by Suzi Davis
“You know, I’ve tried so hard to get you to like me and it’s like you don’t even care. You’ve changed so much, Grace.”
“I have,” I agreed. “Sorry. But you’re wrong, I do like you.”
“No, you don’t,” Bridgette argued, her lips forming a pout. “You don’t care about anything that you used to: fashion, boys, travel, parties. You barely even listen to me when I talk. I’m trying so hard, Grace. I just want to be friends.”
“But, Bridgette, those things aren’t important to me anymore because they never really were. Look, you don’t have to try to impress me. I like you, I’ve always liked you. And I’m sorry if I haven’t been reading all your emails or paying enough attention to you, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings and I still don’t. I’ve just had a lot on my mind.” Bridgette didn’t look appeased. I continued on, hoping to distract her. “I can’t believe I didn’t know you’d graduated or that you were in an advanced academic program in high school! That’s really special—I wish I’d read that in your emails.”
“Yeah, well, I didn’t actually tell you about that before today,” Bridgette confessed. She gave me a shy smile. “I didn’t want you to know what a nerd I am.”
I rolled my eyes.
“Being smart doesn’t make you a nerd. You should be proud. Graduating nearly three years early and being a straight-A psychology student at university is a lot more interesting than any party you might have been to in Paris or Milan. Or at least, it is to me.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
She giggled. “I made up half those stories anyway.”
“Well, you didn’t need to. I would love to get to know the real you again. Don’t try and impress me anymore, please. I like you the best when you’re just you.”
“Ok. Thanks,” she smiled. “Do you think Nathaniel likes me?”
I paused, considering.
“Why shouldn’t he? You’re nice and friendly, I’m sure he considers you a friend.”
“But I don’t want to be just friends,” Bridgette objected. “I really like him, Grace.”
“Bridgette… he’s seven hundred years old,” I reminded her.
“So? Isn’t Sebastian nearly two thousand years older than you?” she shot back.
“Yes… but that’s different.”
“How?”
She waited expectantly, and when I didn’t immediately answer she launched back in.
“I really like him, Grace. I’ve liked him from the moment I saw him; I just feel this connection with him and I know you said the Lost Magic draws people together but, it’s different with him than anyone else. I’ve never had a real boyfriend or been in love before. When you were talking about Sebastian today in the van… it made me realize, that’s what I want. I want someone to love me like that. Do you think, maybe, there might be a chance Nathaniel could feel that way about me one day?” she asked hopefully.
“Of course it’s possible,” I assured her. “But, can I make a suggestion?”
“Sure.”
“Sebastian and I were friends for months before anything ever happened between us. We were really good friends, and our close friendship is what our whole relationship is based on. Be yourself and really get to know him, take it slow. The rest will all follow. I do think he likes you though,” I admitted. Bridgette grinned.
“Thanks. He’s so… he’s like no one I’ve ever met before,” she sighed. She stared dreamily out the window, falling into silence once more.
I relaxed back against my mattress and closed my eyes.
“There’s something else I need to tell you,” Bridgette confessed guiltily. I slowly reopened my eyes. “I haven’t been entirely honest with you. When I said in the van that I came here because I had a dream that I needed to find you, like the others all said, well… that wasn’t entirely true.”
“Ok. What is the truth?”
“I did have a dream but it wasn’t just a dream. You see, I have this friend back in Berlin, or I should say, I had a friend. We were pretty close, she was like a big sister to me. I used to visit her all the time but then a few months ago she went missing. No one seemed to care that she was missing except for me. No one ever looked for her and they never found her body but… I’m sure she died. I know she did, actually because, well…” Bridgette took a nervous breath. I sat up a little straighter. “Her spirit comes to me in my dreams sometimes. She was the one who told me I had to find you, that you would guide me to my destiny.”
My lips parted in surprise.
“Ok…”
“Yes, but that’s not all. This is the part that’s really crazy. But I think I can trust you, can’t I?”
“Of course,” I agreed, sitting all the way up now.
She slowly rose and crossed the room to where her suitcase sat on the floor. She began rummaging around in it.
“A few weeks before my friend went missing, she told me I had to leave town—she begged me to. She said her old boyfriend was coming back to Berlin and that she was pretty sure he was bringing trouble with him, dangerous people who were trying to hurt him and might hurt her too. She was afraid they’d hurt me if they found out we were friends so she made me promise I’d leave town for a few weeks. She was so insistent… I didn’t want to but I couldn’t say no. Before I left, she gave me something that she said would keep me safe. It was the last time I ever saw her,” Bridgette added sadly. Tears sparkled in her large, green eyes.
I watched warily as she reached into her suitcase and pulled out a long, thin object. As I realized what it was, I jumped back on my bed, my hand flying to the necklace at my throat. In the same instant, I gathered the Lost Magic around me, ready to use it against Bridgette to defend my life.
Bridgette turned the ancient, ceremonial knife over in her hand, her eyes still sad and shimmering with tears.
“She gave me this knife and she told me that if a girl named Caoilinn ever came to me, I should use this knife to protect myself against her, that she’d be afraid of it and that when the time came, I’d know what to do. But then, David called you Caoilinn and you said yourself, in the van, that you used to be her… so now I don’t know what to do. First she told me Caoilinn was dangerous but then she told me in my dream to go find you and that you’d help me. I don’t know why but she must have been wrong. I know I don’t need to protect myself from you; you’d never hurt me, would you?”
I stared at her in shock. I could barely process what she had just said. I swallowed hard, trying to find my voice. It all made sense. The spirit who had been visiting my dreams and Bridgette’s mysterious friend in Berlin were one and the same. A girl who had hated and mistrusted Caoilinn while she was alive but desperately wanted to help me and to save Sebastian after her death. It was her, it had to be. I knew it deep down in my soul.
“You don’t need to protect yourself from me. I would never hurt you like that but I’m afraid what I’m about to say now might hurt you, just in a different way,” I whispered, my voice tight. Bridgette took a step back, her eyes wide. “I’m so sorry, Bridgette, but you’re right, your friend is dead.”
“How do you know?” Bridgette demanded. Her hand that held the large, ornate knife was shaking, her eyes were sparkling brightly with the tears that flooded them.
“Because I was there when Mags died.”
Chapter Twelve – Last Breath
“How do you know her name?” Bridgette demanded. Her reaction was unexpected. Her whole body had tensed, her hand squeezed the large, silver knife handle tightly. She watched me through narrowed eyes.
“I used to know Mags,” I admitted. “Her old boyfriend that she told you about, that was Sebastian but he wasn’t really her boyfriend; he was actually her husband. And the trouble he brought with him back to Berlin… well, I guess that was me. Remember what I told you in the van, how the Others chased us across Europe until they finally caught up with us in Thessaloniki and took us to the Necromanteion? Well, Mags was with us when they cau
ght us, she was actually trying to help us then. But… they didn’t let her go.” I left out the part about how I had completely erased Mags’ memory so that she didn’t even know who she was anymore beyond her own name. I had acted rashly, out of anger and it wasn’t something I was proud of or something that Bridgette needed to know.
“Why didn’t they take her to the Necromanteion with you?” Bridgette blinked away disbelieving tears. I noticed her grip on the knife still hadn’t relaxed.
“She had made a deal with the Others, that she would turn me over to them and then they would let her and Sebastian go. Only, they had no intentions of ever following through with that plan. They wanted all three of us dead and they started with her. She was the one who helped Sebastian create the Others and they felt she had betrayed them. So they killed her.”
Bridgette stared back at me, her beautiful face expressionless and devoid of all emotion. Her eyes hardened.
“How did they do it?” she asked quietly.
“Are you sure you want to know?”
“Tell me.”
“She would have felt no pain,” I lied. How could I tell her that Mags had been tortured for hours, perhaps the better part of the day, before they finally killed her? “One of the Others, he snapped her neck. They burned down the building that her body was left in: a hostel near the center of Thessaloniki,” I tried to be as gentle as I could.
“Were Jai or Nathaniel involved in her death? Or David?”
“No,” I lied again. David hadn’t been there when Mags died even though it had occurred at his command. Jai was there but he had been acting under David’s orders, and it was Darius who had actually killed Mags. Maybe one day Bridgette would learn the truth but for now, I didn’t feel it was safe to tell her. I held her gaze as steadily as possible, until she seemed satisfied and dropped her eyes. She gently placed the knife on the bed between us.
“Mags hated Caoilinn and she hated me,” I confessed. “She blamed me for everything that had gone wrong, she saw me as her enemy. But we had some common ground. We both truly cared for Sebastian, we’d both do anything to keep him safe. And though we were never friends, I think we had reached a mutual understanding. We were no longer enemies but allies, fighting the same battle.”
Bridgette slowly nodded.
“Do you think if I tried to summon her, if I tried to call her to my dreams, she might come to me? I have so many questions.”
“You could try. Maybe we could even try together but… not now. I really am exhausted.”
“Right, sorry.” Bridgette blinked away her tears. “I knew she was dead but to hear it confirmed… To know how… You’re right, it was hard to hear. I think I’ll go down to the spa now. I could use a massage and some time to think. What should I do with the knife?”
“Keep it. It was Mags’ last gift to you.”
Bridgette nodded. She slipped it back into her bag and walked over to the door, hesitating in the doorway.
“I’m glad we talked, Grace.”
“Me too. I’m sorry about Mags. Are you sure you’re ok?”
“Yes, I will be.”
Alone in the room, I thought I would finally be able to rest but sleep eluded me. My head was swirling with thoughts and emotions, as dark and wild as the storm raging outside.
Why had Mags been spending time with Bridgette? What could her interest in her have been? She had obviously wanted to keep Bridgette away from not only the Others but also Sebastian and myself—but why? The dull, tired ache behind my eyes increased to a painful throb. I realized I wasn’t going to sleep; what I needed was some fresh air. I grabbed my coat and headed downstairs. The storm looked like it might be lightening a little and a walk on the beach was just what I needed to clear my head.
The rain had eased off by the time I made it outside and though thunder still rumbled in the distance and an occasional flash of lightning cracked through the sky, it wasn’t too bad outside. I made my way down a path on the rocky face of the point, carefully climbing down towards a small strip of beach below. The wind whipped at my face, freezing my skin and tangling my hair. As I climbed down lower, the rocks somewhat protected me from the wind and I was able to find a little shelter. I sat down on the smoothest part of rock I could find and gazed out over the white-capped waves. The water was almost as dark as the sky, the two barely distinguishable on the horizon as they blended into one another. Sebastian was out there somewhere, I realized. I prayed that he was safe, that he was holding on, that we would make it to him in time.
Tears danced in my eyes and a sob gathered in my chest. Cold, exhausted and finally alone, I no longer fought my tears.
“What are you doing?” David’s voice demanded as he suddenly appeared, climbing down the path above me.
I quickly wiped the moisture from my cheeks, glaring angrily out at the ocean.
“Nothing. I just want to be alone.”
“One of the sacrifices a leader must make: there’s always going to be someone seeking you, Caoilinn. Get used to it.”
“What do you want, David?” I had little patience for his games.
He jumped down onto the beach and took a seat on a rock near mine. I could feel him studying me.
“We got all the supplies we’ll need for our little wilderness excursion tomorrow. The others are all inside, enjoying the restaurant and the spa and whatever else there is to do here. I came out because I wanted to be alone as well.”
“Go find your own spot. This one’s taken,” I grumbled. “Why do you want to be alone anyway? I thought you’d want to spend time with Jai and Nathaniel, your old friends?”
“They were hardly ever my friends, and certainly not now.”
David gazed out at the dark waters stretching before us, offering no further explanation. To my great annoyance he didn’t appear to want to find his own spot, either. Maybe I should just get up and leave?
“You shouldn’t worry so much,” he suddenly commented to the air. “He’s going to be ok, you know.”
It took me a second to realize that he wasn’t criticizing me, he was actually trying to offer some kind of reassurance. I stared at him in surprise but he still wasn’t looking my way.
“What if he’s not?” I asked quietly.
“He’s a lot tougher than you realize and a lot more dangerous than they think. Even without magic, Sebastian is not someone to be taken lightly.” There was a hint of admiration to David’s voice. It made me think twice about him.
“Your perceptions of those around you are often quite naïve. There is more to a person than what you see on the surface, than what you think you know,” David mused, his black eyes almost perfect mirror images of the stormy sky. “Sometimes assumptions can be proven false. You might think twice about those around you and find a change of heart.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Take myself, for example. The time I spent with you and Sebastian, before you returned my memories to me, it has changed me in many ways, ways I could never have anticipated. Even though I can now remember my past hatred for Sebastian, I also have very clear and recent memories of admiring him, loving him even. And then there’s you, Grace. My feelings for you have certainly changed.”
We locked eyes and my heart skipped a beat.
“I’m not sure why you’re telling me this,” I said softly, suddenly nervous. Somehow he was able to hear me over the sound of the nearby crashing waves and the thunder rolling in the distance.
“You made me swear that I would give you my help,” he responded. He moved slowly, his movements fluid and graceful, deadly and dangerous as he came to sit right beside me. His eyes never broke their lock on mine. “I’m being helpful.”
“This is not helpful,” I argued, hating myself for sounding so breathless, for not moving away.
He smiled, his eyes crinkling at the edges. It was the first time I could remember seeing him smile like that, full of such playful innocence. It was both charming and completely disarming all at
once.
“Can’t I offer you comfort when you need it? Tell me then, where do we stand, Grace? Not quite enemies, yet not quite friends? Our relationship has been complicated in a way I never thought to imagine. Everything about you is… unexpected. I’m not sure what to do about this.”
“And what is ‘this’?” I held my breath nervously as I waited for him to answer. I didn’t know what I wanted him to say. I was so confused.
“This, us. It’s complicated. I never expected you to be a good leader. I never thought you would be someone I could follow. I didn’t anticipate the connection between us, this chemistry.” His eyes lit up, he leant closer towards me. My whole body tensed.
“I don’t know what chemistry you’re talking about,” I lied. I still couldn’t lean away.
“You do,” he murmured, his eyes staring deeply into mine. I’d never noticed how beautiful his eyes were, dark steely gray that I’d always thought of as hard but now they were pools of liquid silver.
“You should go.”
“If you really meant that, wouldn’t I already be gone?” His face was just inches from mine, his breathing shallow, his words surprisingly soft.
I felt so torn. I loved Sebastian, I knew I didn’t want anyone else but I was so tired and felt so alone. I was afraid to do this by myself and here was someone who could help me, who was dangerous and exciting, and handsome. And he wanted me. I knew it was wrong but for some strange reason, I couldn’t say no.
“Stop,” I whispered back to him but my words were lost on the wind. Lightning flashed overhead as he brought his lips against mine.
The wind swirled around us, icy and bitingly cold. Goosebumps tingled all over my skin as his mouth slowly pressed against mine. Kissing Sebastian had always felt so right, so warm and passionate and heady. But this was different, this was entirely new. David was dark and exciting, his passion sudden and intense and exhilarating. His hand in my hair gripped hard, his mouth was cool, his lips hungry, moving slowly and torturously with calculated precision that for some reason, I couldn’t help but respond to. The kiss only lasted for seconds, but when we broke apart, he had taken my breath away and left my heart pounding.