Of Mobsters and Men: WILD (Book #2)

by L. A TehPeaceMaker

  "You were screaming in your sleep, then started punching and kicking me." He explained. By his tone alone, I knew that he had an idea of what I was dreaming. I wiped my tears and then stroked my thumb over the areas I hit Stefano. "Stefano-"

  "I know."

  Stefano pulled me closer to him and wrapped his arms around me. We stayed like this for ten minutes, Stefano whispering comforting words to me.

  "I'm gonna’ make you some breakfast, since you're already up." He teased. I could tell by the tightness around his eyes he was sleepy. "No it's fine, you don't-" I started but he just waved his hand.

  "It's alright, just get comfortable." Stefano said, taking the TV remote off his stand and turning the flat-screen on. He gave me a reassuring look before walking to the door.

  It wasn't long after Stefano left our room when I felt bile rise into my mouth. Quickly, I jumped up from bed and ran to the bathroom. I lifted the toilet seat and got on my knees, emptying the contents in my mouth.

  Just as I finished, I began to feel dizzy. I thought of how it would be a good idea to get some medication to fall asleep these days.

  These restless nights are really taking their toll on me.

  Chapter 30

  Raelyn's POV

  I looked at the fresh new set of nails on my fingers. They were all white, not too long with a square cut. My eyes focused on the little sparkles of gold glitter designing them. I was out this afternoon with the girls and we just stopped somewhere to eat lunch.

  Even throughout our mani-pedi's, my mind went back to reflect on what happened this morning. It wouldn't have been the first time I woke up screaming from a flashback I had in my dream, but I vomited for no apparent reason.

  I had symptoms of a cold right after and Stefano even suggested I was getting sick.

  "You've been very quiet Rae, what's wrong?" Gigi asked me. I blinked repeatedly and shifted my eyes between Gigi and Caterina.

  I gave them both a reassuring smile and shook my head. "Nothing, I'm just savoring the moment with my girls." I said, partially lying. I lied a lot these days about my true feelings.

  Caterina chuckled and poked Gigi. "Oh, leave her alone, Gigi." Caterina said.

  We laughed and Gigi shrugged her shoulders.

  "Anyway, when are you going to tell us about your new boo? Me and Rae suspect you're hiding something or someone from us." Gigi said, changing the subject before giving me a quick side-eye.

  Caterina's eyebrows raised in surprise after being called out. She then put her hands in-front of her for defense. "Okay, okay fine. I met this guy named Diego while I was in Murcia, Spain. The first time I heard him speak, I fell in love! I'll stop there." She said and giggled.

  Gigi wiggled her eyebrows and I couldn't help but grin at Caterina's confession. "Oooh..." I teased her.

  "Can he speak English?" Gigi asked her. Caterina threw her head back as she laughed.

  "No and I like it that way!" She answered without a care in the world. We all laughed in response and her and Gigi high-fives.

  "Are you serious about him?" I asked, sitting up as the conversation became more interesting.

  "I'm just going with the flow. We Skype every morning, though. I think he's obsessed with me, now that I think about it." Caterina said, making a thinking face.

  "You gotta’ be careful Cat, he might be crazy." Gigi said in a slight warning but playful tone.

  You will be mine, Rae.

  I began to hear Vincent's voice in my head. A cold shiver crawled down my spine. I remember running from him, shooting him, my hands trembling after I watched him drop dead.

  "Rae?" Caterina asked. Gigi and her both watched me with concern in their eyes.

  "I'll be back." I said quickly, getting up and taking my purse with me to the restroom. I hoped they didn't catch the wavering in my voice.

  I just needed space to recollect my thoughts from what just flashed in my mind. Opening the door to the empty restroom and open stalls, I sighed in relief. I gripped the counter of the sink at the far right and looked at myself in the mirror.

  I've been more emotional lately and I could feel it.

  "Non sto bene, I'm not alright." I blurted, lowering my head as my eyes started watering. A sudden twinge of nausea hit me and I stood there for what seemed like three minutes before I felt stable again.

  I recognized these symptoms and I was beginning to doubt I had a cold. It was now afternoon and I wasn't experiencing any cold symptoms. I bit my lip at the thought I might be pregnant.

  I haven't been on my pills for a long time. Since my abduction I've been too forgetful these days to even remember to swallow a pill. If I am pregnant, that could change things. In fact, deep down inside now that I think about it, I know there could be a possibility of me not being pregnant for Stefano.

  That was the scariest part. I didn't even want to think of things going in that route.

  I didn't even know if Vincent ejaculated in me after the rape. Still I doubted it because if he did, I would have had pregnancy symptoms sooner. Besides, I only started having sex again with Stefano a little over last month and now I'm getting symptoms.

  Then, there's also that possibility I could be wrong. If I am pregnant with Vincent's baby, this would destroy Stefano and I.

  Regardless, I needed to see a specialist. I couldn't go to Ardizonne either because news of my visit would obviously get back to my husband.

  I gathered myself and reapplied my lipstick since it was fading. When I stepped out, I saw Caterina and Gigi waiting in the hall.

  I raised my eyebrows, surprised to see them out here.

  "Are you okay?"

  "You've been gone for too long."

  "Really? I didn't think so." I responded, playfully. Gigi gave me an unimpressed eyebrow and I pretended I didn't see it.

  ***

  It was now evening and Gigi and I were at her house. Caterina left us early to run some errands but we all knew that was a lie. Diego had popped up on her phone screen and she was gone in a flash.

  Even though our girl's day was cut short, I took advantage of that because I wasn't too distracted now to think about what's been troubling me.

  "My mom is gonna’ bring Marcelo home tonight. It's been awhile since she's gotten to pinch his little cheeks." Gigi said and chuckled. I sent her a warm smile, showing I was engaged in her start-up conversation.

  I then remembered that Romano was actually still at work with Stefano at this moment. That's the thing...will our next baby be a made-man too if it's a boy? If the baby is a girl, would she feel safe?

  "Do you still have some of that pie?" I asked Gigi as she was about to close the fridge. I tapped my fingers on the dining table.

  On the chance Stefano and I have a baby, there were many things I had to think about. Could I really bring another child into this society? This society that has scarred me?

  "When are you gonna’ stop pretending like everything is alright?" Gigi asked, bringing the plate of sliced pie to me and putting it down on the table

  "I told you, Gigi-" I started.

  "Oh, spare me, Rae! You really think you can lie to me? It's understandable if Caterina falls for your tricks but I know you." She snapped.

  Her hands were placed on her hips and her eyes were furrowed at me. I knew that look. Gigi was about to give me a piece of her mind.

  "You're right, I'm not fine." I admitted, trying to de-escalate the tense atmosphere.

  Gigi drew back and raised both her eyebrows. "What's wrong?" She asked in a softer tone.

  "I might be pregnant."

  "I'd say congratulations but not only is that not certain, you don't look happy either."

  I closed my eyes and shook my head. "Maybe I'm just paranoid, but I have a gut feeling I'm pregnant."

  "I see. This isn't the most convenient time for you to be pregnant either." Gigi said, reading my mind.

  "It's not just that." I added.

  "Let me see if I can find a test." Gigi said, turning to j
og upstairs. I sighed and rested my face in the palms of my hands.

  Having another child with Stefano meant another child to worry about. There would be another child added to this dangerous society. I wanted to cry just thinking of the situation that happened to me, ever happening to any of my loved ones.

  I wouldn't want what happened to me to happen to anyone. Being born into this family would make it a possibility.

  Although I love Stefano, I don't love what he does, and that's never changed.

  Gigi came back with two boxes of pregnancy tests. "Here, girl."

  *

  I held one test in my left hand and the other in my right hand. Both had two lines drawn in the center, displaying what I thought was going on.

  Gigi knocked on the door three times.

  "How do you feel? What does it say?" She asked me.

  I stepped out of the bathroom with the two tests and handed them to her to read. Her eyes widened in shock.

  "I'm happy I could have another child, but just not in this climate." I told her. In the midst of what's going on with my recovery as well as the ultimatum I gave Stefano some time ago, this pregnancy was just inconvenient.

  I felt my eyes watering and I covered my face to trap the tears. "Oh, Rae." Gigi stepped forward and brought me in closer to her. I had let it all out and even started sobbing. "I have so many thoughts jumbled up in my head. I'm beginning to question things, question where I want to go from here. I just don't want to disappoint anyone."

  "What are you saying, Raelyn? You won't disappoint anyone."

  "Oh my God." I choked up a sob. "I should be happy now right? That I survived my abduction and I'm back home with friends and family... I should be happy with the life I'm living but I'm not. I'm severely tormented and I’m so scared! I'm so confused!" I said, pulling away.

  "Rae..."

  "I feel like I have to fake everything, just to make everyone around me content and happy. I can't even enjoy sex like I used to! I’m not in the right state of mind to process my own sensations. I don't want to have to have to watch my back, hiding from people wanting to get me. I just don't feel safe! I've even killed someone!" I exclaimed.

  Gigi's eyes softened. "I don't ever want to go through what I did again. Neither, do I want my children's futures to be painted with blood!" I began to ramble but I didn't care. This is how I felt.

  Gigi took my hand and held it in hers, trying to comfort me. "I understand, Raelyn. Your reasons make sense. Just talk to him."

  "We all love you. Stefano loves you and I know he wants to see you happy. Come on Rae, you can't keep all of this inside forever. I'm sure you two can work something out." She encourages me.

  I shut my eyes tight.

  "This isn't a regular clash of philosophies though." I added.

  "I know that."

  Depending on who's responsible for this pregnancy, a lot more was at stake.

  All I needed to know was how far along I was.

  "Gigi, please come with me to the hospital tomorrow." I asked her.

  ***

  The next evening

  "I went through the homeschooled route but I want Romano to be enrolled in private school instead. Not only does it give him a leg up academically, but he'll gain more social skills." Stefano said, wiping his mouth with the napkin and raising an eyebrow as he tilted his head to the side.

  I watched Romano copy his father's movements exactly. At least he learned to wipe his mouth well.

  "That's what Gigi and I were discussing today. She said the same thing. If Romano and Marcelo enroll in the same school that could also be beneficial."

  "Hey, stop talkin' about me." Romano huffed, crossing his arms. I chuckled and Stefano gave him a playful glare, making Romano laugh.

  Stefano washed the dishes and I wiped the kitchen counters after dinner. Romano kicked his feet in the air while flipping through his superhero comics in the living room.

  As Stefano wiped his hands clean and grabbed an apple to start peeling it with a knife, I remembered I needed to talk with him.

  "I have something to tell you, Stefano." I said as confidently as I could.

  Stefano knitted his eyebrows in concern. "Can it wait for us to go upstairs?" He asked.

  "Actually, I rather tell you right now." I said starting to peel one side of the red apple.

  Stefano walked closer to me, letting me know I had his attention. "Okay, what's going on?"

  "Truth is, I'm not happy. I haven't been for months now. I've putting on an act like everything is alright when it's far from the truth." I admitted. I felt like a huge boulder was lifted off of me. I looked to see Stefano taken back with what seemed like shock.

  "Why?" He asked in a soft and confused tone.

  "I've just been pretending all along to appease Not only everyone, but your conscience since I know that you blame yourself for everything that happened."

  Stefano didn't say anything. In fact, his eyes were locked on my form as I took my eyes from his and began slicing the peeled fruit.

  "When we came back home, I just wanted things to go back to how things were." I said again. I didn't want to break his heart or be a burden.

  "I thought that if pretended, everything would be fine. I also thought I'd be able to convince myself this is the life that I want."

  I wasn't looking at Stefano, but I could tell everything I was saying was news to him. He thought everything was going fine and then I drop the bomb on him.

  "Raelyn, I'm trying to understand but I don't." He replied. His voice was deep and low. "It sounds like you're having second thoughts on our marriage after all." He added.

  "Stefano, it's not that-"

  "I can't believe you feel this way. We're supposed to stick together, be a family." He interrupted me. I stopped cutting the apple and put down the knife on the chopping board.

  "Don't let him get in between us, Rae. That's exactly what he wanted." Stefano added and I shook my head.

  "Stefano, it's not about him this time." I said, my eyes beginning to water. I took a bowl and put the sliced apples in them.

  Even though I wanted to please Stefano the most, I was also upset that out of everyone, he failed to see under my disguise.

  "Shit." Stefano cursed, rubbing his fingers through his hair. "Your father has gotten to you then? I know he wants-"

  "No, no, no! Stefano you just don't get it!" I said, throwing knife into the sink.

  Stefano looked at me with eyes that held disbelief and somewhat fear.

  "Mama?" I heard Romano's tiny voice approaching us. I sighed and Stefano turned his head to glare at Romano. "Romano, leave us to talk." He said, firmly.

  Romano pouted and turned to walk away with concern plastered all over his face.

  "This is just what I've been thinking." I said, honestly. I looked up into Stefano's eyes soften. I bit my lip.

  "Why didn't you tell me?"

  "I already told you why."

  Stefano closed his eyes as he leaned on the counter with his hands. "Rae, I've been here every step of the way for you. I put my life on the line to rescue you. You know how much I adore you-"

  I shook my head quickly. "It's not just about love, Stefano. I love you too, but I don’t know how much longer I can last in an environment like this. My feelings have not changed." I spoke firmly, placing both my hands on the counter.

  We both stood silent, Stefano looking at me with eyes that were in denial. "I'll call Dr.Ardizonne." He said all of a sudden. I clenched my jaw and gave him a sharp look.

  "Dr.Ardizonne helps me with my trauma. There's nothing he can do for me outside of that.What I'm telling you has everything to do with how I've always felt about this lifestyle. "

  "Mama Mia..." Stefano sighed, covering the side of his face and turning around to walk out the kitchen. "Don't walk away from me, listen! I told you this so you could understand, not get mad." I said, following him into the living room.

  I saw that Romano was no longer down here.


  "I'm not mad I just, I need to think. I need to think. Merda, shit."

  This didn't go like I'd hoped it would. Stefano was completely on the defensive and it felt like the first time he wasn't really hearing me. I lost my appetite, not even wanting to eat the sliced fruit in-front of me. I put the bowl in the fridge and shook my head slowly as I walked to the living room.

  I fell back on a couch and closed my eyes, reflecting on what just happened. With the way our conversation was going, I couldn't even tell him the news.

  **

  In the middle of the night, I felt another presence around me. I opened my eyes and looked up to see someone standing above me. Being startled, I gasped and moved away quickly.

  "It's just me." The familiar deep voice whispered. I rubbed my eyes and saw Stefano clearly, his eyebrows knitted as he leaned over me. I sighed and Stefano slid his arms under me, lifting me up and carrying me bridal style.

  I closed my eyes and let him carry me to our bedroom. He laid me on the bed and when I opened my eyes again, I could see that his side was neat. He hadn't slept since he came up here.

  Stefano descended his head and placed a kiss on my lips. I kissed him back and he pecked my lips a couple more times.

  Stefano pulled away and bit his lip before breaking the silence. "I'm sorry for how I acted. It was just the heat of the moment and the only thing that I could understand was that you wanted to leave me." He admitted.

  I sat up and averted my eyes to anywhere but him.

  "I'm actually more disappointed in myself for not seeing under your disguise. I guess I wanted to believe that you were alright. I wasn't truly by your side this whole time." He said, his voice getting more sincere as he spoke.

  "Stefano..." I said, my eyes going back to him.

  "I thought a lot about what you said and I'm willing to make some drastic measures for you to change your mind." He said again. I raised my eyebrows up, curious to where he was going with this.

  I knitted my eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

  "It isn't going to be easy, but I want to make my family business legitimate." Stefano answered, a smirk appearing on his handsome features.

  A legitimate business? That sounded good, but I know his family has enemies. "Stefano, that's not going to change-"