by Emma Miller
She smiled down at the sleeping infant she wore in a baby sling made from dark green denim fabric. “This one seems to like being at the shop. He’s been sleeping like a lamb most of the afternoon. Maybe he’ll choose to be a woodworker like his father.”
“Danke,” Honor said.
Ruth was Hannah’s oldest daughter. Her husband, Eli, and his uncle Roman, along with several other Amish craftsmen, designed and built most of the furniture for sale here. Honor didn’t know Ruth as well as she did Rebecca or Leah, because Ruth was a little older, but she possessed the same vivid blue eyes and seemed as pleasant and helpful as her sisters.
Luke smiled. “A good choice for a man, if he does. Our Lord was a carpenter.”
The phone rang in the small office, and Ruth excused herself. “Just come and find me if you see something you like.”
Honor glanced at the clock on the wall behind the counter. “I hope the boys are behaving themselves.” They’d been good since they’d gotten in so much trouble over going out on the ice, but she wasn’t confident that they’d really reformed. “I’d hate to think that they were unruly for Katie. Maybe I should have brought one or two of them with us.”
“Nope. Today is just for us,” Luke said. “We need to pick out new bedroom furniture, and I promised you supper that you didn’t have to cook.”
“But the children... They can be a handful.”
He smiled and shook his head. “You worry too much. Ivy and Katie are there to help Greta. I doubt much gets past Ivy. She’s had experience with children for a lot of years. And Katie promised to bake ginger-boy cookies with them. They’ll love that.”
Honor grimaced, imagining her kitchen strewed with flour and dripping with molasses. “That’s what I’m afraid of.” But she smiled with him. Maybe she was being a worrywart. “It’s sweet of you to want to take me to supper,” she said. “But we don’t have to go out to eat. You’re going to enough expense, buying new furniture.” She hesitated and then said what she was thinking. “You know, I’m not even sure we need to be here. There’s nothing wrong with the bed and dressers I have now.”
“Nothing wrong other than that Silas bought them for you.” Luke glanced around to make certain that they were alone and then took her hand in his. “When we marry, I’ll be moving into Silas’s house, eating off his table—”
“Ne, that’s my grandmother’s table. She left it to me. The tall maple dresser in my bedroom was hers, too. You haven’t seen that, but it’s lovely. I’d hate to part with it.”
“Let me finish,” he said gently. “I don’t really care where the table came from. It’s a nice table. But, Honor...” He hesitated a moment and then went on. “The truth is that a man doesn’t like the idea of another man’s bed. I’m buying us a new one. After we’re married, you can move the old one into one of the children’s rooms, sell it or give it away. And you can certainly keep your grandmother’s maple dresser for your clothes, but we need our own bed. Can you understand that?”
“Ya.” She nodded, liking the feel of his hand holding hers. But they weren’t Englishers. Hand-holding in public wasn’t something they did. She slipped her fingers out of his. “It’s just the cost I was thinking of.”
“Don’t worry about the cost. I told you, I have substantial savings, and I also have the inheritance my uncle left me. This is what I’ve been saving my money for all these years. For you, Honor. For us.”
She met his gaze and was so touched that she feared she might tear up. She loved that Luke felt so strongly that they belonged together. That he was so sure about this marriage. It helped her work through her own doubts.
Luke walked over to examine a queen-size oak bedstead. “What do you think of this style?”
“Umm, nice,” she said noncommittally. She had to admit that the thought of new furniture was a little bit exciting, but it was troublesome, as well.
Silas had always taken care that she knew how carefully he watched his money. He’d said she was too young to realize the value of it, especially since he was the one earning the income.
Only once could she remember arguing with him over money. She’d bought a cookie jar at Byler’s, a silly thing shaped like a fat hen. The children had seen it and loved it, and since the holidays were approaching, she’d used part of her grocery allowance to buy it. Silas had made her return it, saying that it was an irresponsible purchase. But had it been an irresponsible purchase? She didn’t think so. The cookie jar had made her laugh. And it had made her children happy. Couldn’t money be used sometimes to bring happiness to the ones you loved?
Once she married, she would spend the rest of her married life obeying another man’s wishes. At least now, if she wanted to make a foolish purchase with her own money, she could. Luke didn’t seem to be miserly with his money, but what if she was misreading him?
Suddenly, marriage to Luke was a reality. It had all happened so fast. She loved him, certainly, but...she hoped she wouldn’t live to regret her decision.
A woman should be married. Everyone said so; the church said so. It was the natural order of things. And doubly so for a woman with children. The incident on the ice had proved that, hadn’t it? She couldn’t care for her children properly alone. Her judgment wasn’t always the best.
“Honor?”
“Ya?” She glanced up at him and realized that he’d walked a few yards away to inspect a heavier bed with pineapples carved on the top of the posts. It was pretty, but probably more expensive than the first, plainer one. “Sorry, I was thinking about something.”
“I can see that.” He smiled at her. “Have you thought about what I asked you earlier? About going away for a honeymoon?”
“I don’t know, Luke.”
“We could go wherever you like,” he said. “Maybe out West or to Florida. I’ve never seen palm trees, and it’s a lot warmer there. We could go in the ocean.”
It all sounded like a wonderful idea, but she knew he wouldn’t want to take four children on his honeymoon, and she certainly couldn’t leave them. She’d worry herself sick about them. And what would they think? That she’d abandoned them? It would be difficult enough for them to get used to having a new father, someone they would have to obey, without upsetting their daily routine by her taking a trip. “I don’t think that would be a good idea. Not right away.” She hedged. “I think it’s best if we all stay at home and get settled in.”
Luke ran his hand over the carving on the bedpost. “Most couples do go away for a few days after their marriage.”
She pretended to look at the matching dresser. “Most couples don’t already have four children. You didn’t expect to take them with us, did you?”
“On our honeymoon?” He chuckled. “Definitely not. What I was hoping for was time alone with you.”
“If you take me, you have to accept them, as well.”
“Isn’t that what I’ve been saying all along?” He moved closer and took her hand again. “Honor, it doesn’t make me a bad father because I want to be alone for a few days with my bride. But if you think it isn’t a good idea, I’ll accept that. For now. But later, maybe in the summer, once I have the crops in the ground, we’ll go somewhere, just the two of us. I’ll hire a driver. We could go to Niagara Falls or even out to Kansas. Lots of people have been volunteering to watch our kids, and you know Katie and Freeman would take good care of them.”
“I know they would, but...” She sighed. She didn’t know what was wrong with her. The last three months with Luke had been the happiest, best weeks of her life. Why couldn’t she just accept God’s gift of Luke, and the happiness he brought her and her children, and enjoy it? Why was she second-guessing herself? “It’s not something we have to decide today, is it?”
She was feeling a little overwhelmed. It seemed there were so many decisions to make all at once. Luke had insisted on taking her out today and choosing furnitu
re when she had so much to do at home. Her wedding clothes were cut out and waiting to be stitched up. And Sara wanted her to come by and help her decide what they would serve for the wedding supper.
Aunt Martha had wanted to visit this afternoon, and Honor had had to tell her that she wouldn’t be home because she and Luke were going to town. In a way, Honor was glad to have an excuse. Aunt Martha had let everyone in the county know that she thought Honor was rushing into a marriage with a less-than-suitable man, and Honor was sure that she was only coming to try to get her to change her mind. Martha had been one of her mother’s best friends, and Honor respected her for that. She didn’t want to be rude, but the older woman was wrong about Luke. He was a good man, and Honor loved him. She was going to marry him, and that was that. But having Aunt Martha to deal with when she was already at her wit’s end only added icing to the cake.
“So, which set do you like best?” Luke asked, walking away to stand back and have another look at the furniture. “There’s the oak one over there, but I’m not crazy about the low dresser with the mirror.”
She sighed. “I don’t know. Whichever one you want,” Honor said.
He shook his head. “Ne, love. It’s for you to choose. I want to make you happy.”
That made her smile. “I know that, I just...” She didn’t finish her sentence because she didn’t know how to articulate what she was feeling. It was almost as if she was afraid this was all too good to be true.
He stood there, looking at her for a moment. “It is a little scary, isn’t it? The wedding?” he said, almost seeming to know what she was thinking. “Making such big changes in our lives. But Freeman says everybody feels the same way.” He folded his arms across his chest. “Now, please pick out a bedroom set for us, unless you don’t like any of them.” He shrugged. “And then we can go somewhere else. I just thought we’d get the best quality coming here.”
“No, no, these pieces are beautiful and sturdy and... I like the one with the pineapples,” she admitted.
“Me, too. That’s my favorite. Will there be room for the tall dresser if we keep the one you already have?”
“Ya.” She nodded. “It’s a big room.”
“Goot. So, we’ll take the bed, the side tables and the dresser, and I’ll make arrangements to have them delivered out to the farm.” He pointed in the direction of the office where Ruth had gone. “Let me pay for them, and then we’ll have our driver take us to the mall.”
“I thought we were going to supper.”
“We are, but first, we need to go somewhere to buy sheets, blankets, towels, that kind of stuff.”
She smiled at him as she traced the lines of the pineapple on a foot post with her index finger. “Are you sure? This is going to be a very expensive day.”
“You’re worth it,” he assured her.
“I hope so,” she replied, looking up at him. “Because once we’re married, it will be for keeps.”
* * *
The waitress, a teenager with a brown ponytail, brought their orders and put them on the table. “Be careful,” she warned cheerfully. “Everything’s hot.” She balanced her tray expertly on one hip and removed two glasses of iced tea. “Anything else I can get you?”
“No, thank you,” Luke said.
Honor looked down at her supper. It smelled delicious. The special tonight at Hall’s restaurant was meat loaf and boiled potatoes. She’d chosen collards and green beans to go with it. This had turned out to be a wonderful afternoon. After she’d gotten over her nervousness at picking out the furniture, she and Luke had walked around the mall and bought crisp white sheets and a beautiful blue comforter for their bed, as well as some new towels.
This was really happening.
She was marrying Luke, and nothing would be like it had been in her first marriage. The shopping trip was proof of that. The first time that she was married, the only new things they got for their house were gifts given to her. Everything else was a hand-me-down. Not that there was anything wrong with perfectly good used household items, but a young girl just settling into her first house with her new husband takes great pride in her housewifery skills, and a set of new dish towels or a fresh broom can go a long way to making a house a home.
“Grace?” Luke said quietly and surprised her by reaching across the small table and taking her hands in his.
She inhaled sharply and glanced around to see if people were looking at them. But the other diners were all busy with their own conversations. No one was staring at them. Their driver, Jerry, was seated at a booth near the side door with his wife, Jan, and there was even another Amish couple at another table. Hall’s was a neighborhood restaurant in a small town where locals came for traditional food and friendly service. She could feel at ease here, even if most of the people were Englishers.
Honor bowed her head for silent prayer. She knew that her thoughts should be on giving thanks to God for all His blessings, and especially for this meal, but it was difficult to focus when she was so conscious of Luke’s touch and the tingling that ran up her arms.
When he opened his eyes, he looked directly into hers and smiled. “It’s been a good day, hasn’t it?”
“It has,” she answered truthfully. Excitement bubbled through her and she found that she was starving. She brought a forkful of the meat loaf to her lips and tasted it. “Mmm. Just as good as I remembered. I’d like to have the recipe, but the cook won’t give it out.”
“Maybe I should bring you here every week,” Luke teased.
She chuckled. “Not every week, but now and then. They don’t have meat loaf all the time, but they do make a good liver and onions.”
He made a face. “Not on my list of favorites.”
“Ne? And I was planning on cooking it every Monday evening.” She chuckled at his expression. “Just teasing. The children don’t like it, either.”
“Then I’m saved.” He smiled at her as he buttered his roll. “Are you happy with the furniture we picked out?”
“I am. I’m glad we liked the same set.” She couldn’t stop looking at him. He was so solid, so handsome, so full of life that it was almost too good to be true that he wanted to be her husband and the father of her children.
In many ways, this was the Luke she’d loved as a girl, but there was something more about him. He was stronger, steadier, and seemed to glow with an inner enthusiasm whether he was opening a hymnal or tackling a tough task in the field. How foolish she’d been to resist his courting. This was truly the man God had planned for her.
“At least we agree on something,” Luke said. She must have looked confused, because he quickly added, “The bedroom suite. We both like pineapples.” He chuckled, and they laughed together.
She tasted the collards. They were tender and seasoned perfectly. “It was nice of you to buy the new things at the mall,” she told him. “My sheets were getting shabby.”
“After we’re married, we’ll open a joint bank account with my savings,” Luke said. “You can write a check for anything you need for yourself or for our household. And whatever Silas left you is yours, for your children or for your security. I don’t want any of it.”
“That’s kind of you,” she replied.
“Not kind,” he said. “Fair. You should have security, in case I should die or become...”
She put down her fork. “Don’t say such a thing.”
“It’s possible. Farming accidents happen. Illnesses happen, Honor. I want to be certain that you will be cared for, no matter what comes.”
She shook her head. “For that, we must trust in God.” She smiled at him. “But this was supposed to be our night out. Can’t you think of anything more pleasant to talk about than you dying?”
He reached out and patted her hand. “We can talk about anything you’d like, or we can just sit here and eat and I can look at you.”
; “Don’t say such things,” she whispered, feeling her cheeks grow warm. But secretly it pleased her. It had been a long time since she’d felt pretty or that a man cared about what she wanted or what she thought. How easy it was to forget the years that she’d resented him and remember the good times they’d had together, the laughter and the fun.
Luke began to talk about the wedding, and she found that, despite her nervousness, she was looking forward to the day. She wished that her children could be part of the celebration, but by custom, the wedding would be just for adults. Friends would care for them until the following day. She hoped the kids would understand. The marriage ceremony was a serious ritual, and she needed to give all her attention to the words of the bishop and the preachers, and, of course, to Luke.
“You haven’t met my cousin Raymond, but you’ll like him and his wife. They’re coming to the wedding because I want you to meet them. They have two children. The oldest is six, I believe. Anyway, work has been slow for Raymond in Kansas. He’s thinking of moving his family here. He’d like to raise goats for meat and for milk. His wife makes the best cheese.” Luke took a mouthful of potatoes and chewed slowly. “I was wondering if you might be interested in selling them that acreage on the far side of the road. I can’t think that we’ll ever need it, and you said you’d wondered if you should sell it. The fields are in good pasture, perfect for a dairy operation. What do you think?”
She looked up in surprise. “I don’t know. Do you think they’d want to be so far from Dover and the other Amish communities?”
Luke leaned forward, his expression enthusiastic. “I don’t because here’s why. I was thinking that one way to fix the problem of being so far from your Amish community is to attract more young Amish families out to where we are. Raymond has an unmarried sister who’s been teaching school for three years. If he moves, she’ll come with him. Our children need a school nearby. Tanner really should have started first grade last fall.”