Half a Cowboy

by Andrew Grey

  All Ben heard was laughter, soft as it reached his ears but menacing as hell. He came closer. “You think I care?” the voice said. “I will be in and out before any of you have a chance to breathe… which you won’t be doing for much longer. Put Benji on the line… now.”

  “No,” Ashton answered as Ben extended his hand. He met Ashton’s gaze, then slowly took the receiver from him.

  “Just leave me alone.”

  “You know my voice, kid, and you know what I’m capable of,” the man on the phone said. Ben really didn’t recognize him. He searched his memory but came up empty. “Your little friend, the one who helped you? Well let’s just say that no one should ever help you. Don’t know why, but Dallas wants your sorry ass back, and I’m going to deliver it. But kid, you gotta realize, you know too much for him to let you get away. So you’d better have your little bags packed and be ready to go when I get there, or so help me, I will make sure that anyone near you pays. Got it?”

  Ben swallowed hard even as he nodded, ice running through his veins. All the hopes that had begun to bud and take hold suddenly withered and died. He wasn’t going to be able to get away from these people. And if he stayed, Ashton, Marcel, and Lucy, as well as all the others, were going to be in danger.

  Ben extended his hand and hung up the phone.

  “We shouldn’t have let him talk,” Reg said.

  “No,” Ben countered. “You can’t shield me from the shit that I got myself into.” What he hadn’t understood until right now was that he had been doomed from the start. As soon as he’d taken help from Dallas, he was doomed. And there wasn’t a damned thing he could do about it now.

  Chapter 8

  ASHTON KNEW the phone call had had an effect on Ben. How could it not?

  “I’m fine,” Ben told them after he had hung up and reported what had been said. Ashton and Reg had asked him a lot of questions, but Ben didn’t seem to have many answers. “Dallas seems to think I know a lot of stuff about him,” Ben said. “At least, that’s what I got from that guy. It isn’t necessarily true, though.”

  “But you did know some things,” Reg argued. “And I bet you know more.” He smiled, and then Reg and Ben talked quietly about how long Ben had been with Dallas. “He doesn’t know what you know and what you don’t. That’s what has him afraid.”

  Ben swallowed and nodded, but Ashton wasn’t sure if Ben had even heard Reg. He was quiet for much of the rest of the day, sitting on the sofa with the dogs curled around him, seeming to watch television. At dinner he said very little, only smiling at Ashton when he nudged him or specifically got his attention. He didn’t eat much, and he jumped at every noise. Ashton wondered just how he was going to bring this to an end.

  “I made a few calls, and we can bring some more resources to the ranch,” Reg offered.

  “For how long?” Ashton asked. “Days, weeks, months, the rest of our lives?” This situation was getting to him as well, and he hated that. His training told him to assess the situation, then come up with a plan of action. But he couldn’t seem to do that.

  “Dude,” Reg said. “You need to think about this the way we used to when we had a case to solve. Take stock of what you know, then fill in the gaps in the picture.”

  “Yeah, but there’s a lot we don’t know.”

  Reg nodded. “But we can assume that someone is on their way here and they have their sights set on Ben.” He drew closer. “And we know that if Dallas gets his hands on Ben, you are most likely never going to see him again.” His gaze shifted toward the door to the living room where Ben was. “Is that what you want to happen?”

  “No way in hell,” Ashton swore.

  “Then we have to figure some things out. First of all, we need really good defenses.” Reg crossed his arms over his chest. “The cameras show us what’s going on, but they aren’t going to stop this asshole from setting fire to one of the barns to draw you out, or from shooting the horses to get your attention.”

  Ashton swallowed hard. That had been in the back of his mind, but he hadn’t wanted to think about it.

  “They could go after the cattle as well,” Reg added. “But if you want my honest opinion, these people are strangers. They aren’t going to know that the far barn is yours. My guess is that they are going to stay with what’s close to the house. I’m going to station one of the men in the barn, and I would suggest that you get Marcel and Lucy up here in the house. Concentrate your assets. If they want Ben, they’ll have to go through the lot of us to get to him.”

  “I agree. From what Ben said, this person will assume that he can just walk up here and get what he wants. But he’s going to get a surprise.”

  Reg’s phone rang, and he turned away to answer it, speaking quietly.

  Ashton wandered through the house and made a few calls of his own. He spoke with Marcel, who said that Lucy was doing a lot better and was going stir-crazy being stuck inside.

  “I’ll bring the guns,” Marcel added just before he hung up. They agreed to come stay at the main house for a few days. Like Reg had said, they’d concentrate their power into a show of strength. If this was going to become an old-fashioned western gun fight, then Ashton was going to use every advantage he had. And being on home turf was one of them.

  After hanging up, he gathered the weapons he had and made sure they were locked and loaded. Ben was still on the sofa in the living room, surrounded by the dogs, who seemed to know that he needed them. Ben absently went from head to head, gently stroking each dog between the ears, and they sat there, lapping up his attention. Ashton knew just how they felt. Lord knows he’d had those hands on his skin, and he longed for the next time Ben touched him.

  “Are you watching this?” Ashton asked, tilting his head toward the TV as he sank into his chair to put his feet up.

  “Not really,” Ben answered. “I keep trying to put a face with the voice on the phone, and I can’t seem to do it. I have heard the voice before, I’m sure of it, and I know if I can put a name to it, that would help you all know who is coming. I could tell the sheriff too, so he’d know who he was looking for. Instead I’ve got nothing.”

  “Hey, give yourself a break. First, why don’t you take a deep breath. Okay? Now, in your mind, go over the people you’ve met at Dallas’s house or at the club, one by one. Think of each place and see if the voice belongs there.” It was the best advice that he had. “If that doesn’t work, then let it go for a while. If you’ve heard the voice before, it will come to you.” Sometimes, the harder a person tried to remember something, the farther out of reach it became.

  He turned to where Guy sat at the kitchen table behind his computer, watching the screen. “Is everything quiet?”

  Guy lifted his gaze. “Yes. I’ve set up alarms that will alert us if there is any movement, and they will highlight it on the screen. I figured if we get alerted to a few passing animals, that was better than missing a man approaching.”

  “Good work,” Ashton agreed and turned his attention to the television.

  “There’s a truck coming up the drive. I think it’s Marcel,” Guy said and hurried to the window. “Yes.” He opened the door and let Marcel and Lucy inside as the dogs barked, excited for some attention. But once Marcel and Lucy were inside, they returned to be with Ben.

  “Take the second room down the hall. I think that one is free at the moment. I’m sorry for the inconvenience, but it’s best for all of us to stay together until this is over.” Ashton wanted everyone safe, and that meant these two as well.

  “What’s happened?” Lucy asked as he sat down, his leg straight out.

  “Dallas and one of his goons have issued threats,” Ben supplied. “I wish they would all curl up and die on the crap heap of life where they belong.” He got up and left the room, heading down the hallway.

  Ashton heard the door close, and he thought about going after him, but Reg shook his head.

  “Let him have some time on his own,” Reg offered. “He’s been rocked pretty
badly, and he probably needs a chance to process it all. Give him a little while and then go see him.”

  Ashton stayed seated, but he didn’t want to. Ben was hurting, and Ashton wanted to make him feel better. But Reg was probably right. This was something he couldn’t do. Ben needed to come to terms with the situation on his own, and he was strong enough to do that. After all, he had tried to escape once, failed, and then done it again. That took courage and determination. He didn’t need Ashton to prop him up and protect him. He wasn’t a child. Still, Ashton’s heart ached that Ben was hurting.

  He sat there quietly, watching reruns on television while the others monitored the perimeter. Marcel and Lucy joined him, and the three of them went over plans for the herd and the things they wanted to do come spring. It was probably a little early, but they needed something to do. The tension in the room kept rising, and Ashton hoped something would happen soon so they could put an end to this. But he also hoped it stayed quiet. Either way, it sucked.

  “You want to enlarge the herd?” Lucy asked.

  “Yeah, if we can. I heard that the Marsden ranch may be coming up for sale, and it’s close enough that we could rent out the house and use the land to run more cattle. We’ve been doing very well, and I have some ideas about direct selling our beef. That way we can get closer to full retail for it instead of just the wholesale price.”

  Lucy nodded and Marcel smiled. “I like it.” Marcel sat back, and Ashton once again turned toward the hall. “Go on and see to him,” Marcel whispered.

  Ashton nodded and got up. “Call me if you see anything at all,” he told Guy before heading down the hall and pushing open the bedroom door.

  Ben lay on his back on the bed. The dogs hurried over, jumping on the bed to join him. “Hey, guys.”

  “They know you’re upset,” Ashton said, sitting on the edge of the bed. “I’m sorry this is so hard.”

  “It sucks. No one should have to go through shit like this just because they want to live their own life. God damn all psychotic assholes who think they have the right to ruin someone else’s life. That’s what he’s doing.” Ben stiffened and sighed, breathing deeply.

  “Do you want company, or would you rather be alone?” Ashton asked, getting back up.

  But Ben stopped him. “I don’t know what I want, except that I need to have a life of my own. Is that too much to ask?”

  Ashton leaned over the bed, touching Ben’s chin. “No. It’s not too much. And I dare say that’s part of why you’re here. I want the same thing.” He looked down at his leg. “I want to be like I was before the injury.” He leaned closer. “Hopefully one of us will get what they truly want.” Ashton, though, was well aware that what he wanted was beyond his reach.

  “I’m sorry for being a self-centered jerk,” Ben said.

  Ashton laughed. “Don’t be. That’s something that comes with being human… and a guy, I suspect. I’ve never met a man in my life who wasn’t one at some point or other.” He smirked.

  “How is your leg?” Ben asked.

  Ashton shrugged. It was no better or worse than usual.

  Ben turned toward the clock on the bedside table. “Why don’t you get ready for bed and I’ll massage your leg before you go to sleep. Hopefully then you’ll be able to get some rest.”

  Ashton agreed and went into the bathroom, cleaned up, and returned to the bedroom before undressing and slipping under the covers. He lay in his boxers on his stomach, waiting for Ben’s gifted fingers to work their magic.

  Ben must have left, and Ashton closed his eyes, waiting for Ben to join him. Still, he jumped a little when Ben’s warm hands touched his skin.

  “What have the doctors told you about your leg? Will it get better with therapy?” Ben whispered as his magic fingers worked over his wounded muscles.

  Ashton tensed and stifled a hiss before sighing as some of the ache and tension eased. “There are some experimental treatments that the doctors have said show promise—stem cell therapies and maybe tissue transplants. But they cost a fortune, and insurance isn’t going to pay for them.” He took a deep breath and held it in anticipation of momentary discomfort, which didn’t materialize. Ashton sighed and relaxed completely, trusting himself to Ben’s hands.

  “I’m sorry. I….” Ben quieted as his hands came to a stop, resting on Ashton’s calf.

  “Pity is something I don’t need,” he said without heat. “I wallowed in it enough on my own. Sometimes shit happens, and we have to make the best of it.” Ashton’s words shifted to a groan and then a sigh as Ben started again. “Oh God, that’s so good.”

  “I’m glad I can help.” Ben’s hands paused once again, and Ashton felt Ben’s weight shift on the bed. Then Ben’s warm lips pressed to his shoulder blade in a gentle kiss that heated his skin. “Just relax,” Ben whispered and straightened up.

  Ashton closed his eyes as Ben continued his incredible ministrations until he floated on a cloud of relaxation and comfort, and sleep eventually took over. He felt Ben tuck the covers around him, but kept his eyes closed. Then, still half asleep, he rolled over and pulled Ben to him, welcoming a few pain-free hours.

  COLD SURROUNDED him, and then it was gone. Ashton burrowed deeper under the covers, listening with his half-awake mind to determine if something was wrong. The room was quiet, and no one seemed to be raising an alarm. He stretched his arm out and came up empty. The bed and room were empty except for him.

  “Ben?” Ashton said into the darkness, pushing away the covers and standing in the cool air. He reached for his clothes and pulled open the door the rest of the way.

  “There’s no need for this,” he heard Reg say.

  “I can go and call Dallas from somewhere else. You all will be safe. He isn’t going to stop. Dallas never does,” Ben pleaded.

  Ashton leaned on the wall, not moving.

  “And what about Ashton? Was that just some put-up job so he’d help you?” Reg actually growled a little. “He deserves better than that, and you know it.”

  “I’m doing this for him and everyone here. If I go, the threat will go along with me,” Ben said forcefully. “It’s the only way I know of to make this go away. Everyone here will be able to go back to their lives, and I won’t have to worry about Ashton getting hurt.” The hitch in Ben’s voice was almost enough to propel him forward.

  “I’m sure Ashton has told you this, but I will as well. Running isn’t the answer. It will only mean that you’ll be looking over your shoulder for the rest of your life. Once this threat is over, you’ll find yourself running from your next problem and the one after that. It’s easy for running to become a habit. And when you look back on your life, you’ll discover that you’re ashamed of yourself for it. Believe me, I know.”

  Ben snorted, and Ashton could see his lips curl up as he stared at Reg in disbelief.

  “You’re not the only one who was scared once… and certainly not the only one who ever ran away,” Reg continued. “I did when I was eighteen. I thought I had all the answers and my parents didn’t understand me. In other words, I was stupid. I know what you’re going through because I fell in with the wrong people too. Living hand to mouth on the street isn’t easy for anyone. We grasp whatever comfort we can get because we have no idea when it’s going to be ripped away from us. I’m well aware of how you felt meeting someone like Dallas, who’s offering you everything you want, can turn to a nightmare. It happened to me too.” Reg paused, and Ashton stayed still. This was a story he had never heard before, a part of his friend’s life that he usually kept closed off. No one wanted to air the parts of themselves that they weren’t proud of.

  “What changed?” Ben asked almost too softly for Ashton to hear.

  “I met someone, an older man.” Reg chuckled. “He ran one of the athletic clubs in the city. A do-gooder, someone with a huge heart who didn’t give up. He showed me that life could be more than what I was living and that I had it in me to be more. It was his suggestion that I get myself out.”


  “Did he help you enlist?” Ben asked.

  “No. That was my decision. But I never would have made it if it hadn’t been for him. He let me know that I had the ability to decide, that I could be who I wanted to be if I used it. I went into the Army a tough street kid who would do anything to survive, and came out a completely different person. No… sorry, that isn’t right. I came out as myself—a better, more confident version of me. Someone I like and can look at in the mirror in the mornings. But what was important was that I made my own decision, just like you have to.”

  “It’s easy for you. You made a decision to make your life better. I just want Ashton to be safe, and he won’t be—none of you will be if I’m around.” Ben didn’t sound quite as convinced as he had a few minutes ago.

  “Nothing is ever easy.” Ashton recognized the tinge of harshness in Reg’s voice. “The thing you aren’t understanding is that Ashton, for you, is like the athletic system director was for me. He’s the one giving you a chance, don’t you see that? You can break free from this guy, but you have to decide to do it—and let others help you. If I hadn’t decided, I’d still be running and just existing today, I know that. Ashton is giving you a chance; we all are. Why don’t you get it? Everyone here is willing to stand up to this asshole—except you.”

  Oh, Ashton could just imagine the stern, carved-from-marble “don’t be an idiot” expression Reg was giving Ben right about now. He had seen it before, and it was damned good.

  “If I were you, I’d think about that hard before you do something you’ll regret.”

  Ashton slowly turned and went back into the bedroom. There was nothing more he could say about the situation. Reg had expressed things so much better than he ever could, and now it was up to Ben. Ashton had thought Ben had already decided, but obviously he’d been mistaken. So it came to this. Would Ben stay and trust that what Ashton was offering him was real? Or would he leave?