Genrenauts: Season One

by Michael R. Underwood

  “What brings you two here?” Mallery asked, gesturing to the restaurant. They’d drawn some attention already and would probably get more before all was said and done.

  The doctor’s gaze could have pierced Kevlar. Not that anyone in the situation could easily say, “We’re clearly on a date, and you’re intruding.”

  No one had any weapons, but this was turning out to be no less a combat than the shootout in Western World. Every look, every word was as calculated as the swing of a sword or pull of a trigger.

  Theo filled the tense silence. “I wanted to thank Dr. Thorsson for everything she’s done, and she suggested dinner here, since I mentioned it when I was in traction.”

  “I’d heard about the restaurant since I started as a resident, and this was a perfect chance to celebrate.” The doctor wrapped an arm around Theo’s, staking her claim physically as well as verbally.

  This kind of jockeying for relationship position was infinitely easier to parse up close when you weren’t the one in the middle of it—hormones and anxiety giving you tunnel vision and making your tongue feel like dried leather and ash.

  “Of course,” Anna said. “Theo and I came here all the time. In fact, this was where Theo proposed to me.”

  SHOTS FIRED. SHOTS FIRED, Leah thought.

  The Doctor tensed. “Oh, really. I hadn’t heard.”

  “Theo, could we talk for a minute, just the two of us?” Anna asked.

  Yes. Go, go! Leah thought.

  The Doctor didn’t let go. “Anything you want to say, you can say to me.”

  “Now, dear, I think that’s Theo’s decision, isn’t it?” Mallery asked, all smiles and Georgia charm.

  All eyes were on Theo. “Of course,” he said. “Do you want to step outside?”

  “No need, darling. The doctor is welcome to join us at our table while you talk here,” Mallery said.

  Leah raised with her slightly overfull glass. “We’ve got wine.”

  The doctor doubled down. “Theo, this is really…”

  Shirin walked by, giving Leah the opening for the pick. Leah shifted her weight left to right, bumping Shirin’s tray. She recoiled from the bump, guiding her hand and glass to slosh forward and out of her glass.

  Right onto the doctor’s dress. Bull’s-eye.

  Leah dropped her glass, spilling more wine on both the doctor’s and her shoes. “Ohmigod, I’m so sorry.”

  Shirin disappeared as quickly as she’d come, her job complete.

  “Oh, dear. Honey, let’s get you two cleaned up.” Mallery and Leah double-teamed the doctor with apologies and aggressive helpfulness, making for the restroom, leaving Theo and Anna on their own.

  Okay, hon. We cleared the way. Now it’s all up to you, Leah thought.

  * * *

  Shirin went to make a gesture of cleaning herself off. Mostly, she kept one eye and both ears on the lovers, finally alone together again.

  Anna led off, but her confidence was waning. She broke eye contact and looked at the table, down at his leg. “I tried to visit, but your date said you didn’t want to see me.”

  “She what? She said that you didn’t come. That they called you and you didn’t answer.”

  “Not at first. I was out of town, then all the flights back were delayed and then cancelled. I spent seventy-two hours in an airport trying to get back to you.” Anna looked up, searched for eye contact. “You put a big ball in my court when I really didn’t want anything else big and amazing and scary to think about.”

  Theo wrung his hands but met Anna’s eyes. “I thought it was the best time, that now that everything was coming together for you…”

  “I know. It was just…”

  A moment. “It was too much at once,” Theo said. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I just knew how excited you were to make a change, to have a path that gave you freedom and security. And I thought I could be part of that.”

  “It wasn’t about you or about the ring. I had to process things one at a time.” She took a breath. “I’m taking the partnership.”

  Anna pulled a box out of her purse and knelt. The diamond caught the light from the candelabra overhead, glittering bright for the whole room to see.

  “That’s not all I want. Will you be my partner, Theo Long? Do you think we can still do this? Because I really hope the answer is yes.” Tears welled in Anna’s eyes, her voice shaking but not breaking. “And I can’t promise that I won’t need to be random, I can’t promise I’ll be tidy, but I do promise that I will love you every day.”

  A hundred thoughts must have gone through Theo’s head in that moment, doubt and hope, self-conscious uncertainty and love.

  But in the end, love won out.

  Theo took the ring and Anna’s hand, helping her back to her feet as he steadied himself on the chair.

  “Of course. Of course I will.”

  Shirin coughed into her collar, then said, “We have reconciliation. Time to clean up,” transmitting to the team. Then she smiled and started planning her exfiltration.

  * * *

  Dr. Thorsson waved them off of her when they got to the bathroom. Mallery positioned herself by the door, making a big gesture out of dabbing Leah’s shirt, the two women blocking the doctor from being able to get out.

  “You utter, complete klutz!” the Doctor said, dabbing furiously at her shirt and leggings.

  “I’m so sorry,” Leah said.

  “It was an accident, Doc. No need to raise your voice. My poor Toni’s out a pair of shoes that are at least as expensive as that top.”

  Dr. Thorsson adjusted herself, looking in the mirror. “It’s not about the shirt.”

  “Oh, what, the boy?” Mallery asked. “Honey, you’ve already lost. These two would already be engaged if it weren’t for that wild driver. Your Florence Nightingale act was never going to work.”

  “It wasn’t an act,” the doctor said. “He’s the first decent guy to cross my path in years. He needs structure, support.”

  “Let’s let Theo decide what he needs, okay?” Leah said.

  The doctor made for the door, stopping just inside Leah and Mallery’s personal space bubble. “If he’s going to decide, I need to at least be there.”

  “Give them a minute to sort things out, then you can go out there and break things off like a responsible adult.”

  “Actually, do you swing both ways? I’ve got an ex out here. I think you’d get along fabulously,” Leah said, remembering a preppy lawyer from the online dating reports they’d run.

  “I don’t need to be set up. I need you to step aside so I can save Theo from making the wrong decision and ruining his life.”

  Mallery looked sideways to Leah, as if to ask telepathically, “Think she’s worked up enough?”

  Before Leah could answer, Shirin’s all-clear came through the comms. Leah nodded.

  “Why don’t you go back out there and see what’s really happening?” Mallery said.

  The doctor pushed past the pair and shoved the door open, heading back into the restaurant.

  “Are we done?”

  Mallery flipped back to her normal accent. “Assuming the doc doesn’t actually haul off on someone, I think so,” she said, offering a hand to Leah. “Sorry about your shoes and tights.”

  “We do what we must. Besides, it’s not like I get to keep the clothes when we go home.”

  Mallery winked. “Well, we’re not supposed to.”

  “Oh, really?” Leah said as the pair returned to the dining room.

  They turned the corner and Leah saw all she needed to see.

  Theo and Anna, kissing, arms wrapped around one another. A bling-tastic ring shone from Anna’s left hand. The doctor stood by, fuming.

  Mallery reached out a hand to the Doc’s shoulder, conciliatory. “I’m sorry, hon. It’s like we said.”

  The doctor looked over her shoulder, started a snarl, then gave up. Sniffing back a tear, she made a beeline for the door, snatching her coat from the co
at rack on the way out.

  Leah crossed her arms. “Now I kind of feel bad. She was a controlling witch, but…”

  Mallery nodded. “She wasn’t evil. Just not the One. I changed my mind. She should look up the Brooklyn conceptual artist. Like you said. Study in opposites.”

  “Wrap it up,” King said through the comms.

  Mallery paused for a second. “Roger that. They’re kissing, and she’s wearing the engagement ring. I think we’re clear here. I’m going to do an exit formula, and then let’s head back to the condo and wait for the all-clear.”

  “Roger that,” Shirin said.

  Mallery headed for the hostess. “I’ll get the bill; you see if you can catch Anna’s attention to wave goodbye.”

  Mallery set off toward the hostess’s stand, hips swaying, every bit the perfect social manipulator.

  Leah took her eyes off of Mallery and walked up to Anna and Theo, who had come up for breath.

  “We’ll leave you two,” Leah said. “I assume you’ve got some catching-up to do?”

  Their goofy smiles told her all she needed to know.

  Anna gave Leah a big happy sobby hug. “Thank you, thank you both. I wouldn’t have come inside if not for you.”

  Theo extended a hand. “Thank you.”

  “It’s our pleasure. Susan fancies herself something of a matchmaker.”

  “Susan” returned and they had another round of hugs, Theo looking on, half-dazed with surprise and joy.

  Mallery squeezed Anna’s hand. “You have my card. Don’t hesitate to email. Anytime.”

  Leah added, “She’s not great at answering the phone.”

  “Guilty as charged. Take care, you two. And so nice to meet you, Theo.”

  Another few minutes of circling a conversational ender, Anna and Theo never out of physical contact for more than a few seconds, Mallery and Leah left the restaurant and high-fived outside.

  And all around them, the world exploded into pheremone bombs and mete-cutes.

  Two storefronts down, a pair of Latinas kissed beneath a lawn umbrella.

  A Native American man in a suit ran down the street, tie loosened, stopping in front of a Black man in a tux. They melted together into a joyful embrace.

  Doctor Thorsson walked down the street, despondent, then bumped right into a tired-looking but gorgeous white man in scrubs looking at his phone. They picked themselves up together, and when their eyes met, Leah could swear she heard fireworks.

  In the restaurant above, an Eastern European man in a blazer knelt beside his table, holding a ring out to a Middle-Eastern man, who started crying tears of joy.

  Across the street, two white men and a Korean woman, each following an Airedale terrier, each with their nose buried in a book, crossed paths. Their dogs circled and barked themselves into a knot, entangling their owners as well. As they got the dogs in order, their hands touched for a moment, electricity passing between each, first in one pair, then another, then all three watched one another with starry eyes.

  All around, the world exploded into Rom-Com moments, like it’d been bottling it up for a week and was now bubbling over everywhere.

  A car passed Leah and Mallery, Just Married scribbled on the back windshield.

  Mallery sidestepped to the curb, getting ready to hail a cab. “I think we can call that the all clear.”

  “Can I try this time?” Leah asked.

  “Of course.”

  Leah stepped up to the curb, brought a hand up, whistled, then waved her hand.

  Not three seconds later, a cab turned the corner and rolled right up.

  “I could get used to this,” Leah said as they climbed into the cab.

  Epilogue: An Extended Denouement

  The five Genrenauts raised glasses with amber liquor, shot-glass pours from King’s victory flask.

  “To another successful mission.” King raised a toast around the condo’s dinner table. They’d all changed into their fancy clothing to celebrate.

  Leah decided to sip her drink this time. Roman and Mallery slammed theirs, movements synced with the air of ritual.

  “If HQ has given the all clear, why not head home tonight?” Leah asked.

  King shrugged. “Dimensional disturbance. Preeti says the storm will have passed by morning.”

  “Well, that’s convenient for us. Another night in the big city!”

  “Another night here, at least,” Shirin said. “With the mission done, we don’t have any need to leave the condo.” She leveled a look at Mallery. “Don’t want to cause any more ripples than we have by running roughshod over the city for the last few days.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about. It was all for the mission,” Mallery said.

  Leah asked, “Do missions on story worlds that match up with Earth Prime’s time frame usually involve this much felony wiretapping and cybercrime?”

  Roman nodded. Mallery shrugged.

  Shirin answered, “Not always. We use whatever tools are available to fix the breaches. Chances are, no one will ever know we did all of this.”

  Mallery winked. “I’m very good at covering my tracks.”

  “Which for a chatterbox is quite impressive,” Shirin said.

  “It helps that my approach in ‘covering my trail’ is actually to DDoS every system I’ve touched by dumping terabytes of Lorem Ipsum on them.”

  “Really?” Leah asked. She saw Mallery’s look and knew the answer. No, not really.

  A thought struck Mallery, and she set her drink down. “Before everyone gets too trashed, we need to put the place back in order for the next mission. Reset tasks are in your inboxes.”

  They finished their drinks and set about the packing. The schedule from King said they would be out of the condo at six AM, which was cruel, though Leah knew she could expect the chance to sleep all day once they got back.

  This Genrenaut thing was wreaking havoc on her sleep schedule.

  The last task on her prep list was to sort out the wardrobes with Mallery. The mission leader stood out on the balcony, loose robe rippling in the wind, a glass of wine in one hand.

  “You did well, newbie,” she said as Leah closed the door behind her.

  “Thanks. Privacy concerns aside, this was really fun.”

  “Living the high life on the job certainly never hurts.”

  “No, it really doesn’t. Is it like this on other worlds—Action, Thriller, Crime?”

  “Action sometimes, not as much with the others.” Mallery continued looking out at the city.

  “Are you okay?”

  Mallery turned. “It’s fine. I just have the silly problem where I miss a place before I leave it.”

  Leah walked over to join Mallery on the balcony. The moon illuminated the city in grayscale, assisted by the thousands of lights atop buildings, in the park, and beyond. Central Park West buildings faced her on one side, and the skyscrapers and office buildings in Midtown loomed to her left. To her right, the city sloped down from giant scale into Harlem and beyond.

  “It really is pretty magical.”

  “You’ll do marvelously in this job, once you get used to the way we do business. Your hands aren’t always clean, your life is never boring, but we’re literally saving worlds and tend to do so while having more fun than any other job that has a claim to such heroics.”

  “So, King won’t be benching or dismissing me now that you’re back in action?”

  “Was that what you were thinking would happen? He’d been considering you for weeks. We need all hands right now. You keep doing the job, and you’ll be fine.”

  One worry down. Zillions to go, she thought.

  “Does it ever get lonely?” Leah asked. “It seems like it’d be hard to keep a relationship going with this job. Shirin can do it, but I don’t know how I could.” Leah studied Mallery, whose gaze was fixed on the park.

  “You get used to it. The team is like a family. Doesn’t leave a lot of time to yourself, though. There’s always anoth
er book to read, film to re-watch, or report to absorb.”

  Leah stepped up beside Mallery, taking the view in for herself. “That why you’re taking the time now with this?” She waved to the city.

  “How could I not?” Mallery took a big breath of night air. “The most romantic city in any world, glittering on a chilly night. The perfect time to curl up with someone.”

  “Are you offering?” The words came out before Leah could even know what she was saying. She hadn’t even been thinking it.

  Leah’s breath quickened and time slowed as Mallery processed what had been said.

  Mallery leaned over and kissed Leah on the cheek, then took a half-step back. “Let’s try this conversation again when we’re back on Earth Prime and don’t have the universe pushing on us.”

  “Yeah. That’s. Uh. Probably for the best.”

  Office romances were one thing when you worked for an insurance company. When you spent sixty-plus hours a week together and had to be counted on to save one another’s lives in alternate dimensions, it was entirely different and wow, remember how great of a kisser she was and is that cinnamon? Leah thought.

  “I don’t know what came over me,” Leah said. “We were talking, and it just came out.”

  “The rules of the story world don’t just apply to the folks who were born here. Part of the reasons why we don’t stay on-world too long at any one go.”

  Leah walked back into the bedroom. “We should get to packing. Or I, yeah, I can pack.”

  “It’s okay. Nothing to be embarrassed about. Try to get some rest when you’re done. You did good work here. It’s been fun.”

  Mallery nodded, tying her robe closed and crossing to leave the room.

  After the door shut, Leah stopped and just breathed for a minute, getting her composure back. When that didn’t happen, she got to work anyway as all the feelings came rushing back again—embarrassment and excitement and affection and uncertainty. Ten minutes of mental chatter and thinking in circles later, she had the bags packed. She assumed Mallery’s position on the balcony, looking out on the city and trying to focus on the parts that made sense, the things that worked.

  They’d succeeded in their mission. She’d learned about another world, the technology they used to find breaches and speculate how to fix them. She’d found, diagnosed, and patched a story breach all on her own.