Fade to Black

by Unknown

  Her hand again moved over her son. “It’s not enough, Rich. I’m sorry.” She walked away from him, glad to have the crowd swallow her up. Yes, she loved him. Adored him. Couldn’t imagine her life without him in it. But it wasn’t enough.

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  They finished their story and were headed back to the truck when Rich stopped. “You can’t ignore me forever, Kate.”

  “Who said I was ignoring you?” she asked without looking at him—or even slowing her pace.

  Let her walk, Rich thought smugly, reaching into his pocket to palm the keys. Eventually she might stumble onto the locked vehicle and then she wouldn’t have any other choice than to wait for him.

  It didn’t take long though. When she realized that her puppy had slipped its leash, she turned. Rich shrugged. “Nobody had to tell me, Kate, your lack of words is telling enough. Hell, if you hadn’t had to speak to me today, you wouldn’t have. I’m not a complete idiot.”

  She crossed her arms over her chest, where they rested on her belly. “I never said you were an idiot.”

  “You’ve sure as hell done your best to make me feel like one,” he muttered under his breath.

  Kate rolled her eyes and huffed with irritated audacity. Her arms were still folded tightly across her front as she turned her back and walked away. She stomped three steps, then stopped.

  Rich slowly moved to her side but didn’t stop, just walked past her. He snorted. “You don’t know where the truck is, huh?” he mocked.

  “You think you’re so funny, don’t you?”

  “No, not funny,” he said with amusement oozing through the words, “I just really like being right.” He couldn’t hide the smug smile, not that he tried.

  The two of them were quiet as they walked the few blocks to where the white Ford Explorer was parked. Rich hit the locks and the lights flashed. Kate slid into the passenger seat and closed the door with a poignant slam. Rich put the camera in the back, a whistle on his lips. He climbed behind the wheel and turned the key. The truck’s engine came to life, and Kate reached for the radio, turning it up to an uncomfortable volume before she turned toward the window.

  “I’m guessing you don’t want to talk?” Rich yelled over the music. Her only response was to turn it up even louder. Rich turned the radio off. Kate tensed, but offered no other reaction. “Kate, we can’t continue like this.”

  “You’re right,” she said to the window.

  “I’m what?”

  She turned her head only enough to glare at him then turned back to the window. “This can’t go on this way, but we have to face the facts.”

  “The fact is that I love you. That, my love, is something that will never change.” Rich expected a tender emotion in her eyes, but when she looked at him, she sported an intense one he didn’t recognize, nor did he like.

  “The fact is, Rich—” Kate whirled in her seat to face him. “—that your ex-wife would like nothing more than my head on a spit. That fact is that I have guilt flowing through my veins, eating at me.” She squeezed her eyes closed, but continued her rant. “The fact is that a piece of me really misses Jesse.” She paused, and looked at him, tears in her eyes.

  Rich tried to hide the emotions that Jesse’s name brought up in him. He hated that Kate missed him. Hearing her say so caused his hands to tightened on the steering wheel. He forced in a deep breath and reminded himself that it was ridiculous to be jealous of a dead man.

  “The fact is…that Valentine’s was the last time I felt…” She let the words drift off, blushed and dropped her eyes to where her hands rolled the hem of her blouse.

  “Passion?”

  “Yes. No!” She shook her head, color continuing to flood her cheeks. “I was going to say, it was the last time I’d felt normal. Happy.”

  Rich couldn’t help the elation he felt. Kate hadn’t been touched by another guy since he’d made love to her. The possessive male instinct kicked him in the ass, and he bit his lip to keep from grinning like a fool.

  “And the fact is, Rich,” her voice cracked, “the cherry on top of the shit sundae is that…I’m pregnant.” She was nearly shouting through her sobs, her voice a higher pitch than normal.

  Rich stared at her, watching in bewilderment as she melted into a puddle of tears right before his eyes. “Kate, are you…”

  “I’m fine,” she snapped. “I don’t want your sympathy, Rich. I’m.Fine.”

  “Okay. You’re fine.” Rich nodded, wanting to argue, but knew better than to provoke her. “Are you hungry?”

  She shook her head, only to stop and nod. “Yeah, I am.”

  “What do you feel like?”

  A sob broke the silence. Kate sniffed. “Why are you being so nice?”

  “Kate, I love you. I am not just being nice. I want to take care of you. Both of you.”

  “Please leave my son out of this.” Her tears flowed steadily down her cheeks, and she wiped at them with little hope of drying them.

  “Our son,” Rich corrected.

  “My son,” she snapped, her eyes flashed a warning. “On second thought, just take me back to the station. I’ll eat when I get home.”

  “I’d love to take you to dinner, Kate.”

  “You don’t need to bother.” She turned back toward the window, putting as much distance between them as the car would allow. “I just want to go home.”

  Rich was smart enough to know that he’d lost this particular battle with Kate. But he had no intention of losing the most important war of his life. He loved Kate, and she loved him. All he needed to do was help her remember how much.

  Kate wasn’t sure if it was her recurring nightmare or the violent kicking of her baby that had woke her. The little guy in her belly always took the times when she was stretched out to show her just how strong he was. Sometimes she felt like there was an alien growing in her belly. The way it moved and shifted all on its own was eerie—and exciting.

  She stumbled into the kitchen and tugged open the fridge. She poured some milk into a glass and slowly doused the acid that had bubbled up in the back of her throat. As if the four months of morning sickness hadn’t been bad enough, now she couldn’t sleep and was closely approaching the size of a small barn.

  Something outside caught her eye and she pulled the curtain back to get a better look. She yelped, dropped the curtain, only to pull it back—a tiny bit—and looked out again. There was a car parked in her driveway. A car she recognized. Rich.

  She should have been really pissed, but was too tired and uncomfortable to let it get to her. With her robe pulled tight around her, she padded out to the sleeping man in the car.

  “Rich,” she whispered. He made a soft snoring sound, but offered no other indication that he’d actually heard her. With her index finger, she poked him in the shoulder, but he didn’t move. “Rich,” she whispered a little louder. “I love you, Rich,” she breathed the words. It felt so good to say them. She wanted to scream them from the rooftops, but couldn’t bring herself to lead him on. There was no real future for them.

  Rich shifted in the seat, and Kate panicked that he had heard her. He mumbled something unintelligible then settled into another soft snoring pattern. His long lashes rested against his cheek, his strong jaw relaxed, and his full lips looked so kissable even in his sleeping state. She reached out to touch them only to pull her hand back. She would not allow herself to remember how they felt against her lips, against her skin.

  Her heart started to beat with the memories and she took a long breath. Her hands moved over her swollen belly, and the baby kicked as if to punctuate the importance of keeping Rich at a distance.

  Kate watched Rich for another moment before deciding that she couldn’t just allow him to sleep in her driveway. She reached her hand out and pushed his shoulder. “Rich.” He didn’t react, so she shook him again.

  He jerked awake, wiping his hand over his eyes. He blinked, stared at her as if he were seeing a ghost, and blinked again. He was
looking at her, but she wasn’t sure that he was actually seeing her.

  “Hey, sleepyhead,” she said with a smile. Oh, how she loved this man.

  “Hi,” he said sheepishly. He tried to sit up, using the seat back to help in the effort.

  Kate could see the disorientation swimming in his eyes and had to giggle at the absurdity of his efforts. It was obvious that he felt the need to protect her. It was also obvious that he was in no shape to do anything but sleep. “Would you like to tell me why you’re sleeping in my driveway?”

  “I, um…I was worried…about you.” He looked so cute half asleep.

  “Are you planning on spending every night right here?”

  He nodded as he rubbed at his neck. “Yes. At least until Shea’s caught.”

  She laughed and tugged at the handle on the car door. “Come on, Rich. I can’t have you sleeping in my driveway. Somebody might call the police, and I’m not up for filling out a bunch of paperwork.”

  He looked even more confused by her offer. His brows pulled together in question.

  “You can sleep on my couch tonight.”

  “Are you sure? I don’t want to…”

  “Shut up, Rich. I’m tired and…” She laughed softly. “Haven’t you learned that it’s not wise to argue with a pregnant woman?”

  “I’m tired, too,” he admitted, using his hand to stifle a yawn.

  Kate disappeared down the hall, and returned a few minutes later with a stack of blankets and a pillow. “It’s a pretty comfortable couch. I’ve fallen asleep on it a couple of times.”

  “Thanks,” Rich muttered as he helped Kate spread the sheet over the cushions. “You don’t have to do this.”

  “I know, but I don’t feel good about having you sleep in your car. The least I can do is give you my couch.”

  “Well, thanks. My body thanks you, too.” He ran his hand over the knot in his neck that had been aggravated by the few hours he’d slept tonight.

  She laughed lightly. “Good night, Rich.”

  “’Night.” He smiled, watching her cute, little, very pregnant body turn to disappear down the hallway. “I love you, Kate.”

  He couldn’t be sure, but he thought he heard her whisper that she loved him too. With a smile on his face, he slipped his shirt over his head and his jeans off his hips then slid beneath the blanket in only his boxers.

  Everything smelled like Kate; the sheet, the blanket, the pillow. He sighed. She smelled so good. He wanted to hold her in his arms and inhale the real thing. When he pulled into Kate’s driveway tonight, after the day he’d had with her, he never would have imagined that she’d show up and invite him in.

  He closed his eyes and concentrated on nothing, except letting his body relax, to get a good night’s sleep. Something he hadn’t been blessed with for a very long time.

  “Jesse!” Kate’s shriek brought Rich out of his sleepy haze.

  His ass hit the floor, and Rich scrambled to his feet before running to where he could hear Kate whimpering softly. “Kate?” he approached her slowly, not wanting to freak her out. “Are you okay?”

  She nodded, but Rich didn’t believe her. She was sitting up in the bed, her entire body shaking from the trauma of her nightmare. Her white cotton nightgown clung to the cold sweat that drenched her skin. Rich walked to her and sat on the edge of the bed closest to her. When she scooted closer, he opened his arms and she nearly crawled into his lap. “Will you—” She sniffed. “—hold me ’til I get back to sleep?”

  He wanted to jump up and do a little dance, but somehow managed to play it cool. “Sure. Slide over.” She didn’t hesitate, just lay down and rolled so that he could crawl in behind her. He wrapped his arms around her expanded belly suddenly nervous about the intimate contact. “Oh, is this okay?”

  Kate tucked her body closer to his. “Yes, better than okay. Thank you, Rich.”

  “My pleasure,” he sighed into her hair.

  “I’m glad you’re here,” she said softly.

  “Me too, love. Me too.” Rich listened to Kate’s breath as it slowed and steadied. He wanted nothing more than to stay right where he was, holding her in his protective embrace, but she had asked him to stay only until she was asleep. And now she was. Rich probably could have gotten away with sleeping next to her, but didn’t want to push things. Being in her house was close enough—for now.

  He pressed a light kiss to her shoulder and removed himself from Kate’s bed, Kate’s room. The couch was comfortable, just like Kate had promised, and it only took a few minutes for his body to relax into a deep sleep.

  **

  Rich didn’t know how he knew, but he knew Kate was up. She was in the kitchen, and if he hurried, he would soon be standing in the same room as she was. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and turned, placing his feet on the ground. Kate’s sweet humming floated in from the next room. A smile spread to his lips and he sauntered toward her.

  Kate was standing with her back to the door when Rich entered. He leaned against the door jamb and crossed his arms over his chest. It occurred to him in that moment that he was bare-chested, and his bottom half was as close to bare as was possible. He was just about to turn and get his pants when Kate gasped.

  “Oh,” she said softly. “I hope I didn’t wake you.” Her eyes moved slowly over his torso, then moved down until she’d consumed every inch of him to his toes.

  Rich moved his hands in front of him to cover his lower half and smiled. “No, you didn’t wake me.”

  Her eyes met his and she blushed then pulled her robe tighter around her. The satin that used to fit perfectly now gaped around her middle due to its ever increasing size. “Are you hungry?”

  “Yeah, whatcha got?”

  She shrugged and pulled a dissatisfied frown. “Not much I’m afraid. I’m not really a breakfast eater. I do have some Raisin Bran.”

  Not one of Rich’s favorites, but it was better than nothing. If it meant not hurting Kate’s feelings, Rich would have choked down a bowl of straw. “Sounds good. What time do you need to be in?”

  She glanced over her shoulder at the clock on the microwave. “I’m early today. What about you?”

  Rich really wanted to be early today, but the fact was he didn’t have work at all. Not until working with Kate had he ever cursed a day off, but that was usually the case these days. If he wasn’t at work, then she was unprotected. And Kate being unprotected was unacceptable. Completely unacceptable.

  “Rich?”

  “I’m, uh…I’m off today.”

  “Oh,” she said while fishing a spoon out of the silverware drawer. “What are you going to do today?” She leaned up on her toes and took a bowl out of the cupboard. The bowl slid onto the table with a soft scratching noise then the chair screeched as Kate pulled it away from the table. “If it’s okay, I’ll join you for breakfast.”

  “I’d like that.” He sat down and began to pour some cereal into the bowl. With a spoonful of cereal in his mouth, he chewed slowly. Kate watched him intently, her eyes focused on his every movement. “Is everything okay?” he asked, feeling like a hamster under glass.

  “Yes, I just…I didn’t think you’d be eating breakfast in my kitchen so soon after I got back.” A pathetic, humorless laugh leapt into the air between them. Her teasing jade eyes met his. “You work quick.”

  He took another bite, chewed, and swallowed. “Seems to me, Miss Callahan, that you were the one who invited me in last night.”

  She smiled, her cheeks tinting a beautiful shade of pink. “Yes, I guess you’re right.” Her teeth bit down on her bottom lip and she dropped her eyes. “Thank you, Rich.”

  “You’re welcome. But what are you thanking me for exactly?”

  Her eyes started to fill with tears, and she rubbed at them. “You really helped me last night. I have…nightmares.”

  “I figured. You know they’re just nightmares, right?”

  “I know, but they’re so real and…” She sniffed.

  �
��You have them every night?” he asked quietly, taking her hand in his.

  She nodded.

  “I’m sorry. I wish… I’m just glad I could be here for you.” An invitation to sleep with her every night would have been nice, but Rich wasn’t going to suggest that. He knew better. He’d made progress, closed the Grand Canyon sized gap between them, and there was no way he would jeopardize that.

  “Well, I guess I’d better get in the shower.”

  “Kate, you do have a protective order, right? For Shea?”

  “Do I look like an idiot, Rich? Of course I do.” Another soft scratching sound signaled Kate’s retreat from the table. “Please make yourself at home. I’ll be out in just a bit.” At the kitchen doorway, she turned and flashed him a quick smile before disappearing into the other room.

  Getting ready for work couldn’t happen quickly enough. Kate had found herself alone in her house with Rich, the one man she vowed would never set foot here. As if that wasn’t bad enough, he had actually been in her bed—with her. Kate shook her head. How could she have been so stupid?

  The way she felt about Rich was frightening enough. Giving in to those feelings terrified her. She took one more look in the mirror, smoothed her hair, pursed her lips, and took a deep breath. There was no doubt that Rich was still in the house.

  The door opened and she could hear the television. In one more step, Kate would be able to see the couch—and Rich. She paused and worked up the courage to take that final step. Except she didn’t have to. Something bumped into her. Hard.

  Air rushed from her lungs as her back met the wall. “Rich,” she gasped as his arms wrapped around her, steadying her on her feet. She was breathing heavy, but not from the near death experience. It was being in such close proximity that had her gasping for oxygen.

  He chuckled softly. “Sorry, Kate. I was just coming to check on you.” She forced her hands into fists, making them behave. What they really wanted to do was pull him close, clasp his face and kiss him, the way he deserved to be kissed. “If you don’t leave soon, you’re going to be late,” he told her.