by Sean Michael
“You want some?”
“Not on an empty stomach, and I usually don’t on the change.”
“Yeah. Does it feel good?” He shook his head. Why ask? Why torture himself?
“What? The change?”
“Yeah.” He took another sip, refusing to look at Barker.
“It feels like something’s missing. Except last night. Last night felt almost perfect.”
He nodded, not trusting himself to speak over the huge lump of shame in his throat.
Barker stirred the beans a few times and then grabbed two spoons and brought the pot over to the old green couch. He put the pot on the coffee table and sat. “Help me eat this. You’ll feel better with food in your belly.”
There was no way he could swallow, but he went and sat. Barker’s hand slid over to his knee, stroking his skin. Cody ducked Barker’s gaze, squeezed his eyes shut and focused on breathing. In. Out. In. Out.
Barker growled. “My touch can’t be that awful.”
“No. No, it’s fucking heaven.” Did he say that out loud?
“Good.” Looked like he had; there was a wealth of satisfaction in Barker’s voice.
He stood up, headed for the door. “I need to walk.”
“No. You need to eat.” Barker growled and was next to him, grabbing his arm before he could blink. “Don’t make me force feed you.”
“Don’t snarl at me!”
“Then stop trying to run away!”
“I can’t!” He didn’t know how.
“Sure you can, you just don’t run whenever you see me.”
“You…” He whipped around and stared at Barker. “You are insane.”
“What? It’s not insane to want to be with your mate.”
“It is if your mate is broken.”
“Not when I want to fix you.”
“I can’t. You can’t. I’ve tried.” He found himself stepping closer; he couldn’t help himself.
“We haven’t tried, though.” Barker’s hands slid around his arms and tugged him even closer.
“It won’t work.” Barker was so fucking warm.
“You don’t know that.” Barker pulled him right up against all those muscles, hands moving to slide along his back.
“I…” His eyes closed, a deep moan vibrating through him. Fuck. Yes.
“Need me. You might not want to admit it, but that’s why you’ve come so close time after time. You need me.”
The words rumbled in his ears, the warm fingers landing on his ass, squeezing lightly. “I hate you.” He leaned in, cheek on Barker’s shoulder.
“I know.” Barker kissed the top of his head. “You’re mine, though. And I’m yours.”
He wanted that to be enough, but he knew it wasn’t. Not for him, not for Barker.
“We’ll figure it out, Cody. Two heads are better than one.”
He snorted softly. “What are you? A counselor in your day job?”
“Fuck off. I just know we can’t keep going on like this.”
“You could have killed me last night, you know?”
“That’s not an option.” Barker’s arms tightened around him.
“You were beautiful.” He whispered the words.
“I felt you, inside.”
“I just hurt.”
“We’ll get you fixed. We will.”
“Then do it.”
Barker growled at him. He sighed. Like it was that fucking easy?
Barker tilted his head, took his mouth. For this once—only once more—Cody let him. The kiss was long and slow and devastatingly intense. He found himself getting lost in it, arching into Barker’s arms, his worry dissipating with a pop.
Barker pulled Cody’s shirt out of his waistband, hands hot against his skin. The touch was magic, fascinating, and he needed it. Barker found his nipples, pinching one and then the other, the touches like electricity. Cody snarled, teeth bared, the little ache perfect. Barker snarled in reply, teeth grazing along his lips.
Son of a bitch. Hot bastard. Lover. Mate. His.
Barker grabbed his ass and tugged him back over to the bed, fingers snagging in his clothing. He went eagerly, running his hands over Barker’s skin. Something tore, but he didn’t care, not once Barker’s hands were on his skin and that fine body pressed up against him.
“Please. I need.” Cody didn’t want to think anymore.
“I’ve got you.” Barker pressed him down into the mattress, mouth covering his.
He opened up, let himself have this fully, completely, his entire body aching—from need, not shame. Barker slid between his legs, that thick cock finding his hole and nudging it, pushing against him.
“Please.” He bore down, took Barker in.
“So fucking tight.” Barker pushed in and in, filling him up so good.
“Need.” He did, fiercely. Wildly.
Nodding, Barker started to fuck him, cock driving into him hard, just like he needed. He’d never been fucked during the full moon. Never. And it was so good. Barker’s eyes glowed down at him, low growls and deep rumbles coming from his mate’s throat.
He knew his eyes matched Barker’s, and he arched, demanding it, demanding more and harder and oh, fuck yeah. His mate gave it to him, gave him everything, hard and fast and strong. The pleasure was huge, overwhelming him, and he didn’t fight it, he just let it take him.
Barker howled, the sound calling to something deep, deep inside him. His voice answered Barker’s, the sound tearing from him. They humped and rutted together, bodies twisting, trying to merge into one.
“Help me. Fuck. Help me.” Cody wasn’t sure if he was making sense at all.
Barker’s hand wrapped around his cock, tugging it hard with every thrust into his body. His orgasm was caught inside him, trapped, swelling and filling him. Barker’s mouth closed on his, the kiss leaving him absolutely breathless. His nearly silent scream was pure need, pure frustration.
Faster, harder, Barker slammed into him endlessly. The tension circled inside him, spun within him, faster and faster, more and more maddening. Growling, Barker bit his neck hard, marking him where anyone could see.
Cody sobbed, then Barker bit again, teeth sinking in, punching through his skin, and he screamed, seed pulsing out of him. Barker’s spunk pushed into him as he came, his howl filling the cabin.
Everything in him shuddered, shook; he bit at the air. Barker’s mouth stayed open on his neck, breath hot against his skin. He tried to speak, but nothing came out.
“I have you, mate.”
His eyes rolled, and he keened. Barker answered the sound, with him, right there.
Something inside him twisted, growled, trying to escape.
Barker stayed buried inside his boy, mouth open on his throat. “Mate.”
He nodded, yipping, trying to agree.
“Yes.” Barker’s voice growled and rumbled, vibrated against his skin.
He needed to move, to run. Something.
Barker slid out of his body and looked down at him, “Come outside with me. Into the woods.”
He looked at the food then nodded, stood, nose twitching. Barker grabbed his hand and pulled him up, not even letting him get dressed again before going out the front door and running with him into the woods. He groaned, toes digging into the dirt, the scents of nature overwhelming.
Barker moved faster and faster, tugging him along as they moved deeper into the forest. He kept up, leg muscles burning, heart pounding, and it all felt so good. Barker put his head back as they ran and howled, the sound again calling to something deep inside him. An answer tore out of him, seeming to split his chest.
Little yips and howls came from Barker in reply, even a breathless chuff. Mate. His mate. Cody laughed, the sound completely inhuman and odd, but happy. They just went and went, Barker running them hard.
The sunlight was dimmer here, dappled, the world black and white and gray. He hadn’t thought he would be able to run so far and so long, but somehow, with Barker, it was easy. They sto
pped, panting, ending on hands and knees, fingers like claws in the fallen leaves.
Barker laughed, rubbing their cheeks together. Cody licked Barker’s chin, growling happily. Mate. Barker bit at his neck, a happy growl matching his own. Those teeth found that same mark, the sting wild, sharp. Barker’s growls got louder, vibrating inside him.
His head ducked, and he offered his mate his nape. Barker took it, teeth sinking in, the heat from his breath warming Cody through. His body shuddered, his spine arching up. Barker’s growls got louder, possessive.
He yipped, hips canting up and offering his submission. Alpha. Mate. Barker laughed, hands running over him, rubbing hard over his shoulders and along his spine. He stretched hard, the touch delicious, perfect.
“You’re beautiful,” murmured Barker, that great, growly voice almost making him shiver.
He leaned over, licked his mate’s wrist, panting at the flavor. Barker held his hand out, offering his palm for more licking. Mate. Mate. The flavor filled him, soothed him, and he flopped down, relaxing on the soft ground.
Barker landed on the ground with him, wrapping around him.
“Mate,” whispered Barker. “So good.”
He chuffed his agreement.
So good.
So good, mate.
Chapter Five
Barker lay curled around his mate. His very furry, four-legged mate. Somehow, someway, Cody had changed while they’d run, turning into a gorgeous, russet-coated wolf. Cody was beautiful. And a wolf during full sunlight. It shouldn’t have been possible.
And yet, there Cody was.
He rubbed the soft fur, giving Cody some loving. Cody’s tail wagged, tongue lolling. The closed eyes cracked open, glinting at him.
“Hey.” He grinned, rubbed Cody’s nose. That tongue lapped at his fingers, hot, wet. He could howl with joy. Look at his mate. “Beautiful. God, you’re so beautiful.”
Cody rolled over, head landing in his lap, heavy and perfect.
He kept petting, talking softly. “I don’t get why you changed during the day, but I think the important thing here is that you changed, huh? Who knew running in the forest would do it?”
Clay blinked up at him, chirruping softly.
He tilted his head. “You aren’t, like, stuck like that now, are you? Because it would suck if you finally changed, but you were a wolf while I was a man and vice versa.”
Cody looked at him, barked once then scrambled to his feet, eyes rolling.
“Hey, hey.” Barker went onto his knees, hands reaching for his mate.
The little barks were frightened now, and he realized suddenly that Cody hadn’t noticed. Cody didn’t know.
“Mate. Love. It’s okay. You’ve shifted. You made it!” He stroked his hands along Cody’s flanks.
Those lean muscles shuddered, shivering against him, pushing into his hands.
He stroked and rubbed, nuzzling his cheeks against Cody’s furry ones. “This is a good thing, Cody. This is what we wanted. You can shift. You shifted! In the daylight!”
Cody panted, body shivering, wavering between wolf and human.
“Okay. Imagine kissing me. You need to be human to do that, because trust me, I’m not going to kiss that muzzle of yours, so you need to be human, okay?”
Cody’s head bobbed, the change hard, unsteady, leaving Cody boneless, gasping for air, and mostly human.
“Okay. Okay. See? There you go.” He touched Cody’s naked body, hands sliding, making sure his lover was okay.
“M…mate.” Cody blinked at him, obviously dazed.
“Yeah. Yeah, that’s me.” Barker laughed and pressed their lips together. Wow. Just…wow.
Cody’s eyes weren’t glowing. They were human, blue, normal. Barker gasped.
“What? What’s wrong?” Cody asked.
“Your eyes…”
Cody closed his eyes, turned away from him.
He tugged Cody back around. “Look at me, babe. Look at me.”
Cody blinked up, looked at him with those pretty eyes. Those normal eyes.
“Your eyes are blue.”
“Really?” Cody blinked, hands lifting to his face. “You promise?”
“I swear to God, Cody. You have blue eyes. And you were just a wolf. You shifted.”
“But…But I can’t. It’s not nighttime.”
“I know. Weird, isn’t it? But you changed, plain as…well, day. And now your eyes are blue. My God, your eyes are blue.”
“What…” Cody started shivering, chest heaving. “I. I. I…”
Barker wrapped around his mate, holding on.
“I don’t. I can’t…” The lean muscles were heaving, the wiry body trying to shift again.
Fuck. Barker pressed his mouth on Cody’s, pushing his tongue in.
Cody grabbed him, kissed him back then pulled away, eyes glowing. “I changed?”
“You changed. I think you’re getting ready to do it again. Can you feel it?”
“I feel…breathless.”
“But not in pain. Not anymore, right?”
“No. No, tight. I feel tight.”
“That’s the full moon. Even when it’s on the other side of the world, it calls to the beast, makes it heavy, big.”
“Yes. Heavy. It’s heavy.” Cody was panting, face trying to elongate.
“Change if you need to. Let it happen—don’t fight it.” Barker couldn’t believe this was happening in broad daylight.
“I don’t know ho-oooooooooooooooooooo.” The word turned into a howl, his mate growing heavy, more solid in his arms.
It was stunning to see the long body settle into its form.
“Oh, mate. Beautiful. Really. You are.”
Cody wagged, tongue lolling. Laughing, Barker scratched Cody’s ears and petted the soft fur.
“I can’t believe it.”
Cody leaned into him, tongue on his thigh.
“You’re going to have to wait until tonight to run with me.” Another horrible thought occurred to him. What if Cody could only change during the day? Barker could only change at night. That would be…well, better than Cody not being able to change at all.
Cody chuffed, nudged him. As his mate was so unique, he wasn’t sure how much Cody understood, how much Cody heard.
“I can run a little, I guess.” He chuckled, looking down at himself. “Back to the cabin, okay?”
Cody barked, bounced, and he laughed at the pure, unadulterated joy.
“Come on then!” He turned and started to run back the way they’d come.
Cody nipped at his heels, chuffing, barking at him.
“I’m going as fast as I can!”
Cody stopped, sniffed, ears twitching. Someone was hunting.
“We could go together tonight.”
Hunting. He could hunt with his mate. He wanted to scream with joy. So he did. He ran and ran, Cody at his heels, and he shouted to the trees, to the earth and the sky. His mate! His mate was whole! He shouted harder, ran harder, laughed as Cody nipped at his heels.
They hit the cabin, Cody leaping, jumping on the bed.
He shook his head, panting hard. “You’re going to have to change back if you want that.”
Cody rolled, tail thumping. Barker pounced on his mate, fingers digging into the lovely, thick hair. The belly fur was incredibly soft, thick, and white. Incredible.
“Mate.” Fuck, Barker was so proud.
Cody’s paws stretched, batting the air. He could see Cody trying to change again, trying to shift.
“Yeah, that’s it. It’ll be easier with practice. Think of being human, of kissing me with real lips.”
Those pretty eyes fastened onto his. So fine.
“Come on. I want to celebrate with you. Kiss you. Take you. Revel in the fact that you changed!”
He could see Cody, the human, coming to the fore, so close.
“You can do it. It just takes practice.”
Cody panted, slowly, painstakingly coming back to him.
“There you are.” He pressed kisses over Cody’s face then took his mouth. “God, you’re something else, Cody. Mate.”
“I shifted.” Cody looked stunned.
He laughed and rolled Cody beneath him, rubbing against the warm body. “You did!”
“I did. Did you see?”
“Of course I saw! You’re gorgeous.”
Cody kissed him. “What changed? What happened?”
“I don’t know. But you changed without the moon. During the day. Full sun. While we were running…”
“We don’t change in the daylight.”
“I know. But you did.” Of course, he was still worried it might mean that Cody couldn’t change under the moon’s light.
“Still a freak.” Cody winked, and he heard the worry in those words.
“Hey, you can change. Let’s take that as a good sign, okay? Let’s enjoy that.” Barker kissed Cody hard again. “And you’re mine.”
“Stubborn.” Cody wrapped around him, arms and legs.
“Yeah, well, it works for me.” He held onto Cody just as tightly.
“Mate. I changed.”
“You did. My mate. I can’t wait for sundown.”
“What…what if I don’t?”
“You will.” He put everything into the two words.
Cody smiled at him and, for the first time in…forever, Cody trusted him. He pressed their lips together, opening and pushing his tongue in.
No matter what happened, they were together.
* * * * *
They ate. They slept. They slept hard. Cody hadn’t done so without pain in a decade, so he wallowed in it. Barker said he changed three times in his sleep. In his sleep, like it was easy.
Barker was curled up around him, hand on his belly. Every now and then, Barker would nuzzle his neck, breathe in. He hummed softly, eyes closing again, the relief of being pain free almost making him light.
“Smiling. Mate. Can you feel the moon coming?”
“All I know is that it doesn’t hurt.”
“That’s wonderful.” Barker laughed.
He nodded, chuffing softly. “I’m glad you were here.” Even if it never happened again, he was glad Barker had been part of it.
“Me, too. You changed during the day! I just can’t believe it. Except that I saw it.”