Taming Wells

by Storm, Zee Shine

  How do I even say it? How do I tell my husband that I'm starting to have feelings for Jasper again?

  After everything I went through to survive his betrayal, I need to protect myself.

  Because even if he cares for me and comforts me. Even if he thinks I deserve to be treated well and that I belong here...

  He won't ever love me the way he loves Cole.

  He won't ever say those words to me again.

  ****

  Chapter 12

  Jasmine

  Armaan was playing soccer with the kids in the field one afternoon as I sat on the grass and watched them during intervals while typing up a chapter on my laptop. It was hard concentrating because of the way he laughed and rolled on the grounds just goofing around with toddlers. My beautiful distraction.

  This was mostly me now when he interacted with them, just watching from the sidelines. But I was content with it. I liked seeing him happy.

  A lemony fragrance reached my nose after a minute. I looked up and saw Skye Madison standing next to me, her eyes fixed on her son who was amongst the group on the playground. Then she looked back at me with an unsmiling expression.

  I put up my hands. "I swear I had nothing to do with it. He followed Armaan and the kids here and Jasper knows about it. He said he'll come get him soon."

  She didn't reply as she watched the kids playing happily but just folded her arms and stood there. I went back to my task. I really didn't want to get in the middle of this. Kids, parents, play dates...not my scene.

  I felt it so strongly after a while...that Skye wanted to say something. God, I hated that about myself...my inability to just remain oblivious to my surroundings. I could lose myself in my words but would still be so aware of what was going on around me. Most of the time, I ignored that sense. But sometimes...

  "You know, I can't concentrate when you're looming over me like that," I said to her. "At least sit down or something. The grass isn't poisonous I assure you."

  She didn't move for a while but as I kept typing, she finally lowered herself next to me and extended her legs. It was awkward. Super awkward. Like I could feel that awkwardness just seeping into the air around us and making camp there. I let out a sigh.

  "Why am I always the odd one out?" she suddenly asked out loud.

  I glanced at her warily. What was she talking about?

  She plucked a blade of grass, no not plucked, aggressively pulled it out of the ground and frowned at it.

  "Cole loves him. You love him. Jacob and Ben love him. Hell, even Armaan is starting to love him. It's so easy for you people. And he's so easy on you people," she muttered, sounding frustrated. "Why can't I be like you guys?"

  It took me a few seconds to realise that she was talking about Jasper.

  I didn't know what to say to her. I mean, Jasper was Jasper. How could you not love that big brute? Yeah, he could be an arrogant, stubborn prick sometimes but man, I'd seen that man break down and cry in front of me while he was drunk out of his mind, just hurting and missing people he cared about so all the other annoying traits of his didn't even register with me unless I needed to knock some sense into him.

  Skye looked absolutely tortured. I couldn't believe she was coming to me for advice and to talk after what had happened the last time. Why would anything I say even matter to her right now?

  But her pain was so obvious. She wasn't being mean to me. She wasn't regarding me with suspicion or judgement. It felt as though she was just a girl who felt alone and confused and didn't know whom to turn to. I nibbled on my lip trying to think about it. About what to say.

  "It's okay to not be able to feel like others do," I tried after a moment of pondering. "Everyone expects you to just get over your inhibitions and fall in line but if you don't feel it, you don't feel it." I shrugged. "That's who you are as a person and there's no need to feel ashamed about it."

  Hell, was I even referring to her? Because while speaking those words, I also kept thinking about Armaan and the kids and how I just couldn't bring myself to want them as much as he does. I knew I didn't want to be anyone’s mommy.

  "By the way, why are we talking about Jasper?" I suddenly asked her, studying her profile. "Is he giving you trouble?"

  She let out a humorless laugh. "This would be so much easier if he was," Skye answered in a bitter tone. "Even if we did work things out on a personal level someday...I know that he won't ever change his ways. He's too wild. He doesn't like being cornered or kept in line. Cole is indulging his every whim and my husband is happy with the guy but I don't ever see myself doing that." She shook her head adamantly. "I can never be okay with casual sex outside of a relationship. Like it's a hard limit for me. Why am I so wrong for believing that?" she cried out.

  I was freaking out a little. Was she having a nervous breakdown? I glanced over at Armaan but he was on the far end of the field now with the little ones. He was better with these things. Dealing with people and situations. Me, if I wasn't close to someone, I just froze up.

  "You should be talking to Cole and Jasper about all this," I said quietly, trying to sound comforting and hoping I was succeeding.

  When Skye turned to me, there were tears in her eyes. "I can't," she whispered helplessly. "Cole is...he's running himself ragged juggling so much. Our marriage, his job, his relationship with Jasper, the kids...and then he's always there trying to make sure I'm okay." She swallowed hard and wiped away her tears. "If I say anything about this, I'll just be adding more stress to our marriage. Besides, I'm supposed to be over Jasper, right? He's moving on and he's clearly over me. What would I even achieve by telling him all this?"

  My mind was so fucked right now. Like this was all too much to take in. Emotionally.

  I kept staring at Armaan and I'm not sure if it was a sixth sense or some sort of awareness he had of me but he looked my way with a frown, took in the scene and said something to the kids before running over to us. He was there in front of us soon, sweaty and a little breathless but saying all the right things to Skye as she cried softly while he held her as though she was a lost little girl.

  Maybe she was one in that moment. I was glad Aaru was there when my presence was pretty much useless. I smiled at him softly and he smiled back while rubbing Skye's shoulder.

  "It's okay," he was crooning to her. "It's okay, Skye. Do you want to come inside for a while? Maybe talk about it with me?"

  She sniffed and then nodded. My heart went out to her. She just needed someone. Anyone. How did the situation get so worse without any of us around her even realising what the core of the matter was? Jasper had said she was having a tough time but Skye Madison wasn't just having a tough time here...

  She was in love with Jasper.

  And it was tearing her apart.

  ****

  Chapter 13

  Jasper

  My boyfriend gave me a massage one night. A full body massage complete with candles and oil. I couldn't stop laughing in the middle of it all. He insisted on doing it because I had been working on the house all day while he had been busy spending time with the kids and Skye since it was his day off. I was exhausted from all that hard labour but he had come to my room and asked me to have sex with him.

  Rough sex.

  He specifically asked me to treat him roughly and make him do all kinds of dirty, depraved things and damn, I can't resist him when he's being like that so despite my bones screaming from exhaustion, I happily obliged because he seemed to really crave it. Cole was always so patient and good in every aspect of his life, giving so much of himself to others. I hardly saw him practising self-care. To wind down, he either read books or asked me to fuck him instead of just making love.

  So the massage was like a thank you to me. It started to feel good after a while. I guessed he was experienced in it from taking care of Skye all the time. I let out a satisfied groan as he kneaded the space between my shoulder blades. Fuck, all that hammering had taken its toll on me. And I didn't just mean the house.
<
br />   "Boy, you're good at this," I whispered, closing my eyes and smiling as though I was in a drug-induced haze.

  He leaned in and nibbled on my ear before pressing his lips to my jaw line. "Not laughing now, are we?" he teased in an indulgent voice.

  Turning my head to the side, I captured his lips with mine in a slow kiss. It wasn't sexual. I didn't think I had the energy to be sexual right now.

  "I love you, baby," I murmured in a sleepy voice.

  He rolled off me and I heard him blowing out the candles and putting all the bottles of oil away before settling in bed next to me.

  I forced myself to turn over onto my back and look at him. It didn't seem fair to just fuck, get a massage and then fall off to sleep. He'd go back to work in the morning and tomorrow night, he would be sleeping with Skye.

  "How are you doing, really?" I asked him.

  Cole had his phone out and had begun reading an ebook, his glasses firmly back on.

  "I'm okay," he said, reaching out with a hand and rubbing my arm without taking his eyes off the book.

  "How's Skye?"

  He smiled slightly. "She's doing much better. I don't know what happened but yesterday she was over at Armaan's place for a long time and when she came back, she seemed to be okay. Like she's trying to be better. She's the one who suggested we go to the city today after so long."

  I was glad to hear that. To know that she was trying. I wanted my family to be happy and that included the mother of my child.

  "Sometimes I can't help but think that...when you're here holding me at nights...then nobody's holding her," I said to him slowly. "She needs it more."

  I never interfered in Cole's relationship with Skye. Because I knew I didn't have to tell him how to be a good husband to her. He already was. But people had relapses all the time just when you thought they were getting better and I hoped Cole wouldn't just let things slide from now on.

  His response was to narrow his eyes at me and give me an amused look while he shook his foot casually.

  "Well if you're that worried," he began lazily, "You could always just join us in bed. Then I can hold both of you at the same time."

  I turned on my side facing away from him. Yeah, this wasn't the first time he had teased me about it. Cole would actually be the happiest guy on earth if the three of us ever did start sharing the same bed again.

  I realised it wasn't easy for him to split his time between two people equally. When you were sleeping with one, you missed the other, right? And such was his nature that he never complained about it.

  But even if I compromised and did it for his sake and even if Skye agreed to such an arrangement, it would only lead to more problems. More drama. I could give a lot of myself to someone who was important to me. But in return what I wanted from them was to let me be myself and not keep making me feel like I was letting them down. So I didn't reply to Cole's suggestion. He didn't realise it wasn't that easy.

  Sharing a bed wasn't the main issue here. Skye would always expect a lot from me because that was the kind of woman she was.

  And knowing the kind of man I was, I couldn't promise never to hurt her again.

  ****

  Chapter 14

  The house was done in the next couple of weeks. I ended up loving the hell out of it. Just a two-bedroom wooden structure with simple furnishings but incredibly easy on the eyes thanks to Cole and Armaan's designing inputs.

  It was my man-cave or Batcave as Cole liked to call it. I even painted it black and grey to go with my personality. First thing I did was break open an expensive bottle of scotch and celebrate with the guys. It had been months since my last drink and this was just such an occasion, even Armaan didn't refuse the toast.

  I realised that for the first time in a decade, I was going to have a place all to myself. Live alone.

  Maybe I was just used to the idea by now but it started to feel really good. Jacob slept over the first night in the bedroom that was especially for him. A strange sort of pride came over me as I said goodnight to him, left his door ajar and bunked on my living room couch in case he got spooked or something. I was going to share this place with my son. Just like Batman. It made me chuckle as I texted Cole for a while until he fell asleep.

  Jasmine came over the next day to give her opinions on the place and seemed to envy the shit out of me because my home was the only kid-free one in the area. I just laughed at her while she helped herself to my coffee.

  Funny how I'd been dreading this change for months but when it finally happened, I felt like I was free. Free to just be myself and love my son and Cole for the rest of my life. Even my boyfriend had to smile because he realised we'd been worried for nothing. Life was pretty good.

  ~~~~

  Skye gave birth to a baby girl a few months later. I didn't go to the hospital because our nanny was unavailable and I had to stay with the boys. When they came home with the baby who looked exactly like Jacob had looked the day he'd been born, I couldn't stop smiling.

  Another beautiful addition to our broken but awesome family.

  "We want you to name her," Skye said to me that night and I was taken aback by her words.

  She nodded at me with a smile. "Cole named Jacob and I named Ben. We wanted you to do the honours this time."

  Well, they should have said something before because I didn't know shit about choosing names.

  I thought about it that night and the next morning, I went to them and said, "Annabelle."

  Skye and Cole just looked at each other.

  I burst out laughing because I knew, I knew they were thinking of the horror movie those two nerds.

  Skye gave me a smack on the arm when she realised I was messing with them on purpose and Cole just shook his head.

  "Isabelle," I said for real this time and smiled at Skye. "Call her Isabelle Madison. I like it."

  They did too. Thank fuck because I probably would have gone with Annabelle if they hadn't objected. Names didn't really matter to me. She was going to be one of my people. That's all I cared about.

  The two kids from next door and the three from our family quickly became fast friends over time. Nobody left anyone behind when there were play dates.

  I started travelling again for work while Skye juggled her time between motherhood and career. The third time around, she got a handle on it which made Cole and I a couple of happy motherfuckers. It was always great to see your family doing well.

  Things had worked out for the best despite our move here having started with so many problems and hurdles.

  I slept with a few women every now and then when I travelled but by the time my son started to ask me a lot of questions about what I actually did whenever I went away, I kind of started to lose interest in casual sex.

  When Jacob turned five, we threw a huge party in the backyard. Everybody was invited; Jas, Armaan, the kids and some of our friends from work and the neighbourhood. My parents and Catherine came as well. Jacob was so happy, it hurt to look at him.

  I think I got a little too drunk that night. And Jasmine gave me some weed because she was smoking it and it had been years for me so I smoked it too just for the hell of it. Then I had to go inside my Batcave, taking the joint with me because my head started spinning.

  There was a knock on my door a while later. I stumbled over to it and found Skye outside.

  "Oh, hey," I slurred. "What's up?"

  She studied my face for a few seconds. "Can I come in?"

  I blinked at her. "That's probably not a good idea," I murmured.

  She inclined her head and regarded me curiously. "Why?" she asked.

  "I've just been smoking in here."

  Skye gave me a shrug. "I don't mind a bit of smoke."

  I raised my eyebrows at her. This was coming from the girl who once told me she hated the weed community.

  "No, I mean...it's not about that," I said slowly. "It's just...I'm high and drunk and I'm afraid I'll do something you're gonna make me regret."

&
nbsp; Where the fuck did those words just come out from? That could not have been my mouth because I wouldn't say things like that to Skye. I hadn't said things like that to her in years.

  Skye was giving me a thoughtful look.

  "Do something I'm going to make you regret," she dragged out, nodding to herself. "Good choice of words because you obviously won't be regretting anything on your own, huh?"

  I just looked at her with my mouth half open. What did she want? Why was she here? What was happening?

  Her hands came up to my shirt buttons, smoothing over them.

  "You know something, Jasper," she said in a matter-of-fact tone. "It's been three years. Five if you count the time you were away from us. And then that year we were all together when Cole brought me in your lives."

  Her lips formed a smile, her lemony scent which I had bought for her when she had been pregnant with Jacob and which she still wore teased my nostrils.

  "I'd say I've gotten to know you quite well in six years," she continued softly. "And I think...after seeing all of you, the good, the bad and the ugly, I know exactly what's got my husband so devoted to you."

  My heart was beating like a mother. She had no idea what she was saying.

  "Skye-"

  She pulled my head down and kissed me then and her lips pressing against mine after three fucking years set my body on fire. No. This was wrong. This...couldn't happen. We'd both accepted that years ago.

  "There's no taming you, Wells," Skye Madison murmured against my lips and then brought up a thumb to wipe her lipstick from my mouth. "I'm not even going to try anymore."

  Her arms went around me, her head rested on my chest.

  "Someone once told me not to measure a man's worth by his mistakes," she said softly as though she was about to cry. "I should've listened to her three years ago."