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The Fallen

Page 14

by Ali Winters


  Now, she was done running and done hiding. Nivian sat utterly still for a long time and just let herself enjoy her space again.

  For the first hour, she’d half expected him to show up again. But when he didn’t, she finally let the aching tension in her shoulders ease—though she kept her senses alert. She stood and walked to the water’s edge and picked up a rock. It was cold against her skin, rounded, flat, and smoothed by water over time. Nivian brought her arm back and flung the stone. It skipped across the surface several times before sinking to the silty riverbed.

  A familiar darkness brushed up against her power, and she let her eyes slide closed at the delicate shiver it sent racing down her spine. Nivian turned toward the old arched bridge spanning the width of the river and opened her eyes. Caspian stood on the same side of the shore, watching her from a distance.

  She tilted her head to the side when he didn’t approach as usual.

  Nivian ran to him. It had been too long since she’d seen his face, and she hoped he wasn’t too put off with her avoiding him this past week.

  Nivian bounded as she reached him. Throwing her arms around his neck. He caught her and wrapped his arms around her waist, then squeezed tighter as he buried his face in the crook of her neck.

  “I’m sorry,” she murmured at last. “It wasn’t you, I just—” she stopped. She had to be careful of what she said. Admitting too much of the truth would cause the unthinkable for her family. And there was no telling how far Silas would go if she went against him. She couldn’t take that chance. “I wasn’t feeling like myself.” Part truth. She couldn’t bear to lie outright to his face.

  Caspian pulled back, eyes glistening in the dark. “What in Gaia’s name are you sorry about?”

  Nivian brushed a hand over his shoulder then up his neck to cup his face. Her thumb traced the high ridge of his cheekbone. “I… I’ve been avoiding this place. I swear it wasn’t you. Please don’t be upset with me.”

  A ghost of a smile tugged at his lips, but there was nothing happy in it. The expression conveyed only sorrow and pain.

  “Nothing you could ever do would upset me,” he said. Caspian rested his forehead against hers and ran his long fingers through the loose strands of her dark hair.

  Nivian pulled back, listing her head. Something in her core shifted at the look in his eyes. “Tell me what’s wrong,” she requested.

  Dark pools of obsidian pulled her into their inky depths. Hypnotizing. Nivian blinked. And then several feet of empty, cold air hovered between them. It might as well have been miles and miles separating them in that moment.

  Her gaze drifted to his hands, balled into fists at his sides. Something is definitely wrong.

  Nivian stepped forward until only an inch of space separated them. She craned her head back to meet his gaze. A lock of his hair had worked its way loose of its tie and fell across his forehead. She could see the thoughts that tormented him swirling in his gaze. She reached up and brushed it back behind his ear.

  Seconds later, he held her face in his hands, his lips crashed down on hers in a kiss that stole her breath. Hungry. Desperate. As if kissing her was the only thing keeping him tethered to this earth. It only took a second for the surprise to wear off before she kissed him back with equal fervor.

  One hand supported her neck as he deepened his kiss, tongue brushing against her own. His other arm wrapped tightly around her waist, crushing her body to his and lifting her slightly off her toes. Her fingers tangled in his hair, the leather tie coming undone and falling to the ground unnoticed.

  The heat of his touch turned her knees weak, until they buckled from beneath her. He followed, not willing to give up an inch of his hold on her. Together they kneeled, their chests pressed tightly against each other. Nivian wanted to be closer and cursed the distance their clothes placed between them.

  She didn’t want it to end. She needed this, needed to hold on to something good, to block out the impending darkness that hovered over her, and letting herself feel alive one last time.

  A groan escaped her lips as he pulled back, easing the kiss to something slower, lazy. Caspian trailed off, placing soft kisses against her lips, her jaw, her cheeks, her forehead.

  He let his arms loosen from around her and fall away. She was left breathless by the moment and wanted to protest the distance he placed between them. His own parted lips and the rise and fall of his chest echoed her own. It had affected him as much as it had her.

  Caspian stood and held out his hand. She eyed him from head to toe, disappointed that the moment had ended so quickly. Reluctantly, Nivian took his hand and let him help her to her feet.

  “Can we walk along the river?” he asked and, when her eyes narrowed, he added, “I just want to walk with you for a little while and enjoy the night. Then…” his voice tightened, the knot of his throat bobbing. “Then I will tell you everything.”

  Nivian nodded. She longed to tell him everything as well, but she would take these few moments of peace before Silas came to take everything from her.

  He squeezed her hand gently, drawing her attention to his questioning gaze. “You’re crying.”

  She sucked in a breath and swiped at her face with both hands, letting out a hoarse laugh that sounded a little too strained to be genuine, even to her own ears.

  “Sorry, I just—” She shook her head. “It’s been lonely this past week with my family gone on assignment. And then not seeing you…”

  Caspian took her hand again then said, “I am here now. You don’t have to be alone anymore.”

  “Thank you,” was all she said.

  Nivian rested her head against his shoulder as they walked, their fingers entwined. She breathed out a long sigh. Though she spent much of her free time alone for most of her existence, this Dark Guardian had somehow brought out in her a need for company she had always thought she’d lacked.

  The cold nights and the heat of the day had dried the grass that crunched beneath their feet as they walked. When they reached the bridge, he turned their path to cross and stopped in the center. Nivian watched their reflection in the glassy surface of the water below, their forms outlined by the silvery light of the moon. The water, high from one of the recent rainfalls, nearly touched the bottom of the footbridge. Several droplets splashed up, slicking the wooden surface. After a long moment, Nivian and Caspian continued on toward the far bank.

  “I,” he started but then clamped his mouth shut. He turned to face her. “I should go,” he said. Though he tried to hide it, pain still laced his words. He pulled away before she could protest and walked back the way he had come, stopping after several feet.

  She stared after him, too shocked to demand he tell her why he was acting so strange, why he looked as if he had the weight of all the realms on his mind.

  Caspian didn’t turn to look at her as he said, “I am always on your side, Nivi.”

  Cold air caressed her skin, colder than before now with his warmth absent. Then he started walking again.

  “Wait,” she said quietly, yet he kept moving farther away. “Stop!” Nivian ran after him, catching him as he neared the center of the bridge once more. Nivian stopped in front of him, pressing her hand against his chest and pushing him back toward the center, pleading for him to stay. Nivian glared. “I know something is wrong. Please… confide in me? Let me know what weighs so heavy on your shoulders.”

  Dark clouds moved across the moon, casting shadows over his face. “Nivi, I don’t know how… I can’t…” He gripped her shoulders tightly with his large, strong hands. “It kills me to know that once I tell you, I will never see you look at me like this again.”

  “Caspian, just say it. You’re scaring me.” The icy fingers of fear crawled down her spine.

  His grip tightened, then he spoke, slow and measured, “I have been assigned to reap you.”

  Her breath left her in a painful whoosh, and she stumbled backward. Caspian took a step closer and reached for her, but she slapped his hand
away. He recoiled, as if he’d been burned.

  Her mouth dropped open and Nivian stared and stared at this man she thought she knew, this man who, in a second’s time, had become a stranger.

  No… it was supposed to be Silas. Silas, not Caspian. Her hand flew to her chest, gripping the material of her tunic. She clawed at it, suddenly unable to breathe.

  “You?” she hissed through her teeth. He wasn’t who she thought he was. A sickening feeling twisted her gut as her blood began to boil. “Was all of this a ruse? Forge a friendship to make the killing blow easier. The stupid Watcher won’t know what hit her,” she mocked.

  “You have to listen to me, Nivian,” Caspian pleaded. The look on his face so sincere. But it was a lie. It was all just one elaborate and cruel lie.

  “No, I don’t want to hear more of your lies! You are mistaken if you believed I wouldn’t fight back because you made me care for you.” Tears burned her eyes then slid down her face in hot rivulets, but she made no move to wipe them away. “You are a monster,” she bit out. “I trusted you.”

  Her heart shattered, her gut clenched, and a wave of dizziness washed over her. If her body hadn’t been frozen in place, she would have collapsed to her hands and knees and heaved until there was nothing left.

  “Nivian, no, it was never like that.” Caspian held his hands in front of him, motioning for her to calm down. But she wouldn’t. She wouldn’t lie down and give up. She would destroy him as he severed her life force.

  A familiar voice called her name, but the roaring of blood in her ears, the relentless drumming of her heart, drowned it out.

  He took her strange nature, her desire for peace, and used it against her. Twisted it until he made her believe in his lies. And now his deception was exposed. Caspian had to know of Silas’s plans from the start.

  “None of it was real,” she spoke, more to herself than to him.

  “It was all real. You mean everything to me—”

  Her head shot up, fresh tears blurring her vision. “Shut your mouth!” she snapped.

  Nivian took a step back as he moved forward. The last thing she could stomach was his touch after he openly admitted to betraying her. A wave of fire sparked in her chest. She could still feel the soft caress of his mouth upon hers.

  Her hands balled into fists at her sides, and she called to her powers. They lit up the space between them, throwing long shadows across the surface of the dark water.

  A pained expression crossed his face as he lifted a hand, his fingers reaching for her, then, with a small flourish of his fingers, an orb of dark energy formed within his palm.

  The water below picked up speed, the rushing of it louder, threatening to drown out her thoughts.

  “You have no idea how much this pains me—”

  Nivian barked out a sharp laugh. “You will find no pity from me,” she said.

  “You have been marked by the Tome of Fate.” Silas’s voice came back to her, and her grasp on her powers slipped as she took another step back.

  She was marked. She would die. If she didn’t allow Caspian to take her now, Silas would only come later to claim her… and everyone she loved. She was marked, but that did not mean should would forgive Caspian for playing with her heart.

  “I hate you,” she said. And she did. She hated him for betraying her. For making her love him so he could weaken her defenses and come for her. It went against her nature to stand down and refuse to fight. But maybe… maybe she could take Caspian with her. Destroy him as he took her life force.

  A flicker of movement caught her eye. Caspian still held his power in his outstretched hand, but his other… that hand had moved.

  She heard the splash of water hit the bridge behind her. So, this is how he planned to do it. Nivian closed her eyes and took one more step back as she let loose her power.

  Time slowed. Nivian watched as he twisted his body, the slightest of movements, and both of her attacks missed. Her aim had not been true. Her traitorous heart had made her flinch, had made her attack weak and slow.

  The world tilted and, for a long second, she was weightless with nothing but the rush of the river.

  The clouds had vanished. The black sky pocked with pin pricks of stars above, the only ones to witness her death.

  Caspian’s fingers brushed against her chest. It was enough to slow her fall but not stop it. The howling wolf broach ripped free of her cloak.

  Her name formed on his lips, but his cry was lost to her. He flung the broach down and reached for her again.

  Too late… he was too late.

  The metal clanking on the bridge was the last sound she heard before the icy water swallowed her up.

  NIVIAN

  THE STINGING PAIN of cold surrounded her, kicking every last bit of air from her lungs. Nivian kicked her feet and reached for the surface.

  Then she stilled.

  Gaia, she wanted to fight, wanted to swim away and save herself, to fight this man she had come to care for, had come to… love.

  But her sisters. Her mother. Finn. Every other Watcher. There was no way to tell how far Silas would go in retribution for her defiance. They didn’t deserve this fate. And only she had been marked.

  To die now or later, it didn’t matter, her life was on a timer. The only thing she could do to save them all, was to let Caspian win.

  She stopped fighting completely and let the weight of her water soaked cloak pull her down, down, down, into the dark depths of the river.

  Nivian’s lungs burned like wildfire as she held her breath, refusing to let the water in yet fighting her body’s instinct to gasp for air.

  The moon’s watery light pierced the surface, sending beams to illuminate the specks of debris floating and swaying peacefully before her eyes.

  As she sank deeper, the pressure weighed her down. A few bubbles filtered through her lips.

  Fear gripped her and pulled her further into an unmoving prison. Mercifully, the cold slowly seized every bit of feeling from her body, numbing the pain. Her energy quickly waned as the painful chill seeped its way into every inch of her, down to the marrow of her bones. Would she freeze or drown?

  Her eyes grew heavy, sliding closed. She tried to open them, but they refused to obey her commands.

  Nivian opened her mouth to call out for Caspian, to beg him to save her, even knowing what he’d been sent to do.

  But only a flood of water greeted her as a flurry of bubbles danced their way to the surface. Her eyes snapped open. Helpless. She was helpless, struggling to move, to breathe, to think… helpless to change her fate.

  A shadow moved above in the shape of a man. Caspian stood on the water just above her head. He bent at the waist and reached a hand toward her. She didn’t understand. Pulling her out now would… save her.

  Her lungs screamed, threatening to explode as she only took in more water. Nivian wanted to reach for him. She wanted to live for at least one more day.

  It was all she could do to force every thought down and away, save for one. Do not fight. Do not fight. Do not fight.

  A wave of disorientation rolled over her as her body began to rise. Caspian’s magic surrounded her, pulled her toward the surface. He had to know that she was dying but not yet dead. That if he pulled her from the water now, she would still live.

  No.

  Nivian struggled against him, but her body refused to fight. Her mind and her heart knew what her fate had to be, though it went against every instinct built into every cell of her body.

  She pushed what little remaining power she had at him, loosening his hold. The world rightened once more and she continued to fall. Darkness moved in and swallowed her vision. The pain faded entirely, the cold had finally stolen all feeling.

  With one last, clumsy effort, Nivian raised her arms up through the water, pushing herself even deeper. Away from his saving grasp.

  Through the murk, a flicker of gold flashed. Her head listed toward the warm light. A thin string floated around her, growing
longer, weaving its way up toward the surface, even as her body continued to sink.

  Nivian’s thoughts faded into barely recognizable feelings and sensations. Disconnected. Strange and alien.

  Her life thread danced through the current until it was all she could see, all she could understand. Then, a flash of silver she instinctively knew belonged to the blade of a scythe.

  Her life dissolved into nothing.

  She became nothing.

  And only darkness remained.

  CASPIAN

  He thrust his hand down into the water, reaching for her. Her form grew dimmer as she sank farther below, and he could have sworn that for a second, her dark chestnut eyes had stared back at him. Accusing him. He had betrayed her.

  Caspian’s heart leaped into his throat. He would rather let Silas destroy him than reap Nivian. He could feel the fissure forming along the plains of his heart. Cracking and crumbling as it broke right then and there from the truth in her eyes. The anger. The hate. The pain…

  But if he allowed himself to stop, then another Guardian would take his place, someone who would jump at the chance to make a Watcher suffer. Caspian gritted his teeth.

  He stretched out his powers, down through the water, reaching for her. The tendrils of magic slowed her descent, but she continued to move away, as if she intentionally blocked his attempt. So instead, he stole what pain and discomfort he could.

  Caspian pulled and grasped and fought to keep hold of her, to keep her from sinking to the silty bottom. A flicker of gold, so small, so pale at first, formed at the center of her chest.

  So it was too late… He bit back the wave of panic and let his instincts take over, calling up the life thread. It swirled and wove through the water, circling her once. Twice. Then moved upward, following the strands of his power.

  He could feel her slipping away from him in every way.

  His breath stopped as his eyes locked on Nivian’s brilliant life thread, fully exposed and vulnerable. It left her body and his heart shattered into infinite pieces.

 

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