Stepbrother

by Stacy McWilliams

  Bailey

  The next morning my mom announced that she was getting married in a few months, just in time for my sixteenth birthday. She sat googling dresses while I made myself a coffee and a bagel and she called her friend Kim.

  I ignored her as I sat sipping on my coffee and wondering how much my life was going to change, now that my mom was to be married. I hated change; I hated the unknown and my anxiety was already heightened because I’d only met Shawn once.

  My mom didn’t care and later that day she dragged me shopping with her, Cate, and Kim for bridesmaid dresses, chatting excitedly about the wedding. I wasn’t able to be excited about it since it would mean meeting new people and changing my life, so I spent my time staring morosely at dresses.

  Cate tried to involve me, but my mom mostly ignored me as she spent her time trying on dress after dress, and Kim tried on the bridesmaid dresses while Cate fed me chocolate and sent me for food to give me a break. I walked around the mall, staring dejectedly into shops when an older boy began following me. He was tall with shaggy brown hair, ice-cold blue eyes, and a sneer that could curdle dairy.

  I rushed back to the Bridal Rooms, and Cate asked me what was wrong. I just shrugged at her and glanced over my shoulder constantly. Eventually, my mom settled on a fishtail cream lace dress. It was stunning and she looked gorgeous. She met my eye in the mirror and I smiled giving her a thumbs-up.

  She’d chosen pale gold for her bridesmaids and made me try on a dress. I’d had a growth spurt recently and I needed to go underwear shopping because my bras were getting a little tight, but the dress fit like a dream, and out of my dark baggy clothes, I could almost pass for pretty. The gold flecks in my blue eyes came out with the color of the dress and my blonde hair curled over my shoulder. The dress also brought out the color of my creamy skin and accentuated my shape, giving me breasts where I had little and sliming my curvaceous waist.

  I walked out and twirled as I reached the platform, giggling at my mom’s awestruck face. She smiled up at me and I glanced around, seeing the shaggy boy from earlier and to my complete horror Cooper, the idiot from the day before who’d tripped me up.

  To the left of both boys stood Shawn, who smiled genially at me, ignoring the boys at his side. Cooper watched me with hatred on every plane on his gorgeous face. His brown hair was the same shade as his dad’s and his eyes the same brown, but they were unusual with flecks of green. I’d noticed that the day before when he’d stared at me from across the room.

  “Bailey, you look stunning. You have to get her that dress,” he said, turning to my mom, and as soon as he’d turned away both boys narrowed their eyes at me.

  Cooper glared at me, then spun away asking the attendant where the bathroom was.

  “Just through there, hon,” she muttered, smiling at him, and he turned walking towards the fitting rooms. He had to pass me as I stood on the footstool letting the girl fiddle around my feet and measure the dress. She pinned up parts and stuck a few pins under my arms and at my back, before she stepped back and paused, taking me in.

  Cooper then passed by me, and whispered into my ear,

  “I have to go vomit!”

  I shivered at his proximity but glanced at him as his figure retreated, and I suddenly felt very self-conscious as I stood in the dress that I’d originally found gorgeous, but was now finding fault in.

  “That’s you now, honey. You’re all done now. You can go get changed. Be careful of the pins though.”

  I nodded slowly at the woman and began walking slowly back to my dressing room. As I reached the doors and pushed them open, Cooper was standing on the other side. His back was to me and he was talking on his cell.

  “Yeah, man, sorry. My dad’s making me stay to meet my new stepsister…”

  He spat the word stepsister with so much venom that I shuddered and brushed past him. His whole body stiffened as I moved by him and he grabbed my arm, making me wince. His touch caused electricity to rush up my arm and when I glanced back at him, he dropped my arm, glaring at me.

  I could feel his stare as I made my way back to the dressing rooms.

  When I got back into the room, I saw to my horror that my bra was missing from my clothes, as was my cell. I checked under the bench that I was sure I’d left them on, scanned the floor, and began to hyperventilate since they were gone.

  My mom would have a fit because I’d only gotten that cell a few weeks previously. I paced around the room and decided to quickly get dressed and go check the car, but I was sure I’d had it on me when we’d come into the mall.

  I dressed as best I could and walked out to meet my mom and everyone else. My arms were wrapped around my chest as I tried to hide the fact, I didn’t have a bra on. I felt exposed and self-conscious and desperate to get home.

  Kim’s gray eyes narrowed in disgust at me as I approached which made me feel even worse. I wished she’d get over it already. Kyle and I had been kids and had fallen out. It was no big deal, but she still hated me. I usually didn’t care, but I was already feeling vulnerable since I was walking about with no bra on and was worrying about my cell.

  Cate smiled at me and pulled me into her arms, giving me a small hug. She didn’t know it, but I desperately needed the hug and as she released me Shawn turned towards me smiling and gesturing to Cooper and the other boy.

  “Sorry for intruding, Henrietta, but I felt it was time the boys and Bailey met.”

  He stepped towards me and my eyes widened in horror as I saw my bra poking out of Cooper’s pocket over his shoulder.

  “Bailey, this is Zane, my eldest son, and this is Cooper, who’s just a year older than you.” His tone when he spoke of Zane was completely different from the pride in his voice when he spoke of Cooper. I nodded politely at both of them. Zane looked a few years older than us and as I gave him a once-over, he seemed completely disinterested in me.

  Zane was gorgeous, with smokey green eyes, his father’s tall build, and the same copper-colored brown hair as his father and brother. He had eyelashes to die for but dressed in loose black clothes, he was anything but sexy, although somehow, he pulled it off. His hair was buzz cut, and he had a hoop earring in one ear.

  My mom prodded me hard in the side, so I stretched my hand out and shook Zane’s hand, followed by Cooper’s. He shook it for a second, but kept the mask of indifference on his face, squeezing too hard as my mom turned to his father.

  “I’m so glad you came today. It’s so lovely to have everyone together.” Her voice was light and eager, but as she spoke Zane rolled his eyes with obvious disdain. He was clearly as thrilled about our parents hooking up as I was. Shawn spoke up, breaking Cooper’s death stare at me.

  “Let’s all go for dinner.” I groaned internally and rolled my eyes. Zane turned to his father and spoke in a bored tone.

  “Sorry, Dad, I gotta bounce. Have fun though.” He turned and left without waiting to be dismissed. We all left the dress shop and the adults walked just ahead of Cooper and me. As Cooper walked beside me, pushing me into everything and everyone he could. We walked by Pete and his gang of sycophants and they all catcalled and made pig noises.

  Cooper had stopped shoving me and when I glanced at my side he was gone. I looked ahead and saw him walking faster, catching up with his dad and my mom. The thought left me bereft. I was alone, truly alone because my mom didn’t even look back to check if I was okay. She’d been so cold to me since Louis had died, but it was getting worse as I got older.

  Dinner was the most unpleasant evening I’d had in a long time, and I was desperate for it to be over. Cooper left before his dad, and my mom left last. I’d spent the whole time envisioning how to murder someone and get away with it. To say I hated Cooper was an understatement and I had hardly touched a bite of my food.

  As I left, my mom called me back.

  “Bailey, you forgot your cell.” I sighed in relief and walked back to pick it up. My mom had given me some money, so I left her and the girls to get drinks, wal
king by Pete and his gang of sycophants on my way to the exit. Cooper was standing just outside the restaurant with his tongue down a girl’s throat. I hoped to get away without being seen, but as I passed them, he still managed to give me the finger.

  As I walked to the underwear store on the other side of the mall, I glanced around and saw Zane sitting with some friends at the fountain. They all wore black and were smoking in the mall, as I skirted around them, Zane called over.

  “Hey, that’s my new sis.”

  I groaned with my face going beet red and walked faster as one of his friends approached me, grabbing hold of my arm and spinning me around.

  “Well,” the guy said, with dead black eyes, “she’s not much to look at.” He squeezed my breasts and my whole body froze.

  “She’s not much to touch either. Guess it sucks to be you, bro.” He shoved me away from him hard and I walked to the store with tears in my eyes and the laughter that sounded after that statement ringing in my ears.

  I tried to forget about the guy and his rough hands but had to swallow a few times over the lump in my throat. To distract myself I bought some gorgeous green silk pajamas, two plain white bras for school, and four new underwear sets, going for a luscious purple set with black lace, a fire-engine red set with cream lace, and two white push-up bras. As I paid for my purchases, which came to one hundred and fifty dollars, I heard a knock on the window and saw my off-white bra being waved about like a flag.

  Cooper stood outside the shop and as I walked out with my face burning, he called to me.

  “Lose something, Bailey?”

  I ignored him and walked back to meet my mom and the girls. I just wanted the day to be over, but fate had other ideas.

  I dived into the bathrooms and pulled out one of my new white push-up bras, putting it on. As I left the stall, I walked over the hand basins to splash my face and the door to the bathroom opened. The girl Cooper had been necking earlier walked in and shoved me hard against the mirror. “Stay away from him,” was all she said before she walked out leaving me standing alone with a cut on my eye.

  I pressed some tissue to it and rushed back to meet my mom with my cheek throbbing and my face burning. I took my cell out when I got into the restaurant to call my mom when I saw that the screen was smashed, leaving the phone unusable.

  I turned and fled, running from the mall. As I ran outside, Zane was standing at the lot we’d parked our car in, and I blew by him and his cloud of smoke. My eyes were so full of tears that I couldn’t see where the bus stop was, and my eye had started to bleed again. The bags in my hands were pulled and almost ripped out of my hands but I managed to hold on to them as I spun around in a circle, and then let go before I was ready, sending me sprawling to the ground. It was a dark-haired guy with cold almost black eyes and he laughed as he stood over me for a beat, before turning and walking away.

  I glanced over at Zane; he stood laughing at me as I picked myself up and took off running again. I made it onto the bus with a throbbing wrist to match my throbbing face. After half an hour, I made it to the crematorium. I wandered around for a while, looking at the old graves before making my way slowly up to Louis’s grave.

  I missed my big brother so much, and I always came here when things got too much for me. I lay down on the damp grass and began telling him about my new family. I closed my eyes and could picture him smiling at me as I lay there spilling my soul.

  When I finished speaking, I just lay and listened to the quiet of the graveyard, letting the whistling of the gentle wind soothe me to sleep. I woke up hours later to find my grandad standing over me with a pensive look on his face.

  “What are you doing here so early, Bailey?”

  His voice showed concern and I sat up, wincing as my back protested to sleeping on the cold hard ground.

  “I guess I fell asleep. What time is it, Gramps?”

  I couldn’t check my cell and I was worried that my mom would be freaking out about me not being at home.

  “It’s seven a.m. Come on. I’ll drive you home.”

  I couldn’t believe I’d spent the night in a graveyard or how long I’d managed to sleep without being disturbed. My teeth rattled as I scooped up my shopping bags and followed after him as he led the way down to his car. My back was damp from sleeping on the ground and I didn’t realize how cold I was until I was in the car and Gramps had put the heating on.

  He drove the twenty minutes it took to get home without speaking to me. It had been a while since I’d seen my grandparents. Alexa had seen to that, but I missed them.

  “You come by and visit, ya hear?” Gramps said as our apartment duplex came into sight. It was red brick with a small front garden and large shared back yard.

  “Yes, sir. I will.”

  “And Bailey-“he muttered and I paused turning back to him. His eyes scanned my face and he took in the marks on it with pursed lips. “What happened to your face, girl?”

  My heart raced and I smiled sadly at him.

  “I fell over, grandpa.”

  He nodded accepting my answer and glanced ahead before turning back to face me.

  “Okay, but you call me if you need me okay. Our number is the same.”

  “Thank you,” I whispered as I turned away from him and opened the door.

  I climbed out of the car with my shopping bags tight to my chest and released a breath of relief at being home, but something was wrong. There was a moving van outside. I began to panic and rushed towards it, praying that my mom wasn’t really moving us away, but when I reached the van my worst fear was confirmed.

  Shawn was standing there and so was my mom. My mom’s eyes widened at the sight of me, and she shook her head, knowing that I was usually pretty clumsy, but Shawn moved towards me. My mom put her hand on his chest and whispered something into his ear. He turned and walked back inside as I moved towards my mom.

  “Bailey, what happened to you? You’re a complete mess.” Her tone was cold, and I knew she didn’t care. I stepped around her, heading for Leah’s when she moved into my path. “I asked you what happened?” she said forcefully, and I glared at her, or at least I tried to.

  Deciding that it didn’t matter what I said, she wouldn’t believe me anyway, so I told her, “I fell over and skinned my wrist.” I decided to go for broke, hoping she’d have sympathy for me, “I was texting and I tripped, breaking my cell.” Her gaze narrowed, and she glared at the bags in my hands.

  “How much did you spend today?” she asked, not caring that I was hurt or that I was clearly upset.

  “I spent one hundred and fifty dollars.” She glared at me and nodded.

  “We’ll just hold off on getting you a new cell until you’ve made another one hundred and fifty dollars, then. It’s not okay to go around breaking two cells in a matter of weeks. You need to learn the value of the dollar, Bailey.” I shrugged and tried to move past her, my black sweater sticking to my back, and my hair curling against my neck

  “We’re moving today, so you best go and see Leah and Alice now, because come tomorrow we won’t be back here.” Her words hit me like a ton of bricks.

  “But what about school?” I asked her, my voice breaking. Her answer hurt me more than anything else that had happened up until then.

  “Oh, you’re changing schools Monday, didn’t I tell you that?” Her smile was vicious, and she knew that she’d told me no such thing.

  As I walked into Leah’s apartment, Shawn came back outside carrying boxes, and he glanced over at me.

  “Better make it quick, we need to pack your room yet.” I nodded at him, not caring about anything at all. My mom was ruining my life, taking me away from Leah, Alice, and Wendy, and she didn’t even care that she was putting me into hell.

  The next hour at Leah’s went too quickly, and I was dragged away to pack up my room. My mom had obviously started without me because most of my clothes had been put in black bags.

  As I took them out and packed them properly, my mom appeared a
t the door, rolling her eyes when she saw what I was doing.

  “Bailey, I’m going with Shawn and the movers. Cooper will be here to pick you up soon, so I suggest you hurry and make sure that anything you want to keep is taken. We won’t be back here after today.”

  She narrowed her eyes at me as I folded up my Evil Dead shirt and placed it into a box. My mom had wanted a prissy princess-like girl and instead, she got me with my fondness for black loose clothes.

  My bed had been dismantled as had my dresser and I searched around for my laptop, finding it and my cable on the floor. I packed them quickly and glanced around, peeling photos of Alice, Leah, Wendy, and me from my bulletin board. I also boxed up my bathroom and walked out to check on my room as the movers carried some of my boxes outside.

  I moved to my closet and glanced around for the box of stuff that I’d kept from Louis. It wasn’t there and I began to panic. My mom had cleaned his room out a week after his death and turned it into a study neither of us used. I’d salvaged his football jersey, his prize ball, and some teddy bears. I’d also salvaged his school yearbook and all our photos of him and hid them in my closet in a box labeled private.

  “Mom,” I called as I rushed out to the living room, but she wasn’t there. My eyes were stinging as I ran from room to room seeing loads of boxes, but not the one I was looking for. I checked everywhere in the house and then ran outside.

  My heart raced as I saw it sitting beside the garbage can and I ran over to it, scooping it up and holding it to my chest. I couldn’t believe it; my mom tried to throw my memories away again. Sometimes I really hated her. My hands shook as I walked back inside and a few tears escaped my eyes, rolling down my cheeks.

  Seeing the box of my brother’s things discarded like that hurt me in ways I couldn’t describe. I placed it gently on the windowsill, opening it slowly and breathing a sigh of relief when I found everything was still in the box. I didn’t check on it often, but I knew exactly what was inside. I closed it softly over and spun around to take in my room one last time.

  It had been stripped bare and I perched on the sill, sadly looking around. I didn’t even have a cell to call Wendy to tell her, or to talk to her. I picked up my glasses and put them on. I hid behind them and the feel of them on my nose calmed me. They’d belonged to Louis and I wore them to keep part of him with me.