‘What’s happened?’ Betsy asked as Lara unlocked the gate and let her in. ‘Are you alright? I phoned you and you didn’t answer, so I had to start shouting through the letter box… Have you just woken up?’
‘My phone must have been downstairs. I think I forgot to take it up with me when I went to bed so my alarm wasn’t set.’
‘You didn’t set your alarm? But you’re OK?’
‘I’m fine. I’m sorry if you were worried.’
‘Honestly, I nearly called the police. I thought you might be dead or something.’
‘I’m glad you didn’t,’ Lara said wryly. ‘I don’t think oversleeping counts as serious crime.’
Betsy threw her a sideways look. ‘You look like a serious crime. You look like someone dragged you round a pub car park by your hair.’
‘Thank you!’ Lara laughed. ‘Charming!’
‘But you’re usually so tidy with make-up and everything.’
‘Well, I’ve just got up – what do you expect? If it’s OK with you I’ll go and get a quick wash and tidy up while you make a start in the office.’
‘OK,’ Betsy said, though she was still eyeing Lara with a hint of suspicion. ‘What happened last night?’
‘Nothing happened last night. Why?’
‘You didn’t set your alarm.’
‘I know.’
‘You always set your alarm.’
‘I forgot.’
‘You never forget. You’ve never forgotten all the time I’ve been working for you.’
‘Well, it just goes to show that even I’m not perfect.’
‘Yes you are.’
‘I’m really not,’ Lara said. ‘You can trust me on that one.’
Lara meant her remark with heartfelt sincerity. She was far from perfect, and if Betsy needed proof of that, Lara would only have to point out the actions of the previous night. There had been vague, nebulous thoughts that she might later regret what she’d done with Theo. Right now, as she stood in the garden with the morning sun on her face, the bright light of that daytime star seemed to examine her more fiercely than even Betsy, and those thoughts came rushing back. And rather than whispering in the heat of the moment, they were now shouting for her full attention. He was there, in the house now, in her bed, and really she knew nothing about him. Sure, she knew every inch of his skin, how he tasted, the smell of him, what his breath sounded like as he drifted to sleep, but she didn’t know him at all. Maybe regrets and consequences wouldn’t be ignored so easily after all. Maybe, before this went further, she needed to address them.
‘Want me to make some drinks while you get ready?’ Betsy asked. ‘We’ve still got breakfast muffins too.’
‘No!’ Lara said, though she was aware it perhaps sounded like an overly hasty response. ‘It’s fine. I won’t be long – I’ll make drinks and bring them out when I’m done. The muffins sound good, though – I’m starving.’
‘Did you do a lot of exercise last night then?’ Betsy asked. Her face was the very picture of innocence as Lara turned and gave her a sharp look. Was there really a subtext here, a subtle innuendo, or was Lara imagining it?
‘I think I’m just having a hungry day,’ she replied.
‘Right,’ Betsy said slowly. ‘So it’s nothing to do with that man at your kitchen window with Fluffy in his arms?’
Lara sucked in a breath as she spun to see a shirtless Theo wave at her. ‘For God’s sake!’
‘He’s cute,’ Betsy said.
‘He’s in big trouble,’ Lara shot back, marching towards the house.
‘What are you doing?’ she demanded once she was inside, glancing back to see Betsy watching them from the garden.
‘You said I could get toast.’
‘I also said not to let Betsy see you!’
‘I didn’t know she’d be right there when I came down. Anyway, I don’t see what the problem is. And Satchmo wanted to say hello,’ he added, picking up the cat’s paw and making him wave at Lara.
Lara ignored the fact that he was still calling their cat Satchmo, because for all they’d said about him living exclusively with Lara, there was no way that was ever going to happen. Fluffy would certainly have ideas of his own, no matter what she or Theo tried to impose on him.
‘It’s just… well… it’s not really a thing yet, is it?’
‘I still don’t see your point.’
‘It looks bad, doesn’t it?’
Theo raised his eyebrows. ‘Does it? How? Even “things” have to begin somewhere. Even “things” start with a first night. And anyway, I thought we were going to talk about the “thing” thing later?’
Lara glanced out to the garden again. Betsy had apparently decided that watching them have a conversation that she couldn’t hear was boring and had gone into the office.
‘Is that where you work?’ Theo asked as he followed her gaze.
‘Yes.’
‘It’s cool.’
Lara couldn’t help but smile now. It was cool. She loved her little garden office, she loved her little house and her business, and she was proud of what she’d built here.
‘Can I look?’ he asked. He let Fluffy down and dropped some bread into the toaster.
‘Maybe later,’ Lara said. ‘If Betsy’s working I don’t want to disturb her.’
‘OK. Later when?’ He rested his elbows on the kitchen worktop, chin on his hands as he watched the toaster like a little kid waiting for grandma to finish baking his favourite cake. There was no doubt that when he wasn’t being a smug pain in the arse he could be very sweet, his gestures endearing.
But none of this had figured in her plans and right now Lara didn’t know how she felt about it. Last night she’d been more certain, focused on her needs, acting on her desires, but had that been a mistake? She was only human, and had it been so wrong to want to satisfy her needs? They’d had fun, hadn’t they? They’d had a great time. But now it was all talks and relationships and it was moving way faster than Lara could keep up with. But she couldn’t tell him not to come back later – not after he’d opened his heart to her, not after what he’d told her upstairs only a few moments before. He’d slept with her because he really liked her, that was what he’d said. God knew why, because even she had to admit she’d been vile to him, but she knew it was true nonetheless. The proof had been in his eyes, in the way he’d shown his true self when he’d turned up with Fluffy to give him up to her.
‘You don’t have any work tonight?’ she asked.
‘Not tonight. Most of our bookings are at weekends. Occasionally we do an open mic night midweek but it depends on who else is going. I don’t think it’s happening tonight.’
‘Right…’ Lara said. ‘I’m just not sure how much work I’ve got on today and what time I’ll be finished. To be honest, I had stuff on last night but I didn’t get round to it for one reason or another.’
‘Yeah?’ he asked, straightening up and puffing out his bare chest. ‘And why would that be?’
Lara laughed. ‘Well, maybe the arrival of a certain man didn’t help. I had other stuff going on too.’
Her mind went back to Lucien’s text. Had it really only been twenty-four hours since she’d received it? So much had happened since then she almost felt like that version of Lara Nightingale was someone completely different living a strange, parallel life. Theo had arrived and she’d split into two people, and this new Lara had been created.
But Lucien’s message still troubled her because of what it might lead to, because she could foresee complications and because – despite what Siobhan had done to Lara, despite what she might say to anyone else – she still didn’t really believe that her friend deserved it. Siobhan had betrayed Lara in the worst way possible, but it had been for perhaps the best reason in the world – love. She’d fallen in love with Lucien – she’d said it and Lara had no reason to doubt it was true. What she often doubted was whether it was fully reciprocated. Lucien would have been attracted to Siobhan the way he was
attracted to a designer jacket or an expensive watch – a shiny, glamorous accessory to show off. But did he love her? Lara doubted he was even capable of loving anyone but himself. Now, there was a love affair to rival the greatest of them all.
‘You sound like a workaholic,’ he said.
‘It wasn’t work.’
‘Ah. If you tell me, will you be forced to kill me?’
‘Something like that.’
‘Can I ask questions and guess it myself?’
‘It’s not a game, Theo.’
‘I know. I just want to know what I’m dealing with. Will it affect our “thing”?’
‘I hope not.’
‘It’s to do with what you told me about the night Satchmo came to you?’
‘Yes.’
‘Hmm. Just one more question. Is there a man involved?’
‘Yes.’
The toast popped up and he didn’t say anything else as he took it from the toaster to butter it. Lara wanted him to say something. She wanted to know what he was thinking, but for once she didn’t ask. Did she look like damaged goods now? Did she look like hard work?
‘We’re not together now, though, if that’s what you’re worried about,’ she added. ‘What we did last night wouldn’t count as an affair or anything.’
‘Right.’
‘It’s just…’
Don’t pick the scab, Lara.
For once, she followed her own advice and resisted the temptation to open a conversation that might not end well. They’d had a great night and they were getting on well now – why spoil it by complicating what could be that simple?
‘There’s orange juice in the fridge,’ she said. ‘Help yourself. I’m going to grab a quick shower.’
As she made her way upstairs, she heard him shout from the kitchen. ‘Need some assistance with the soap?’
‘No!’ she called back and had to laugh at the sound of him chuckling.
‘Do you think he’ll want one of my mum’s muffins?’ Betsy asked when Lara eventually reached the office.
‘He’ll be leaving soon,’ Lara said briskly. ‘He’s eaten half of my bread already – I’m sure he’ll be fine without a muffin.’
‘But we have spare.’
Lara looked at Betsy. ‘Are you just dreaming up excuses to get a better look at him? He’s nothing out of the ordinary, you know – just a regular man.’
‘Yes, but you don’t date men. Ever. So he must be a little bit special.’
Lara cleared her throat loudly to signify that this topic was off limits.
‘It’s true,’ Betsy continued. ‘This is the first time I’ve ever seen you with a man.’
‘You’re not with me twenty-four-seven, are you?’
‘No, but you don’t even mention anyone. Apart from your ex and that cat guy…’ Betsy’s eyes widened. ‘It’s not your ex, is it?’
‘No!’ Lara fired back. ‘How stupid do you think I am?’
At this, Betsy had the decency to blush. But immediately, Lara wondered whether she’d been too harsh. Perhaps if Betsy had been as preoccupied with an ex as Lara was forced to admit she had been with Lucien, she might have suspected the odd lapse in judgement in that regard too. It wasn’t such a stretch of the imagination to suppose that there was a danger of Lara falling back into bed with Lucien – both figuratively and quite literally.
‘It’s not Lucien,’ Lara clarified and she was going to leave it at that. But then she sighed. What was the point in trying to keep secrets when – if Theo was to start appearing there more regularly – Betsy would find out soon enough anyway? ‘It’s the cat guy.’
‘No!’ Betsy’s mouth was a perfect circle of surprise. ‘Oh my God!’
Lara turned her computer on, determined not to blush or squirm or show any kind of regret or shame or any of the other emotions that niggled at the back of her mind. She’d spent the night with Theo – so what? They were both consenting adults who happened to find each other attractive despite their very obvious personality mismatch and various past disagreements. Why shouldn’t they have sex if they wanted to?
‘What a legend!’ Betsy exclaimed.
‘No, it’s an example I urge you not to follow,’ Lara said.
Betsy frowned. And then it turned into a grin. ‘Wait… This was a one-night stand?’
Lara put her head down to examine her keyboard more closely, her face glowing.
‘Oh, Lara!’ Betsy squeaked. ‘That’s—’
‘That’s enough,’ Lara cut in. ‘Private is private and work is work.’
She looked up to see Betsy’s grin fade. If anything, she looked hurt now, but Lara was too embarrassed to care. She didn’t want to discuss this with anyone, certainly not with Betsy, who wouldn’t really understand. When she thought about it, Lara herself still didn’t really understand.
‘I’m sorry,’ Betsy said in a small voice. Now she’d gone from looking a little hurt to genuinely mortified.
‘Let’s say no more about it,’ Lara replied, feeling like a total bitch now. ‘I realise it was a bit of a shock for you to arrive this morning and find Theo here and I… Well, it wasn’t exactly professional of me not to be here for you. But we’ve got a busy day ahead and we need to get on.’
Betsy gave a silent nod and turned to her computer, clearly not daring to push the matter further now that she’d been put in her place, content that Lara had drawn a line under the matter for both of them.
‘There’s one good thing to come out of it,’ Lara added in a breezier tone. ‘Fiona Wilson will be getting her band.’
Betsy looked up again and Lara was smiling slightly. ‘The things I do to make a client happy, eh?’
Betsy looked as if she wanted to laugh but wasn’t sure if she was allowed. So Lara did it for her, and the tension lifted from the room like mist rising from a dewy dawn field.
But Betsy didn’t laugh. She started to cry. Lara leapt up from her seat and rushed around the desk to put an arm around her.
‘Oh, Betsy,’ she said. ‘I didn’t mean to upset you! I’m so sorry!’
Betsy shook her head. ‘It’s not you.’
‘Then what is it? You were fine not five minutes ago.’
‘I… I don’t know,’ Betsy sniffed. ‘I just… I can’t help it.’
‘Do you need to go for a walk? Take a break, get some air?’
‘No thank you.’
‘Do you need to go home? Are you ill? Is there something going on at home that’s upset you?’
‘No.’
Lara looked to the heavens for inspiration but found none there. Feeling helpless and confused by her sudden change in mood, she rubbed Betsy’s back and tried her best to soothe her. One minute she’d been fine – laughing and teasing – the next minute inconsolable. What had brought it on? If it wasn’t about what Lara had said then what else? Was this what it was like being eighteen? Lara felt like being eighteen was a million years in her past but she didn’t recall it being quite that fraught.
‘Is it work?’ she asked, still trying to figure it out. ‘Is it me? Is it because we haven’t sorted your pay rise yet? Is it about this morning? Because if it’s that I am sorry; you just caught me in a bit of an awkward spot and I felt as if you shouldn’t have had to see that, and it really isn’t your fault—’
‘No,’ Betsy said. ‘It’s not any of that at all. I think maybe I would have cried anyway, but you just shouted a little bit and that just set me off. But it would have happened anyway because I woke up feeling like I wanted to cry. If anything, you cheered me up really.’
Betsy had managed to contradict herself on almost every beat of her speech but Lara let it go at that. She made a sympathetic face. ‘Some days we all feel like that.’
‘I expect it’s hormones or something,’ Betsy said.
‘How about I get us some drinks while you take a minute?’
‘It’s my turn to get them,’ Betsy said.
Lara raised her eyebrows, prompting a watery smile fr
om her.
‘I wouldn’t talk to Theo,’ she added.
‘No, but I’m afraid Theo would talk to you and he’d find it all very amusing. I’ll get the drinks this time – you can do this afternoon’s round when he’s gone.’
Betsy nodded. ‘I won’t tell anyone about him if you don’t want me to.’
‘Just for now, I’d appreciate that. It’s early days and I’m not quite sure of any future there might be.’
‘So it wasn’t just one night? You’re going to see him again? I thought you couldn’t stand him?’
‘It’s a funny thing, that,’ Lara said as she made her way to the door. ‘So did I.’
Theo had left her with a smiley face drawn into a dusting of sugar on her kitchen worktop. Lara should have been annoyed about it when she’d come into the kitchen at lunchtime to find him gone and his little message the only sign that he’d been there at all, but she wasn’t. She smiled at it and couldn’t bring herself to clear it away.
He’d also washed Fluffy’s bowl and put fresh food out. Fluffy, of course, had completely ignored it and was currently curled up on a seat cushion, probably expecting Lara to throw Theo’s food away later and put even more fresh out. She’d do it as well, because Fluffy was the real boss around here no matter what anyone else thought.
When Lara went upstairs, she found that the towels in the bathroom had been folded and the bed had been made. Sexy and tidy, Lara thought. Have I actually dreamt up my perfect man? But then she reflected that most of the time his irreverent humour and sharp-tongued quips drove her to distraction, and unless the deepest desires of her unconscious mind were also deeply masochistic, then no, she definitely hadn’t dreamt him up.
In the rush (mostly to tear each other’s clothes off) they’d never had a chance to exchange phone numbers, and so Theo had called the office phone late afternoon to see if Lara still wanted to meet that evening. Lara tried to keep the conversation and her tone neutral, certain that Betsy was doing her best to look as if she wasn’t listening when she obviously was, and in this entirely casual way they’d arranged for him to arrive at eight. She’d put the phone down, still casual, even though there were fireworks going off inside her.
The Break Up: The perfect heartwarming romantic comedy Page 16