by Pam Howes
* * *
Alice felt numb as she walked back to the Legion with Brian and Cathy in tow. She wondered if Jack had taken Susan by force, and whether there were others? And yet he had a certain charm that ladies seemed to like, including herself at one time. So why did he have a split personality? The customers all loved him; he got on with everyone he met. His staff respected him, as did Arnold and Winnie. Even Brian got along really well with him. Was it a medical condition that had gone undiagnosed all his life? And how could she get to the bottom of it without causing World War Three? She just felt so confused at the moment and knew she had to keep herself calm for her baby’s sake. Now wasn’t the time for confrontations; it would all have to wait, except for her concerns about Cathy. She’d need to deal with that as soon as she could.
Jack was asleep on the bed and Alice closed the door on him. He’d been sleeping on the sofa for ages now and complained of neck and back pain from not being comfortable, so after a busy lunchtime and afternoon in the club he was probably worn out, especially if his foot was hurting. Brian went into his bedroom to do some studying and Alice told Cathy to come and sit beside her on the sofa.
She held Cathy in her arms and spoke gently to her, telling her what Granny Lomax had said.
A worried look crossed Cathy’s face and she whispered, ‘Don’t tell Jack I told tales, Mammy, please.’
‘I won’t, don’t worry. But did Jack really say those things to you, or do you think he may have been joking so that you would be a good girl?’ She still couldn’t believe that he would threaten to take Cathy away.
Cathy shrugged. ‘He said he would take me away to the naughty girls’ home and have lots of babies with you instead of keeping me.’ Tears ran down Cathy’s face and Alice hugged her close.
‘Well, let me tell you this,’ Alice began. ‘You’re my little girl and Jack can’t take you anywhere without my say-so, and I would never give you away. So I don’t want you to worry about it any more. Okay?’
Cathy sniffed loudly and wiped her nose on her cardigan sleeve.
‘You are going to be a big sister very soon and I need you here to help me look after the baby, so you’re going nowhere, my girl.’
Cathy smiled through her tears. ‘Will it be a brother or a sister? Debbie wants a sister but her mammy said she can want, she’s not getting one. I’m lucky, aren’t I, Mammy?’
‘You are, sweetheart, we’re all lucky, and we’ll love our new baby, whether it’s a brother or a sister, as much as I love you. Now go and get changed ready for bed and I’ll read you a story.’
Cathy nodded. ‘I like you reading me a story, but I don’t like Jack doing it.’
‘Well don’t worry because he won’t be doing it again. Either Brian or I will do that from now on. But listen, Cathy, we have to live here, so just keep out from under Jack’s feet and try and be a good girl, okay?’
Cathy nodded and ran off to her bedroom. Satisfied that her daughter felt reassured, Alice dropped her head back on the sofa and sighed. The lounge door creaked open and Jack slid into the room. He came and sat down on the chair opposite her and half-smiled, as though unsure of his reception.
‘Can I get you a cuppa, gel?’
Surprised, Alice nodded. ‘If you don’t mind.’
She watched as he limped out to the kitchen, coming back a few minutes later with a tray, two mugs of tea and a plate of lemon puff biscuits, Alice’s favourites. He put the tray down on the coffee table in front of the sofa and sat down beside her.
He cleared his throat. ‘Er, I’ve been thinking, we can’t go on like this. I feel like I’m walking on eggshells all the time. I know what happened is all my fault and I am really sorry for what I did. I didn’t know what I was doing, I swear. It’s like someone else takes over my mind when I’ve had my pills and alcohol. Like I’m two people. I know that’s not an excuse, Alice. But it’s the way it is. After everything you’ve done for me I should be kissing the bloody ground you walk on. Instead I treat you badly and then knock you up. I’m so sorry, gel. Can you forgive me?’
Alice blew out her cheeks. She hadn’t been expecting this. She had been ready to have a go at him for terrifying Cathy. Should she say something or just keep quiet and hope that her daughter felt reassured enough to put things behind her? Cathy might have misunderstood him, or Jack’s threats might also be linked to his pill intake and drinking. Hopefully it would all get better now. Jack took her hand and she didn’t pull away. Today he looked more like the Jack who had taken care of her when her mam died and supported her after Terry’s death. He too had shadows showing under eyes that looked unhappy.
One half of her wanted to believe he was genuinely sorry while the other half wasn’t quite sure. Did he care, or was he frightened of losing his home and his precious Legion? Would Sadie or Millie have given him another chance if they’d been in her place? They liked Jack after all, so maybe they would. Her confusion was growing out of all proportion now. Whatever she decided, she and Jack had no choice but to stay together and make it work.
‘What about the baby?’ she whispered.
‘What about it? It’s gonna be here in a few weeks. I’m just gonna have to get used to the idea that I’ll be a dad, aren’t I?’
Alice drew a deep breath and thought about the daughter he’d supposedly fathered and wanted nothing to do with. But this wasn’t the time to bring that up. Perhaps the girl, Susan, had led him on, or the gossipmongers might even have made it all up. She only had Granny Lomax’s word on it. Whatever, she wasn’t going to mention it just now. With a bit of effort on both sides they could make things work. It had to be better than her living alone with the children and deep down she still had feelings for the nicer side of him.
‘Okay.’ She nodded. ‘But on one condition. Stop making a fool of me with Sheila. I’m not sharing you, Jack. People are starting to talk. Either she goes or I do, and I want my money back if that happens.’
He smiled. ‘I fired her earlier. The last couple of nights I’ve done nothing but think about things. I wanted to make some changes. Sheila going was the first one, before I spoke to you. And I’m gonna get help, Alice, to get my head sorted out good and proper. I don’t want to lose you, the kids or the business.’
Alice couldn’t believe her ears and breathed a sigh of relief. ‘You’ve really fired Sheila? Then yes, Jack. I need a peaceful life for the next few weeks at least. I’ll help you to get yourself sorted out. Let’s work together and look forward to a better future, for all of us.’
* * *
Alice slid out of bed as quietly as she could so as not to disturb Jack. She needed to use the toilet again. It was never-ending. It was the last Sunday of September, and the club had been so busy all weekend that she’d ended up helping Brian to collect the glasses, even though Jack had told her off for not resting. She was fed up, stuck upstairs, and had sneaked down once Cathy was asleep to see who was in the concert room. She’d spent some of the night talking to Marlene, Freddie and Sadie and had enjoyed their company. Sadie had told her that Luca wanted to see Gianni again before the end of the year, when he would be going back to Italy. She’d agreed he could come to the house, and as before, her family would be with her. Once a year wasn’t a lot of time to spend with a parent, but as Sadie said, it was the best of a bad job and was better than nothing.
Sheila’s replacement on the bar was a stocky, dark-haired girl with glasses called Valerie, who thankfully wasn’t Jack’s type. She wasn’t as on the ball as Sheila, but she was learning fast and was perfectly pleasant to the customers, who seemed to like her.
At ten thirty Brian and Alice had come back upstairs and Brian had gone straight to bed as he had school in the morning. Alice’s back was killing her and she’d run a bath and had a quick soak to ease her aching bones. She’d been asleep by the time Jack had come to bed, only to be woken by the demands of her flipping bladder again.
She waddled slowly towards the bathroom, gasping as a wave of pain shot aro
und her middle. She doubled over and chewed her lip, recognising the pain as a contraction. Damn it, the baby wasn’t due until next week, according to her midwife, but being conceived on New Year’s Eve, it was probably bang on time. Her small case was packed and stood by the bedroom door in readiness. She used the toilet, put some soap, talc and her toothbrush in a small wash bag and was making her way back to the bedroom to wake up Jack when her waters burst and splashed onto her bare feet and the varnished floorboards in the hall, missing the rug by inches.
‘Oh no!’ She doubled over again as another pain shot through her. ‘Jack,’ she called, but there was no response. She called again and Brian came out of his bedroom.
‘Alice, what’s up?’
‘The baby’s coming and I can’t get Jack’s attention. Try and wake him up for me and then we need to phone for an ambulance. The number is fastened up on the kitchen cupboard. Grab a towel out of the bathroom and I’ll sit on this chair out here, but I don’t want to wet it.’
Brian ran into the bathroom and placed a folded towel on the hall chair and Alice gingerly lowered herself onto it. He dashed into the bedroom and came back out shaking his head.
‘He’s out cold. Must have been drinking after we left him downstairs.’
Alice sighed. That was all she needed. Jack had been making an effort to cut down on his drinking, just in case this sort of scenario presented itself. Typical that he’d decided to have a few on the one night she needed him.
‘Never mind,’ she said. ‘Leave him be. He’ll be no use to me now anyway like that. Run down and phone for the ambulance and I’ll go with them. You can stay here and look after Cathy for me. Get her up for school and help her with her breakfast and uniform. Marlene will pick her up. Let’s hope Jack is awake by then. I’ll ask the hospital to ring here as soon as there’s any news. And don’t worry about me,’ she said, looking at Brian’s anxious face. ‘I’ve done it before and this time there’ll be no air raid warnings to contend with.’
* * *
Sandra Mary Dawson arrived kicking and screaming at six am on Monday morning, September 27th. Her exhausted mother gave a sigh of relief as both baby and afterbirth were delivered with ease. No emergency surgery for this one like there’d been after Cathy’s birth, when the placenta had to be removed surgically at the hospital.
‘She’s got a good pair of lungs,’ the midwife said, wrapping the screaming baby in a nappy and slipping the hook of the scales through the pointed ends. Sandra swung in the air, quieter now as the midwife stared at the dial. ‘Seven pounds and three ounces. A good weight. Right, young lady, a quick cuddle from your mum and then we’ll get her cleaned up while you have a little nap in the nursery.’ She wrapped the baby in a white sheet and handed her to Alice.
Alice stared down at the frowning little face that studied her intently and smiled, feeling that familiar rush of love she’d had for Cathy and for Millie’s baby boy when she held him. Relief washed over her. Sandra’s conception thankfully didn’t overshadow her feelings as she’d worried it might do. She looked nothing like Cathy did at birth. Sandra had dark hair and the same button nose, but that was the only real resemblance. With her chubby fists pushed into each cheek, her eyes were blue like Jack’s, her rosebud lips the same shape as his and her eyebrows as dark as her hair, just like his. The name Sandra for a girl had been agreed by the pair of them just the other night, and Mary was Jack’s late mother’s name. Alice traced her finger around the tiny dimple in her chin and Sandra opened her mouth, seeking out the finger. Her gums clamped around it and she sucked hard, looking puzzled when nothing came out. Alice marvelled at how babies knew exactly what to do from the minute they arrived.
‘I think she’s hungry,’ she said to the midwife. ‘Shall I try and feed her? And will you ring my home and let my husband know he’s got a daughter, please?’ She hoped he’d be pleased, or at least try to seem pleased that he was. The thoughts of his rejected daughter popped briefly into her mind, but she quickly let them go. If the midwife rang now, Brian and Cathy would still be there, and maybe Jack could pop in for afternoon visiting to see her.
* * *
Alice opened her eyes as someone dropped a kiss on her forehead. Jack was standing awkwardly by the bed with a bunch of red roses.
‘Hello,’ she croaked, her mouth dry. She couldn’t believe it was two o’clock already. She’d slept since giving birth, but she must have needed it. She shuffled up the bed and Jack moved to help her, putting the roses down on the bedside trolley.
‘How you doing, gel?’ he asked, taking her hand and squeezing it gently. He looked around the room. ‘Where is it then?’
‘Sandra is in the nursery, while I had a rest,’ Alice replied, trying not to feel annoyed that he’d called their new daughter ‘it’. He was here, he wasn’t drunk or even smelling of whisky and he’d brought her roses for the first time ever. It was a good start. ‘And I’m doing fine, thanks.’
‘Bit of a shock when I woke up,’ he began. ‘I wish I’d known, but Brian couldn’t wake me. Still, there’s not a lot I could have done; it’s women’s work, giving birth.’
Alice smiled. ‘It is.’ She rang the bell at the side of her bed and a young nurse appeared, neat in her uniform. Alice’s thoughts momentarily turned to Cathy and how one day she might be working as a nurse here at Clatterbridge Hospital, fingers crossed. ‘Could we have our daughter, please?’ Alice asked.
‘Of course, Mrs Dawson. I’ll go and get her.’ She was back within seconds, clutching a little shawl-wrapped bundle. Jack had sat himself down on the armchair pulled up close to the bed and the look of panic on his face as the baby was placed in his arms made Alice smile.
‘Just relax, Jack,’ she said as the nurse hurried out of the room to answer a buzzer.
He looked up and then back down at the baby, who was staring at him with her big blue eyes wide open. ‘She’s not bad-looking,’ he said. ‘I can see me mam in her. Isn’t that funny? Perhaps because she’s got no teeth!’
‘Can you? That’s nice, but I think she looks like you,’ Alice said, smiling.
‘Do you? Poor little bugger,’ he quipped. ‘I have never before in my life held a baby,’ he went on. ‘This is the first time. And it feels quite nice.’
Alice breathed a sigh of relief. There was no way she was expecting Jack to win a father-of-the-year competition any time soon, but this was better than she’d hoped for. He looked quite relaxed and happy.
‘Thanks, gel, for giving me a lovely kiddie,’ he said. ‘I promise I’ll try and do my best for all of us. We’re a proper family now. A daughter each, and our Brian, who’s like a son to me. That’ll do me.’
‘I think we’ll be okay, Jack, don’t you?’ Alice said as he nodded, not taking his eyes off his new daughter’s face.
‘We will, gel, we will.’
* * *
If you were heartbroken by Alice’s story, don’t miss the first book in the Lark Lane series, The Factory Girls of Lark Lane. Available now!
The Factory Girls of Lark Lane
The Lark Lane Trilogy Book 1
Can friendship get them through the struggles of war?
1940, Liverpool: Alice Turner and her best friend, Millie Markham, work for the war effort at Rootes munitions factory, making shell caps and Halifax bombers. Alice’s sweetheart Terry is home from the front for a brief period of leave. She’s been in love with him since school, and the women are excitedly planning a whirlwind wedding.
But the honeymoon is soon over. Terry must go back to the dangers of Nazi-occupied France, and the ever-present air raid sirens quickly bring Alice back down to earth. When a terrible explosion at the factory leads to a tragic death, Millie receives devastating news, and a loved one is announced missing in action, the heartbreak of war is suddenly all too real.
Alice must believe Terry will make it home to keep up her strength. Her mother and Millie need all her support, and morale at the factory is at an all-time low.
; Can Alice and Millie help one another make it through these dark times, even as the war stretches on with no sign of an ending?
The Factory Girls of Lark Lane is a heart-wrenching family saga about women in World War 2, the strength of friendship, and hope. If you’re a fan of Nadine Dorries, Diney Costeloe and Kitty Neale, you’ll love Pam Howes!
Get it here.
Hear more from Pam
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Books by Pam Howes
The Lark Lane Trilogy
1. The Factory Girls of Lark Lane
2. The Shop Girls of Lark Lane
The Mersey Trilogy
1. The Lost Daughter of Liverpool
2. The Forgotten Family of Liverpool
3. The Liverpool Girls
Rock ’n’ Roll Romance Series
Three Steps to Heaven
’Til I Kissed You