It was inevitable that we’d part, but with the blood bond, we’d always be connected. As her pace quickened, the intensity rose. I had to have her, all of her. I pulled my lips from hers and extended my fangs, bearing down on the soft flesh of her neck for a taste to feed my addiction with another quick taste. Her flavor covered my tongue. That warm blood, as rich and sweet as the finest Italian wine. Delizioso.
Her movements turned wild and frantic before she shuddered, pulsing around me. My name escaped her lips, part sigh and part gasp. She climaxed, and I shot up to the highest of peaks. As I exploded into her, the cage that covered my heart opened a bit wider. Not only had I offered my blood, but perhaps a part of my soul.
Mia
Renato left my room before dawn. I couldn’t move. My legs were jelly, and I was spent. I never knew my body could feel that way.
But then again, I’d never met anyone like Renato.
He’d given me some of his blood. That meant we’d be connected in some vampire way I didn’t entirely understand, but it comforted me. Even after I left, we’d still have this bond.
The practical side of me snapped awake. I couldn’t just laze around in bed, reliving all the incredible moments of the night. Not when I had fresh vampire blood in my system. I needed to get a sample and compare it to one I’d taken prior to ingesting his blood. I pulled a medical kit that I’d stashed with my school supplies. After the initial search when James had taken the holy water, Renato no longer frisked me. Besides, as a premed student, it wouldn’t stand out as odd. They wouldn’t know what I needed in a lab.
I fastened the rubber strap around my arm and inserted the needle, filling the syringe.
The sound of a knock startled me. Renato opened the door a moment later.
Our eyes locked, his filled with shock, mine undoubtedly filled with guilt. A moment later, his expression turned hard, eyes blazing with accusation.
“What the hell are you doing, Mia?”
I yanked out the needle, causing pain in my haste.
“I can explain.”
The hell I could. Oh my God, this couldn’t be happening. He’d never understand.
“Good. Because I’d like to hear this story.”
The venom in his voice made me shiver. How could the same voice that could make me melt with its sensuality turn so cold?
I slapped a bandage on my arm. No need to have blood dripping down my arm in front of a pissed off vampire, especially when it glared as an obvious sign of my wrongdoing.
Shuffling my feet, I stared at the pattern in the opulent blue Oriental rug. “I took a sample of my blood.”
“I can see that,” he spat.
He gave me a hard stare, an unspoken demand for a better explanation.
“I want to study it.”
“Why?”
Even that one word projected such accusation, it was a wonder. I still wasn’t sure what Renato did for business, but I’d never want to be an adversary across from him in a boardroom. As it was, I’d turned into one in a bedroom.
“My mother—” I began and then stopped.
“Your mother what?”
Every cell in my body rebelled at telling this story. I twisted my mother’s sapphire ring around my finger three times. It was one of the compulsions I’d developed when my mother was sick. Something I told myself I had to do to save her. It didn’t work. Still, the compulsions stuck.
“My mother,” I repeated. “She died.”
Renato
Mia twisted her ring, a sure sign of her discomfort.
“How?” I prodded.
“I don’t want to talk about this.”
The catch in Mia’s voice tore at me, but it didn’t explain anything. After what I’d seen, I wasn’t letting her off so easy. She’d had secrets from the beginning. I’d been a fool not to push her for answers sooner, falling for her like some damn buffoon. But I wasn’t going to continue doing so now.
Whatever her reasoning, it clawed at me. I had to know. What would drive her into the role to be a plaything for my kind?
“Why did you become a blood courtesan anyway? Was it all for the money?”
My question came out as a harsh accusation. She reacted with a startled, pained look. I was such a stronzo.
Better an asshole than playing the damn fool.
“Partially. But not all.” She recovered from my direct verbal assault, raising her chin and staring at me in a valiant attempt not to back down. I’d seen her do it many times over the course of our arrangement, and it had amused me. But now, it was dead on real. A fight was on the brink, and I sensed it would turn ugly.
What was the rest of the story, and the bigger question—why did I even care? She had some agenda that had me playing a role I wasn’t aware of.
Which was why I surprised myself by asking the next question, trying not to bark it out this time. “What are the other reasons?”
The gentler tone helped.
She took a deep breath and exhaled. “My mother was suffering from a rare blood ailment, wasting away. Throughout my teens, I watched her disintegrate. We took her for many tests, trying to figure out the cause. It was agonizing to watch, all her vibrancy seemed to fade, like a photograph neglected in the sunlight. But she wasn’t neglected. I was there with her. All the doctors did everything to try to save her. But it was hopeless.”
“It was just the two of you? What about your father?”
She shook her head. “Never met him. He wasn’t part of our lives. He doesn’t matter.”
Ah, another absentee father. Something I knew about all too well.
“My mother’s condition worsened, and the doctors couldn’t do anything to prevent it. I knew she was dying, but couldn’t do anything to stop it. But I had to do something. She was my mother. I couldn’t just let her suffer like that. I convinced myself that I could help her. I knew her better than anyone. If I could better understand the problem, I could come up with a way to treat it. It’s ridiculous, I know. If the top medical doctors couldn’t help her, how could I? But still, I learned everything I could about blood. It turned into an obsession. But, it’s life. It’s everything.”
As a vampire, I understood that completely, yet I didn’t dare interrupt until I heard everything.
“And then, on the way to yet another test, it all went to hell. We were in a car accident. I was driving. Someone ran a stop sign and hit us. We were both injured, but my mother had it the worst. The brunt of the impact was on her side of the car. She had so many injuries. The blood. So much blood was leaving her body. I struggled to try to stop it, covering it while we waited for help to arrive. She was moaning, in and out of consciousness. I tried to comfort her as we waited for the paramedics to arrive.”
When Mia closed her eyes, I sensed she was reliving the incident. She reopened them and stated in a flat tone, “It was too late. She died in my arms. Her blood flowed over me, and with it her life.” She shook her head as her face appeared to crumble. “I couldn’t save her.”
In that moment, I was moved more than I could remember in decades. My life had consisted of pursuing vengeance for so long that when I felt the way I did now, actually felt, it seemed like that steel gate that protected my soul had been pried open a few more inches, despite what I perceived as a betrayal. It had been so long since I’d experienced any sort of emotion of that kind, that compassion for another being. Part of it was our blood bond, which had awakened me with a new light since I’d connected with her. Another part was something deeper. I cared for her—more than I’d ever remembered feeling for another person.
She fixed her eyes on me with a determined look. “I admit I’m still fascinated with every facet of blood—components, diseases, coagulation, everything about it. And that led to vampires. After all, who would understand the life force of blood better? It keeps you immortal.”
That was true. As a vampire, I thought about blood the way humans thought about food or sex—often. With greed and hunger.
&
nbsp; Although her story tore at me, I had to remember what I’d caught her doing. I’d been nothing but a means to an end for her. It was hypocritical considering I’d paid for her—using her—but it didn’t diminish the pain. It was raw and ripped through me as sharp as claws slicing through my gut. Letting her slip under my skin had been a mistake. I had been hardened for so long for a reason. It protected me against being hurt. I had to slam the gate shut to stop this torment ripping through me.
“So, you were using me.”
“No.” She shook her head. “Well, yes, in a way. But I didn’t steal your blood while you were sleeping or anything like that. Or take your blood against your will.”
“Let’s not go there. You know full well you’d asked for my blood right from the beginning. Now I know why. You misled me.”
“How?” She spread her arms to the side. “You paid for a service—my body and blood. I gave it to you.” Her eyes widened with incredulity. “If there’s anyone who should complain about being used, it should be me.”
My insides churned as the conflict in my brain intensified. Racing thoughts. Betrayal. Compassion. Love.
Merda. Love. No, don’t think of that now. Not at the worst possible moment.
“It was more than that, Mia. You know my rule. I’ve had you here longer than any courtesan in the past.”
“Oh, what an honor.” Her voice dripped with sarcasm. “Instead of three nights, I was contracted for fourteen. All the other courtesans will be witch green with envy.”
“Do you have to be so flippant?”
She tore her gaze away. “Why do my actions matter to a vampire who only exists to feed and fuck, and only exists by feeding and fucking, as you so eloquently put it to me earlier? All I am to you is another goddamn provider.”
I stepped up to her and grabbed her shoulders. “Look at me.” She resisted, avoiding eye contact, but finally relented. “Can't you see I’ve grown feelings for you? And how much this is killing me? I was nothing to you but a means to an end.”
A sigh escaped her. “Renato, I, uh—” She closed her eyes and reopened them. “You were never that. I had my reasons for becoming a blood courtesan, but every moment I’ve spent with you has drawn me from those intentions. I’ve always focused on my goals, my future, but with you, it’s been different. Distracting. In a good way.”
“How?”
“Finding happiness by living in the moment. Not always worried about the future. Even knowing I’m one of many and it will leave me hurt in the end—I’ve fallen for you.”
She cared for me. All the turmoil within vanished for a moment as her declaration spread through me, warming me like sunlight, which I hadn’t seen for decades. My mind warred with all that had unfolded. Although self-preservation pushed me to shut her out, I couldn’t deny how she moved me.
I had to clear my head. And know all the facts.
“Let’s take a step back.” I sat on the bed and patted it next to me. After she sat down, I said, “Tell me more about what happened. When did your mother die?”
She blew out a long breath. “Around five years ago, when I was sixteen.”
“You were so young.” She still was.
“Every day since then, I think of something I could have done differently that wouldn’t have put us there the moment of the accident. And then, in another way I’m grateful that it happened. She died within minutes, rather than suffering. With her illness, no one knew for sure how much longer she had, or how much worse it would have gotten. Even thinking that drowns me with guilt. Who could think that way about their own mother? Only some horrible person.”
“No,” I interrupted. “You can’t think that way. You wanted peace for her. And she found peace more quickly.”
She didn’t appear to hear me. “My mother suffered from something off in her blood—and then she died from a loss of it. I’m going to become a doctor. I want to help others like her. Keep them from enduring the pain she went through.”
All this studying, all the time she’d put into school, was for a noble purpose. Despite the conflict swarming inside me like aggravated bees, I couldn’t help but admire her. “That’s quite noble of you.”
She shook her head. Her voice dropped a note above a whisper. “No, a part of it is out of terror. What she had could be genetic. And one day, I’ll be afflicted like she was. I’d know how she suffered.”
Her pain overshadowed my own, and I’d do anything to remove it. I opened my arms, pulling her into my embrace.
“I’m sorry.” I ran my hand over her hair in a soothing gesture.
Through a strangled voice, she said, “I’d do anything to be able to go back and save her. But I know it’s too late. I can’t give up, though. Other women, other families, could be suffering the way we did. If I can find a way to fix it… Perhaps vampire blood is key. It might be used to cure diseases.”
“I’m sure you’re not the only researcher considering this. Boston is a hub of hospitals and research.”
“Yet none of them had figured out what was wrong with my mother. If I examine myself through the disease’s progression, I might.”
Merda. She hadn’t been using me. She was using herself.
I’d been wrong about her. Had been from the beginning. She wasn’t like many of courtesans I’d met who took on the role to pay for expensive tastes and addictive shopping habits. All those things I said to her returned to me. I was a stronzo. I didn’t deserve her. Not for two weeks. Not ever.
Yet, she’d also been lying to me from the beginning. No matter what her story was, she’d had an agenda coming here, and I couldn’t forget that.
Too many thoughts roared within, forcing more emotions to churn through my mind than I’d experienced in decades.
I had to get away from her to be able to see things clearly. Without having her there to distract me. Because all I wanted to do when I was around her was take her into my arms and comfort her.
I pulled away. “It’s dawn. I need to sleep.”
Before I left her room, I turned back and caught her haunted expression. That had been a mistake, as it made it more difficult to walk away.
I closed the door behind me, forcing one heavy step after another over the hardwood floors to increase the distance between us.
CHAPTER 8
Renato
A battle raged in my mind over the next few nights. I struggled to decide whether or not to end our arrangement early, but I wasn’t ready to let her go. Instead, I avoided her, only seeking her out when I needed to feed, and then left. We didn’t talk about the night when I found her taking her blood—with my blood—what else was there to say?
Although I wanted to bury myself in her warm embrace, my mind was still too rattled over the incident. I wanted to comfort her, to seek my own comfort within her welcoming body, but she’d betrayed me with her deceit.
The problem was exacerbated by our bond. Her pain, her regret, enhanced my own.
Our last night together arrived. Come morning, she’d leave. If I had the inclination to see her again, I’d call Madam Lucia, and we’d make an arrangement. Same as always.
My mouth filled with a bitter tang. I wasn’t ready for her to depart.
I had to have her at least one more time. One more taste.
When I found her in her room, I didn’t say a word. Our eyes caught. So much passed between us, but I didn’t dare speak a word. Enough had already been said.
Two seconds later, I had her in my arms, kissing and touching her everywhere. We grabbed at each other in desperation as we shed our clothes. Only when she was naked on the bed, did I slow down to kiss and lick every inch of her, making her grasp at my hair as she called out my name.
I took her in many positions, frantic to sate my lust until she returned to my bed one day.
She climbed on top and shattered around me with a strangled cry. As she pulsed around me with wave after pleasurable wave, my excitement rocketed. I sank my fangs in her for one last drink for now be
fore I followed her to a precipice and exploded deep within her.
She lowered herself onto me, and her heart beat against my chest. For several moments, neither of us spoke as we recovered.
“That was—cataclysmic,” I finally said.
She laughed. “It certainly was.”
I traced my fingers over her slickened back. “I’m going to miss you.”
It was the truth, but I wondered why I’d say something like that, something that left me so vulnerable.
When she said, “I’ll miss you, too,” it was worth the risk.
Farewells were typically quick and to the point. A quick thank you and an open-ended option for another possible arrangement. I’d leave their room and would be sleeping when they left in the morning.
With Mia, I dawdled. Her departure filled me with anxiety, a sense of abandonment lingered like a storm cloud.
“I’m glad you agreed to join me.”
“Me, too.”
I was her first vampire. Hopefully, I wasn’t too much of a cold, imposing one.
“No regrets?”
“Never.”
I wanted to imprint every part of her to memory. The way she looked at me in a way that could level me. Her unique scent and the taste of her blood that drew on a primal part of me, one that wanted to mate with her repeatedly. I’d never forget the softness of her skin. Nor how the timber of her voice would change depending on her mood—lust, anger, exasperation, and so on.
“What does this mean? You’ll go back to Madam Lucia and get your next assignment.”
Even uttering those words aloud struck me with an intense pang of jealousy. The idea of it. Other vampires touching her, tasting her blood, made me want to tear their heads from their bodies.
Now that we had the blood bond, I’d know. Would I sense her passion while she was in the arms of another vampire? I jabbed my fingernails into my palm, forcing the image away.
Perhaps giving her some of my blood was a mistake. But I had to do it. Whatever compulsion that had driven me to do so was too strong. I needed to remain connected to her somehow until I could invite her back here again.
Pursued: A Vampire Blood Courtesans Romance Page 9