Follies and Nonsense

by Martin Hunnicutt

  “All of my maids have left my service with a greater education than when they came to work for me!” Caroline replied.

  “I am certain that is true, Miss Bingley,” Sarah agreed, her answer carefully crafted to allow the lady to know her understanding what working for her would mean.

  “There are no maids here in the countryside,” Caroline fussed. “Tell me what it will take to hire you today!”

  Having heard enough, Elizabeth walked from the kitchens into the hallway and caught Caroline by surprise.

  “Miss Bingley, I insist that you not importune the staff during your visits,” she said after coming to stand between her maid and the visitor. “If you have need of a new maid, I recommend that you consult with your housekeeper at Netherfield. She would know of any maids in the neighbourhood who would be available to serve you.”

  “Hmmm….” Caroline said but she turned and retreated to the parlour without a comment. When the lady entered the parlour and the door closed, Sarah turned to Elizabeth.

  “Mrs. Hamilton, I assure you that I never…”

  Stepping closer to her maid, Elizabeth touched Sarah’s arm briefly. “Do not spend a moment worrying about Miss Bingley. She was very improper to approach you in the hallway without speaking to me first.”

  “Thank you, Mrs. Hamilton,” the maid said as she curtsied and hurried up the stairs.

  Now angry with Miss Bingley, Elizabeth stepped to the back door and taking a cloak from one of the hooks beside the door, she ventured outside and away from her guests.

  “Mrs. Hamilton, where are you going?” asked Mrs. Hill who followed her out of the door. “Mrs. Bennet will be looking for you!”

  Turning back for a moment, Elizabeth said, “Please tell Mamma I needed a moment to clear my head. I shall return with the gentlemen.”

  Shaking her head slowly, Mrs. Hill realized that Mrs. Hamilton was still the young woman who often walked across the fields to visit the neighbours. Walking briskly through the fields and sleeping gardens, Elizabeth forgot the impropriety of Miss Bingley’s questions and the approach to her maid, as she took in the beauty of her childhood home in the late fall.

  ++**++

  After thirty minutes, Elizabeth heard the gun fire as the gentlemen returned from the far ends of Longbourn’s lands. The guns faded away and she found herself greeted by panting dogs followed by Mr. Talbert and his two sons; their sacks loaded with pheasants.

  “Good afternoon, Mrs. Hamilton!” called Mr. Talbert. “We have a feast of birds for the gentlemen!”

  “And enough for your family to eat as well?” she asked.

  One of the Talbert boys nodded. “Yes madam. Mr. Bennet always said that gamekeepers get a share of the birds.”

  “Very good,” Elizabeth replied. “Did the gentlemen enjoy themselves?”

  Mr. Talbert nodded for his sons to move ahead as he paused to speak to the lady. “We did your father proud Miss Elizabeth – uh – Mrs. Hamilton. The fields on the west side were full of birds today and our guests are decent marksmen.”

  “And the gentlemen from Netherfield?”

  “Mr. Bingley is a good shot and he asks lots of questions about the farms around here. And the tall fellow, Mr. Darcy, he’s quiet but hears everything and talks more one-on-one. I was pleased to hear him complement our dogs and size of the birds.”

  The gentlemen approached now and Mr. Talbert bowed before he followed his sons toward Longbourn, leaving Elizabeth to wait as the gentlemen approached. After Sir William Lucas and his son greeted Elizabeth, the other shooters, Mr. Hurst, and Rev. Fallows echoed the friendly conversation. She strolled along with the neighbours as Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy caught up with the others.

  “Mrs. Hamilton, you escaped the house,” observed Mr. Darcy when he and Mr. Bingley bracketed Mrs. Hamilton at the back of the walkers.

  “I did indeed, Mr. Darcy. I found that I needed a moment of air and quiet before dinner.”

  “Were the number of guests overwhelming?” asked Mr. Bingley. Elizabeth nodded her head in agreement and the two gentlemen continued with her in the walk back to the manor house.

  “Mrs. Hamilton, I should like to meet with Mr. Smyth this afternoon if that is possible,” Bingley replied.

  “Our steward?” Elizabeth asked. “I am certain he will be pleased to talk with you Mr. Bingley.”

  “Excellent,” Bingley replied and after a pointed look from Darcy, he explained further. “Forgive me for asking but are you aware of the fence that needs repairs in our adjoining pastures.”

  “I know the estates adjoin but I am not aware of any fences,” she replied.

  “Oh yes, Longbourn and Netherfield share a fence separating pastures where horses, cattle and sheep graze at different times of the year. There are several sections that require repair and I thought it would be an appropriate task for men from both estates to complete this fall.”

  “I am certain Mr. Smyth will be glad to discuss it with you and my sisters will provide any necessary funds for materials.”

  “Miss Bennet and Miss Mary have the purse for Longbourn?” asked Mr. Darcy.

  “Indeed, they do sir,” Elizabeth replied. “They have managed the estate very well in our father’s absence. Our father and mother prepared us to be partners with our husbands in matters of the home and estate.”

  “But have they prepared your sisters to manage the purse for the estate?” asked Mr. Bingley.

  “Who better to know how many cows to keep over the winter than the women who oversee the meals that feed the household and support the tenants?”

  “Are your barns full of hay and grain for the winter?” asked Mr. Darcy.

  “You would have to inquire of my sisters and Mr. Smyth, sir,” Elizabeth replied. “I heard that the grain harvest was good this past summer and prices have remained constant when I have paid for grain and hay for my horses while I am in residence.”

  “You do have a fine pair of carriage horses,” Bingley replied. “An excellent matched pair of greys.”

  “Thank you, sir. They were a gift from my father-in-law.”

  “Might we venture into the stables, Mrs. Hamilton?” asked Mr. Darcy. “I should like to see the pair up close.”

  “Certainly,” Elizabeth agreed. “Do you know horses, sir?”

  “I hope I do,” he replied as Bingley joined the pair in walking toward the Longbourn stables.

  The old building showed signs of repair and new paint. The large door stood open and three cats made their way from the dark depths of the stable to the outside as the walkers stopped outside, looking for the coachman or stable boys.

  “Good afternoon, Mrs. Hamilton,” greeted Mr. Smyth as he came around the side of the stables with the coachman and two stable boys. “How can we be of assistance?”

  “Mr. Smyth, I believe you have met Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy already.”

  “Yes madam, we have met several times discussing the farms.”

  “And I would like to discuss a matter of fences with you, Mr. Smyth, but first Mr. Darcy would like to know more about Mrs. Hamilton’s horses.”

  Turning to the coachman, Mr. Smyth said, “Then Mr. Darcy, you are better speaking to Thomas here. I believe he has handled the carriage team since they were foals.”

  “Indeed?” asked Darcy turning to the coachman who led him into the stables while Elizabeth remained outside to speak with Bingley and Mr. Smyth about fence repairs.

  “Yes sir,” Thomas replied. “Storm and Wind are four-year-olds that were born about a week apart. Their dames were mother and daughter and they have the same sire.”

  “And they’ve always been teamed together?”

  “Yes sir. We had hoped for at least one filly but got two colts and my master decided to make them a twin team after they were gelded.”

  Darcy waited until the driver brought out the team of greys and they stood still while the tall man examined them, checking their sides, legs and hooves.

  “Do you intend to chec
k their teeth, Darcy?” asked Bingley as he escorted Elizabeth into the stable followed by Mr. Smyth.

  “No need,” Darcy replied. “Thomas says they are four-year-olds and his affection for the team reflects in their attention to his commands.”

  He glanced toward Elizabeth. “Will you allow me to drive them sometime? They must be able to go all day without tiring.”

  “Indeed, they can sir,” Thomas answered. “My boys like nothing better than to be in harness and pulling their carriage.”

  “Where did you get these magnificent animals, Mrs. Hamilton?”

  “They were born and bred in my father-in-law’s stables. He gifted them to me and my late husband as a wedding present.”

  Darcy frowned as he glanced deeper into the stable as Thomas returned the two greys to their side-by-side stalls. “And all these other horses? This is a large number for a small estate such as Longbourn.”

  “They are my horses, Mr. Darcy. Come; allow me to introduce you to my equine friends.”

  “My father only has two horses in the stables at present – a pair of farm horses to pull ploughs, hay wagon and the family carriage when needed,” Elizabeth said pointing to the first pair of empty stalls. Pointing at the second pair of empty stalls, she explained, “I brought a second pair of work horses to pull the wagon with our trunks and the saddles and tack for the mares. Those two horses are used on the farms each day and Mr. Smyth has used them to complete improvements in pastures and drainage.”

  Passing the carriage horses, Elizabeth said, “Thomas told you of Storm and Wind.” Stopping in front of the next stall, Elizabeth said, “This is Buttercup, one of my mares. She is five years. Next is her sister, Brownie, who is three years. This grey mare is Memory and I have been with her since her birth, just over two years ago.”

  “Are you riding her yet?”

  “Yes, but I have not allowed my sisters to ride her,” Elizabeth replied. “I have been told she needs one season more to grow into her full height and weight but I ride her more each day.”

  “And this fourth mare?” Darcy asked, looking at a large, black horse.

  “This is Dreaming Lady – she once was my husband’s hunter and I have found her to be an excellent mount.”

  “Did she take the side saddle well after having a man ride her?” Darcy asked approaching the mare. He had a sugar cube in his palm to entice the horse to him and she came, sniffing his offering and then his arm before she took the sugar cube and allowed him to rub along her neck.

  “She has never given me any problems with the side saddle,” Elizabeth replied.

  Glancing at the coachman and stable boys, she added, “All of our horses are trained for gentlemen and ladies to ride, Mr. Darcy. Dreaming Lady has been exercised almost every day since we arrived at Longbourn by one of my sisters or the stable boys.”

  “This is a fine horse,” he said quickly. “Look at the legs and the muscles in the shoulders. She’s got a solid back.”

  He glanced at the coachman and Elizabeth. “Has she been bred?”

  “Dreaming Lady is six years and Memory is her filly,” Elizabeth answered. “But she has not foaled again since – my father-in-law wanted her to rest this past year.”

  “Would you ask your man to lead her out?”

  Surprised but willing to accommodate the guest – his enthusiasm for the horses did him credit in Elizabeth’s eyes – she directed Thomas to lead Dreaming Lady out of her stall. All of the other horses gathered at their doorways to watch the inspection as Mr. Darcy examined the mare’s hooves and lifted her tail.

  “She’s coming into season very soon,” Darcy told Thomas and Elizabeth. “Do you have a stud to breed with her?”

  “My father keeps no stallions on the estate.”

  “That will be a lost opportunity,” said Bingley. “I don’t have a stallion in my stables to loan you, Mrs. Hamilton.”

  He winked at Darcy who failed to understand Bingley’s hint and watched one of the stable boys return the mare to her stall.

  “We should ride sometime Mrs. Hamilton,” Darcy said. “I would like to see these horses in motion.”

  “Darcy – what an excellent idea!” Bingley declared. “The ladies can join the fox hunt I have planned at Netherfield.”

  “Bingley, ladies do not ride with the hunters…” Darcy tried to explain.

  “I would be pleased to join you, Mr. Bingley and I am sure Jane and Kitty will ride with me,” Elizabeth replied quickly to interrupt Mr. Darcy. “While I agree that we will not attempt to jump the hedges and fences with the gentlemen, we will follow the hunt quite closely.”

  “Miss Bennet rides well enough to join the hunt?” Bingley asked. “Marvellous!”

  “A fox hunt will be just the thing before the cold weather closes in for winter,” Elizabeth said. “Do you not you think Mr. Darcy?”

  “And when there is a fox hunt, there must be a ball! Is that not so, Mrs. Hamilton?” Bingley asked.

  “I believe tradition is for a ball to occur within a fortnight of the fox hunt, Mr. Bingley,” replied she, though the lady kept her eyes on Mr. Darcy who stared back at her.

  “Well, then… what do you say Darcy?” Bingley asked. “Shall we have a ball to celebrate a successful hunting season?”

  “Certainly Charles,” Darcy replied. “I should look forward to the dancing.”

  ++**++

  At dinner, Elizabeth found Mr. Darcy seated beside her with Miss Bingley on his other side, followed by her brother and then Jane. The meal progressed through the first course with conversation regarding the land, the weather and the shooting. When Mr. Darcy’s attention to Mrs. Hamilton grew too much, Caroline injected a new subject into the conversation with Mr. Darcy to exclude the others at the dinner table.

  “Tell me Mr. Darcy, is Miss Darcy much grown since the spring?”

  “She has grown very tall,” the gentleman replied, shifting in his chair and sitting back to include both ladies in the conversation. “She is now about Miss Elizabeth Bennet's height, or rather taller.”

  “How I long to see her again! I never met with anybody who delighted me so much. Such a countenance, such manners! And so extremely accomplished for her age! Her performance on the pianoforte is exquisite.”

  “I am amazed how young ladies have the patience to be so very accomplished,” said Bingley from further down the table.

  “All young ladies accomplished! My dear Charles, what do you mean?” Caroline asked turning her head briefly toward her brother.

  “Yes, I am sure I never heard a young lady spoken of for the first time, without being informed that she was very accomplished.”

  “Your list of the common extent of accomplishments has too much truth,” said Darcy. “The word is applied to many a woman who can only cover a screen. But I am very far from agreeing with you in your estimation of ladies in general. I cannot boast of knowing more than half-a-dozen ladies that are really accomplished.”

  “Nor I,” agreed Miss Bingley.

  “Then you must comprehend a great deal in your idea of an accomplished woman,” observed Elizabeth.

  “Yes, I do comprehend a great deal in it,” Mr. Darcy replied but before he could continue, Miss Bingley interjected herself again.

  “Oh certainly, no young lady can be really esteemed accomplished without a thorough knowledge of music, singing, drawing, dancing, and the modern languages.”

  Caroline glanced at Mr. Darcy again before she continued, “To these accomplishments, she must possess a certain something in her air and manner of walking, the tone of her voice and expressions.”

  At this point, Darcy added, “And she must add something more substantial by the improvement of her mind by extensive reading.”

  Unable to contain herself any longer, Elizabeth said, “I am no longer surprised at your knowing only six accomplished women. I rather wonder at your knowing any.”

  “Are you so severe upon your own sex as to doubt the possibility?” asked Darcy />
  “I never saw such a woman. I never saw such capacity, and taste, and application, and elegance in one lady,” declared Elizabeth.

  Miss Bingley protested, “Mrs. Hamilton! The first circles of polite society have many such ladies. My favourite acquaintance – Lady Gwendolyn Howell is one such lady – all of her relatives are accomplished ladies.”

  A sudden cough from Jane distracted Bingley for a moment. “Miss Bennet, are you well.”

  Darcy noticed Elizabeth’s face struggling to remain composed as she asked, “Are you acquainted with Lady Gwendolyn then?”

  Darcy sat back in the chair and did not join the exchange.

  “I have met Lady Gwendolyn at many events in town. She represents all that is fashionable and accomplished,” Caroline insisted.

  “I remember reading of her wedding in August,” Elizabeth said. “Did you hear of it?”

  Darcy noticed two things; Mary Bennet paid attention to the conversation from this point and allowed young Mr. Lucas’s attention to stray for the first time that evening; and Jane Bennet struggled to control her face and not smile too widely.

  “It was a small family affair,” Caroline replied confidently.

  “The wedding was on a Wednesday, I believe,” Elizabeth said.

  “Yes,” Caroline replied. “And the wedding was a small, family affair so I did not attend.”

  “I thought it was held at St. Paul’s with over three hundred lords and ladies in attendance?” Elizabeth said. “I am certain the paper said it was a very large party and a marvellous wedding breakfast at Howell’s house in town.”

  “I must have confused it with another wedding,” Miss Bingley said.

  “And wasn’t there a ball on Monday night before?” asked Mary Bennet. “I remember reading a detailed account of titled guests and dances at the ball.”

  Turning to Elizabeth, Mary asked, “Remember the report in the paper included a description of a duke or some other notable person dancing with some of the ladies?”

  Jane cleared her throat to draw the attention of her sisters and she frowned at them both.

  “Did you attend the ball, Miss Bingley?” asked Mr. Lucas from the other side of Mary. “Did you see…?”