Our Broken Love

by Terri Anne Browning

  Lilli was great with Sophie, and they seemed to get along like they had been best friends since birth. We all stayed in the kitchen for a long while. The girls ate cookies and apple slices, and Christa and I caught up some more. After a while, the girls got restless, and Lilli took Sophie on a tour of the house.

  “Have fun.” I waved at my baby girl. “And, Lilli? Don’t let her get too close to the water when you show her the pool. She swims like a fish, but she’s spontaneous and might get it in her head to jump in even with all her clothes on.”

  “I won’t, Erin. Promise.”

  I took one of the chairs they had vacated, still staring after them even though they were out of sight. “Good Lord! She must have to beat them off with sticks.”

  Christa grimaced. “Rhys is talking about homeschooling her. There are a few girls at school that are jealous of her and make her life hell. But yes, there are some boys at school that have tried talking to her. She’s put them in their places quick enough, though.”

  “Bitches,” I muttered, knowing that bullying was not limited to just a certain clique. “She’s still sweet as ever.”

  “Yes, no thanks to that hussy Rhys brought into her life five years ago.” She shuddered. “Thank God for prenuptial agreements and good lawyers.”

  That had me raising a brow as I quickly put up my walls to hide all the things suddenly swirling around in my mind. “Rhys got another divorce?”

  Christa nodded. “Not three months after the wedding. He told me he regretted it before it even happened. The only reason he even married her was because he…” She trailed off with a twist of her lips when she heard the girls’ voices getting close. “Well, that’s a story for another time, darling. For now, let’s just be satisfied that he learned his lesson and didn’t end up in the poor house to boot.” With a smile, she turned and left the kitchen. “Everything all right, Lilliana?”

  “Yes, Nana.”

  I set there trembling long after Christa had followed the girls. Divorced after only three months of marriage? I put my head in my hands and closed my eyes. “Don’t go down that road, Calloway,” I muttered to myself. “It is none of your business. None!”

  three

  “What in the world is that?”

  I grinned at Matt and shook my head. “That is mine,” I informed him.

  “No duh!” He grunted when I punched his arm. “I’m perfectly aware of the ‘whose,’ but now I’m wondering the how, when, and where?”

  “We can talk later,” I promised him as I watched Lilli and Sophie sitting on the floor of the family room, coloring. The two were oblivious to the rest of the family milling around, and for that, I was thankful. “But don’t expect too much.”

  “If you can’t tell me, then there is no one you can tell,” he assured me quietly. “I think that if I can trust you with my biggest secrets, you can trust me with yours.”

  I glanced up at the handsome beast. “You’re right. But I’m not ready.” I patted him on the cheek a little sharply, the way I had always done. “And there are far too many ears in this room.” I glanced at the housekeeper who was setting out appetizers and stocking the ice bucket. She was pretending to not listen in on everyone’s conversations, but I could tell she was. What was more, I had a feeling she was especially listening in on my conversations.

  Matt followed my gaze and grunted once more. “She’s a temp. Beth took her vacation so she could go on a cruise with her sisters, and the agency sent Ma her.”

  “I knew Aunt Chris would never willingly hire her,” I mused as we filled glasses with wine and handed them out. “I think she’s trying to find a scandalous story to sell to the trash mags.” And boy, if the trash mags got wind of my scandal, they would have a field day.

  “You could be right,” Matt muttered as he took a seat on one of the sofas. I dropped down beside him and rested my head on his shoulder. “That’s why we try to keep the bodies in the basement.”

  I snorted, trying to contain my laughter. “Right beside the torture racks.”

  “I think the old man picked up a few runaways last week. You can go down and have a go at them if you want. Remind me to lend you my key.” Matt took a sip of his red wine, his eyes flooded with amusement. “I think we changed the locks since the last time you were here.”

  “I might take you up on the offer.” I glanced at the housekeeper to find her glaring in my direction. “I’m sure Linda will clean up any mess I make down there.”

  Linda turned and walked out of the room as Matt and I erupted into roaring laughter. Drew tossed his napkin at me. “What’s so funny, you two?”

  “Nothing.” We laughed again, having said it in unison.

  “Just messing with the hired help’s mind,” Matt assured his brother.

  Drew’s brown eyes lit up. “Figures. Was she snooping around listening in?” We nodded. “I wish Dad would tell the agency. I think if she doesn’t get something good soon, she will just make something up.”

  I didn’t altogether care if she did that. As long as Sophie’s and my name didn’t enter into it. “I want to talk to you later, mister,” I told Drew after a minute.

  He frowned at me and then sighed when realization hit. “It isn’t what you think, Erin. I want to marry Cammi. She’s the one who wants to keep it simple.”

  “I still think we should discuss it.” I took a larger than normal sip of my wine.

  “Discuss it with her. And maybe you can talk some sense into the woman. Here I am dying of unrequited love, and she just wants an affair,” he grumbled as he sat back in his chair. “Women!”

  “Amen!” Grayson muttered as he parked his butt on the sofa’s arm and leaned down to kiss my cheek. “Why we can’t live without them I’ll never know.”

  I glanced around, wondering where his fiancée had gone. Grayson had arrived half an hour before with Nina, a leggy blonde who, even at a glance, I could tell was a raging bitch. But not five minutes after arriving, Christa had said something that had made the woman huff, and Grayson had followed her out of the room. He had returned just moments ago, without the lovely Nina.

  “Where did Miss America go?” I questioned.

  Grayson pinched me for the insult. “She decided to call it a night.”

  “What he means is that he couldn’t promise her anything he hasn’t already bribed her with to stay,” Matt interjected. “Nina only comes when there is jewelry, cars, or exotic trips up for grabs.”

  “Shut up, Matt,” Grayson bit out. “You know nothing about it.”

  Matt ignored his brother. “He’s just mad because he knows it’s true. Nina is only out for what she can get. But Mr. Bank Account there is eyes wide shut. Ma tries to tell him, but I guess the muff is too good to give up.”

  I sucked in a deep breath when Grayson jumped to his feet. “How about a busted lip, little brother?”

  Matt stood slower but with just as much menace. “Sure, which lip would you like me to bust?”

  I got between them and pushed them both back a few steps. “No fighting,” I gritted out, shooting a glance at the girls still coloring on the floor.

  They both sucked in sharp breaths as they followed my gaze. Grayson bit off a curse and turned around. He crossed to the window, steam practically puffing from his ears.

  I glared up at Matt. “Did you have to bait him?”

  “There is no use in sugarcoating it for the dumb ox,” Matt said with a shrug as he calmly sat back down. “Right, Drew?”

  Drew nodded. “We aren’t going down without a fight on this one, Erin. We did that with Rhys. Twice. And trust me when I say that we’ve learned from our mistakes. If he won’t willingly open his eyes, then we’ll force them open any chance we get.”

  “What is she like?” I asked quietly as I retook my seat.

  “Gold-digging trash,” Matt muttered, and Drew nodded. “She leads him around on a leash, using sex as a hold over him. I’m guessing it’s the best he has ever had. And then she expects ‘present
s.’ It started off with little things, but over the last few months, they have gotten bigger and bigger.”

  “She’s bleeding him dry emotionally, physically, and financially.” Drew rolled his eyes. “I mean, damn, Erin. He has all the money in the world, but it won’t last if he doesn’t get rid of her.”

  I grimaced and sat back. It was probably best if I kept my mouth shut. I was angry right along with them, but I felt that Grayson was smart enough to make his own mistakes in life. If he couldn’t wake up to a mistake as big as this one, then he deserved what he got.

  All of those thoughts were pushed to the back of my mind as a newcomer to the party walked in as if he owned the place. I forced my body not to stiffen at the sight of him. My heart wouldn’t listen when I commanded it not to run away, but at least my eyes kept my emotions hidden as he went to the bar and poured himself a whiskey.

  I figured he needed the alcohol to get through seeing me again, but then I chastised myself for thinking he would care if he saw me again or not. I probably had never even crossed Rhys’s mind over the years. But still, I was on alert for signs of some kind of reaction as he turned and looked right at me.

  The jolt of electricity I felt at having that blue gaze directly on me did nothing for my accelerated heart rate. “Hello, Erin,” he greeted in his deep, rich voice, making my heart skip a beat when he said my name.

  “Rhys.” I inclined my head, proud of myself when my voice didn’t waver once. “How have you been?”

  He seemed to think on how to answer for a moment before shrugging. “I guess it depends on what time of day it is.” He gave a harsh, emotionless laugh. “But you, you look as beautiful as always.”

  I didn’t dare respond to his compliment. It wouldn’t have mattered if I had as Lilli raised her head from the coloring book she was sharing with Sophie to greet her father. “Hi, Daddy! Did you work hard today?”

  Rhys looked at his daughter lovingly. “It wasn’t that bad, angel face.” His gaze went to Sophie’s bent head. She seemed to be trying extra hard to stay inside the lines. “Who’s your friend?”

  “This is Sophie,” Lilli informed him. “She thinks I’m prettier than Taylor Swift.”

  His blue eyes filled with amusement. “Then she’s definitely a smart one. But it’s getting late. Shouldn’t someone be picking her up soon?”

  “Sophie’s spending the night. We’re going to have a sleepover in my room.” Lilli touched my little girl’s arm to get her attention. “Hey, Sophie, this is my daddy.”

  I watched Rhys as he got his first good look at Sophie. Something in his eyes flared, and he took in every minute detail of her face before turning his hard gaze on me. “Yours?” he croaked out.

  I gave a small nod, not completely trusting my voice right then.

  “Are you a giant?” Sophie asked as she got to her feet and walked over to him, her blue eyes wide with awe.

  Rhys turned his full attention to the little girl standing before him. “Not quite, little bit.”

  “I don’t believe you. You’re the tallest person I’ve ever seen.” She craned her neck so she could get a better look. “So, you gotta be a giant.”

  Matt and Drew snickered quietly, and there was a smile teasing at Rhys’s lips. He crouched down to Sophie’s eye level. “I promise you I am not a giant, Sophie. But if you want to see one, I’ll introduce you to my CFO. He’s even taller than me.”

  “No way!” she exclaimed. “Taller than you? That’s not possible.” She shook her head, her ponytail swinging as she did so. “Mommy, is he a giant or not?”

  “Nope, not a giant. But I can see where you would get confused, darling,” I soothed.

  “Okay. So, you are Lilli’s daddy?” Rhys nodded, his eyes scanning over her face, looking for something that made my stomach tense. “That’s cool.”

  “I’m a cool guy.” Rhys glanced around as if searching for someone. “And where is your daddy, little bit?”

  I nearly groaned. Of course, I knew someone was going to ask her that question at some point. But not this man, damn it! “Who knows?” Sophie sighed as if she had the weight of the world on her little shoulders. “Maybe Mommy knows.”

  His eyes narrowed. “How old are you, Sophie?” he asked, his voice getting hoarse.

  My gut quivered as I watched my daughter hold up five little fingers. “I’m five.”

  He made a choking sound, and I knew he was doing some quick math. “Really? And how long have you been five?”

  “My birthday is April first.” She gave him a cheeky grin. “April fools!”

  I could tell he was redoing the math and coming up with all the right—or maybe wrong—answers. I jumped to my feet. “I think I need some air,” I muttered to no one in particular before rushing from the room. It wasn’t what I wanted to do, far from it. What I really wanted to do with every fiber of my being was snatch up my daughter and run for the hills.

  Instead, I fled the room, alone. I couldn’t stay inside. Even with the air conditioning on, I felt like I was being overcome by heat stroke. When I reached the backyard, I gulped in deep breath after deep breath. I was shaking so badly I wondered if I was going to fall over, so I moved to the glider and flopped down hard. With my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands, I focused on breathing.

  He knows. He knows. Fuck, he knows!

  That knowledge kept screaming at me in the back of my mind. Rhys knew Sophie was his.

  I had to get a grip on myself. So what if he knew? It wasn’t as if he could do anything about it now. After all, he had married someone else just weeks after we had been together. He had tossed away my love as if I had meant nothing to him and given up all rights to his child then and there…

  At least, that was what I had been telling myself for nearly six years now. So what if a little voice had been whispering that he hadn’t exactly given up his rights to his child by throwing my love back in my face? Just because he hadn’t loved or even wanted me didn’t mean the same went for his child.

  “You bitch!”

  My head shot up at the sound of his rich voice. His tone was hard and ice-cold. “Don’t you dare call me that.” I jumped to my feet, ready to do battle even though my thoughts were confused.

  He stopped mere inches from me, glaring down from his hulking six-foot-six height. “You had no right to keep her from me.”

  “And just when was I supposed to tell you, Rhys?” I demanded. “By the time I found out I was pregnant, you were already married. Should I have told you on your wedding night? I’m sure that would have been an interesting conversation.”

  His eyes darkened to cobalt. “You’ve had more than five years to find a way to tell me, damn it.”

  I sighed. He was right. “You know now, Rhys,” I murmured. “And now that you do, what do you suggest I do? Should I go in there and tell everyone in that house who Sophie’s father is?”

  He opened his mouth to answer, only to snap it shut quickly. He turned away from me and paced across the backyard. I stood still, arms crossed over my chest, giving him some space. But after a few minutes, my patience gave out and I followed him. He was standing under a big pine tree, glaring off into the night. I stopped right beside him, not close enough to touch him but plenty close enough to feel his body heat.

  We stood there for a while, neither of us speaking, and the realization that my life was about to change in a huge way settled over me. I couldn’t hide from the truth any longer now that he knew. I was going to have to tell Sophie and the rest of the world who her father was. I wasn’t ready, didn’t think I would ever be ready for that, but it didn’t look like I had a choice now.

  After a few more long minutes of quiet between us, I felt some of the tension leaving his body. “I’m sorry for calling you a bitch,” he said as he blew out a long breath, his voice having lost the frost. “This is just as much my fault as it is yours. I’ve made so many mistakes in my life…” He let out a laugh that was full of self-mockery. “I can’t even begin to
explain to you all the things I’ve done wrong.”

  My jaw clenched. “I think I can understand a few of them.” I was at the top of his list of “mistakes,” no doubt. “I’ve made some pretty big mistakes too. You, being the biggest one. But I don’t regret Sophie. And I’m sorry you haven’t had a chance to share her life. I just don’t think that it’s smart to announce to the world that you are her father. Not yet anyway.” He remained silent, and I gritted my teeth. “We need to think this through before we do anything rash.”

  He blew out a long sigh. “You’re right. I overreacted, and I’m sorry. Maybe we can take some time and talk about this.”

  “I guess we’ll have to. Sophie and I will be here for a month.”

  His eyes narrowed again, his gaze taking on a dangerous quality. But if his goal was to scare me, he had missed the mark. I had never been scared of him. He’d never physically hurt me. I wasn’t in the least bit intimidated by him. “That’s it? Just a month? What happens when that month is up?”

  “Then we can talk about visitation.” My gut hurt at the thought of having to share Sophie with him. Having to put her through the long hours in a car to and from home. I would have to think on that more later, but I didn’t think I could handle doing that to her.

  “Erin.” The way he said my name made me melt a little. He took a step closer to me, and I had clench my teeth to keep from inching closer. How stupid could I get? I was a glutton for punishment and heartache, which was all this man seemed to be able to give me.

  “Hey, dinner is ready,” Matt called out from the back door, his voice sounding reluctant to interrupt us. “You guys going to eat?”

  Rhys took several steps back, an old reflex he had perfected when he had been fighting the pull between us all those years before, and thrust his hands into his pants pockets. Jaw clenched, he gazed off into the dark. “You go. I’m not hungry.”