by A M Snead
Garrett kissed Jack’s head and let his lips linger against his hair. “That night you told me about Jill’s boyfriend and why you were afraid to care for someone that way…I was supposed to tell you my story as well. We just…didn’t make it that far.” He caressed his fingertips down Jack’s back. “When my dad left my mom, it destroyed her. It hurt her in a way that terrified her of being hurt like that again. If she felt herself getting close to someone, she would ditch them and run.” He swallowed hard and pressed his lips to Jack’s warm scalp. “Leave them before they could leave her. And she taught that rule to me. That if I ever felt myself falling, then to run away as fast as I could. Don’t get caught.”
“Is that what happened with Scotty?” Jack whispered. “You were running away?”
“No,” Garrett said. “The thing was, I grew up on this rule, and I was afraid to trust love…but I still craved the intimacy of other people…lovers. So, I started substituting sex for love. I think that’s what originally drew me to porn. But then I met Scotty and I’d never had anyone want to be with me so bad. And I liked how it felt, but I was still holding back and replacing actual love with sex. And Scotty…” He looked down at the sleeping boy and ran his hand over his head. “Scotty’s life had taught him that sex equaled love. He thought if a man had sex with him…it had to mean he cared for him. Maybe it’s how he dealt with his abuse, convincing himself that they wouldn’t be doing those things to him if they didn’t love him.” His chest squeezed. “All I know is that we were both in the relationship for the wrong reasons. In a sense, we both were confusing sex with love. It wasn’t healthy, and we weren’t good for each other, because neither of us really understood what it meant to be in love. We only understood sex.”
Jack shifted against him and traced his fingertips on his chest. “And what about us?” he asked softly.
Lifting Jack’s chin, Garrett kissed his lips. “I knew it was different with us from the moment I met you.”
“How did you know?”
Garrett smiled. “Because as turned on as I was by you…I would have still wanted to be with you even if you’d told me I had to wait months before I could make love to you.” His rubbed his thumb over Jack’s cheek. “It didn’t take me long to realize it was your heart that I craved most. And for the first time in my life”—he laid another kiss on Jack’s mouth—“I understood what it meant to be in love.”
♥
“Is there a problem?” Pratt asked when Gideon entered the office with Lucas and Derek. The two young men hung back by the door, merely there as witnesses to the conversation that would ensue. Whatever exchange took place between him and his cameraman, Gideon didn’t want it coming down to his word against Pratt’s.
The man was standing, and Gideon motioned for him to take a seat as he walked around behind his desk and sat down. The last thing he wanted to do right now was have this conversation. He needed to be with his boys, make sure Mickey was all right and…find the proper care for Scotty.
He looked across the desk at Pratt; had he brought a threat into his own house? Put his boys at risk? He had hired Pratt not long after Scotty had come to them. His credentials checked out, his background was clean. Gideon had had no cause to think he was a danger. He’d never really clicked with the man on a friend level, but some people just didn’t click with other. It didn’t mean they were bad people. Should Gideon have paid closer attention? Taken into account that none of his boys were friends with Pratt? They joked and flirted with the others on the camera crew, but never Pratt. Should that have been a glaring red flag that something was off about the man?
Hindsight is twenty-twenty. Just deal with what’s in front of you now.
Gideon sighed. He wasn’t in the mood for pleasantries. “Some very unfortunate events have taken place, and you’ve been implicated.”
Pratt stared at him, stunned. “What?” He cast a frigid glance at Lucas and Derek, then looked hard at Gideon. “What unfortunate events?”
His throat knotting, Gideon said, “Mickey was attacked. Choked until he passed out.”
His eyes widening, Pratt shot another look at Lucas and Derek. “And…what?” His brow knit with an uncertain frown as he turned his eyes back on Gideon. “You…you think I did it?” Before Gideon could respond, Pratt leaned forward and gripped the edge of the desk. “Why the hell would I hurt Mickey?”
“I’m not saying that you did.” Gideon spoke with a calmness he didn’t feel. “But you have been implicated. And I need to know why.”
Pratt stood up quick. “Who the fuck said I did it?”
“Sit down,” Gideon instructed. “I need to get to the bottom of this and I’m not in the mood for outbursts.”
The man sank back into his chair, his face hard with tension. “I’m sorry, but do you really expect me to take it lightly when I’m accused of hurting one of the boys?”
“Of course not,” Gideon murmured.
Pratt rubbed his mouth. “Is Mickey okay?”
“Yes,” Gideon said. “Bailey took him into the hospital to be checked by a doctor, but he seems to be all right.”
Releasing a hard breath, Pratt stared at him. “I have the right to know who made accusations against me. Especially ones of this magnitude. Don’t I?”
“You do,” Gideon agreed. “But first, I need to clear up some other issues.”
“What other issues?”
Gideon leaned back and exhaled slowly. “Have you been making advances on Jack?”
“Excuse me?” Pratt frowned. “Is…is Jack the one saying I attacked Mickey?”
“No,” Gideon countered. “But I’m asking you—have you made advances toward him?”
Pratt went silent, eyes crisp. “Yes,” he murmured stiffly. “I have. I realize it was out of line and I won’t do so again.”
Gideon stared at him dully. “Or talk shit about Garrett?”
“What?” Pratt shook his head. “What the hell…” His lips tightened, and breath surged through his nostrils. “Look, Garrett obviously used Jack—just like he used Scotty—I was just trying to spare the boy some grief.”
“Hey, fuck you!” Lucas stormed forward. “Garrett didn’t use anyone. You’re the fucking prick who used Scotty.”
“Whoa.” Derek lunged after him, grabbing Lucas’ arm, restraining him. “Easy there, Rambo.”
Pratt was on his feet again, glaring at Lucas. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“Enough!” Gideon ordered. “Lucas, back off. I got this. Pratt…” He leaned forward and stabbed a finger at the chair. “Sit down.”
“What the hell is going on?” Pratt sank down into the chair almost cautiously, shooting Gideon with a suspicious look. “What is he talking about?”
“The night of Jack’s initiation at the club,” Gideon said. “Were you with Scotty?”
“What do you mean with?”
Lucas stepped forward, jerking against Derek’s hand which still gripped his arm. “Did you fuck him?”
“Lucas.” Gideon shot him a stern look. “Please.”
“Did I…?” Pratt stared at him without finishing.
“Scotty said you were with him that night,” Gideon told him. “Were you?”
An anxious look crept across Pratt’s face. “Yes,” he murmured.
Lucas swore quietly but stifled another outburst. Gideon looked at Pratt. “What made you think it was okay to have sex with him? At any point did I give you any indication that I would be okay with that? Scotty isn’t like the other boys, he reads too much into that kind of attention.”
“I didn’t mean for it to happen,” Pratt insisted. “I heard Scotty crying and I went in to see if he was okay. He was really upset and didn’t want to be alone. He asked me if I would stay and talk to him for a little while. So, I did.” He shrugged. “Like I said, he was upset, and I tried to comfort him. Things went too far. I didn’t plan for it to happen.”
“You fucking…” Lucas muttered and turned his back to them, raking his hand through
his hair.
Gideon sighed and rubbed his eyes. He didn’t feel like they were getting anywhere, not really. Maybe he was looking for signs in Pratt’s behavior to indicate he was the culprit Scotty insisted he was—anything to give Gideon cause to doubt that the boy had such deep mental problems.
Mickey wouldn’t lie about something like that and you know it. You have to face reality before this gets any worse.
“Did you tell Scotty he could call you Garrett?” Gideon asked quietly, just wanting this to be over. “That it was okay to pretend?”
Pratt licked his lips and nodded. “Yes. He needed the escape, to pretend for just a little while that he was with Garrett and Garrett loved him…and not Jack.”
“So, you just played into the fantasy?” Gideon shook his head. “You can’t do that with someone like Scotty.”
“I realized my mistake,” Pratt said. “I didn’t keep on seeing him after that.”
“So that wasn’t you hitting on him in the kitchen?” Lucas demanded. “The twins saw you.”
“I was just talking to him,” Pratt snapped. “The twins are sweet boys, but everyone knows they aren’t quite as…mentally mature as the rest of us. They misinterpreted what they saw, obviously.”
Gideon stared at him. “Not as mentally mature?” he murmured. “You think they’re…simple minded? Is that what you’re saying?”
“You know how they are,” Pratt insisted. “They’re like children…who know how to fuck.”
“Are you implying they’re stupid?” Lucas jerked loose of Derek. “Why? Because they’ve managed to retain some innocence within this shitty world?”
“I’m not ridiculing them,” Pratt said. “They’re beautiful boys and sweet as honey, but I’m just saying…maybe they don’t always grasp things the way we do.”
“You know what—fuck you,” Lucas snapped. “There’s not a fucking thing wrong with the way the twins grasp things. They’re both smart as a fucking whip. And they know what they saw.”
“Whatever,” Pratt muttered and looked at Gideon. “What does any of this have to do with what happened to Mickey? I didn’t lay a fucking finger on him.”
Gideon nodded slowly. He pursed his lips then asked quietly, “Have you and Scotty ever gone out in the woods together?”
“The woods?” Pratt frowned and shook his head. “No. I’ve never gone anywhere with Scotty.” He shifted in the chair, stiff with tension. “What the hell is all this really about?”
Releasing a slow breath, Gideon met his stare. “I want you to take two weeks’ paid leave.”
“What?”
“Just until I get some things cleared up around here.”
“Are you going to fire me?” Pratt stared at him uncertainly. “I know I overstepped my bounds, but it won’t happen again.”
“Just take your two-week paid vacation,” Gideon said. “I’ll be in touch.”
Pratt stood with a huff. “I don’t believe this,” he muttered and brushed past Lucas and Derek on his way out of the office. The door closed hard behind him.
Gideon sighed heavily and ran his fingers slowly through his hair.
“Sorry about…” Lucas mumbled.
Gideon waved his hand absently. “Don’t worry about it.” He shoved his hand through his hair again and stared at the desktop.
“You okay, boss?” Derek asked with quiet concern.
Shaking his head, Gideon stood up. “No,” he whispered, a thickness in his throat. “Not fucking okay at all.”
78 “The hardest Thing I’ll Ever Have To Do”
Jack stepped out of Garrett’s bedroom and closed the door. Garrett, Lucas, Bailey, and Derek lingered in the hall. “Are the boys asleep?” Garrett asked quietly.
“Almost,” Jack murmured. No one wanted the twins sleeping alone tonight, not after what they’d been through. Garrett’s bed was large, so he had Jack put them in there.
“Poor babies,” Bailey whispered. His gaze drifted distantly to the floor.
Jack glanced at the others. “Why wouldn’t Gideon let any of us go with him?” he asked thickly. “He shouldn’t have to do this alone.”
“He blames himself.” Lucas shook his head, voice low, strained. “He feels that if he had gotten Scotty some help before now…maybe he wouldn’t have regressed so far. What he has to do now, he sees as his responsibility and no one else’s.”
“I should have gone too,” Garrett said. “Whether he wanted me to or not. This is my fault, too.”
“Don’t do that, man,” Derek murmured, anguish in his eyes. “What happened between you and Scotty didn’t cause this.”
Bailey nodded. “He’s right, Garrett,” he sighed. “Mental conditions of this caliber don’t manifest in the short term. If anyone is to blame, it’s the fuckers in his past who abused him. There’s nothing we can do for Scotty now but show our support and let him know we care about him.”
“Maybe something we should have been doing more of before all this shit,” Lucas muttered and rubbed his mouth.
“Lucas,” Bailey said quietly. “We tried. Scotty was clearly more damaged than any of us realized. Sometimes even when someone wants help, wants to accept offered friendship…they still withdraw from it. It’s a type of fear instilled by repeated abuse and betrayal. I don’t think Scotty knew how to trust others. It wasn’t his fault, and it wasn’t ours. He is a victim of past circumstances.” He touched Lucas’ arm. “Just know, Scotty is in good hands.”
Lucas nodded and pulled him close. He kissed his head. “I know,” he whispered. “Thank you.”
“Do you think Gideon is going to let Pratt come back?” Jack wondered. He would feel a hell of a lot better if the man never returned.
“I fucking hope not.” Lucas scowled. “After admitting he was with Scotty that night, and his shit talk about Garrett and the twins? If I never see that fucker again, it’ll be too soon.”
“Hear, hear.” Derek nodded. “He said he regretted being with Scotty, but he didn’t sound all that remorseful.”
Garrett rubbed his eyes. “The other guys are asking a lot of questions about what’s going on, what happened to Mickey and how Scotty was involved.”
“Gideon wants this kept quiet for now,” Lucas said. “It stays between us until he has a chance to decide just what he wants to tell them all.”
Shaking his head, Garrett stared blankly down the hall. “I can’t believe this is fucking happening,” he whispered tightly.
“But Scotty is getting the help he needs, right?” Jack murmured. “I mean, he will get better…won’t he?”
“We can only pray that he does,” Bailey whispered.
The small group disbanded a short while later and Jack and Garrett retreated inside Garrett’s room. The twins were wrapped around each other under the blankets, asleep in the middle of the bed. Jack gazed at them. Mickey’s arm hugged Marcus’ head, his face pressed against Marcus’ hair, tear stains on his cheeks.
“They look so fragile,” Jack said quietly.
Garrett wrapped his arms around Jack from behind and kissed his head. “They’re tough,” he whispered. “They’ll get through this.”
Jack leaned back against him. “And Scotty?”
Swallowing thickly, Garrett murmured, “I hope so.”
Exhaustion weighed down Jack’s eyes. “God, I’m so tired,” he sighed and sagged against Garrett’s chest. “I feel like someone beat me good and hard.”
Garrett nuzzled his neck and planted a soft kiss on his skin. “I think that was me.”
Jack smiled. “Yes,” he whispered. “Now that you mention it, I believe it was you.” His heartbeat quickened as Garrett held him tighter and brushed his lips against his ear.
“I love you, Jack Heart.”
Warmth swept through Jack’s body, dispelling a small measure of the chill that had settled in earlier. “I love you, too.”
“We should go to bed,” Garrett murmured. “Snuggle up to our boys and try to get some sleep.” He hugged
Jack tighter and added with a strain to his voice, “Gideon is going to need all the emotional support he can get.”
“Do you think he’ll come home tonight?”
Garrett shook his head. “No.”
It wasn’t late, but Garrett’s suggestion for rest appealed to Jack. Garrett released him, and they began to undress one another. Jack longed to make love to Garrett, ease the hurt in their hearts left behind by the day’s awful events, but with the twins in the bed with them, that wasn’t really an option. On any other occasion, Mickey and Marcus’ presence between the sheets would guarantee much loving would take place. But not tonight.
They dressed down to their briefs and stopped there. Garrett pulled Jack into his arms and kissed him deeply as their bodies naturally responded to one another. A soft groan swelled in Garrett’s throat and he rubbed his hands slowly up Jack’s bare back. “God, Jack,” he murmured against Jack’s mouth. “I need you so bad right now.”
Jack moaned and didn’t resist when Garrett’s hands ventured lower and cupped his ass cheeks through his snug briefs. Everything went hazy and Jack was only partially aware of moving to the window, his palms flattened against the cool glass as Garrett stripped away his underwear, his wanton hands caressing his bare skin, warm lips showering kisses across his shoulders and his neck.
“Uuuhh…” Jack gasped quietly as he was filled with Garrett’s hardness. He struggled to stifle his cries of passion and ecstasy—not wishing to wake the twins—as Garrett pushed into him again and again. They found their rhythm and Jack clutched the window, his hot breath steaming the glass with each forceful gasp that puffed from his lips.
Garrett shuddered and groaned, his arms locked tightly, protectively around Jack’s body, his hips molded to Jack’s firm ass as he rocked and thrust with a sensual rhythm that carried Jack away to a peaceful place.
“Yes…” he moaned softly, breathlessly. “Garrett…”
The stress of the day and their heightened emotions ushered them hurriedly toward release, their cries of love swelling out of their control and echoing off the bedroom walls as their hearts and bodies surrendered to one another.