Lost in Bliss

by Lexi Blake

  “Do you think she’s right?” He’d made himself sick over this question. “Could we have been wrong while she was right?”

  “About de Sade? God, Cam, I’ve thought about that every single day. If I could change one thing in my life, it would be the way we handled that fucking profile, but Edward was sure.”

  Rafe’s whole face had aged in a minute. Lines formed on his forehead and around his mouth. This was why they hadn’t seen each other much in the last several years. Neither of them wanted to talk about what had happened. It had been easier to concentrate on finding Laura. They’d drifted apart because staying close had been painful.

  But why had it been that way? Why hadn’t they been able to talk about it? They’d managed to spend a lot of time drinking and fighting, but not once had they had an honest conversation about what had happened.

  “Even Joe went with Edward’s profile. There wasn’t enough evidence to push the notion that de Sade was law enforcement.” Cam hadn’t wanted to believe it, either. It was too horrifying to think about the possibility that one of their own could do that. He’d grasped on to Edward Lock’s alternative profile. He hadn’t meant to hurt Laura, but he’d truly believed what Edward had said.

  “Besides, after what happened with that reporter, can you still believe Laura was right?” Rafe asked.

  Cam couldn’t help the way his fists clenched when he thought of the Washington reporter who’d written a story on Laura’s profile. She had been a friend of Laura’s, a long-term friend, and she’d betrayed her for a headline. The story had hit the next day. Laura had been fired for leaking information, and twelve hours later, she’d been a guest of the Marquis de Sade.

  What if Cam had supported her? What if he’d put his career on the line to back her despite his own beliefs? She probably wouldn’t have felt the need to call her friend and commiserate. She wouldn’t have gotten drunk and confided in that vicious bitch. She wouldn’t have had her face plastered across the papers like a road map leading the killer straight to her.

  “I’ve read that letter a thousand times.” Cam straightened up. The Marquis de Sade, or someone claiming to be him, had sent a letter to the FBI and the reporter responsible for breaking the story, claiming he was insulted to be called law enforcement. He’d written a long diatribe on how he was smarter than any of them and the woman who insulted him would pay for her crime.

  “We’ve all gone over it a thousand times. The fact that de Sade took her because he was insulted she’d said he was in law enforcement fits Edward’s profile,” Rafe argued.

  But Cam had finally pulled out Laura’s profile a couple of months before. He’d been obsessing over it. And he’d been questioning the entire case. “Or he fits Laura’s profile and he’s trying to throw us off.”

  Rafe’s fist came down. “I’ve thought of that, too. This is getting us nowhere. We have to convince her to come home with us. She isn’t safe here. If she’s right, then she needs to be protected.”

  “I disagree. Not that she doesn’t need protection, but I think taking her back to DC is a mistake. He got to her in DC.”

  Rafe obviously wasn’t buying it. “And you think he can’t get to her here? Have you looked around this place? The door to her cabin was unlocked. There’s no way she should stay here.”

  “I’ll stay with her,” Cam offered. “I can protect her, and the sheriff was right. A stranger will stick out like a sore thumb here.”

  “This isn’t about protecting her, is it? This is how you plan to win.”

  He went toe-to-toe with his old friend. “I’m not trying to win anything. I’m trying to keep her alive. I think what you’re trying to do is have your cake and eat it, too. You want to haul her back to DC and turn her into a sweet little wife. She was never going to be your trophy, Rafe.”

  Rafe’s face went red. “She’s not a trophy. I never wanted her to get fired.”

  “But you thought it was a dangerous job for her.”

  “I was right. It was dangerous.”

  “She should have been at home baking cookies?” Cam asked, feeling his blood pressure rise.

  Rafe got right in his face. “Fuck you, Cam. How are you any better? You’re the one who wanted to get her pregnant. I had to remind you to wear a condom that night. Do you think I don’t know why you wanted to do that? You thought if you tied her to you, she would pick you.”

  He felt his whole body flush. He hadn’t meant to do that, had he? Sure, he’d thought about getting her pregnant, but he had just forgotten in the heat of the moment. Of course, after what had happened with de Sade, that wasn’t a problem anymore. He hated to think about everything that bastard had taken from her. “Well, it didn’t take long for that whole sharing thing to get tossed out, did it, Rafe? If you get her back to DC, we would always have to hide. No one would understand. I’m going to assume since you’re the one with the fancy job that you would be the one to legally marry her.”

  Rafe shrugged as though it was a forgone conclusion. “It makes sense. I make more than both of you combined. I seriously doubt the FBI will promote me if I’m flaunting the nation’s polygamy laws.”

  “And no one cares what I do?”

  “What do you want me to do? I can’t force society to accept what we want. I’m willing to sit down and work it out. There’s not a place in the world where we could live openly. It probably doesn’t matter anyway since she’s made it plain she doesn’t want to have anything to do with either one of us.”

  “Damn, brother. This is some entertaining shit.”

  Cam turned and saw two cowboys walking toward them with a red-haired woman in between them. One cowboy wore a black T-shirt and the other had on a denim Western-style shirt, but other than that they were perfectly identical.

  “Nate said they were going to be trouble, Max.”

  The one in the Western shirt shrugged. “I find trouble highly entertaining. Hey, you think I could get one of those boys to fight?”

  “Maxwell Harper, you promised me you wouldn’t try to start another fight until after Stef and Jen’s wedding.” The redhead with a baby in her arms gave the one named Max a dirty look. “I am serious, Max. I do not want Jen’s wedding pictures marred by you having a black eye. If that happens, I’ll substitute Rye in with Photoshop. And we will have a conversation, you and I.”

  The redhead started to stomp off.

  “But I like our conversations, baby!”

  She turned and stared at Cam for a moment as though assessing him. “If you hit him, you go for his gut. If you touch his face, I will find you. Do you understand me?”

  “Yes, ma’am,” Cam said immediately. Everything the redhead said had an air of Southern authority. Cam responded. He backed off of the cowboy who he had zero intention of fighting. It had the added effect of making him back off Rafe, whom he had kind of been planning to fight.

  The cowboy in the black T-shirt smiled. “You’re going to sleep on the couch tonight, brother.”

  “Damn, Rye, I wasn’t really going to fight. I promised Rach. You’re trying to get our wife all to yourself. When this edict of Rachel’s is no longer in effect, I’m going to kick your ass.”

  “Not if I kick yours first, Max.”

  “Stop, both of you,” Cam commanded. That was the second time some dude in this town had mentioned sharing a wife. “What do you mean by ‘our wife?’”

  Identical faces turned to him. Cam felt Rafe move beside him. All thoughts of beating the shit out of Rafe fled in a rush of curiosity.

  “Rachel, that hot redhead with the gorgeous baby, is our wife.” The man in the black T-shirt whom Max had called Rye crossed his arms over his chest. “And before you start calling in Johnny Law, you should know we do things differently in Bliss.”

  Max snorted. “What’s the sheriff going to do? Arrest us? How is he going to lock the cell door from the inside?”

  “Stop. Are you two talking about polygamy?” Rafe had a hand on his hip. It was his cop stance.
<
br />   Rye Harper didn’t seem scared. “The technical term for what we do is polyandry. And we’re perfectly legal. Max married Rach legally, and we’re not defrauding the government. We’re not illegal, just on the fringe of what society finds acceptable.”

  “No one cares in Bliss,” Max said with a questioning look aimed at his twin.

  “Yeah, well, Bliss isn’t exactly society,” Rye returned. “If we left Bliss, people would think we’re freaky.”

  “There’s no reason to leave Bliss anymore. Not since we got cable.”

  Rye turned to his brother. “I have a reason. Reliable cell service. I spent two hours on the landline trying to lodge a complaint with the company. Seriously, how long does it take to fix one tower?”

  “I don’t care about that,” Max said. “I don’t want to talk to anyone outside of Bliss. Hell, half the time I don’t want to talk to people inside Bliss. It’s all gossip. Rach spent thirty minutes on the phone with Callie talking about some weird plan Laura’s cooked up where she marries Wolf so two dudes don’t know she’s been alone for years.”

  A sly smile crossed Rye’s lips. “Yeah, now, I did hear about that. I heard those men had been looking for her for a real long time. It occurs to me that two men who spent all that time looking for a lady must have some pretty strong feelings for her, and a woman who hasn’t dated in a long time usually is hung up on a man—or two.”

  Cam went still. “Laura hasn’t dated anyone?”

  “Well, she did go out with Wolf,” Max replied. “But as far as I can remember, no one else. We were all surprised she said yes to him.”

  Rye shook his head. “Rachel wasn’t. Rachel told Jen that any woman in her right mind would be after him.”

  Max whistled. “Is that why you spanked her?”

  “Damn straight. But she knew I was listening. She even winked at me when she said it and slapped her own ass.” Rye adjusted his Stetson.

  Everyone in this town wore a hat. Cam’s own head was starting to feel bare. Damn, he hadn’t worn a cowboy hat in years, not since he left Arkansas.

  “She is getting saucier with age,” Max said with a grin. “Oh, well. There’s no way around it, Rye. She’s the boss of our family. What she says goes. We need to be careful. She told us not to give up Laura’s secret.”

  “I won’t tell. Now let’s get going, brother. That damn bear won’t eat himself.”

  Max elbowed his twin. “He damn near ate you. You were lucky the rangers came along when they did or Rach would be down a husband and little Paige would only have me for a dad.”

  The twin cowboys sauntered off talking about all the weird shit they planned on eating this evening.

  Rafe turned his head, a grin crinkling the corner of his mouth. “She’s not engaged.”

  A light happiness threatened to take over Cam’s body. She wasn’t engaged. She wasn’t even sleeping with him. According to those two cowboys, she hadn’t really dated for a long time, maybe since she’d left DC.

  “There’s only one real reason for a woman to lie like that,” Rafe continued.

  “She still has feelings for us,” he said, a smile spreading across his face. She’d lied to protect herself. “She still gives a damn, and we just landed in a place where no one is going to blink an eye if we share her. Hell, now I have to wonder how many of these people are in weird-ass relationships. I saw a girl wearing a collar in town.”

  Rafe shook his head. “Yeah. I’m still not sold on this place, but at least we can go after her without any shame. We can do it completely in the open.”

  Cam suddenly wanted to get started on that project. It was time to show Laura that he wasn’t going to wait another five years to get inside her again. He turned to his partner, all previous anger gone. They might have to revisit that fight, but not tonight. “What’s the plan?”

  Rafe leaned in and started to speak.

  * * * *

  Everyone was looking at her.

  Wolf twirled her around the dance floor, his big hand leading her this way and that in time to the music, but her focus was on the multitudinous eyes that tracked her.

  “Congratulations, you two!” Hank Farley said as he danced by with his wife. “You should know our barn is available for the reception.”

  “We’ll think about it,” Wolf said with an easy smile.

  He steered her toward the middle of the dance floor. Right where she didn’t want to be. Wolf seemed to be enjoying the attention far too much.

  “Laura, Wolf.” Stef Talbot held his fiancée in his arms as they swayed to the music. “Jennifer and I have talked about this, and we want to offer to include your own nuptials in our wedding. It can be a double ceremony. I’ll cover all the costs.”

  Jen Waters had a smirk on her face. “And Brooke said she can put together a dress in no time flat. We want to make this as easy on you as possible.”

  No, they didn’t. They were being righteous bastards. It was the whole damn town’s way of letting her know they disapproved of her lying. She wasn’t stupid. No one in Bliss would blink twice if she was lying to save a friend or protect herself from real harm, but the minute her heart got involved, everyone became a shrink.

  “They’re going to give you hell, you know,” Wolf said as he led her off the dance floor.

  “I’m beginning to see that. I’ve already received lectures from Marie and Stella on how I need to face my past if I ever want to move on.” Getting married had turned Stella into the world’s biggest authority on relationships. She was madly in love with Sebastian Talbot and wanted everyone in town to be as happy as she was.

  It was annoying.

  Even Mel had thrown his two cents in. Apparently lying left her open to alien death rays or something. And Cassidy had called to let Laura know that she didn’t appreciate her son being used as a beard and offered her other son’s counseling services. Laura wasn’t sure, but she might actually have an appointment with a man named Leo Meyer in Dallas to discuss her relationship issues.

  It wasn’t what she’d had planned. It was supposed to be a simple deception. Nothing was simple in Bliss.

  “You could come clean,” Wolf offered.

  Laura frowned. “They seem to be pushing me that way.”

  Wolf leaned against an empty picnic table. “That’s the trouble with family, isn’t it? They always think they know what’s best for you.”

  “And they think it’s best that the men who broke my heart know that I haven’t been with anyone since I left them? They think it’s best that I look utterly pathetic?”

  “I think they want you to not think of yourself as pathetic. I think these people love you, and they want you to love yourself. Whatever happened to you hurt you deeply. That’s not pathetic. They want you to see yourself the way they do. Do you know what they say about you?”

  Damn, tears were pricking at her eyes. “No.”

  “They say that you’re brave and you don’t hesitate to speak your mind. They admire you for that.”

  “I didn’t speak my mind before I came here. The one time I stood up for myself got me into serious trouble. It isn’t like the movies, you know. The FBI is like any other business. In the end, they want good soldiers who follow orders. It’s hard to do one thing all day and then come home and be a different person. After a while, the act seems like reality. Trying to fit in changes a person.” The only time she’d truly been herself was with her friends. With Rafe and Cam, she hadn’t needed that armor she put on during the day. She didn’t even think of Jana Evans. Jana had never been her friend. She’d been a reporter waiting for a story.

  “Well, I don’t think you’re the same person you are now that you were back then.”

  It was true. Bliss had changed her. The first couple of years had been rough. She hadn’t wanted to let anyone in, but they had wormed their way into her heart. Slowly, she’d become more open and willing to talk about her past, to mesh the woman she’d been with the woman she was becoming. She’d stopped hiding in
her cabin and talked to people.

  The truth of the matter was she was a bit surprised that Cam hadn’t found her. She’d kept off the radar as much as possible, using a fake social security number to work, but she’d talked openly about her life. She guessed Bliss was more isolated than she’d believed.

  “I don’t suppose anyone would be the same after what I went through.” Maybe it was time to be honest about it. She wasn’t sure she was ready to tell everyone what had happened, but she didn’t have much of a choice.

  “No, sweetheart, being betrayed by a friend and then captured by a serial killer would change the best of us.” He sighed at her gasp. “I can use a computer. I knew you lived in DC five years ago and you worked for the FBI. A quick Google search of Laura plus blonde plus FBI brought up a shocking number of prostitutes and your story.”

  She tried to recover from the shock. “Well, I’m glad the rest of my friends aren’t as tech savvy as you are.”

  “Oh, I wouldn’t count on it. I’m pretty sure the sheriff has figured it out, and if the sheriff knows, then Zane knows. I would bet that every man in this town knows to watch out for you. It’s the way they work.”

  The fact that the sheriff knew brought with it an odd mix of anxiety and security. She didn’t like the fact that her secret was out there, but the way the sheriff seemed to have handled it made her feel respected and protected. It was the way Bliss worked.

  “Hello, happy couple!”

  Holly walked up, a broad grin on her face. Nell and Henry followed. They wore their typical Big Game Dinner protest-wear of black pants and T-shirts with the words “Animals Have Voices, Too.” Their mouths had been duct-taped closed to show that these poor animals had been silenced forever. Despite their dark and brooding wardrobe choices, Nell’s eyes were lit with mirth, and Henry carried a bright yellow legal pad that he flashed quickly.

  Congrats on your fake engagement. I will give you a fake present! Here is a toaster.