth Jessica and Mercedes know about them. I look around our group to see everyone looking at me, Cade and Stacy in particular.
“What are you talking about, Lexus?” Kaitlynn asks her, but Jessica responds before she can answer.
“Xana and Blain. They’re obviously together, I’ve seen the pictures,” she says, not trying to disguise the disgust in her voice. Mercedes gives me a sympathetic look, and leans in closer to my side, making me clench my jaw to keep from losing my temper.
“What kind of crap are you spinning now, Jessica,” Stacy asks as she glares at Jessica and Mercedes. Cade places his hand on her knee to keep her from going over to them. I’m more than curious to see what they have to say, but I don’t want to have this conversation in front of everyone.
“I’m not spinning anything. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. Xana is cheating on Noel with Blain,” Jessica says firmly, no doubt she believes what she is saying.
“Show them, Jess. Show them the pictures,” Mercedes insists, still clinging to me.
Jessica digs her phone out of her purse and scrolls through something before handing Stacy the phone. Stacy takes the phone abruptly from her hands and Cade looks over her shoulder to see what all the fuss is about. The look on Stacy and Cade’s face looks like what I imagine mine did when I saw them Saturday.
“Now you can see Xana for what she really is, Stacy, a slut.” Mercedes looks happy as Stacy and Cade take in her words. She turns to me, and her smile drops from her face.
“Don’t you ever talk about her, you bitch,” Stacy shouts at Mercedes as she stands up to walk over to the two of them. Cade puts his arms around her waist before she can take more than one step. Mercedes and Jessica look less sure of themselves as Stacy continues to rant at them.
“You don’t know what you are talking about! Xana and Blain ARE NOT dating! They are FRIENDS! They’ve always been friends. These pictures don’t prove a damn thing!”
Stacy throws the phone back at Jessica. “Noel, TELL HER!” Stacy motions to me, but I remain in my seat, staring at the floor of the orchestra hall. Stacy’s face is three shades of red, and Cade is whispering in her ear to calm her down.
Cade looks over to me when I raise my head, “I saw those pictures at the game on Saturday,” I say to Cade. Fortunately, the bell rings and Jessica grabs her things and leaves quickly, Mercedes staying beside me.
“Get out of here, Lexus! Go follow your girlfriend back to her corner,” Stacy orders her.
“Just go,” I tell Mercedes when she tries to stay with me. I stand and pick up my books, and walk out of the room with Jason, a fuming Stacy and confused Cade left behind. Nothing makes sense anymore. They say they’re friends, but those pictures…those pictures piss me off.
After school, I grab my books from my locker and leave before I run into Stacy or Blain. I just need to get out of here so I can figure out what the hell is going on. My head is beginning to hurt and I just want some peace and quiet. I decide to go to the batting cages and hit a few balls. My thoughts always disappear when I’m batting repeatedly.
I’m able to convince Mom that I need to stay home from school this morning. I hated to do it, but I played the Aunt Flo card, and told her I was in a lot of pain so I just needed to sleep it off. I may or may not have had a slight fever to go with it. Mom never questions me on things like that. It happens sometimes. You know what they say, desperate times and desperate measures and all of that jazz. I just couldn’t face anyone. God bless Mom for understanding when I just need a day.
Stacy tried to call me all day yesterday, and even had Cade trying to call. I just turned off the ringer, and caught up on some projects I had put on the back burner since we had so many extra choir rehearsals. It was nice to be alone and away from everything I couldn’t make sense of. Noel tried to call me, but I never answered. I was surprised he tried at all since we haven’t spoken in days.
I texted Blain before lunch and asked him to pick up some of my assignments for me, I’m glad he always checks for messages while we’re at lunch. I asked him not to say anything to anyone about it, so I know he’ll have a lot of questions when he brings my work to me after he runs errands for his mom. He always knows what to do. Sometimes I wish we really were brother and sister.
Mom and Dad are going out to dinner with some friends from Dad’s office so I’m on my own for dinner. Having the large screen television all to myself is amazing, but I decide to sit outside on the back deck and draw. I’m halfway through a drawing of one of my mom’s irises when I hear a car pulling into the driveway. A minute later I see Blain walking around the side of the house carrying my books. How did he know I’d be out here?
Blain walks up onto the deck and sits in the chair beside me. He lays my books on the patio table and looks me over.
“You wanna talk about it?” He raises his eyebrow and cocks his head, waiting for me to answer.
“Not really, but I know you aren’t leaving until we do.” I close my notebook and look down at my hands picking at the cover’s edge. I release a sigh and begin telling Blain everything. The rumors about Noel kissing other girls, all of the nasty things people are saying about me, and the fact that he didn’t call or text me all day Saturday, even though I had tried to reach him multiple times, and I told him about Lay-Me answering his phone last night.
“Well, you’re really not going to like what I have to tell you now. Maybe we should go inside before I tell you.” Blain looks at me skeptically.
“Just spit it out! I’m not going to break,” I snap at him, immediately feeling guilty for yelling at him like that.
“Okay, but I warned you. I ran into Stacy and Cade after school. I have no idea where Noel was, but they stopped me before I could get to my locker. They wanted to tell me about a few things that were said at lunch, and apparently all over school, about you and me.” Blain pauses for me to absorb what he’s said. I nod at him to continue, and he nods back to me.
“Apparently, someone at the choir competition took pictures of you and me hanging out in the auditorium there and also at the mall. There were even a few pictures of us in the movies.”
“So, what’s the big deal?” I ask, clearly confused as to why that’s such a big deal.
“Whoever took the pictures really made us look bad. Apparently, Noel was shown those pictures on Saturday at the game, and it seems you were accused of cheating on Noel with me.”
“But he knows that’s not true,” I tell him adamantly, my head shaking in denial.
“Stacy said he didn’t really defend you when Mercedes and Jessica told everyone. Cade even said he just sat there and let them talk,” Blain explains as he holds my hands. He looks me in the eye until I stand up and rush inside, my notebook falling to the deck. He follows me to the bathroom, watching my every move.
Tears are running down my face as I fall to the floor. Blain grabs some toilet tissue and hands it to me. I blow my nose and wipe away the tears that won’t stop. “But, he knows we’re friends, that you’re like my brother. You are my brother, Blain,” I sob. “Why would he believe them? What have I ever done to make him think otherwise?”
Blain hands me more toilet paper and I blow my nose again. He pulls me to his side and wraps me in a hug. “You haven’t, we didn’t do anything Saturday to make him think that. I know we had some problems earlier, but we’re past that now and he should know that. He’s an idiot if he believes them.”
Blain stands and reaches down to help me up from the bathroom floor. Once I’m upright, he takes my hand and tugs me into the living room. “Go sit down and find us something to watch. I’m going to order some Chinese takeout, and we’re going to forget about everything for a little bit. I’ll hang out here until your parents get home, okay?” Blain walks over to get the phone from the coffee table and orders our dinner.
“Okay,” I say quietly, blowing my nose one last time. My tears have mostly stopped and my head is beginning to hurt again. Having ordered our food, Blain sits beside me on the couch, and pulls me to his side. I find Catching Fire on one of the movie channels and we settle in to watch Katniss kick some butt.
Soon, the doorbell rings, and Blain goes to the door to meet the delivery guy. I’m watching Katniss be threatened by President Snow when I hear Noel’s voice. What the hell is he doing here?
I make my way to the front door to find Blain blocking Noel from entering the house. Noel sees me enter the entryway and calls out my name. I freeze at the cold tone in his voice, “Xana.”
Blain looks at me over his shoulder and silently questions if I want to talk to him. Nodding, I walk toward them standing in the doorway.
“Noel,” I stand beside Blain and he takes a step backward, allowing me to face Noel. Blain doesn’t move any farther away, watching the interactions between us in case he needs to intervene.
“You weren’t at school today. Are you okay?” Noel asks me, but turns to stare at Blain. “Why are you here, Blain?”
“He brought my books over so I could work on what I’ve missed. Why are you here?” I ask, unable to hide my irritation.
“Me? I came over to see how you were. You haven’t answered any of my texts or calls. What’s going on, Xan?” Noel is obviously frustrated and angry with me, but I really don’t see why. He’s the one who totally forgot about me on Saturday.
“Let’s see, I got NO texts or calls from you Saturday, even though I tried all day to reach you, and you only tried twice yesterday. Besides, I thought you were too occupied with Lexus Saturday night to even think about me. She made that fact perfectly clear. So forgive me if I don’t feel the need to jump every time you call when you can’t even return the favor.” I move to close the door, but Noel’s foot keeps me from closing it.
“What the hell are you talking about? What does Mercedes have to do with you not answering me, and where do you get off accusing me of things when you’re the one who was caught with their hand in the cookie jar,�
� Noel yells at me, and gives Blain a look of disgust, but doesn’t stop there. Blain takes a few steps over to the entryway table, still close enough to help if I need him.
“Not only were you and Blain all over each other Saturday, look who I find at your house when you are supposedly sick. Not your boyfriend. No, it’s Blain. He looks like he’s more than just a friend to me.” Noel scowls as he crosses his arms in front of him, causing Blain to move to my side. He is not happy with how Noel is behaving, and I can tell he is about two minutes away from shoving him out of the door.
I am trying hard not to let him see me cry. I can’t believe he’s so angry over something that isn’t even true. How can he say those things to me? “He just brought my homework to me, and what you think happened Saturday, never happened. I’m not like that, and I thought you were too, but now I know differently. I know about you kissing Mercedes. BOTH TIMES! And I know you were busy with Lay-Me Saturday night at Liam’s house. She made that perfectly clear when she answered your phone.”
“I’ve had to listen to people talking about you only dating me because I’m a senior for over a year. That you hate spending so much time being my chauffeur, and wish I’d finally take care of myself. I told myself they were just jealous and talking shit to get to me, but now I know they were right. If you really did care about me, you’d know that all of these things you’ve accused me of would never be true, and you’d sure as hell never get with that slut like you did on Saturday.” By now, my hands and voice are shaking and I can barely breathe. I’ve never been so mad, but I will not let him see me cry.
“I think you need to leave, Noel,” Blain tells Noel, moving in front of me to shut the door. “You’ve said enough.”
“Yeah, stick up for your girlfriend. You two are made for each other.” Noel stalks his way back to his car, and stands by his door. Looking over the roof of the Mustang, he shakes his head at me before getting in his car and speeding away from my house.