by Anna Edwards
“Yes,”
“And she was really sick?”
“Yes, she had cancer. I don’t think anyone expected her to live. What’s happened is a miracle.” There’s a relief in Juniper’s voice which tells me she didn’t really expect her mother to survive.
“It is. I wish I could remember more of what I did.”
“Does the book not tell you?”
“It might…I don’t know. It’s confusing.”
“And you want me to help you understand it because I’m good at that sort of thing?” There’s an element of frustration now in her tone.
Juniper hates me for what I’ve become: a nasty bully, scared witless by what happens to him when he kisses the girl who holds his heart. For a moment, it crosses my mind to lie to her, to tell her she’s a complete nerd, and that’s why I want her help, but I can’t do it. Something about me needs to change.
“No, not quite. There’s a reason, but it’s not because you’re a nerd-”
“I’m going to hang up,” Juniper interrupts me.
“I’m sorry,” I blurt out.
Juniper falls silent. It's the first time in a long time she’s heard those words come out of my mouth.
“I need your help because somehow you’re linked to this. I’ve become this Guardian creature only a few times in my life, and each time, it’s been right after I’ve kissed you. That’s not the way it’s supposed to happen. It’s controllable according to the books, and it shouldn’t have a trigger, but for some reason mine does.”
The other end of the line goes silent before I hear the dial tone. Juniper has hung up on me. I don’t know how she feels about what I just said to her. Was I wrong to tell the truth? Will she put the dates together with me kissing her the other day and her mother being cured?
I place my phone back down on the nightstand and turn off the bedside light. There’s nothing more I can do except finish translating the book and hope I haven’t ruined any chance I have of persuading Juniper to help me.
“I’ve become this guardian creature a few times in my life, and each time, it’s been right after I’ve kissed you.”
His words play over and over in my head. I couldn’t get back to sleep last night… well, this morning I guess.
I saw my mum this weekend, but she had no more information to offer me in regards to the Guardian. Last night, before she headed back home, I asked her if I should remove her memory of Jacobi being her Guardian, and she said yes. She said it was too dangerous for her to have that information in her head. She loves my dad and she trusts him, but after sleeping on it, I think she realised this knowledge could be harmful to both Jacobi and me. She didn’t want to take the chance, so I scrubbed her recollection of it all.
I’ve never come across anyone else who has the power to erase memories. I know there are others who can, but I’ve never met them. It’s a rare gift, and knowing my mum is better now and there’s a strong chance my dad will worm his way back into her life, I also removed the knowledge of what I can do from her mind.
But, I feel guilty for doing so because even though it could be essential for my survival, she’s still my mum, even if it isn’t by blood.
Groaning at my own thoughts, I look over at the clock. It’s just after six am and I need to show up for my last day of cleaning punishment.
Lucas texted me the other day and asked me if I wanted to join him for a picnic. It was sweet, but still, I turned him down. There’s too much history between me and his best friend, and on top of that, the way he acted when Jacobi and I were with him show’s he’s putting himself in a precarious position with his friend. I’m not Yoko, and I don’t want to be. The few clean-up sessions we’ve had together since I turned him down have been awkward, and I know I’m making it that way. I need to rectify that. It’s unlikely I’ll spend any more time with Lucas after our cleaning officially finishes today, and I don’t want him thinking I have a stick up my arse.
Nodding at my own thoughts, I jump out of bed with a little more pep than someone who’s been awake since three am should have, and I head to the shower.
“Hi,” I murmur when I arrive to see Lucas is already there.
“Hey,” he replies, rubbing the back of his neck.
Well this is awkward.
“Look, I don’t want things to be strange between us. Friends?” I offer, holding my hand out like an idiot.
With a shake of his head and a grin, he grabs my hand in his. “I do really want to be your friend. I’m cool with this only being a friendship,” he tells me.
I smile back as he drags me in for a hug while still shaking my hand. I feel it now, feel him, it really is a friendship. There’s a settled feeling between us, and I breathe out a sigh of relief.
“What the fuck,” is growled from behind us, and we both break apart like we’ve done something wrong, and I’m immediately irritated with myself for reacting that way.
Jacobi stands staring at the both of us. A feral look on his face. The stubble along his jaw evidences that what he told me in our middle-of-the-night call was true. It’s also hella hot, and I chastise myself silently for having that reaction to him.
“Cobi, we’re friends. You have to get over it,” Lucas tells him with a cocky smile.
Jacobi moves so quickly that I gasp with shock. He pins Lucas against the wall, breathing heavily. “She’s…” he barks then looks over at me.
Shaking his head a dark emotion filters through his eyes, and I want to go to him, to hold him, to make it better. I take a quick step backwards scared of my own thoughts. My movement causes something else to move through his eyes. He believes I’m scared of him, and it’s not what he wants. This whole time he’s been trying to intimidate me, and now he thinks he has, it’s upset him.
“She’s what?” Lucas challenges, but he doesn’t try to push Jacobi away.
Jacobi turns his hard stare back to Lucas. “Nothing… she’s nothing,” he growls, releasing his friend and stalking away.
Lucas pulls his blue t-shirt down, reshaping it while grinning at me.
“What?” I ask, confused by his expression.
“My boy likes you. That,” he says pointing to where Jacobi went, “proved what I already thought.”
I bite down on my bottom lip and stare at the ground for a few seconds.
“Come on, let’s get this last day over with,” I sigh, looking up at Lucas, who’s still wearing a grin.
“So, do you want to tell me what you’ve found out? How I actually fit into all this? Or would you rather start by explaining what the hell that was this morning with Lucas?” I question Jacobi when I see him just before lunch.
Jacobi opens his locker, throws his books in, and slams it shut before looking down at me. He looks like he’s about to say something when two hands slide around his middle from behind, and Taya peeks around the side of him.
“Is she bothering you?” she asks, looking up at him like he hangs the moon.
I frown when I notice he’s looking at her with annoyance, but she doesn’t realise. Her eyes are on me now. “Run along, pigbitch,” she orders waving her hand at me.
Jacobi opens his mouth to say God knows what, but I get there before him, “Pigbitch? Branching out are we, Taya?”
Her eyes narrow on me, and I see the fire ignite in them. Her magic is appearing, and I realise something in that second.
“You’re threatened by me.” The words spill out of my mouth before I can stop them, the realisation has me almost laughing at the absurdity of it all.
“I am in no way threatened by you and your ugly face. Whore,” she adds for good measure.
Jacobi shakes her off. “Go away, Taya.”
“What the hell!” she replies, stomping her foot down.
I snort, roll my eyes, and walk away. I do not want to be anywhere near those two when they’re going at it.
The day gets easier as I don’t see the two of them again. Emmie and I have a class together, and even though I tell her
about my run in with Taya, I don’t mention anything about Jacobi’s secret. It’s his to tell. I may be many things, but a gossip isn’t one of them.
Sitting on my balcony and enjoying the April sunshine, a rarity in London, I notice Jacobi crossing the road and heading towards my building. When I hear his knock, I click my fingers and unlock the front door.
“I could have been anyone,” he complains, walking out to meet me on the balcony.
“I saw you coming,” I say, pointing down to the road.
“I know. Still, a neighbour could have got here before me. Just…be careful, okay?”
“Aww, worried about me? Shouldn’t you be more concerned about your girlfriend?” I reply, pushing my sunglasses up onto my head and staring into his deep blue eyes. They seem never-ending. I’m pretty sure you could get lost in them.
Grinding my teeth, I try to erase his beautiful eyes from my mind, but it’s futile. I’ve never been able to forget about Jacobi Ashdown.
“Not my girlfriend.”
My head jerks back, surprise no doubt shining in my eyes. “Since when?”
“Since today, and no, I don’t want to talk about it. Believe it or not, my relationship status isn’t why I’m here,” he snaps.
I hold my hands up, “Okay, sunshine, let’s go inside.” He nods and follows me indoors. I grab two cans of Coke from my fridge and hold them up. “I have Bud if you’d prefer?” I offer, but he shakes his head.
Most alcoholic drinks don’t affect us. It must be something to do with the magic we hold in our veins. The only alcohol that does is Tequila, no one knows why. If we want to get buzzed or forget, we’ll turn to Tequila, but otherwise, most of us choose not to drink alcohol at all. I keep Bud in my fridge, but I’ve no idea why other than it makes me feel a little more human, and a little less witch. I don’t know why that feeling is important to me, it just is.
“I’ve finished translating the book,” he tells me, popping open the Coke as I sit next to him on the sofa.
He’s so close I have to try hard to focus on him and not on his leg, which is touching mine, or his smell. His cologne is subtle and fresh, and mixed with his natural woodsy scent, it’s heady. I close my eyes involuntarily.
“Are you okay?” he questions, and my eyes pop open.
I cough. “Yeah, sorry, just tired. Someone woke me up early,” I complain, pursing my lips.
“Sorry,” he apologises, his shoulders dropping.
Shit! That’s the second time in twenty-four hours that Jacobi Ashdown has apologised to me.
“So, what answers did the book give you?”
He pinches the bridge of his nose, and for the first time in a long time, I feel sorry for him. “It threw up more questions than it gave answers,” he sighs.
“I’m sorry, Jacobi,”
“Cobi.”
“Huh?”
“You used to call me Cobi,” he says, turning and looking down into my eyes.
“That was a long time ago.”
“It feels like yesterday, Juni,” he responds, and the soft way he says my name makes my insides clench with the memories of the past, the happiness and the sadness. I can’t deal with it right now.
“So, tell me what you did find out,” I order.
He sighs and nods his head, turning back to his phone.
“I translated everything into a document, but basically, I guess, if this is all real and the book explains what I really am,” his gaze moves to me for a moment before looking back at the phone, “I can either save people or take their lives.”
My eyes widen. “Oh.”
“Please don’t be scared of me,” he whispers, facing me again.
“I’m not scared of you,” I whisper back and slowly we both lean forward, like an invisible force is drawing us toward each other. Just before our lips touch, though, he jolts backwards into the corner of the sofa, his chest heaving.
“Shit!” he says wiping his hand over his face. “I..I.”
I stop him talking. I know he’s upset with himself. “Jacobi,” I automatically use his full name and watch as his jaw locks, “you’re obviously drawn to me. Whatever this is,” I say motioning between the two of us. “But, you don’t really feel it.” I sigh and offer him a sad smile. “You told me the other day I’m somehow a part of this because it only happens when we kiss.” My voice breaks on the last word as I realise the truth in what I’m saying. I have feelings for Jacobi, I always have, but his feelings before…and now, they aren’t real…they never were. “It stands to reason, whatever controls this transformation in you has engineered it so you feel compelled to kiss me; otherwise, you’d never transform. You don’t want to kiss me…” My voice breaks again. “You’re hardwired to kiss me. It’s not your fault. I’m not angry, but it’s probably best if we stay away from each other, at least until you’ve figured this out.”
He says nothing. He’s staring at me, his jaw still locked, but I can see it in his eyes, he agrees, and I feel like I can’t breathe. I need to get out of here.
“Email me the translated book, and I’ll have a look at it if you want me to, but I have to head out now, so please lock the doors behind you,” I tell him without giving him the chance to answer me, and grabbing my bag, I rush out of my own home, letting the tears fall silently.
I’m in school, but I’m not really here. Life is happening around me, but I’ve spent most of the day sitting in the same seat, staring at my mobile and the email account on it. I swipe it up and down every few minutes, hoping for a reply from Juniper about the translated book I sent her last night, but I’ve heard nothing.
Why is she the key? If I could understand that, then maybe I could control what’s happening to me. I’m never going to find out, though. She says she’s going to help me, but I bet she’s not even read what I sent her. That damn woman is so frustrating. I swear she’s been sent here solely to cause me as much trouble as possible. Damn it, I can’t go on like this. I’m the king of Caspian and in severe danger of losing my position. I need to re-establish my authority. I say what happens here, no one else, not even some little girl with plump, kissable lips.
Don’t think about her lips.
I’m screwed.
Peeling myself away from my chair, I make my way out into the hallway of the practical arts block of Caspian Academy. Lower school children run around, making their way between lessons, and I walk straight down the middle of the corridor, forcing them to move to the side before scurrying on. One of them doesn’t move quickly enough, though, and knocks my bag off my back. His eyes go wide when he realises what he’s done, and he rushes to pick it up and hand it to me, multiple apologies falling from his lips. I snatch it from him and fling it over my shoulder before stomping off without giving any acknowledgement to the boy.
I make my way to the common room for the seniors. At this time of the day, most of my contemporaries will be in there chatting away before heading off to prepare for dinner. I sometimes eat with them, only sometimes. It depends on my mood. Today I will. I’ll sit at the head of the senior table in the position of king. It’s a shame I’ll have Taya at my side. She’ll no doubt be complaining all the time about me ending our relationship, but I don’t have time for her, and if I’m being honest with myself, she’s boring and in no way a match for me magically. There’s only one person in this school who’s anywhere near my standard, Juniper. And right now, I hope she’s reading the translated book I sent her and is figuring out why she’s the key to my Guardian side.
My hopes are dashed when I walk into the common room and see her and Emmie deep in conversation. I want to rage and scream while they’re laughing and giggling together, probably about me and my predicament. She couldn’t care less about me. I take a step forwards to confront her, but I’m not quick enough. Taya and her cronies appear from out of nowhere and make a beeline for Juniper first.
“Get up, Flake.” Taya stands with her hands on her hips, and her head held high.
Juniper look
s up at my now ex-girlfriend but doesn’t move.
“Go away, Taya. Emmie and I are busy.” Juniper looks back down and re-engages with her best friend.
“Don’t you ignore me, bitch. I said get up.” Taya steps forward and shoves Juniper on the shoulder.
This time Juniper gets to her feet.
“I don’t know what your problem is, Taya, but I’m not a part of it so leave me alone,”
I lean back against the wall behind me and watch events unfold. I cross my feet at the ankles and relax. I’m still angry with Juniper for treating my predicament like it’s not urgent, but I’m also enjoying seeing her stand up to Taya.
“My problem is you, Flake. You aren’t wanted here, and ever since you got back, you’ve caused nothing but trouble. You think you’re so fantastic because you can do all the spells, but you aren’t. You’re the lowest of the low, and I’m going to teach you a lesson.”
Juniper shakes her head like she’s bored of Taya and her constant bullying, and I agree. It’s a Thursday at four pm, and Taya has nothing better to do so she’s on the lookout for mischief to keep herself entertained. She’s obviously decided Juniper is going to be her target today.
“I’m not getting involved in this.” Juniper pushes past Taya with Emmie following closely behind. The pair don’t get far before Taya leaps at Juniper and starts to pull her hair.
“Don’t think you can just walk away from me. When I say I’m going to teach someone a lesson, I mean it. You think you’re above everyone else here, and I’m sick of it. I don’t know what you’ve done to Jacobi, but he’s going to lose his crown because of you. Is that what you want, to punish us all because of some spiteful vendetta? You’re crazy.” Taya pulls back a fist and sends it flying into Juniper’s face.
The grey haired girl, who’s the key to my misfortunes, screams and covers her face as blood starts to pour from her nose. I’ve seen enough. Taya is vicious, and this is getting out of hand. Stepping forwards, several of the other people in the room see me and instantly stand aside. They know better than to argue with me, especially in my current slightly dishevelled state.