Torkel's Chosen: A World Beyond Book 1

by Michelle Howard

  Faye managed to prop herself with the pillows behind her back. “I knew you’d come. I knew it.”

  Why did her smile still have the power to tear something from his chest? “I didn’t come for you, Faye. My unit had been hired to retrieve Lindsey Ferra. Her husbands hold prominent positions on their world.”

  She sank back on the pillows, confusion puckered her brow. “B-but, I…Torkel I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

  He leaned forward to make himself clear. “I’m saying I had no intentions of going to look for my treacherous Chosen. Getting you out of that pit was purely accidental.”

  Her sickly green pallor somehow managed to pale further. Tears welled in her eyes but Torkel pushed on. “You have a lot to answer for Faith Reid. The Enotian government does not look kindly on those that betray them. Revealing information about my top secret unit is also punishable by law.”

  “Punished? What?”

  Why did she insist on pretending? “I know about everything, Faye. How you accepted money to choose me at the presentation.”

  The idea still bit him in his weak spot. All the love he’d given her freely and it was based on lies.

  Her eyes shifted to the floor and Torkel’s heart sunk in his chest. He’d hoped she’d protest. Offer a reasonable explanation. “Why, Faye?”

  “I love you, Torkel.” She looked up and pleaded. “I really love you.”

  Her love hadn’t kept her from jeopardizing his life or his team members.

  Pain and vengeance filled him. The desire to strike back drove him to his feet. “If that’s how you love someone. I prefer you not love me.”

  She flinched and huddled on the bed. Looking at her, Torkel could only see innocence. Wounded brown eyes stared back at him. When he thought of the risk they’d all taken on this assignment, rage choked him. Nothing about her was real.

  “Torkel?”

  He couldn’t handle her feigned confusion. He’d let Maku know his patient was awake and coherent.

  ***

  Faye only half listened to what Dr. Maku told her about her injuries. He used the neutralizer on the last of her bruises. In the middle of his recitation, Faye asked, “What’s going on?”

  He looked at her with sympathy and anger. Both expressions confused her more.

  “He knows, Faye.”

  “What does he know?” Her heart raced as she asked the question in a low voice. Fearful of the answer. Fearful of what he wasn’t telling her.

  “You were paid to make him your Chosen.”

  Blood drained from her face. All for naught. She’d tried hard to avoid this.

  “You were paid to spy on the Jutak warriors,” he continued.

  “No. No.” The denial bubbled up and Faye kept repeating it. “No, no, no.”

  The doctor’s face smoothed out and became impassive. “We’re on our way back to Enotia. They take selling military secrets very serious.”

  “What are you talking about?” Her lip quivered but Faye balled her fist and pressed it to her mouth. She didn’t like any of this.

  “You face criminal charges.”

  This couldn’t be happening. She’d just spent weeks in hell fighting to survive. Fighting for Lindsey. “Lindsey? We have to find my friend.”

  Dr. Maku stepped away. “Every effort is being taken to rescue the senators’ wife, no thanks to you.”

  Senators wife? Lindsey hadn’t dropped that detail. She tried to picture the bubbly blonde at a reserved formal dinner and giggled. Maku stared as if she’d lost her mind. Maybe she had. The absurd giggles turned to sobs. Wrenching sobs that tore from her throat as she curled on her side on the bed.

  Her head ached. Her body ached. And most important, her heart ached. Footsteps and the swish of the door let her know he’d left her alone. No, she corrected herself. The hole where her heart used to be let her know she was alone.

  “Too late for tears now.”

  The gruff words sent Faye straight up in the bed. Kyele walked in and sat right on the bed next to her. He wasn’t playing with a knife but she didn’t care for the way he watched her with those eerie eyes of his.

  “Did you come to threaten me with jail too?” She bit out.

  Kyele cocked his head to the side. She felt like a bug under a microscope. “None of your actions make sense,” he finally said, voice filled with chilling puzzlement.

  “Sorry about that.” Faye closed her eyes, thinking of the hatred in Torkel’s eyes when he’d left. He was the man she loved. The man she wanted to spend her life with, yet she’d done something so horrible she couldn’t forgive herself and apparently neither could he.

  “Torkel has two choices when we land.”

  Faye ignored him.

  “If he severs the union, your actions won’t reflect negatively on him. He’d be alone and you’d be the cruel female who betrayed him.”

  Her heart clenched.

  “If he stays as your Chosen, he accepts part of the consequences of your actions and ties himself to being alone forever because you’ll receive time on a prison colony and he’d never take you back.”

  Faye opened her eyes and shifted her head on the pillow to face him. “Why are you being so cruel?”

  “Your lies were crueler to Torkel than I could ever wish to be toward you.”

  She flinched. If possible, his statement held no hint of his feelings. Why was he here? Why was he telling her this? “Why?”

  “You love Torkel.”

  A lone tear ran down her cheek. “I never made a secret of my feelings.”

  Kyele leaned forward and caught the tear on the tip of his finger as it rolled off her chin. “No, you did not,” he agreed. “This is why my initial assessment stands. Your actions make no sense.”

  “I didn’t mean to do it. Any of it,” she confessed. “I wanted a family. Someone to love me and then this guy stopped me on my way to the presentation.”

  “What guy?” he asked, features intense as he leaned forward.

  “I-I don’t know. He looked Enotian with blond hair and blue eyes but thinner and not as well built as the people I’ve seen.”

  “Why you?”

  Faye didn’t understand his question. “What do you mean?”

  “Why did he pick you out of all the women for presentation that day?”

  Faye blew out a breath. “I don’t know. Dumb luck, maybe. He said he was a friend and didn’t want Torkel to be alone. I thought…I thought I was helping. I didn’t ask for the money and refused but he offered it again and I got scared. I thought, what if things don’t work out and I needed to start over. I spent all the money I had to get in the program.”

  Faye pressed a hand to her rolling stomach.

  “When you realized Torkel was an honorable male, why did you agree to reveal our missions?”

  Her nose burned and Faye forced back the onslaught of more tears. “He threatened to tell Torkel that he paid me. He said it wasn’t a big deal. That he just needed to know when Torkel left and which teams went with him.”

  And he’d threatened Torkel. She’d only meant to protect him.

  “You’ve got to be extremely naïve.”

  Faye resented his blunt assessment despite the grain of truth in his words. “I didn’t want to lose him, Kyele. After one of the calls, I tried to stop but he warned me that he’d hurt Torkel. Teach me a lesson.”

  He looked doubtful but Faye pressed on. “When the team came back, he was hurt, Kyele. A laser burn. All because of me. You have to believe me. I didn’t want any of this to happen.”

  He stared at her, icy-green eyes probing. “I believe you because otherwise everything I witnessed between the two of you was a lie. I need to believe that decent people exist. That if Torkel could find someone to love him then so can I.”

  She hadn’t expected that. There was nothing wrong with the handsome man sitting beside her and she couldn’t imagine it would be that difficult for him to find a woman.

  Kyele got to his feet. �
�I’ll leave you to your rest now.”

  Her fingers clenched in the sheets. “Are you going to talk to Torkel? Tell him I’m sorry.”

  “Those words are best heard from your mouth.”

  He left without a backward glance.

  Chapter 23

  Faye woke when a medic arrived with her dinner or lunch. She couldn’t tell which based on the yellow broth in the bowl.

  “Dr. Maku says this will be good on your stomach since you haven’t eaten for a few days.”

  “Days?” She pondered spooning her first delicious sip.

  “Yes.” The medic checked her vitals by scrolling through the screens on the computer built into the side of the bed. “You were out of it for three days.”

  “I guess I need to thank him.” Faye knew the beatings and conditions she suffered had left her in bad shape.

  The medic finished and looked up. “Torkel as well. Your Chosen never left your side.” A smile graced her face. “I hope to find someone that loves me like that.”

  Faye flinched but the tech was already leaving. Torkel had stayed by her side knowing what she’d done. Unable to eat more, she set the half filled soup bowl on the side. Her heart hurt and fear chipped at her confidence. She didn’t want to go to jail or the alien version of prison. Her time with the Marenians made sure of that.

  The door to her room opened again. Faye’s gaze lifted. She expected to see the doctor or someone else. Jaron glared back at her and closed the door behind him.

  “Kyele said you were finally up.”

  She’d never seen him this angry. There was no sign of the light-hearted man she’d become attached to. Faye pushed up in the bed. “I’m glad you stopped in. I wanted to thank you and Team One for rescuing me.”

  Jaron rolled his eyes and sneered. “We didn’t go to save you and I promise if we’d known we would have left you there.”

  Faye jerked from the cold words as remorse filled her. “I’m sorry about what I did, Jaron.”

  “Are you?” He stormed across the room and stood over her, breath coming out in short spurts. “We risk our life each time we go out. We try to protect people caught in the slavery Marenians would push on them. But…” He fairly frothed at the mouth. “You worked with them against us.”

  He braced his arms on the bed, staring into her eyes. Hurt glimmered beneath the anger. “We trusted you. Torkel trusted you.”

  Nothing she said would absolve her guilt in his eyes. “I know. I’m sorry.”

  “That’s it!” He blew up and stepped away. “You’re sorry.”

  “What else do you want?” Faye snapped, tired of taking this from all of them. “Yes, it was wrong. I can’t apologize enough and I suffered for my mistake. I suffered Jaron!”

  “Maybe not enough.”

  His answer doused Faye in cold water.

  Jaron’s mouth curled, pleased he’d hit where it counted.

  After he left, Faye slept on and off. She ate when told and answered Dr. Maku’s questions each time he stopped by. The rapport they’d developed was noticeably absent in their conversations. She was the resident pariah because none of Torkel’s men came back. In fact, everyone avoided her until Torkel came in the morning to tell her they’d be landing soon.

  “We’ve reached Enotia. Someone will be in to help get you ready.”

  “I’m sorry for everything, Torkel.” Kyele was right. The apology needed to come from her own mouth.

  He turned his back on her and she could see the deep breaths he took to calm himself before he spun to face her. “You’ve put me in a hard position, Faye.”

  Fear slivered down her spine. “What are you going to do?”

  He shook his head. “We’ll talk after. After we take you into custody.”

  Faye paled and pushed her legs to the side of the bed and stood. “Torkel, you can’t.”

  He ignored her protest and tipped his head toward the ceiling on a sigh. “You committed a crime, Faye. You violated the law I stand for.”

  “Please.” She begged and took a step to him. Her unsteady legs and weakened condition caused her to sway. “Torkel.”

  She managed a step in his direction before dropping.

  He cursed and caught her when she would have fallen. Faye wrapped her arms around him and pressed her nose into his neck. She inhaled his familiar scent and absorbed the warmth and comfort of being held by him after her time with the Marenians.

  Torkel lowered her back on to the bed. “No,” she cried out when he would have pulled away. “Don’t leave me, Torkel. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. So sorry,” she blubbered.

  He reached up and eased her arms from around him. “I’m sorry too. Sorry that you chose to deceive me instead of trusting me to help you.”

  And just like that, the thick blade of his voice cut through her. Pain burst from deep in her chest. She inhaled sharply. Tried to steady her rising grief. The ache in her chest spread. Tears burned and more moisture beaded from beneath her lids.

  Torkel put more distance between them. The thought of what her life would look like without him spanned before her. He would never forgive her. The truth hit her at last. She’d broken both of their hearts even if by accident. The heartache and knowledge rendered her motionless.

  Faye leaned back in the bed. “I understand.”

  And she did. With her betrayal, she’d destroyed the core of what they’d shared and managed to build. The cold of the Marenian cell came back. Inch by inch Faye allowed it to take the place of the love that had kept hope alive during that time. Piece by piece Faye locked her love away deep inside. So far down it couldn’t hurt her any more.

  She forced a brave smile to her face. The edges trembled but she held onto it with grim determination. “Whether you meant to or not, I thank you and the team for saving my life.”

  His brown eyes darkened as he studied her. Tried to read beyond the words she spoke but Faye maintained the façade of calm acceptance while inside the maelstrom of emotions ground to a halt.

  Then like Kyele, he left her without looking back.

  Faye grabbed the tray with her meal and threw it on the floor. She screamed out in agony, nails clawing at the bedding. But this time, no one came in to check on her.

  ***

  Torkel left Faye’s room with swift angry strides. Why couldn’t he get passed the hurt and innocence in her eyes? Her betrayal stung but his emotions were beyond that. A part of him fought to forgive her. The part that still desperately loved the shaken female on the narrow bed. The other part of him raged like a wounded animal. Disappointment and hurt clashed without an outlet. His Marenian genetics wanted vengeance. He mentally howled with the pain of it.

  He’d trusted Faye. Given her his heart and exposed himself as never before. The only people close enough to hurt him were his parents and sister but Faye had slipped under his guard seamlessly. Pledged her love without guile. Or so he thought. What she’d done to aid the Marenians burned him and still he’d almost broken when she clung to him and cried.

  He was almost to the end of the hall when he heard the loud crash from her room. Torkel froze as her cries reached his ears. Cries that splintered the remains of his heart. Jagged pieces tore free and his eyes burned as he forced himself to keep walking. To leave her alone to her pain and suffering. He refused to shed any tears over Faye. She’d shattered his illusions about love.

  Chapter 24

  Torkel waited with the members of Team One as a cuffed Faye was lead from the medic center. Maku walked at her side, a guiding hand on her elbow. Torkel steeled his heart against the sight of his Chosen in the tan, one-piece jumper worn by criminals. The top bagged on her slight frame and the rolled legs tripped her slippered feet every few steps.

  The group walked in silence to the shuttle that took them to Enotia’s surface. Somber gazes followed as the crew from the cruiser eyed Faye and the Jutaks. When they landed, a vehicle waited for them to use on the drive.

  Torkel forced himself to remain standing at
the door of the hover craft until she slid in the back seat. He sat across from her with Gregir and Geile climbing in on each side of Faye. Arak drove with Jaron in the front. Kyele and Rydak had already left to return and update the teams on their status and estimated arrival.

  Torkel violated protocol by taking Faye home first. He needed to report her presence on the planet and confess the discovery of her actions in plotting with the Marenians against Jutak justice. He should have reported it the moment Jaron shared his discovery but he hadn’t.

  He glanced her way, his gaze once more drawn to her. She chewed her bottom lip nervously and kept her head turned to face the window and the blurred scenery as they sped through the streets.

  Torkel wanted to break through the shell she’d erected around herself since their fight. Instead, he kept his eyes on her and wondered why it was so hard to stop loving her after what she’d done.

  They pulled up in front of their building and the team exited quickly. Torkel grasped Faye’s elbow to help her out but she flinched and pulled away from his touch. The move angered him. She’d done it several times during the transport and he’d initially ignored it.

  “You can’t guilt me, Faye.”

  She turned empty eyes in his direction. “I know, Torkel.”

  He hated the defeat she aimed at him.

  Geile reached for her arm gently. “I have her, Torkel. I’ll get her settled.”

  Settled. A polite euphemism. Geile would take her to a detainment cell. Better than the cell the Marenians kept her but a cell nonetheless.

  Faye didn’t speak. She lowered her head and went with Geile.

  ***

  He hated seeing her there. Torkel watched the cameras with Jaron. Faye sat cross legged on the bed, staring at the walls, neglecting the tray Kyele had delivered. It surprised Torkel that of all his men, Kyele was the one to take the food to her. Anger and resentment ran like a deep current through all of them but as always, Kyele’s actions were the opposite of what everyone expected.