One More Thing

by Lilliana Anderson

  19

  Sunday, 25th December 2016

  MY PHONE BUZZED in my hand at 12:05. I’d been reading an e-book after playing Santa for Ty. He would wake up to a stocking on his door and presents under the tree, and all the adults in the house would watch on and remember how magical Christmas once was. Christmas Day needed children in it.

  Jude: Merry Christmas, gorgeous xx

  I smiled and started typing a reply before deleting it and hitting the call button instead. I wanted to hear his voice.

  “Hey,” he answered, the sound of a smile in his voice.

  “Merry Christmas to you too.”

  “I wanted to be the first one to say it to you.”

  “You were. I’m glad you’re still up.” I nestled into my pillows, getting comfortable in the double bed I used to sleep in as a girl.

  “Is that so?”

  “I missed the sound of your voice. I was so busy today that I didn’t get time to call you.”

  “That’s OK. I know you’re with family. Is Ty excited for the morning?”

  “He is. He wanted to go to bed at four in the afternoon so Christmas would come faster.”

  Jude chuckled. “He’s a funny kid. I actually bought him a gift. I hope that’s OK. I won’t give it to him if you don’t think it’s appropriate.”

  “You did? Wow, he’ll love that. He told me that you’re his favourite grown-up. You’ve made quite the impression.”

  “He has good taste,” he joked.

  “My mum was asking after you.”

  “You told her about me?”

  “She said she could see it on my face.”

  “She could see me on your face? That’s a talent.”

  I laughed. “She knew I’d met someone because I seemed happy.”

  “So, you’re saying that I make you happy?”

  “Yes. You make me very happy.”

  He didn’t respond with words, just a small sound of acknowledgement. I wondered if I’d perhaps overstepped the mark somehow. Nerves skittered about in my chest so I changed the topic to push the feeling aside.

  “What are your plans tomorrow?”

  He took a deep breath and I could hear his movement against his sheets. “I’m expected at my stepmum’s around eleven.”

  “Do you have a big lunch planned?”

  He made a noise that sounded something like huffing air from his nose. “Something like that.”

  “Something is telling me that Christmas isn’t really your favourite time of year.”

  A beat or two passed before he answered. “Let’s just say that I’d rather be spending a lazy Sunday in bed with you.”

  “Give it about fifteen years and we’ll actually get the chance to do that,” I said with a laugh before catching myself. Talking that far into the future this early in a relationship was a big no-no. “I didn’t mean that you have to stay with me for fifteen years… It’s just now with Ty, I can’t lie in bed all day… I’m sorry, I’m not trying to pressure you.” I closed my eyes, my stomach tightening. I was terrible at this dating thing.

  “You don’t want me to be with you in fifteen years?”

  “Honestly, I struggle to imagine my life in fifteen years. I just know that I want you with me now and that whenever I do think about the future, I imagine you in it.”

  “Me too,” he replied, his voice sounding far away. He fell quiet and I waited on the other end of the line, listening to that quiet and growing concerned that something wasn’t quite right.

  “Is everything OK, Jude?” I asked when the conversation didn’t continue.

  “I’m just not looking forward to tomorrow. I mean, today; later.”

  “Do you want to talk about it?”

  “Not particularly.”

  “Is there anything I can do?”

  “Just stay on the line with me. I’m lonely without you.”

  “Me too. I miss you in my bed.”

  “I miss your smell.”

  I took a deep breath, my skin tingling as I imagined him beside me. “I miss your hands.”

  “I miss your mouth.” His voice grew thick and husky.

  “I miss your tongue.” I shifted slightly in bed, pressing my knees together.

  “I miss your taste.”

  “I miss wrapping my legs around you.”

  He groaned, his breathing growing heavier. “I miss pushing inside you.”

  I could feel the arousal pooling between my legs. “I miss you inside me.”

  “I miss listening to your moans.”

  I moaned a little, getting more turned on with each passing second.

  “Yes. Just like that. Will you moan for me, Sarah? Touch yourself. Imagine it’s me.”

  Biting my lip, I shifted to a better position in the bed. “You too. I want to hear what I do to you.”

  A sound escaped his lips that was so erotic, I felt it between my legs. “You want to know what you do? You make me insanely hard, Sarah. I want you constantly.”

  Releasing a tiny whimper, I slid my hand down my body, slipping it beneath the waistband of my panties. “It’s like silk, Jude.”

  “Is your clit hard?”

  Gliding my finger through my juices, I touched the firm and throbbing bump, making a humming sound as I whispered, “Yes.”

  “Keep going. I want to hear you so I can pretend I’m with you.”

  Closing my eyes, I focused on the sound of his breathing, imagining that it was his fingers doing things to me, sliding in and out, circling my clit, teasing my entrance. I could hear his moans on the other end of the line, knowing he was touching himself and imagining it was me. It pushed me over the edge, my moans getting louder as my climax drew nearer.

  “Oh Jude,” I gasped, coming against my hand, my clit pulsing against my fingertips.

  “Holy fuck. Sarah,” he moaned less than a second later.

  Letting out my breath, I relaxed into my pillow, satisfied and loving the sound of him coming undone.

  There was just one very important thing missing. “I miss lying in your arms, Jude.”

  “I miss holding you,” he replied.

  “I want you here. With me.”

  “I want that too.”

  “Would it be too much to ask you to come here? To the farm?”

  “I can leave on Boxing Day. I’ll leave at first light.” He didn’t even hesitate. Happy Christmas to me.

  Lying in bed the next morning, I could hear Ty awake, excited because Santa had come. He was running around the house waking all the grown-ups. I’d been his first port of call and while he woke everyone else, I took a moment to stare at my bracelet and remember the day I got it—the first Christmas I spent with Tyler. We’d only had two. The first was directly after a relapse when I realised he was sick. I hadn’t known what it was at the time, and he still hadn’t been willing to tell me. But we’d spent the day in bed, making love and promising ourselves to each other. The second was the month before he died, when he was too sick to get out of bed and too melancholy for any sort of gift exchange. I sat with him all day and we’d watched Christmas movies, pretending that everything was normal even though I had to help him eat. Our relationship had been far from perfect. It was fraught with ups and downs, filled with secrets and unshared truths. Despite all that was difficult, loving him had been easy. There wasn’t a single moment where I questioned the strength of feeling between us, not a single moment where I wanted to turn away.

  Until recently, I hadn’t thought it would be possible to feel that sure about somebody again. But I knew that I was feeling it again now with Jude. It was different. I was different. I was older and had matured to the point where I wasn’t quite as desperate as I had been the last time. I didn’t feel as though I couldn’t breathe if he wasn’t around. My world didn’t just revolve around me and my desires anymore. But I still needed him, and better still, I wanted him. That was important to me. I felt that this thing with Jude was a choice; one I was glad to make. Wise to make.
>
  I was sure about Jude. What was between us had developed quickly, but that didn’t make it any less. It was as if he had been perfectly designed for me then plopped down into the world, directly in my path so I was forced to find him. He entered my life when I needed him. He helped to heal my wounds. He made me realise that I was ready.

  I was ready to fall in love again.

  “Come on, Mummy!” Ty burst into my room, snapping me out of my musings. “Even Uncle Ha-we is up.”

  With a smile, I touched my bracelet lovingly then got out of bed, sweeping my precious little golden boy up in my arms. “Well, if Uncle Harry is awake then I hope Grandma has the coffee on. He’s grumpy in the morning without it.” I made a grumpy face to mimic my brother.

  Ty giggled and I bopped him on the nose.

  “Ho, Ho, Ho,” a voice boomed from somewhere in the house.

  Ty’s eyes lit up.

  “Looks like Grandad is ready to play Santa. You want to see what’s inside your presents?”

  With a grin wider than his face, he nodded.

  “Then let’s go.”

  20

  Monday, 26th December 2016

  “SOMEONE’S HERE,” TY gasped, jumping down from the kitchen table where he had been making animals out of play dough while wearing the safari hat my brother had given him for Christmas. He also received a set of binoculars and grabbed them, pressing them against the window so he could look outside. “It’s Jude!”

  Ty tore out of the house as fast as his legs could carry him and ran at Jude who caught him mid-air. It was only nine thirty in the morning. Jude must have driven through the night to get here by now.

  “That’s quite the welcome,” Mum said, watching through the window.

  Nodding, I ran my hands over my hair and straightened the skirt of my summer dress, preening, because I was suddenly nervous. Jude was meeting my family. I’d never done anything like this before. Even with Tyler. Things between us had tumbled along so haphazardly that we’d never found time for nor needed formalities.

  “Relax, Sarah. He drove all this way for you.”

  “I know. I don’t know why I’m so nervous.” I could actually feel my hands shaking.

  “You like him. You want us to like him too. If Ty’s reaction is anything to go by, we’re going to love him.” Then she nodded her head toward the door, urging me to go outside too.

  I smiled and went for the door as fast as I could without running. I was giddy with excitement, which was silly because we’d only been apart for a few days. But I wanted to see him. My days were better when he was in them.

  He wrapped me in his arms and spun me in a circle, burying his face in my neck as a greeting. I laughed and held on, kissing him passionately as he lowered me to the ground.

  “That made every hour of that long drive worth it.” Jude gazed into my eyes and smiled. He looked tired. “I missed you far too much for the short time we’ve been apart.”

  I took hold of his hand. “Me too.”

  Looking down, I saw the joyous smile on Ty’s face. It was the first time he’d seen Jude and I kiss since we started dating. We’d kept everything very G-rated around him until now. He looked as though it was Christmas morning again.

  “Did Santa come yesterday?” Jude asked.

  Ty nodded then started rattling off the things he got, miming their actions, talking a mile a minute.

  “That sounds like a lot. Do you think you can handle one more gift?” Jude asked when he was done.

  “Weally?” Ty’s eyes grew wide.

  “Really.” Jude opened the boot of his car and pulled out a wrapped box.

  Ty took it and dropped to the ground where we stood, tearing at the paper then opening the box. Inside, there was a kid’s book about Africa as well as a collection of lifelike toy animals. “Wow,” Ty exclaimed, pulling out the giraffe and the tiger and pretending one was hunting the other.

  “Looks like you’re all set for safari now,” Jude said, tapping the rim of the hat Ty was wearing.

  “Thank you,” Ty yelled, wrapping himself around Jude’s leg.

  “You’re very welcome.” Jude watched as Ty collected his things in his arms then ran back into the house, shouting for his grandmother to see what Jude got him.

  “I think he likes it.”

  “I’m glad,” Jude said, bending down to scoop up the paper and box, putting them back in the boot of his car. “Are you sure it’s fine with your parents that I stay here? I can always get a room in town.”

  “It’s fine. In fact, it was my mother’s idea. She wanted to meet you because I made you sound so awesome.”

  “All lies, I’m sure.” He grinned then grabbed the handle of a gym bag full of his things.

  I looped my arm in his. “Come inside, I’ll introduce you to Mum. You can meet my dad and brother a little later. They’re moving the cows to a new paddock after milking this morning. They should be done before lunch.”

  “So this is a literal working dairy farm?”

  “Sure is. What, you didn’t believe me?”

  “I did. I guess, I just didn’t—”

  “Believe me,” I finished for him, laughing.

  He shrugged. “I seriously don’t know what I thought.”

  When we got inside, Mum was wearing a fresh coat of lipstick and had brushed her hair. She’d been preening as well. I smiled, feeling that the apple obviously didn’t fall far from the tree between her and me.

  “Mum, I’d like you to meet Jude Baker. Jude, this is my mother, Moira Kennedy.”

  Mum held out her hand and smiled when Jude said, “It’s lovely to meet you, Moira,” and kissed her on the hand.

  My mother took her hand back and said, “Enchanté,” while blushing furiously.

  Ty giggled. And I tried not to laugh at the exchange; it was like the royal family had come to tea and everyone had lost their minds.

  “Let me show you where to put your bag,” I said, grabbing Jude by the arm and leading him down the hall to my bedroom before things could get any stranger.

  He dropped backwards, lying sideways on the double bed and held his hands against his temples, groaning. “What the hell was that?”

  I slid on the bed beside him, leaning with my forearms across his chest and giggled. “Enchanté.”

  He laughed. “I was so nervous, she held out her hand so I kissed it. What the hell was that?”

  I was giggling so hard that I was kicking my legs. “She thinks you’re dreamy.” I thought it adorable that he’d been so nervous meeting my mother. She was the most easy-going person on the planet, but I thought it beautiful that they’d both shown nerves during their first meeting. It showed how much they cared about me. I couldn’t stop smiling.

  “You spend all this time worrying about first impressions then it turns into something out of a Jane Austen novel. I’m surprised I didn’t bow.”

  “I’m surprised she didn’t curtsey. I think you’re being too hard on yourself.”

  His hands slid around my waist. “You only get one first impression.”

  “And from the way she was blushing, you made a wonderful one.”

  He looked into my eyes and smiled. “It’s the accent, I get away with a lot of shit because of it.”

  “And she thinks you’re pretty special because you’re an academic lecturing at the university. She was worried you’d think she was too common.”

  “Ha. If only she knew. I come from very humble roots.”

  “Do you? You haven’t really told me.”

  A smile played on his lips as he lifted his hand and brushed my curls back from my face.

  “How was your Christmas?” he asked, deflecting.

  “Full of food and a noisy four-year-old. How was yours?”

  “Long,” he responded. “I didn’t get home until midnight.”

  “Midnight? That must have been some party.”

  “I wish.” He laughed, but there was no joy in it. He seemed more focused on running his
fingers through my hair.

  “Did something happen?”

  He shook his head. “Just a long day. Yours sounds like it was fun.”

  “It was. Ty was so excited when he woke up to all the presents.”

  Pulling his glasses off his eyes, I ran my fingers across his brow, noting the dark circles under his eyes. “Did you sleep, at least? I’d hate for you to have driven all that way without sleeping first. I’m not worth risking your life over.”

  “I slept a little. I just left early. The roads were quiet.”

  Looking into his eyes, I wasn’t sure that he was giving me the whole story. There was something he wasn’t telling me and he was being purposely evasive because of it.

  “Did something happen, Jude? With your family?”

  He shook his head. “I adore your hair,” he deflected again, running his fingers along its length. The curls loosened then sprang back into place.

  “What if it fell out and I was bald?” I asked, hoping he’d tell me whatever was on his mind when he was ready. It was a little concerning that he wasn’t opening up to me when he’d basically insisted that I be an open book. But then, he’d driven here to see me, so I knew I was important to him. I’d just have to wait and trust.

  “I adore the woman attached to it even more. So I think I’d be fine.”

  “Good answer.” I leaned down and kissed him, enjoying the feel of his mouth on mine. I forced myself to pull back as the kiss deepened, knowing we were expected back in the living area soon. “Can I tell you something?”

  “Anything.”

  “This is kind of a big deal for me.”

  “My being here?”

  I nodded. “I’ve never brought a man home to meet my parents before. It’s new territory for all of us. So we’re all a bit nervous.”

  “Not even your husband?”

  “No. Tyler grew up around here so my parents already knew him. We were very on and off in the beginning so they didn’t really have much to do with him until the wedding. And after that, things spiralled so fast that we didn’t do any of the traditional family get-togethers.”

  He nodded. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  “I’m just saying to go easy on everyone—including yourself. This is new territory for all of us.”

  Sitting up, he kissed me again, hands on either side of my face, breathing me in as his mouth caressed my soul. I felt light-headed when he released me and had to place a hand on his chest to steady myself.