Half a Cowboy

by Andrew Grey

  “I thought you didn’t want to hear about any gay stuff,” Ashton said softly, since Ben was asleep on the sofa, surrounded by half the pups, with the others on the floor nearby.

  Reg half snorted. “That’s not gay stuff, it’s heart stuff. The gay stuff is… well… anything else.” He left and closed the front door behind him.

  Ashton sighed and settled back in his chair. He was damned lucky in a lot of ways. Of course, he’d be even luckier if the man sleeping on his sofa—with a body Ashton wanted the chance to get to know much better—decided to move into Ashton’s bed. But that was strictly wishful thinking.

  Ben moved his legs, and the dogs shifted. Then he did it again, and two of them jumped down when Ben began kicking in earnest. He bolted upright, gasping and looking around. “Oh God, sorry, I….”

  “It’s okay. There are times when I do that too.” Ashton didn’t want to talk about his dreams. He’d found out long ago that talking about them didn’t help, especially the ones filled with bodies and rivers of death. Ashton still had the nightmares, but he’d kept them to himself since he’d discovered he tended to disturb the people he told about them. “It was only a dream. You’re as safe as you can be.” He slowly got up and shifted over to perch on the edge of the sofa. “You can talk about it if you want.” Ashton gently rubbed Ben’s arm to soothe him. There had been many times when he’d wished someone had been there to help him understand that he would be okay. Mostly he had endured the aftereffects of what he’d seen alone.

  “Do they go away?” Ben asked.

  Ashton shrugged. “I wish to hell I knew. Sometimes they come less frequently, and over time, for me, the intensity has decreased. Some people say they never stop. But I keep telling myself that they are just dreams.” He picked up Celeste, a terrier mix, and placed her next to Ben. “These guys help a lot. They don’t care about what we’ve seen and done, and they give unconditional love and acceptance.” Many times the dogs had been his only link to reality and the hope that things would indeed get better.

  Ben held Celeste, stroking her back, his gaze lingering on Ashton. Ben swallowed, and Ashton watched his throat work, that little bump rising and falling. Damn it all, he wished he knew what Ben wanted. And then he told himself, fuck it.

  Ashton leaned closer, sliding his hand around the back of Ben’s neck. He didn’t want to press and was prepared to stop if Ben resisted, but he came right along with him, drawing nearer. Celeste jumped down, and Ashton barely registered the movement. Ben’s breath caressed Ashton’s lips, and their gazes met in a blaze of banked heat that flared to life as soon as their lips touched.

  Ben parted his lips, and Ashton drew closer, pressing deeper, pushing Ben back into the cushions. The kisses grew more and more heated, until Ashton had to pull back or risk being carried away past the point of no return.

  He swallowed hard, watching Ben’s tongue glide over his just-kissed lips. Ben’s savory sweetness was still on Ashton’s, and he ran his tongue over them just to get the last lingering taste of Ben from them. God, he was so screwed. Ashton had known Ben a matter of a few days and already he had wishes and longings he knew were a terrible idea. He needed to put some distance between them or else he was going to find himself on a fast horse heading where he shouldn’t be going.

  “I think I’m going to go to bed.” He straightened up, inhaling deeply, desperate to clear the Ben-induced fog that had settled over his mind.

  “Oh,” Ben whispered as he sat up, untangling his legs from the blankets. “Umm….”

  “Look, I’m sorry. I got a little carried away.” Ashton tried to get to his feet, but his leg seemed weak, and he couldn’t move as quickly as he wanted to.

  “Don’t you dare,” Ben snapped, his eyes suddenly ablaze with something other than passion. Then he pressed forward, capturing Ashton’s lips in a kiss of his own before backing away. “You don’t get to play games with me. No one does anymore. If you want to keep kissing me, then you better fucking do it.” His gaze challenged Ashton to argue with him. “Either you wanted that kiss or you didn’t. None of this ‘I’m sorry’ shit, okay?”

  Ashton smiled. “Okay. I wanted it. I have since I found you sleeping in the damned barn. Is that what you want me to say?”

  “As long as it’s honest,” Ben said. He held Ashton’s gaze.

  “I wanted it,” he said. “But maybe I shouldn’t.” This was most likely one of the best worst ideas he had ever had, but still, he drew Ben into another kiss, wrapping him in his arms, holding him tight as their tongues dueled. Damn, he wanted to hold him and never let him go.

  “See, this is the gay stuff I was talking about,” Reg said from behind him.

  “It’s a gay house. Get used to it,” Ashton quipped as he straightened up and then got his legs where they needed to be before slowly standing. “Did you find anything?”

  “Well, I’m not sure. There were some trails in the snow, but they weren’t fresh. I was going to get some coffee and head over to the other area of the ranch to check over there.”

  “Thermoses are in the right upper cabinet, lower shelf. Call right away if you see anything,” Ashton told him. Reg promised he would before getting his coffee and leaving.

  “Is he going out in that cold? Like, willingly?”

  Ashton nodded. “Reg is one of those guys who don’t feel the cold, the heat, or much of anything really, when he’s on an assignment. It’s all about the job with him. That’s why I went into the security business with him. Reg is one of the most dedicated and loyal friends I have. There are few people other than him and the men on this ranch that I would trust my safety to.” He reached for his cane, which was resting next to the arm of his chair, leaning on it more heavily than he would have liked. “I’m going to go in to bed. Reg will call if he finds anything.”

  “Okay,” Ben agreed.

  Ashton turned off the lights, and Ben followed him down the hallway. He went into his bedroom and heard Ben in the bathroom.

  Ashton sat on the edge of the bed, pulled off his shoes and socks, and wriggled his toes. Then he slipped out of his pants, ignoring the lines and scars on his skin. He reached into the nightstand and retrieved a scar cream, which he rubbed in to help keep the skin supple.

  Ashton got up and went into his bathroom to clean up before returning to the bedroom. He was used to having company in bed. With six dogs, they were often jostling for who would sleep with him. What he didn’t expect to find was a man curled under the covers, peering up at him from his blankets.

  Ben lifted the blankets without saying a word, and Ashton slipped off the rest of his clothes, turned out the last of the lights, and climbed into bed.

  “This is certainly unexpected,” Ashton breathed.

  Ben rolled over. “You can’t tell me that you built a company and manage this ranch without knowing what you want. Well, I learned that I need to go after what I want as well.” He slid right against him, pressing Ashton onto his back. He went willingly as the wire of energy that was Ben came alive in his arms. Damn, it was hot, and when Ben kissed him, he threw everything into it.

  There was no holding back, and Ashton loved that. The few guys he had dated all seemed tentative. Maybe they wanted him to take the lead and be the strong one, but Ben didn’t need that. He went for it, leading Ashton down a path of intense passion. Ben was hot, beautiful, lanky muscles long and sleek, his skin smooth.

  The past few nights, whenever he’d imagined this, Ashton had expected that Ben would be tentative, especially after the things he had told Ashton about. But Ben was just the opposite: intense, forward, taking what he wanted in a way that only heightened the attraction. Ashton had always loved strong men, and Ben was turning out to be among the strongest of all. “Is this how you always are?”

  Ben paused. “You don’t like me like this?”

  Ashton smiled, peering deeply into his eyes. “I adore you like this.”

  Ben stilled. “I was never this way… with… you-know-who. He
wanted to be in charge of everything, and I let him. I won’t go back to that.”

  “I don’t want you to. You should be who you are, in bed and outside of it. That’s the person I’m interested in.” Ashton smoothed Ben’s hair out of his eyes and drew him closer and down into a kiss. He tightened his arms around Ben, holding him, their heat combining in the otherwise cool room to create a bubble around them that Ashton hoped never broke.

  “Are you sure this is okay?”

  Ashton sighed. “I haven’t been with anyone since I hurt my leg. Sometimes things are difficult and I can’t get my leg to do what I want it to.”

  “How about you lie back and let me take care of it.” Ben slid down his body. “Just lie still and put yourself in my hands.” He reached over to the bedside table for supplies, and then his warm hands stroked Ashton’s thigh.

  “Oh God,” Ashton sighed as the tension and ache of the day leached out of his leg under the ministration of hands that Ashton was starting to think were magic. “That’s—”

  “I know. You carry all your tension in this leg right now. You probably used to hold it in your neck or shoulders, but with the injury, the strain shifted there.” He smoothed his hand up and down the skin, and Ashton clenched his teeth as tension built and then released, the muscles relaxing. Some days his leg never stopped aching, especially in the winter. This was absolute heaven. “How did you hurt it? Was it when you were in the Army?”

  Ashton shook his head. “You’d think so, but it happened a little over two years ago, after we started the security company. Reg and I both worked a ton of hours, and we were contracted by a prominent woman who had picked up a stalker. We caught him, and in the process of apprehension, the fucker—” Ashton hissed and then sighed as the muscles relaxed under Ben’s hands. “—hit me with his car, running over my foot and leg. Then he backed up for good measure, making sure to grind the bones.” And he screwed up the muscles something awful. It was so dumb. Ashton made it through hell in the Army only to get permanently injured by a stupid stalker. He groaned as the last of the pain eased from his leg. “How did you learn to do that?”

  Ben sighed softly. “I was in school for a while. I thought of being a nurse but shifted to massage therapy. It was something else Dallas took away.”

  Ashton’s phone chimed three times in rapid succession, and he reached for it with a groan.

  We have visitors and I need you now! Come fast! Reg’s message read.

  “Reg says there’s trouble. He needs help.” Ashton sat up, and Ben jumped off the bed and started pulling on his clothes. Ashton texted Lucy and Marcel and got an immediate response that they were on their way. “Thank you for this.” Maybe he’d be able to make it through this latest crisis without too much pain, and hopefully he and Ben could pick up where they left off.

  ASHTON PULLED in to a hive of activity, with Reg’s and Marcel’s trucks blocking the driveway and a trailer up near the barn.

  “What the fuck is this?” Ashton got out of the truck.

  Ben came around to his side and took his arm. “It’s slick as hell and I don’t want you to fall,” Ben said as raised voices split the cold night air.

  “You’re not going anywhere,” Reg boomed as Ashton approached. “Horse thieves can still be shot.” Damn, that tone took Ashton back to one of their first security jobs protecting the teenage son of a Hollywood producer. Only that time, the words had been leveled at their young client after he’d decided to take a joyride through LA in his father’s Rolls.

  “But we have authorization,” a man said as Ashton approached. It took a few seconds before he recognized Gary Meyers hanging in the shadows.

  “What is this?” Ashton demanded. “Gary, what the hell are you doing here at this time of night with a trailer?”

  “It was reported on our tip line that your horses were emaciated and not being fed properly, so we came to remove them to a proper location.” He sneered.

  Ashton shook his head. “You can plainly see that there is nothing wrong with any of the animals on this ranch. Whoever told you that was full of shit. You aren’t taking anything anywhere.” He snatched the paper from Gary’s hand, read it over, and handed it back. “It says you have the right to verify, nothing more.” He stepped closer. “You little shit. I took care of you in high school and I’ll do the same thing now.” Ashton turned to Ben. “Dial 911, ask for the sheriff, and report that we have caught thieves attempting to steal our horses. Let’s see how Gary likes spending the rest of the night in jail for exceeding his authority.” He turned to Reg. “Awesome job.”

  Reg nodded, and Ashton loved the granite-hard expression he directed Gary’s way.

  “The sheriff is on his way.” Ben handed Ashton back his phone.

  “Great.” Ashton went over to the barn door. “Did this idiot get inside?”

  Reg shook his head. “I must have gotten here just after he arrived. I called the guys, and we blocked him in and called you.”

  Ashton checked that the horses were all okay, with huge sets of eyes watching like he was crazy to be there while they were trying to sleep. They had water and hay, and he patted noses and then left the barn, closing the door behind him.

  “I get to verify that the horses aren’t being mistreated,” Gary protested, his chest puffing.

  “Not until the sheriff gets here. Then you can look before the sheriff takes you into custody. I’m going to press charges, so you’d better start thinking about how you’re going to weasel your way out of this.” Gary clearly thought being the county AG agent gave him permission to act like the livestock and agriculture police.

  The stricken expression on Gary’s features was worth the late-night aggravation.

  “What’s with this guy?” Ben asked.

  Ashton turned away to speak to him privately. “He and I went to high school together. Gary was the kind of guy most of the kids hated. His dad had a huge ranch on the other side of town, and he always thought that made him better than everyone else.” He leaned closer. “Gary had new cars and plenty of money… until his dad drank away everything. The ranch didn’t survive, but Gary still wants to believe that the sun rises and sets on his lily-white, flat, uninteresting ass.”

  “I see.”

  Flashing lights appeared in the distance and the sheriff pulled into the driveway in his mammoth SUV and parked near the trucks.

  “What mess have you gotten yourself in for this time?” Sheriff Holmes asked Gary.

  “I needed to check the horses,” he said feebly, handing him the paper.

  Holmes looked at it and handed it back. “You sure as hell don’t have to do it at eleven at night, and you certainly don’t need a horse trailer.” He was pissed as hell, probably because he’d been at home in bed and had been called out into this cold mess.

  “He can go ahead and check the horses… and then I’m pressing charges for attempted robbery. He fully intended to take my horses regardless of what he was authorized to do.” Ashton crossed his arms over his chest and winked at Ben, who smiled back. “I’m tired of his shit. Let him cool off behind bars until Cheryl comes to bail his ass out.”

  “He can’t do that—” Gary protested.

  “Actually, he can. You brought a bulldozer to do a shovelful of work at nearly midnight. I’d say that’s suspicious enough. Now let’s look at those horses, and then we can get you tucked into a nice, warm jail cell.”

  Ben snickered. “The sheriff is enjoying this, isn’t he?” he whispered. “How much longer do we need to be here? I’d like to get back to what we were doing.”

  And just like that, Ashton could hardly wait to get the hell out of there.

  “How about he checks the horses, gets his ass out of here, and writes a letter of apology to me, as well as to you for getting you out here at this time of night? Maybe you could put it up on the wall of your office for everyone to see?” Ashton asked Sheriff Holmes, who smiled. “Then we can all go home.”

  The sheriff turned to Gary,
who seemed less likely to faint by the second. “I also want to know the basis of this complaint. Ashton treats his horses like a part of his family, and the whole town knows it.” He stepped out of the way. “Gary, get on with your checking. Then you have one day to write two appropriately apologetic letters where you eat a ton of crow. And when we get back to town, you’ll tell me all about this anonymous tip, or I’ll take you in while your wife and kids watch.” The sheriff was obviously pissed.

  Gary turned ghostly white, then stomped off with him toward the barn. A few minutes later he came out, mumbling under his breath because everything was just as it should be.

  APPARENTLY THE sheriff thought that was enough for now, and Ashton watched Gary get into his truck. He motioned to the guys to move the vehicles, and Gary turned out of the barnyard.

  “What do you think that was about?” Reg asked from behind him. “That guy is squirrely as all hell.”

  “Always was.” Ashton turned to Ben, wondering if he might have some insight. “It was probably Henderson just causing trouble, but… do you think Dallas might have had something to do with it?” He figured it was best to cover all the bases.

  Ben shrugged. “I doubt it. Dallas is more likely to take care of things in a more hands-on way. I don’t really see him making this kind of nuisance phone call. It’s not his style at all.” He relaxed a little and moved into Ashton’s personal space. “Come on. Let’s get you back to the house. I can tell that all of my hard work has been undone.”

  “We got this,” Lucy told him.

  Ashton got into his truck, letting his guys do their work. Then he drove back to the house with Ben, his leg throbbing the whole time. He was used to dealing with the cold winters in Wyoming, but they did a number on the muscles in his leg.

  “Should I make some tea?” Ashton asked once they were inside.

  “Not for me,” Ben said softly, his voice filling with doubt as he shifted his weight from foot to foot. “Look, I need to go to bed, and so do you. If you aren’t up for anything, that’s fine. I know you’re tired. Go ahead and make your tea. I’ll see you in the morning.”