by J. C. Burke
It was almost dark by the time I got back. Kia was still outside waxing her boards.
I needed a hug. I needed my Starfish Sisters.
'Ace? What is it?'
'Jules just dumped me,' I cried, throwing my arms around her.
'What?' Kia almost pushed me away. She gripped my shoulders. 'Did he say why?'
''Cause I didn't ask him enough about being homesick.'
'Is that all he said?'
'Pathetic, isn't it?' I sniffed. My bottom lip was quivering. 'He was so mean. You have got no idea how mean he was. How – how dare he!'
'Ace, I'm sorry,' Kia said. 'He shouldn't have dumped you, not when you've got all this pressure on you at the moment.'
'I didn't even think of that.' I began to howl. 'That makes him even nastier. If that's actually possible.'
Kia hugged me. 'I'm so sorry, Ace.'
'It's not your fault,' I said. 'You know what? I really didn't see it coming. I think I'm in shock.'
'You probably are.'
'He'll be crawling back to me tomorrow. I just know it. He'd hardly even thought about it.'
'Just say he doesn't?'
'He will.' I gulped. 'I mean, if you're supposedly so lonely and homesick then why would you ditch your girlfriend?'
Kia sighed but said nothing. Not that I blamed her. I was rabbiting on. I wasn't making any sense.
'Are you coming up with me or are you going to finish your boards?' I asked.
'I want to get this last one done.'
'I'm going to find Georgie. I want to –'
'She's asleep,' Kia blurted.
'I'll wake her. It's dinner soon anyway.'
'I – I wouldn't. I think she's exhausted. She – she said she might even sleep through dinner and not to wake her under – under any circumstances.'
'Hang on, Kia.' Now I remembered Georgie was in the rec room watching Juno when I snuck out. Even though she was inside she was wearing her coat and I'd almost asked if I could borrow it. I didn't 'cause the others would've asked where I was going. 'She must've changed her mind about the sleep. Anyway, I need to find her.'
Lauren, Zena, Micki and Shyan were lounging around the rec room as the credits for Juno rolled up the screen.
'That was so good,' Shyan was saying. 'Not that I want you girls to think that having a baby when you're a teenager is that simple.'
I crept out of the doorway. Luckily for me, I wasn't spotted. I was not up to an interrogation on why I'd been crying. All I'd have to say was 'I've been dumped' and I knew the tears would turn back on like the automatic sprinklers at Dad's house.
Georgie wasn't in the bungalow either. The place looked like it'd been ransacked. There were clothes, most of them mine or Georgie's, piled up on the floor, thrown over chairs, hanging off the beds, bursting out of the wardrobes and peeking out of the drawers. It actually put a smile on my face and for that second I didn't feel so sad. But it also made me want to find Georgie all the more.
We'd had a bad start since I'd arrived at camp. Georgie was unbelievably angry with me for reading Micki's diary. She felt like she'd been set up, like I'd used her. But I didn't tell her how I'd found out about Micki living with Kia's family 'cause I knew I'd done a low, low thing. Maybe if I'd told Georgie the truth right from the start then none of this would've happened. But I didn't and it had happened. The important thing was that Georgie and I were falling back into place. Slower than I would've liked but it was happening.
It was hard to believe I'd only known Georgie six months because I couldn't imagine my life without her. She was the greatest friend I'd ever had. I had told her stuff that I wouldn't ever, ever tell anyone else. Just the idea of other people knowing anything about me made goose bumps crawl up my scalp.
Right at the top of the grass, near the tennis courts, I could see a figure in a green coat. It was Georgie. Before I knew it I was running across the lawn shouting from the bottom of my lungs, 'Georgie! Georgie!'
The wind had the tears flying off my face, getting tangled in my hair, spilling into my mouth. 'Jules dumped me!' I cried, throwing my arms around her shoulders. 'He was horrible.'
Georgie patted my back. 'I'm sorry,' she whispered. 'I'm really sorry, Ace.'
But I didn't want Georgie to pat me like Jules had. I wanted her to hold me tight and hug me.
GEORGIE
How was it possible to feel so rotten and yet so unbelievably happy?
I had just discovered that we don't always do what's good for us. I had issued the come-and-stuff-up-my-life giant an open invitation, and I'd had a smile on my face when I'd given it too.
Every time I thought of Jules my heart would do a triple backflip and when I thought of Ace, that backflip would land splat, face down against my ribcage, my heart puffing and panting and swearing it would never try that again. Not that Ace deserved me feeling bad for her. What she'd done to Micki was a lousy thing and as far as I was concerned it didn't matter how many times she said sorry.
Kia'd said to me the other day, when we saw Jules up at the shops, 'You're only human.' So what was I meant to do when Jules said I was 'divine'? Divine? No one had ever hinted at me being even a little bit divine.
So when the world's hottest and nicest guy wrapped his hand around mine and said, 'Would you want to be my girlfriend?' was I meant to answer, 'That's all very nice but I'm obligated to inform you that currently my friend Ace is your girlfriend?' I would challenge any girl in Australia to be able to resist Jules and say that.
If it had been the other way around and Jules was my boyfriend but he decided he liked Ace, would Ace put me and our friendship ahead of hooking up with Jules? No way. Ace adored the boys loving her. That was the way she saw herself, as the Ocean Pearl girl who had random guys, like the one at Pete's milkbar back home, plastering their walls with posters of her and panting like excited dogs when she was around.
In my opinion, that's why Ace had freaked out so much when her hair started falling out. For the first time in her life, she was confronted with the possibility of not being beautiful. In Ace's brain, not being beautiful meant no adoring guys falling at her feet, which meant no life. So, how did she think girls like me coped?
Sometimes, usually when I was feeling flat, Mum would break into a speech: 'Georgie, there are plenty of fish in the sea that aren't after the neat, pretty girls that don't suck up too much brain power.' I always needed about sixty seconds to recover from that comment 'cause I was aware what category Mum had me in. 'There are plenty of fish in the sea that want a girl with personality. A girl they can talk and laugh with. Someone who's fun. Who is comfortable about who they are and not who they think they should be.' By the time Mum finished that speech my smile was usually upside down and sliding southwards.
'Be patient, Georgie,' she'd say. 'He'll find you one day.'
And he had. Unfortunately he'd found Ace first.
It was almost two am and I still wasn't able to get to sleep. Excitement and guilt were to blame. There were two scenes from today playing tag in my head. One had pictures and sound; one just had sound. They didn't overlap; they weren't fighting for my attention. Politely they'd wait for the other one to finish before taking to the stage and having their turn.
The scene I wanted to revisit the most just had sound. It was me and Jules talking on the phone this afternoon.
'Hey,' Jules'd said, 'is it safe to talk?'
'Yeah.' Jules's voice made me squeeze my eyes shut so I could breathe in his sound. 'I'm up the top near the tennis courts. It's good reception here, better than the bungalow.'
'I just dumped Ace. It was bad,' he told me. 'Maybe not quite as bad as I thought it'd be. She didn't go psycho.'
'I don't think Ace does psycho.'
Jules laughed. 'She was shocked. I could tell that.'
'Was she crying?'
'Not with me. Ace is tough, Georgie.'
'She's also very soft and squishy.'
We both sighed at the same time. My sigh was 'cause my he
art felt like it was being squeezed up my throat. I didn't want to comfort Ace and hear her version of events. I wanted to be with Jules. But that was impossible.
I knew I'd have to hold Ace's hand while she banged on and on about how horrible Jules was. I also knew that I wouldn't be able to say what was itching my tongue: 'Ace, the way you treat people, shutting Jules out of your life, prying into Micki's privacy, what do you really expect? Just to get away with it because you're Ace?'
'You're too nice, Georgie,' Jules told me. 'I think you see a different Ace to me. Anyway, you've got a job. This is classic, Georgie. I almost lost it.'
'What?'
'Ace wants her album back. She's scared I'm going to sell the photos on eBay.'
'What!'
'And she's sending you to get it off me.'
'She said that?' I didn't know whether to be angry or elated.
'"Georgie will call you to arrange a time to collect it." That came out of her mouth like you were her personal assistant.'
'What will I say?'
'Say you'll do it,' Jules answered. 'We'll get to see each other. I leave for the Gold Coast in two days and then when I get back you'll be gone.'
'I know. I know,' I said. 'I'm just – I don't know, it's such a mess.'
'Georgie, you've done nothing wrong. You didn't come on to me. Even though I wish you had.' He chuckled and my knees went to jelly. 'You didn't tell me to dump Ace. I made that decision before you and I even went surfing. And I fell for you that day in the surf. I remember the exact moment.'
'Yeah?'
'I'd just got nailed for about the fifth time. My leg rope came undone, I lost my board, I was caught in a rip and getting dumped and you appeared out of nowhere dragging my board behind you. You paddled up to me and you were laughing. "Gutsy!" you said. "That was a little monster you went for. You nearly had it too," and there was this incredible smile on your face. You looked so happy and it made me feel happy too. Man, I was all yours. You had me then.'
I gulped and stars swam around my head.
I remembered laughing and stirring him heaps in the surf. Until now, I'd had no idea what was going on in his mind. To me, we were just having heaps of fun and getting on so well, like we'd known each other forever.
Jules and I said goodbye. I slipped my phone back into the pocket of my coat and savoured a feeling like tiny fairies dancing on my skin.
As if it was a puzzle, I wanted to piece together every second of that afternoon surfing with him. Maybe there was something I'd be able to remember about the way he'd looked at me.
I didn't want to go straight back to the bungalow or the rec room where the girls were watching Juno. I wanted to be on my own so I could think about every word Jules had said to me. I was desperate to hear them all again – the sound of his voice when he'd said things like, 'You had me then.'
But just as I tried, the other scene from today – the one with sound and pictures – started playing in my head, ruining everything and making me feel sick inside.
At first, I'd heard her voice and the hairs on my neck stood up to attention. Then Ace was running towards me, sobbing and spluttering.
'Jules dumped me. He was horrible,' she cried, throwing her arms around me and howling into the curve of my neck.
I tried, I did – I mean, I knew this was going to happen – but I just couldn't make my arms wrap themselves around her. 'I'm sorry, Ace,' I whispered. 'I'm really sorry.'
'Hug me.' Ace pulled at my arms and folded them around her. 'I need a hug, Georgie. Please don't be mad with me anymore.'
'I'm – not – mad – with you, Ace.' It took a tonne of effort to form each word, let alone make them loud enough to be heard.
'Jules was so mean,' Ace said. 'I've never seen that side of him.'
'He probably felt bad.'
'So he should've! I mean, as Kia just said, what a dickhead dumping me while I'm here at camp trying out for the national team. How – how selfish!'
'So Kia knows about you and Jules?' I swallowed.
'Yeah,' Ace answered. 'I think I need a Starfish Sisters night.' She snuggled into my shoulder. 'You know, how we used to have them when we pulled our doonas and pillows onto the floor. Can we?'
'I'm not the boss.'
I felt awkward as I walked across the lawn. My body was stiff like a plank of wood. Plus I had this living thing attached to me like a limpet and it was weighing me down.
But in anyone else's mind, it was Ace and me going down to dinner, our arms comfortably draped around each other like only real friends could do.
It was almost two-thirty am and my eyelids were getting heavier and heavier. The peaceful breaths of Kia, Micki and Ace floated up from the floor.
I swung around to the end of my bed and looked down at them. They were tangled up in doonas and pillows. Kia's arm was resting on Micki's legs and Ace's feet were on Kia's stomach.
My excuse for not being down there with them was that I felt sick in the stomach. Technically, that wasn't a lie 'cause the brick in my guts was so heavy I could hardly swallow.
Not that I knew what was and what wasn't a lie anymore. The only thing I knew about lies was that I was drowning in them. But we don't always do what's best for us. I had willingly taken a deep breath and dived into the traitor's sea of deception.
As much as I wanted to, I couldn't blame anyone except myself.
For a couple of hours, the girls had chatted away while I'd pretended to be asleep.
Micki had hardly spoken but then she didn't exactly get much of an opportunity. From watching Micki, I could tell that she'd become wary of Ace. There were little things I noticed, like she didn't initiate any conversations with Ace. She'd talk to her and stuff but she'd never actually start it. Just looking at them sleeping on the floor said it all. The only two girls not touching were Micki and Ace.
I wouldn't be surprised if Micki never forgave Ace. It was certain that Micki'd never forget and deep inside her heart I reckon she'd never feel the same about her. I didn't blame Micki 'cause I felt like that too. Ace didn't deserve our forgiveness.
Last night, the only words of Kia's I'd heard were things like 'I'm so sorry' and 'You must feel awful.' Although she did actually dare to tell Ace that she wouldn't take Jules back. I wondered if that was for me.
Kia was totally unimpressed with me. She wouldn't look at me. She wouldn't speak to me. When I asked her to pass the salt at dinner, she'd slid it across with such aggro it almost skidded off the table. No one seemed to notice though.
The only time Kia spoke to me all night was as we filed into the rec room for our evening's entertainment with Don Chambers, the national head coach. 'Happy?' she'd whispered through her teeth. 'I thought you were going to tell Jules not to dump her this week.'
There was no point telling Kia that I had. Jules'd thought about it for a bit then decided he couldn't wait. 'If I'm still with Ace,' he explained, 'but texting you and meeting up with you and thinking only about you, then doesn't that make it worse, Georgie?'
I didn't say anything back. I couldn't. The idea that Jules could think only about me had me gasping for air.
What should have been the highlight of the day was when Jake announced at dinnertime that Ocean Pearl had offered Micki sponsorship. The three of us had asked Jake to make a special announcement because we knew Micki wouldn't tell anyone herself. Out of the surf, that was the most united thing we'd done all week. But it was for Micki, so it was worth it.
Micki had told us beforehand about the OP sponsorship. She was pretty shy about it and nervous about Ace's reaction, but then Micki wasn't one to pump herself up. She'd be the last person to be in your face. But I did think she'd be just a tad more excited about it.
Ace was cool. She actually genuinely didn't seem that worried. She said, 'Good on you, Micki, you really deserve it.' After that she gave Micki a hug. Micki kind of stood there like a tin soldier but if Ace noticed it, she didn't let on.
Naturally, Kia and I were already screa
ming and bouncing around 'cause we were so, so happy for her.
Later that night when I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth, Micki was already in there brushing hers.
'You okay?' I asked, 'cause in the mirror I could see her frowning.
'You know, Ocean Pearl probably want to sponsor you too, Georgie.'
'Maybe.' I'd shrugged.
I still didn't know why almost two weeks ago Andy Wallace had left a message at our place. But what I did know was that the reason I'd avoided calling him back was 'cause I was worried about hurting Ace.
KIA
My hands were tightly folded behind my back to stop them from slapping Georgie across the face a couple of times. Georgie wasn't doing a good job of hiding the fact that she didn't want to be in our tag team and it wasn't making us look like a very good potential national team. The entire selection panel were down at the beach to watch us do our stuff and I'm sure they weren't impressed. I wouldn't have been.
Jake seemed pissed off, 'cause he was speaking through his teeth. 'Georgie, I want you to stay with your Starfish Sisters.'
'I thought we were called group one,' she replied.
'No arguing, Georgie.'
'What is Georgie playing at?' Ace whispered to me.
I shrugged, tempted to say, 'You don't want to know.'
Georgie did a sort of a huffy turn and crossed the sand to where Micki, Ace and I were standing.
'Zena, you're captain of your team,' Jake instructed. He was doing a good job of ignoring the bad vibe Georgie had brought to the beach. 'And Georgie, you're captain of the Starfish Sisters.'
That was the other thing I wanted to call out: 'Jake, Georgie's resigned from the Starfish Sisters. She's just too gutless to tell anyone.'
Georgie was chewing the inside of her cheeks as Jake rattled off the rules of the tag team contest. 'Captains in first, they select the take-off zone and you must stick to it or you'll be disqualified and your score will be deducted from the team's points.'
'Right out the left peak.' Ace prodded Georgie's back.
Georgie spun around and snapped. 'Yeah, got it!'