by Leah Shay
"Jared, you are creeping me out," I said sounding sleepy.
He did not move. He was in a trancelike state.
I sat up in the bed and ran my fingers through my hair. "Jared! You are creeping me out. What is wrong with you?"
He blinked. "Sorry, Kyra, maybe we shouldn't ... I'm afraid I am ..." He shook his head.
"Jared, what are you trying to say?" I asked nervously.
"I'm no good for you, Kyra." He shifted uncomfortably in the chair. "I'm afraid I am not good enough for you."
"Where is this coming from?" I asked, as I sat on the side of the bed facing him. My eyes caught sight of the clock on the wall; it was six-fifteen PM.
Shit, it's almost change of shift. The night shift will be coming on soon. There will be twice as much staff and my chances of being seen leaving Jared's room will be greater.
"Do you see what time it is? I've been sleeping for two hours. Why didn't you wake me?" I was very flustered.
"You told me you loved me while you were sleeping," he said somberly.
"What?" I was shocked.
What the hell is wrong with me? I would never say that while I was awake and I had no intentions of saying it any time soon. It might be evident that I am attracted to him, but to tell him I loved him!
"Kyra, I do not want to hurt you, but there is a great chance that if you stay with me, you might get hurt."
"So, what are you saying, Jared?" I was terrified of what he would say next. I felt my heart tighten like it was in a vice grip and the life had been squeezed from it.
He paused, his eyes downcast. "Nothing," he answered. "I want nothing more than to be with you ... and love you the way you deserve."
I believed his earnest words, but something in his tone made me doubt his capability. His empty eyes told me he was scared of something greater that he had little or no control over.
"Respect and be honest with me. You said you want nothing more than to be with me and love me just as much. That's all I ask."
I needed to prepare myself for what lay ahead if I was going to take this journey with him. How could I protect my heart when I had already given it to him and he knew it?
Two familiar voices drifted into the room. It was the day and night shift nurses doing their rounds. I told Jared to let them in, got off the bed, picked up my handbag, and hid in the bathroom.
The nurses came in. Alex, the night nurse, introduced herself and they had a brief, courteous conversation.
"Is there anything you need? Anything I can do for you before I leave?" asked Toni, his day nurse.
"I do not wish to be disturbed. I'll call if I need anything," he said, in a dismissive tone.
I would have been happy if a patient told me not to disturb him or her. That would be one less patient to deal with. But I knew what Toni and Alex were saying the moment that room door shut behind them.
Where does he think he is? He doesn't want to be disturbed. This is a hospital, not a hotel. Treating us like hired help. Nurses hate to be made to feel like less than what they are - professionals. Not maids, which some of our patients think we are.
"Are you hungry?" Jared asked, as I came out of the bathroom.
"You realize you were a bit curt with your nurses."
"I'm sorry, but I wanted you out of that bathroom."
"Right now they are discussing how abrupt you were; during the week you are the perfect patient, but on the weekends you are different, very crabby."
"Is that what they say about me? I have a very rational reason why I might be different."
"What would that be?"
"That's because I'm missing you."
His mood had changed. It was a totally different Jared sitting in front of me. Before he was pensive, worried about hurting me; now he acted as if nothing had happened. How could I bring up that topic again so he could explain what he meant by him hurting me?
"You need to eat."
"No, I don't. I need to get out of here."
"Not until you eat."
"I'll eat when I get home, Jared."
"Sit!" he commanded.
I slid into the chair around the table. I knew Jared Stern well enough to realize I would not leave the room until I obliged him and ate. On the table were several food containers; their delicious, mouth-watering aromas filtered up into my nasal passages. I was not going anywhere until I did as he said. It was dark outside. The city lights glittered in the distance. He placed the seafood pasta in front of me.
"Do my nurses talk about me?" he asked, as he raised his glass to his lips.
"Don't flatter yourself. We talk about all our patients."
He smiled. "You are a very good nurse, Kyra. You care, and it shows in everything you do."
"I love what I do. Nursing is a mentally, emotionally, and physically demanding job. There are good patients and bad patients. The sickest are always the best and the worst are the ones who are only here for the pain meds. We call them the 'frequent fliers.' No matter how difficult a patient is, I will always go into the room with a smile, but thank God, they cannot read my mind, because I would not have a job if they could. When I return to the nurses station, I will complain about what a pain in the ass you are, and all the nurses will know and will not want to take care of you."
"Do all nurses do that?"
"We are human beings; our feelings get hurt, and we have to vent."
"So, what do they say about me?"
"You have to understand that with all the attention you are getting, taking care of you can be stressful and intimidating. Nobody wants to mess up." I twirled the linguini around on the fork. "I don't like taking care of VIPs and I always get stuck with them. You have to bend over backwards for them, doing whatever it takes to make them happy, with the nurse manager and administration breathing down your neck; it is ridiculous."
I placed some pasta in my mouth. Jared's hand reached over and stopped mine as I attempted to wipe the sauce from my mouth with the napkin. He pulled me to him and licked the Alfredo sauce from the corner of my mouth. Then he placed a chaste kiss on my lips. My pelvic floor weakened and I closed my eyes and tightened my pelvic muscles to stop the impending burning in my sweet spot for him.
"I think it's time for me to go." He stirred feelings in me that if he had continued, I would have ended up doing something that I might have regretted. Having sex with Jared while he was still in the hospital was definitely not going to happen. Without even a goodbye kiss, I thanked Jared for the dinner and left.
J.C. and Hunter, the wrestler bodyguard, were in the sitting area. They both looked up as I exited the room.
"J.C., can you do me a favor?" I asked.
"How can I help you, Kyra?" he asked, as he came toward me.
"Can you make sure no one is in the hallway? I'm taking the stairs down."
J.C. went out into the hallway. Hunter stood in the open doorway; and I hid behind the wall in the sitting area. As soon as I heard the word "Go," I left the room and hastily walked around the corner to the stairs, with Hunter following behind me. I pushed on the door that led to the stairs; the alarm went off as the door opened, and I ran down the stairs to the first floor.
Chapter Seven
It was late afternoon when I got a call from Gregory Carmichael. I'd known Gregory since high school, and he was my oldest and dearest friend. When Robert died, he was there for me emotionally and financially. In my time of grief, when I thought that I would lose everything, he rescued us. It has become a tradition that whenever he was in town, we would get together. The timing was not right. I was scheduled to work tonight, but I thought I could squeeze in an early dinner.
Gregory was his usual fun-loving, jolly self, but I was greatly concerned about how overweight he was. As long as I have known Gregory, he has always been a big boy and his love for food has greatly affected his health. Surgical intervention was not something that I would encourage someone to do because the complications are so great, but for him the benefits by far outweigh
the risks.
I returned home with enough time for a couple of hours sleep. I took my shower, set my alarm, and went to bed. I was dreaming that I was late for work and jumped up; it was pitch black outside and the house was in total darkness. The clock on my night table illuminated seven-eighteen PM. My heart raced as I jumped out of bed. What happened to my alarm? I had forgotten to plug my cell phone in and it had died. I plugged my phone in and called work to inform them I was running late. I hastily got dressed; luckily I had taken a shower before I went to sleep. If Nate had been home, I would not have been late for work. My phone rang as I ran down the stairs. It was Jared.
"Hello," I answered.
"Why are you so breathless, Kyra?"
"I'm running down my stairs. I'm late for work."
"Busy day?"
"I'll talk to you when I get there. Bye."
I sped to work cussing at anyone who hindered my speedy ride there. Two stoplights away from work I noticed flashing lights behind me. I was being pulled over. My heart raced, but I kept calm. My perfect driving record was not going to be tarnished tonight. I attached my badge to my scrub top and rolled down the car window.
The young officer peered into the car. "Ma'am, do you realize you are doing sixty in a forty-five zone?"
"Sorry, officer, I was called in on my day off. I didn't realize I was speeding. I was trying to get to work as quickly as I could to help my team out."
He glanced at my badge.
"Ma'am, slow it down and have a good night." He tapped the top of my car and walked away.
"Thank you, officer," I called after him.
It worked. That was a plan I'd always had in the back of my mind if I got pulled over on my way to work, and it was successful. I slowly pulled away and followed the speed limit for the next couple of miles.
.
Hunter, the wrestler looking body guard, was in the sitting area.
"Mr. Stern is with his family in the next room," he said.
"Thank you."
As a habit I knocked on the room door and entered. I wrote my name on the board so Jared knew that I was there. Loud laughing and talking from Room 826 sounded into the room. They were having a joyous time.
I was almost nine PM. Claire had finished taking vital signs on her patients and returned to the nurses station.
"Claire, did you do the vitals on 825?" I asked.
"Yes, Kyra."
"Is he still in 826 with his family?"
"Yes he is, Kyra."
At the nurses station, I checked my emails and watched the intercom light up with every other room number except Jared's. With every annoying buzz of the call light, I eagerly looked to see if it was Jared's room and was disappointed when it was not.
Finally the call light in 825 went on.
I calmed the anxiety that overtook me, and pressed the intercom button. "How can I help you?" I answered.
"Can I see my nurse, please?" Jared said. His voice reverberated across the nurses station.
"Sir, is there anything she can bring for you?"
"Herself, please," he answered smugly.
"She'll be right there," I answered and turned off the intercom.
Everyone at the nurses station laughed.
I should have picked up the handset.
"Kyra, please bring yourself to Room 825," Marie mockingly said.
"Your VIP needs you, Kyra. Don't keep him waiting," Sophia teased.
"You guys are intolerable," I said as I walked away from the station.
Their laughter followed me down the hall.
"How are you, Kyra?" Jared said as I entered.
"I'm fine, thank you. How are you doing?" My heart was overjoyed to see him. He was a superb vision of godliness, candy to my eyes, sitting up in bed in his tight-fitting, white tee shirt that hugged his strong chest. I wanted to run my fingers through his unruly hair. Take his face in my hands and plant soft tender kisses all over his smooth, soft face, saving his lips for last. When I had covered every inch of his perfectly sculptured face with my kisses, I would devour his full, firm, well-formed lips with mine tasting him, drinking him in...
"Had a busy day today?" he asked.
"Uh."
Why did he have to ruin my daydream?
"Um, not really. I had an early dinner with a friend. When he's in town, we try to get together."
"So who is this friend?" he asked.
"A childhood friend. Are you jealous?" I asked, sensing a tinge of jealousy in his voice.
"Should I be?" he asked. His eyes grew dark.
"There is no need," I reassured him and sat on the side of his bed. "He's more like the big brother I never had."
He suddenly appeared to be unsettled about something. I prayed he was not an insecure and possessive kind of guy. That's where we would have a problem.
I placed a hand on his cheek and kissed his sweet lips gently, reassuringly. He responded by sliding a hand to the back of my head, his lips suddenly hard on mine, his tongue extended deep in my mouth, and he kissed me ever so deeply, hot, and needy. My lips were the cure for his insatiable thirst, sucking, probing, drinking me like a parched man who had crossed the desert and was then given his first drink of water. I felt his heated emotions exuding through his pores, sending warmth throughout my body. I was tempted to straddle him to feel his hardness against my now hot, throbbing v-jay. Hot, live emotions surged through my body. I eased up to straddle him.
"How can I help you? Your call light is on." Claire's voice sounded from the speaker above our heads.
For a second I thought we were caught. I froze against his lips, and my heart stopped.
"I'm sorry. It was an accident," Jared answered.
We must have accidentally pressed the call light button when we were caught up in that torrid kiss. Claire's voice brought me back to reality. I quickly pulled away, breathless, stood up, and backed away from his bed.
I could not believe what I was about to do if we had not been interrupted. His hand reached out to me, and I shook my head, but that sad, longing look in his eyes propelled my legs toward him. He took my hand and I sat next to him. He gently caressed my cheek. "How I've missed you."
My body ached for him again. "I've missed you, too."
My v-jay throbbed at the erotic visualization of my lips personally exploring every inch and crevice of his magnificent body. I longed for those sexy, hot lips all over me, but for the meantime I would settle for them on mine. I leaned forward to claim his lips once again. He groaned. He was in pain.
"Babe, does it hurt?" I asked as I pulled away.
"Kyra, can you take a look at my leg, please?" Jared asked as he tried to adjust his leg on the pillows. I helped him to get comfortable and briefly looked over his leg, which he had elevated on pillows.
"Since early morning, I've been having pain in my calf; it seems to be getting worse."
"Did you tell anybody about this, Jared?" Inside I was livid, but I tried not to let it show.
"I'm telling you now, Kyra." He looked at me intently.
"Why do you think I always ask if you have pain in the calf?"
His calf was warm and slightly swollen, and he was obviously uncomfortable.
"Please, I'm begging you, Jared. Do not get out of this bed for anything. Please promise me."
"What's going on, Kyra?"
"There's a possibility you might have a clot in your leg: deep vein thrombosis - DVT. I have to call Dr. Collins."
I felt he did not understand the severity of his situation. I stood at the foot of his bed and gave him my serious nurse stare, but it did not go as planned because what came out of my mouth I would not have said to any other patient.
"The clot in your leg could be fatal! Please don't ruin my life. After so long I finally feel like I'm alive, so I'm begging you to take this seriously."
"And I would not want to ruin your life," he said very affected. I heard anguish in his voice and felt that serious undertone went deeper than what I wa
s trying to achieve. I reflected back to last night with him and was immediately reminded of his trepidation about hurting me.
Gabby and Jared were in the sitting area. "Guys, don't let him get out of bed at all," I emphasized.
"What's going on, Kyra?" Gabby asked sounding concerned. A worried frown creased her forehead.
"I'll have to call Dr. Collins, but I think Jared might have a clot in his leg, so until we know for certain he's on bed rest. He does everything in that bed; do not under any circumstance get him out of bed." I hastily left the room.
Dr. Collins ordered a stat venous Doppler ultrasound and gave me his cell phone number to call with the results. Five minutes later the tech was in Jared's room with the portable ultrasound machine performing the test. Not much longer after the test was completed, I received a call from the radiologist. Jared had a very large clot in his left leg. I immediately called Dr. Collins and received orders to start him on a blood thinner and to get consent for a filter placement.
I brought Jared the paperwork to sign for the procedure. Gabby was sitting on the chair next to his bed. The room thick with tension.
He took the consent forms from me and placed them on the table next to him. The siblings stared at each other; the atmosphere in the room was foreboding.
"Vas a firmar?" Gabby asked angrily.
Are you going to sign?
"Gabby, dame un poco de tiempo," Jared answered.
Gabby, give me some time.
"Odio cuando te pones asi. Ya sabes lo peligroso que es esto."
I hate it when you get like this; you know how dangerous this is.
"Gabby, por favor."
Gabby, please.
"Jared, conozco esa mirada y me da miedo. Estoy llamando a Mama."
Jared, I know that look, and it scares me. I'm calling Mom.
"Gabby, espere. Voy a firmar."
Gabby, wait. I'll sign.
I handed him the papers to sign. I hoped I did not give myself away. I understood every word they said. He signed them. Gabby watched as he did, and handed them back to me.