by J. C. Burke
So I crouched low and pulled into the barrel. Inside here, I could hide. My very own private room away from everyone. I stood up and stretched my arm, my fingertips skimming the ceiling. The wave felt soft and smooth like perfect silk. Through the tiny hole of the barrel I could see the outside, waiting for me to return. That was the thing, you could never escape reality. No matter how much you wanted to.
Behind me, I could hear the water hiss and spit. It was almost like it was saying, 'Time to go, Georgie. Time to face your mess.'
'Woooooo,' I yelled, as the barrel spat me back out into the world.
It didn't matter how rotten you felt, getting barrelled was the best. Time stopped. Your senses went on overdrive. Nothing could beat it. Nothing.
I was smiling and laughing. It had left me on a total high – and all I wanted to do was tell Jules how fantastic it felt.
*
'So, what's your bungalow like?' Steph asked. She and Jussie were following me up the walkway. 'We stayed in the dolphin one last time. And this time we're in the Seahorse Bungalow.'
'Come and check it out,' I told them.
'Does your bathroom have starfish tiles?' Jussie said. ''Cause the bathroom in the Dolphin Bungalow had dolphin ones and the bathroom in the Seahorse –'
'Yeah, yeah, I get it. It's got starfish tiles.'
'If they'd put you four in the Dolphin Bungalow, would you have asked to move?'
Steph and Jussie weren't joking. They were seriously asking me that, even though Steph didn't bother to stop for the answer. 'You guys must be so happy to be back together. It must've been amazing when Courtney turned up.'
'Mmm.'
'When we were here before, Jake showed us the tag team trophy you won back in January. The engraving says "The Starfish Sisters". He was telling us how close you are.'
'Yeah and at lunch,' Jussie added, 'Ace and Kia were explaining how you'll all be the godmothers of one another's kids and that.'
I stopped at the front door of our place wondering how long I was going to have to keep hearing this.
'That Starfish Sisters thing was really last camp.'
'Oh?' Jussie grunted, then frowned at Steph and shrugged.
I opened the door to our bungalow that looked like a tornado had whipped through it. 'Excuse the mess. Ace is used to having servants.'
Jussie let out a little gasp. She believed that too. Wow, Jussie and Steph, they were a couple of little Einsteins.
Steph went and checked out the bathroom. 'Yeah, starfish tiles, Jussie,' she called.
I went and lay on my bed while they did their inspection. I wondered if they were going to give us a score. Perhaps bungalow hygiene had become part of the selection process.
My mobile was flashing 'message'. The brick landed back in my stomach. Dread. I knew who this was from. But what would it say?
'Have you girls almost finished?' I asked.
'Hey?'
'I really need to go to the toilet.'
I pulled a face that was meant to say 'In a moment there's going to be an explosion. Stay at your own risk!'
'Sorry,' said Jussie, giggling. 'Come on, Steph.'
'See you later,' I called.
'Bye, Georgie,' they chimed together.
My heart was thumping. It was hard to swallow. The brick in my tummy now felt so heavy it was hard to lift my feet.
My finger pressed 'message'. It was from Jules. Three messages actually.
8.11 am: 'when is a good time to call?'
10.42 am: 'where r u?'
12.39 pm: 'georgie I need to speak 2 u. call me.'
I dropped my phone on the bed and began to walk around in circles, which probably wasn't a good idea as my head was already spinning. Should I call him back? What does he want? Maybe he does really . . . no, no he doesn't. Don't go back into that, Georgie! Remember: learn, put it behind you, move on. But if I don't call back then . . .
'I'm going to call you, boy!' I said out loud.
I took a deep breath and pressed Jules's number. He picked up straightaway.
'Georgie?'
'Hey.' My tomato face was already burning. 'Got your messages.'
'Thanks for calling back. I wouldn't blame you if you didn't. I feel hell bad about yesterday.'
'It doesn't matter,' I lied. 'I had a good surf anyway.'
'Yeah?'
'Yeah. So?' I bit my lip. Was I going to live to regret this? 'So, what did you want to talk to me about?'
'It's – it's sort of complicated.'
'What?'
'Is there any way you can meet me somewhere?'
'What? Like now?'
'Can you?'
It was 2.20 pm. Nothing was scheduled until 3.00 pm. Besides, that wasn't going to get in my way and I knew it. 'I could try.'
'The rock?'
'I don't really want to go via the beach.'
'Sure. How about where I saw you the other day? Outside the mini mart.'
'Okay.'
'Ten minutes.'
'Y – ep.' I was almost choking.
'Great! Great.'
My hand almost dropped the phone it was shaking so much. Jules had said 'great' and he sounded like he meant it too.
It was a toss-up between jumping in the shower, washing my hair and getting changed, which I could probably do in ten minutes, versus leaving now looking the way I did, which was pretty shabby, but being on time and having twenty-five minutes with Jules instead of fifteen.
Twenty-five won. Maybe it'd end up being twenty-two 'cause I wasted three minutes brushing my hair, cleaning my teeth and slapping on a bit more deodorant.
I had to get out without being seen. I couldn't even think about what the hell I was actually doing until I was safely on the road. Then – then I could slow down and take a big breath and think about that.
The back path to the tennis courts was clear. I put my head down and ran. I was three seconds to freedom. My hands were literally on the gate, undoing the latch, when I heard a voice behind me.
'Georgie? Where are you going?'
It was Kia.
My fingers curled around the wire of the fence.
'Georgie?'
Maybe I should forget it. Maybe Kia was giving me a chance to turn back and avoid disaster. But I couldn't.
I kept my eyes on the gate. 'Kia, I just have to do something.'
'What?'
'I can't tell you . . . at the moment.'
'Why not?'
'Kia, I've got to go,' I said. 'Promise you won't tell anyone?'
'But what about our . . .?'
'Kia?'
'Okay, okay,' Kia answered. 'I won't tell a soul. Pinky promise.'
I strolled through the gate and down the lane till I was out of view. Then I ran.
Jules was sitting at a table outside the milk bar. His hair was wet and he was wearing a green hoodie. The brick dropped a bit lower in my guts. This time it wasn't dread.
I tucked my hair behind my ears and very carefully crossed the road. This was not the time to be hit by a car.
Jules waved and stood up when he saw me coming. 'Hi.'
'Hi.'
Sitting on the table were two massive family blocks of chocolate. 'That's for you.' He pointed. 'When you need a chocolate fix.'
So this was why I was here? For him to offer me chocolate in return for forgiveness.
The gasp almost escaped from my mouth. Of course, Ace had set this up. She had told Jules to do this. That's what all the texting must've been about last night. Give the fatty some chocolate, Jules, that'll stop her whining about you not turning up.
I had been an idiot – again.
'You like chocolate, don't you, Georgie?'
'Hey?'
'Your face,' Jules said. 'You – you don't look that pleased.'
I sat down and tore the entire wrapper off the family block. It wasn't going to make any difference me sitting here stuffing my face with his chocolate bribe. In fact, I might even shove a couple of pieces up my nose.
I bet Jules had never seen any of his perfect girlfriends do that before.
'You want some?' I asked, not even bothering to close my mouth.
Jules snapped a couple of pieces off and began to chew.
'What?' Jules was smiling at me. 'What's so funny?'
'You,' he said and laughed. 'You're funny. You're good at laughing at yourself. More people should be like that.'
'You've got to be able to laugh,' I said.
'I used to go out with this girl back home called Larissa. She was really good at laughing at herself. She broke my heart, badly. I was fourteen. She was my first proper girlfriend.'
'That's probably why she broke your heart.'
'I don't think it would've mattered if she was my first or tenth girlfriend,' Jules said. 'I just really, really liked her.'
Jules's finger was rubbing up and down the table. Sometimes it'd come so close to my hand I could feel the heat from his fingertip. Suddenly something had changed between us and I probably had chocolate all over my face 'cause I'd been shovelling it in.
'You're like Larissa,' Jules whispered.
I lifted my head. Jules was staring right into my face the way I'd seen him do before.
'I can't stop thinking about you, Georgie.'
My eyes closed and I swallowed. Pushing up against my hand now were all of Jules's fingers.
'Georgie?'
'Yeah?'
'Well?'
I lifted my hand and Jules lifted his. Our fingers wrapped themselves around one another. He squeezed my hand firmly and every molecule of my uncertainty and guardedness and insecurity evaporated, just like that.
'I'm going to break up with Ace,' Jules said. 'I'd been thinking about it anyway. Then when I got that album full of her modelling shots, gee, that just made the decision all the easier. So, what I'm trying to say is that I was already planning on it.' Jules groaned. 'This isn't coming out right, is it? I know that Ace is one of your best friends and I don't want you to feel like you've broken us up.'
'Okay.'
'You know, I'd actually decided I didn't want a girlfriend at all. Training and girlfriends – too hard. But – but – would you want to be my girlfriend?'
'Would you want me to be your girlfriend?'
'Georgie, that's what I'm asking you.'
'D'oh!'
We started laughing. Our heads were touching and our hands were still tangled together. How I wished I hadn't opened my eyes, 'cause I saw my watch and it said three pm.
'I've got to go,' I sighed. 'Back to boot camp.'
'This is going to kill me,' Jules moaned, sending a thunderbolt up my spine and back again.
A little gasp escaped. 'I don't have to super hurry.'
'Yeah?'
'Today's free. I don't mean free free. I mean that the selection process starts from tomorrow.'
'No!' Jules said, standing up and pulling me with him. 'I'm not distracting you. You're not going to end up like Ace in January and not make the team.'
'Do you blame yourself for that?'
'A bit,' Jules said.
Jules wrapped his arm around my waist and I wrapped mine around his. Together we crossed the road and slowly headed back towards camp. For a novice such as myself, I was doing pretty well. It wasn't strange or awkward. I mean, my feet weren't touching the ground but apart from that it felt like I'd been going out with Jules for years.
We talked about Megan getting chucked out and for the first time someone actually asked me how it was going to affect my surfing.
'I don't know,' I answered Jules. 'I feel pretty weird about the Megan thing. It's kind of like I'm in total shock about this girl that I looked up to cheating. Cheating! I still can't believe I'm even saying that word.'
Jules spoke the thought that'd been floating around in my head: 'She obviously wasn't as confident as she seemed.' He squeezed my hand. 'She must've felt threatened.'
'Maybe. Doesn't make me feel any better.' There was another thought floating around in my head. 'Jules, was Larissa pretty?'
'That was a bit random. Where'd that come from?'
'But was she?'
'Yeah, she was.'
'As pretty as Ace?'
'Prettier.'
'Oh,' I squeaked.
'Hey?' Jules stopped. His hands touched my face. Slowly his fingers ran across my cheek, over my lips and stayed there. 'Why are you asking me these questions?'
I shrugged. Talking was just about impossible now anyway.
'I can't stop thinking about you, Georgie. I'm talking about all the time. Okay?'
'Okay,' I whispered.
'I haven't felt like this for a long, long time. You are – divine.'
Just as I was about to faint, Jules picked me up and kissed me.
A long, hard, hungry kiss.
My first.
KIA
'No!' The blood was smeared across the toilet paper. 'Georgie?' I called again. 'Georgie?' I couldn't move. I couldn't get to the door. 'Georgie!' I yelled.
In a second Georgie was flying into the bathroom, with Micki and Ace behind her.
'Kia?' Georgie was wrestling the paper out of my hand. 'What have you – you . . .?'
'It's my period!' I yelled. 'That's where the blood's from.'
'I thought it was –'
'I know,' I mumbled through my teeth while trying to wrestle on my trackie pants and still keep some dignity. 'But it's my period.'
Suddenly the other three got it. This was serious. We were at surf camp. A very important surf camp.
'It's okay. It's okay,' Ace said. 'We can get through this.'
'How?'
'There are ways,' she said.
'What? Stick one of those things up me?' I yelped. 'No way! Won't it hurt?'
'Sweetie, you can't stick a pad in your wetsuit.' Ace was speaking to me like I was about three. I wished I was. Then I wouldn't be in the middle of this disaster. 'Not when you're in the water for like an hour at a time. Okay?'
I looked at Georgie. She was half shaking, half nodding her head. Micki was hiding on her bed. She couldn't even stand talking about blood.
'Ace is right,' Georgie told me. 'The only way around this is tampons.'
'Nooo.' I folded down onto the bathroom floor, pulling my T-shirt over my knees. 'Can I use a pad now?'
'Yeah, but I don't have any,' Georgie answered.
'Me neither,' Ace said.
'Don't look at me,' called Micki. 'I don't even have boobs.'
'Come on.' Ace linked her arm through Georgie's. 'Let's go and ask the other girls.'
Georgie untangled herself from Ace and crossed her arms. 'The office,' she said. 'Carla's office has all that stuff. Or – or I could go down to the shops.'
Georgie was purposely not looking at me. I still hadn't heard what she'd been up to or why she suddenly had to break our pact of no secrets. Anyway, that wasn't my problem now. I had a bigger problem. A big, red one.
'Well, can someone do something?' I asked. 'I, I can't even move.'
'Stick some loo paper in there for now and I'll go down to the office,' Georgie offered.
'I'll go with you,' Ace said.
'No, I can go.' Georgie was stuffing her feet into her ugg boots. 'You stay here with Kia.'
'Get some of the others too,' I heard Ace whisper. 'Carla might have those really mini slim tampons. 'Cause I don't use them and you wouldn't either, would you?'
Georgie grabbed her coat and slammed the door behind her.
'What did I say?' Ace stammered. 'Kia, did – did I say something bad to Georgie just then? Micki?'
'She's just being weird,' I answered.
This was never going to work. The pad that was sitting in my undies made it hard to walk with my legs together, let alone try and jump up on a surfboard. I felt like there were a hundred elastic bands stretching and pulling away in my stomach. But apart from that I was handling it well.
I had been waiting and waiting for my periods but that didn't mean they had to surprise me
this week. Maybe they'd arrived because I'd become more mature, in the head I mean. Everything starts in the brain, so it would make sense.
I called Mum straight away. She got a bit teary that she wasn't here with me but I told her not to worry, that my Starfish Sisters would look after me.
It was Saturday night and we were having a karaoke night in the rec room. We had to do duets. That was the way Carla had organised it. It was like a getting-to-know-you game. It sounded daggy but it was turning out to be heaps of fun.
Micki had to sing 'Oops I Did It Again' with Steph, who seriously thought she had a good voice. Ace and Laura did 'Turn Me Loose', which had everyone in hysterics 'cause Laura kept doing these pelvic thrusts at Ace. Georgie picked 'Greased Lightning' for her and Zena 'cause she knew all the moves. Last was Jussie and me with 'Suddenly I See'. I loved that song. It reminded me of the fashion parade we'd done in this room six months ago.
Then we were on to the second round. We cheered Steph and Laura as they swung each other around to 'You're the One that I Want'.
The system was that Jake would pull the girls' names out of a hat and then we'd choose the song from the board.
'Okay,' Jake called. 'Ace and . . .' he dipped his hand in again and pulled out a name. 'Georgie. Ace and Georgie. This'll be good!'
'No more Grease please,' Laura begged.
Ace jumped up, laughing and clapping her hands. 'Hey, Georgie, let's do Vitamin C "Friends Forever"!'
But Georgie hadn't moved off the floor. Her face was white.
Ace was up there, ready with the microphone. 'Georgie?' She beckoned. 'Come on. Hurry up.'
Now Georgie's face was red. Even redder than her usual tomato face. I gave her a nudge. She pushed my hand away.
'Georgie?' Ace's hands were sitting on her hips. 'You've gone purple!'
Georgie wrapped her arms around her head and buried her face between her knees. 'I can't,' I heard her say.
'What! She says she can't,' I called out. 'Are you embarrassed, Georgie?'
'Come on.' Everyone was starting to yell now. Laura was going, 'Don't be a chicken. Brrk brrk.'
'Chicken! Chicken!' We started clapping. 'Chicken!'
Ace and Jake were shouting the loudest. They'd managed to grab Georgie's hands and were trying to drag her to her feet. 'Come on. Don't be a spoilsport. It's a game.' Ace was squealing and pulling at Georgie's arm like it was the rope in tug of war. 'Come on!'