The Nurse Who Saved Christmas

by Janice Lynn

  “I’m waiting.” Danielle tapped her slinky black high heels against the ballroom floor. “Were you such a good girl this year that Santa arranged for Dr. Kelley to be in your stocking?”

  “Now isn’t the time for details about my relationship with Dirk.” Not to mention that she didn’t know how to define their relationship.

  “You’re admitting you have a relationship with Dirk?” Her friend put emphasis on the use of his given name rather than his title of Dr. Kelley.

  He’d been Dirk from the moment she’d glanced into his eyes and felt as if she were drowning in a blue sea of Christmas ribbon. With all her volunteering with the community outreach program, she hadn’t found the time to call her best friend and they’d been on different shifts at the hospital. She hadn’t told anyone about the morning she’d spent with Dirk. Perhaps if their relationship hadn’t ended almost as fast as they’d started… And if they’d ended, what was tonight about? And why did she fluctuate between giddy and the need to protect her heart?

  “I’m not admitting anything. Not here.” Abby’s gaze shifted to him again. Just looking at him made her feel as if she was all tangled up and would never be able to free herself. “But I like him, if that’s what you’re asking.”

  “You like him? Girl, that isn’t ‘like’ I see in your eyes,” Danielle teased, her grin growing bigger in direct proportion to Abby’s face growing hotter. “You are so telling me everything soon.”

  “Everything,” Abby agreed. Which was what? Dirk hadn’t called or even talked to her at the hospital other than about patients and to confirm what time to pick her up. After his Santa debut and him asking her out for tonight, she’d jumped every time her phone had rung, hoping he’d call. She’d been disappointed every time. Disappointed that he hadn’t made any effort to talk to her outside the parameters of work.

  Until tonight.

  Tonight, he’d been a considerate date, if quiet, taking her white faux-fur wrap and gloves to the designated coat room, ensuring she had everything she wanted to drink and eat, even making the comment that her goodies tasted better than the ones supplied by the party’s caterer.

  Yet that ever-present awkwardness, awareness, kept her slightly on edge, not letting her completely relax, making her stomach stay slightly knotted with tension. That’s why she’d needed a breather. Being so close to Dirk, his hand occasionally resting possessively on her back, she’d been on the verge of swooning from lack of air.

  On the verge of grabbing his hand and dragging him to a room and kissing him like crazy in hopes of abating whatever this burn inside her was.

  Abby covered her mouth with her hand, biting back a slight smile at what Dirk would do, say, if she marched over to him and did just that. Bet that wouldn’t do a thing to ease the edginess she’d sensed about him all evening. Because of her? Or the Christmas party?

  Danielle eyed her a moment, taking note of exactly what Abby wasn’t sure, just that her friend’s smile faded. “You okay? You look flushed.”

  Any flush on her face was from her thoughts, not from not feeling okay. Actually, the bug that had been bothering her earlier in the week was sticking around. But, fortunately, by the time Dirk had arrived she’d been fine. When he’d looked at her as if she was more mouth-watering than any piece of peppermint candy, had told her she was beautiful, well, she’d been over the moon.

  If she’d stop trying to label whatever was happening between them and could just enjoy the fact that something was happening, everything would be wonderful.

  She visually sought out where he still stood with the group of golfing physicians. He wasn’t saying much, just listening to the others. Dirk didn’t have to say much. The man would stand out in any crowd. Not just because of his height or his good looks or even his quick intelligence. No, he’d stand out because of the confident way he held himself, the pure aura of testosterone that clung to him and demanded women take notice, even though he seemed oblivious to the fact he was gorgeous.

  Abby noticed. From his thick black hair to the tailored lines of his dinner jacket and trousers to the pointed toes of his Italian shoes, she noticed. And liked. She definitely liked.

  “How could I not be okay?” she practically sighed, wondering if Danielle would scoop her up if she melted into an Abby puddle. Dirk liquefied her insides. Any moment she might slosh to the floor.

  “Right,” Danielle replied, her gaze following Abby’s. “Got to admit, that man is fine. A little quiet and brooding for my taste, but he is easy on the eye.”

  Very easy on the eye. She’d seen more than one envious look her way when they entered the hotel ballroom.

  “Just because he doesn’t like Christmas doesn’t mean he’s brooding,” Abby defended. “Plus, he isn’t quiet once you get to know him. He has a great sense of humor.”

  Just recalling how he’d teased her made her insides toasty warm.

  “I didn’t know Dr. Dreamboat doesn’t like Christmas and I still think he’s brooding,” Danielle pointed out.

  Okay, so maybe a little brooding.

  “The man keeps to himself, doesn’t socialize, rarely talks to anyone outside anything to do with a patient or work. That’s okay, mind you. He’s probably just a private person, but that’s not my style. Although…” she glanced toward where Dirk stood “…in his case, I could be convinced to make an exception.” Danielle gave a little shake of her head. “Seriously, he doesn’t like Christmas? Talk about your opposites attracting. Does he know you’re the Queen of Holiday Cheer?”

  “He knows.” Recalling their conversation about the holidays, Abby tried not to wince. She’d just focus on the positive. “He likes my peanut-butter fudge.”

  “I’ll just bet he does.” Danielle snickered.

  Abby rolled her eyes, but couldn’t keep her smile from her face. “He stepped in and played Santa the other day at the community center, too.”

  See, there was another positive. Dirk had been there when she’d needed him. How many people could she say that of throughout her life so far?

  “You’re kidding! Dr. Kelley was Santa?” Danielle’s mouth dropped open. “Now I know I’m changing my Christmas wish list. You should have told me. I could have come and sat in his lap.”

  Um, no. If any grown-up had been going to sit in Dirk’s lap, Abby had dibs.

  “My Santa canceled very last minute and I couldn’t find a replacement. He saved me from canceling the event. Plus, he did a good job.” Abby laughed at her friend’s amazed expression. “Seriously, he did.”

  Mostly. He hadn’t seemed to enjoy himself, but he had stayed until every kid in line had gotten their time with Santa. Not every busy doctor would have given up so much of his free time.

  Okay, so he professed not to like Christmas. He was here at the Christmas party. He’d played Santa. Next thing you knew she’d have him out caroling or ringing bells for charity donations. Hey, it could happen. She was here with him, wasn’t she? He was taking her home, wasn’t he?

  As if sensing her gaze, Dirk looked up. Laser-blue fire flew from across the room, flooding her belly with the sensation of a curly Christmas ribbon having been stretched out and released.

  Wow, but the man packed a wallop.

  First saying something to the men he stood with, he headed toward her. Tall, handsome in his dark suit, his eyes solely trained on her, as if she were the only person in the room, the only person who mattered. His hand touched her elbow and her world shifted off its axis.

  “Hi, Dr. Kelley. Great party, huh?” Danielle smiled at Dirk, taking a sip of her wine.

  “I suppose.” Dirk’s gaze briefly touched on Danielle, but immediately returned to Abby. His eyes had the same look in them that he’d had at the “Pictures with Santa,” a rescue me, please one. He held her gaze, his thumb stroking over her bare arm. Did he realize he was doing that? Would he please stop? The more he touched, the more she wanted him to touch. Not good. Her bosses were all here!

  When she went to pull away
, his hand enveloped hers, clasping her fingers in his slightly clammy ones.

  Oblivious to Dirk’s discomfort, Danielle sent Abby an impressed look, smiled widely, then excused herself under the pretense of getting another glass of wine.

  “I’m not going to be able to stay much longer, Abby.”

  She nodded as if she understood, but she wasn’t exactly clear. Had he gotten a call from the hospital? Due to the party, they were operating on a skeleton staff. Both Dirk and Abby were on call, so it was a possibility. Although she couldn’t imagine why that would make him nervous.

  “I’m sorry.”

  “What are you sorry for?”

  “Not wanting to stay at the party you planned.”

  Work hadn’t called. He just didn’t want to be there. Abby bit the inside of her cheek, studying him.

  As his gaze skimmed over the Christmas decorations Abby had thought gave just the right touch, he winced. “If it were any other kind of party…”

  Than Christmas. He didn’t have to say the words.

  There was something about the way his eyes darkened, the way his body tensed, that had her squeezing his hand. She didn’t want to leave, but neither did she like the tortured expression in his eyes. “It’s okay. We can go whenever you like. Most of the good stuff has already taken place.”

  “Good stuff?” He focused on her face as if using her as a focal point to stay grounded.

  “When the administrators acknowledged all the hard work everyone does every day of the year, when they acknowledged what a great staff we have, and, of course, when they gave away the gifts donated by local businesses.”

  His expression not changing, he studied her. “Sorry you didn’t win.”

  “That’s okay.” She smiled up at him, feeling petite despite her four-inch heels.

  “You look like a winner.” His gaze raked over her Santa Claus red dress, pausing at where the waist dipped in before flaring out just above the knees.

  “Thank you.” She’d seen the dress, added the white wrap and the heels that were much more daring than anything she usually wore but couldn’t resist, and known she had the perfect Christmas party ensemble.

  She’d even splurged on new underwear. Not the granny whites like she usually wore. No, the tiny silk and lace garments beneath her dress kept up her Christmas red theme and made her feel less like that broken-down old toy and more like the shiny new one waiting to be played with under the Christmas tree.

  Just in case.

  As crazy as it was, she definitely wanted to relive all the things she and Dirk had done together, all the ways he’d touched her, kissed her, loved her body. She sighed in remembrance of the ways his hands and mouth had given her pleasure. So, so much pleasure.

  “What are you thinking about?”

  She glanced up, curious at the slight rasp to his voice. When her gaze collided with his, heat flushed her cheeks. She might not be able to read his mind, but he’d certainly read hers. He knew.

  Knew exactly what she’d been thinking. Remembering.

  It turned him on. Maybe as much as she was turned on. Could that be possible? Could he really feel the same?

  “Earlier, when you asked, I promised to dance before the evening ended.” His gaze never shifted from hers. “With you by my side, staying doesn’t feel quite so impossible. Dance with me, Abby, then we’ll go.”

  He was really going to dance with her? She’d already resigned herself that unless she danced with someone else, she wouldn’t be making her way onto the dance floor.

  Smiling, she let him lead her out. He took her into his arms and they swayed to the music in gentle rhythm.

  “You’re a good dancer.” She’d imagined he hadn’t wanted to dance because perhaps he couldn’t. She should have known better about that, too. Dirk Kelley was a man of many talents.

  “You sound surprised.” He almost smiled. “It’s been a while,” he admitted, endearing himself even further, “but I guess it’s like riding a bicycle. One of those things you don’t really forget how to do.”

  “Why has it been a while since you’ve danced?”

  Instantly, his arms stiffened.

  “I just don’t dance any more,” he finally said.

  Which wasn’t really much of an answer and left her with a dozen questions he obviously wouldn’t answer. Resisting a sigh, Abby laid her cheek against his chest, soaking in the warmth of being in his arms.

  They danced, slow and in sync, their bodies touching, brushing against each other, his body heat melting her like a marshmallow in hot chocolate. Dirk made no motion to leave when one song turned into another.

  “You smell good.” He nuzzled her lightly, brushing his cheek against her hair. “Like fresh berries and cinnamon.”

  “You smell good, too,” she admitted, amazed at her vocal cords’ ability to make coherent sounds when her entire insides shook like she’d been trampled by stampeding reindeer.

  “Are you having a good time?”

  Nodding, she laid her cheek against his shoulder. From the corner of her eye, she saw Danielle give a thumbs-up and a suggestive eyebrow waggle and shake of her hips. She also noticed several of their colleagues watching them. Some with curiosity. Some with smiles.

  A low, nervous chuckle rose up her throat.

  “What?” he asked in a low voice, near her ear.

  “Everyone thinks we’re a couple.”

  His feet stilled a moment, as if he’d forgotten where they were, but his hands stayed at her waist. “I don’t do couples, Abby.”

  She raised her head, stared at him. “Okay, we’re not a couple.” She took a deep breath. “What are we?”

  He hesitated, looking torn. “I’m not sure.”

  Not the answer she’d hoped to hear. Then again, what had she expected? Feed the man a little fudge and he wouldn’t be able to get enough of her?

  She couldn’t deal with his hot-cold attitude. Not and keep her sanity intact. Her heart intact.

  “Then maybe you should get sure before we go any further, Dirk.” Her heart banged against her rib cage in protest of her words. She wanted to go further. Lots further. But she wasn’t a fool and wouldn’t pretend to be one, not even for more time with Dirk. Regardless of how she felt, she deserved better than to be at his beck and call, available for comfort sex and Christmas parties. “I like you. A lot. But I don’t want to end up with a broken heart and if you’re not in this with me, then…” She shrugged. “Well, whatever this is needs to end now.”

  He studied her, his fingers splayed against her back, stroking over the material of her dress, possessively, distractingly. “I’d never hurt you, Abby.”

  “Not intentionally.” Why were tears pricking her eyes? Why did she feel as if he was going to tell her goodbye? Why did that hurt so much? Technically, tonight was their first date. She would not cry. “But if I’m not careful where you’re concerned, I will end up hurt.”

  Her heart protested it was way too late to start thinking about heart protection. She was crazy about Dirk. Way too crazy to walk away unscathed. Hadn’t she fought tears more than once that he’d immediately had regrets about making love to her?

  “You’re right.” He took a deep breath and she expected him to let her go, to push her away. Instead, his hands tightened at her waist, as if he wasn’t willing to let go, as if he clung to her for support. “I shouldn’t have asked you here tonight.”

  “Why did you?”

  “I didn’t want to be here alone.”

  Had he only asked because she was convenient? Because he’d known she’d say yes? She bit the inside of her lower lip to hold it steady. He’d not made any grand promises. All he’d done was ask her to attend a Christmas party with him. She’d been the one to attach all sorts of sentimental meaning to his invitation.

  Just as she’d attached all sorts of sentimental meaning to their morning together. Lord, she was a fool.

  “But mostly because I can’t quit thinking about you.”

&
nbsp; A soft moan escaped. That was more along the lines of what she wanted to hear. More along the lines of how she felt about him. Her breath caught, knotting in her throat.

  “About making love to you.” He shifted against her, holding her more closely, pressing the length of her body to his. “I want you, Abby. I haven’t stopped wanting you. Seeing you tonight, like this…” his gaze moved over the curve of her neck, her upswept hair “…touching you, I can’t help but want to make love to you even though I know I shouldn’t and you certainly shouldn’t let me. Because regardless of how much I want you, I was serious when I said I don’t do relationships.”

  “Why not?” She swallowed the knot, wondering at the raw emotions in his eyes. Emotions she wasn’t positive had only to do with her, emotions he’d rarely bared, if ever.

  He shook his head. “Not everyone wants the cozy Christmas fantasy of being part of a couple, Abby. That’s not what I want.”

  The pain in his voice overshadowed his words, words she was sure were chosen to alienate her emotionally, revealed so much more than what he said. Did he realize how much he’d just exposed to her? That he’d given her a glimpse inside him? A glimpse that undid any resolve she might have had to walk away.

  “What do you want?” She held his gaze, clinging to his shoulders to remain steady on her feet as she prepared to expose her heart. “Because I’m not asking for some cozy Christmas fantasy. I just want you. So much I forget to breathe when I look at you.”

  He inhaled sharply, closed his eyes.

  “Oh, Abs,” he whispered against her forehead, sounding tortured and pleased all in the same breath. His jaw flexed. His eyes darkened then closed again. When they opened, possession shone. Possession and something so primal and needy that desire swept through Abby. His eyes asked questions much more potent than any he could speak.

  She toyed with the soft hair at his nape, twirling the silky black strands around her finger, wondering if it was bad that she felt just as wrapped around his finger. “Will you take me home now, Dirk?”