Animalistic

by Nunn, Alexis

  “And every day, you give in to your unwavering love for family. What would you ever do without me?” He scoffed, non-insultingly.

  “Go crazy. I need my jukebox of humor.”

  “A jukebox? Ladies and gentlemen, I am in fact a jukebox! You heard it here first!” He slung his paws over the backrest of the couch and gave me a tongue-lolled smile.

  “That’s exactly what I meant!” I snorted, trying to unwind.

  He kept his tongue poking out and rested his head down, staring, stressing his ‘eyebrows’ over his eyes.

  It wasn’t late enough to hit the hay. I supposed it was appropriate to eat.

  “You wanna eat something? I might fix some Ramen that Fadiyah gave us. I know Lewis brought a whole trunk of food up for us. So I think supplies are good.”

  TWENTY-TWO

  Lewis was clingier than I had earlier noticed. It was interesting to listen to him talk about what it was like to live in the city.

  As he described it, there were two stations to get out. At first, there is a large wall with barbed wire outside the city. Outside the wall there is a single hall that leads out into the surrounding country. The hall has sensors equipped to scan all objects brought back. It was more like airport security than zombie apocalypse movie.

  He kept mentioning how most cities were on the look out to bring in outside Rebels and to sanitize them. The less people outside, the less there was to infect. However, I don’t think he understood that no matter how much he hinted, I could not go back with him. I’d be deported for illegal immigration.

  The Frymoores had to be approved before they left the city. The whole situation wasn’t as strict as it seems, they just wanted to protect the citizens. On the count of family and the highest precautions, the family was able to leave. They were on a time limit, however. Although the city was kind enough for them to head out every so months, if the rules were broken, the Frymoores were not allowed back.

  Apparently, as told by Beverly, they had to be vaccinated to leave the city. The vaccine was only temporary, seeing as the Animal Wendigo Virus mutated too often for a precise vaccination. All pets had to be vaccinated monthly, even though some die from side effects. The vaccination was not deemed safe enough of a prevention after seven days. Once that time ran up, the outsiders were not allowed back.

  There was the exception of a Rebel being brought back.

  Robert Schocke was a Rebel. The definition of a Rebel was someone who ignored the country wide announcement to move inside the walls built around certain provinces. It wasn’t breaking the law, just didn’t aid the law.

  Robert got away on most things, considering he was no longer in legal databases. They lost him and his family. I’m sure there was a layer of guilt to the decision not to go inside the walls. Only people inside the cities still are accounted for. All Rebels, although most still alive, are presumed dead or infected. Fadiyah and Lilya have no current school education. Robert teaches them what he deems important enough to know. (That means no Calculus.) If Fadiyah was in school, she would’ve been a freshman since she just turned fifteen.

  Almost no outside animal was free from some form of the virus. The version we met back in Indiana and winter were the most severe of the cases reported anymore. The virus tamed itself down but was still viable to transform people into the animal and attack. The animals are still vicious and dangerous.

  I’m just angry it was the severe that Feliks encountered.

  What I have learned about Lewis is that he still played French horn for his high school band (good). He was a senior. He was seventeen, weirdly enough the same age as me but ahead in grade. That meant Feliks was two years older than him. He likes rock mostly. On top of that, Lewis was confusing.

  I couldn’t understand what he was trying to accomplish. He’d try to add compliments into random, casual conversations. If anything, it was unnecessary. I already knew my hair was soft. I already knew my hazel eyes stood out in the sun. I didn’t get it.

  TWENTY-THREE

  March 16th was finally here. Lewis was as bubbly as Lilya today. Beverly, well, she didn’t complain so it couldn’t have been bad. Robert watched us with a shy excitement.

  I forgot often how human he was. He wasn’t evil. He was only a protective father. I really needed to forgive him. We started out on a bad foot. It took him a while to get over his contempt for a werebie around his family to accept us. I was grateful for him; he saved us from starvation in the cold.

  Yet, I had nothing to give him on his birthday.

  The morning started off as it always had. The sun brightened up my curtains and Feliks’s clawed clicked outside. He never stayed in his room, but he only became active once the sun was up high.

  I pushed myself out of bed, not wanting to pull the plush covers off my head and untuck my arm from under the pillow. Comfortable as possible, I never want to get up. For the sake of Robert on his big day, I made myself get up.

  From the foot of my bed, I removed my sleeping shirt and readjusted my sports bra (which I always slept in) before opening the drawers on my dresser. There wasn’t much option. I picked a pair of pants that was a lighter blue. They were tossed off onto my bed. I opened the top drawer and fluffed through the various flannels. I judged the day wouldn’t surpass about mid sixty degree Fahrenheit, so I thought it would be appropriate. The day was a special occasion, so I picked one of the stiffer, slimmer shirts. It was dark blue and black, so it would match well.

  I grabbed a wad of paired socks from the basket on top, picking the pair I wore when I arrived. The toes were close to threadbare but they fit the best.

  While pulling on the flannel, I grabbed my leather belt. I looped the belt through the rings and removed my flowy night pants. After stretching, I plopped down on my bed and put on my thin socks. Next, the pants were pulled on over my boxers and socks. I groaned, tired already, and sat there for a second.

  My hair felt heavy, mussed up from fitful sleeping. I’d have to fix it after putting on my Docs.

  It felt like too much to do in the morning. I hate waking up. That was simple enough to understand about me. Sometimes I wish I could just sleep forever, but I wasn’t sure if I could leave this world behind. Mornings were the last of my repressed problems.

  My boots rested together under the desk. The chair faced away from the desk, wheels scooted over top of my shoelaces. I yawned, getting up and snatching the boots. The chair spun around and knocked my big toe.

  “Gah!” I tossed my boots on my bed and sat down to lace the boots up. I tightened the laces as tight as they would go. The pressure exerted on my laced hurt my fingers.

  Completely dressed, I was now ready to go brush my teeth and wet my hair.

  The hall was empty, meaning Feliks was probably in the living room or making something to eat. His eating by himself was more sticking his face in a cereal box I kept under the sink where there was no cabinet door. It was honestly quite a show, especially when his head got stuck.

  The walls were still cold from the night and I could tell today would be a cold one. No matter how warm it felt to the skin, I would feel cold. That feeling had been dormant for a while until now. Great timing.

  The switch to the bathroom was on the left hand side right as you opened the door. The panel around it was black and didn’t match the dark wood paneled walls. The sink was close to the door, also on the left side. The sink was a white porcelain that looked cracked along the basin.

  I popped up the stopper on the faucet and held my toothbrush underneath the running water. The mirror fogged slightly above me, but I hadn’t given enough time or effort yet to clear it.

  I brushed my teeth with just water first, breaking away plaque and then added toothpaste, the little I had left, to the bristles. I wet the brush once more and continuously brushed my teeth. I wet it every full cycle until no paste was left. As I set the toothbrush back into the ceramic jar, I thought to myself how Xavier probably didn’t brush his teeth like me. Then I remembered my
toothbrush was borrowed, and my stomach felt queasy. Everything I thought of typically ruined the thing for me. Brushing my teeth would be a daily thing, so I saw no escape. It was best to forget about it. You are wearing boy boxers, Darylene, are you sure you want to complain? I didn’t.

  It was time for my hair. My sleeves slid past my hands so I gripped them into a mitten and used the fabric to wipe away at the fogged up mirror. My hair did stick up in odd places, making my uneven strands obvious. I should take my time next time when I cut my hair. Yet, right now, who cares? It suited me well.

  I pulled up the knob of the faucet and let free a small but steady stream of cool water. I cupped my palm under the stream and splashed it on my hair. This process repeated until my hair was almost dripping. At that point, the fine hair was tamed enough to be malleable and shaped. I never did much with it, but I hated my hair being too spiky. It curled outwards anyway after it dried, but it was worse without it.

  The comb sat in a small ceramic cup with my toothbrush. The teeth were warped from either age or use. It was still useful.

  I just stared into the mirror while combing my hair down to my head. It was a routine and had been for years, ever since I cut my hair short. I pushed my bangs onto my forehead, swiping them to my left just slightly. I parted my hair on my left and pulled everything on the top forwards. The rest of my hair was combed down. The tips of my hair was barely long enough to curl up at the nape of my neck and start to brush over my ears. I really did do a poor job.

  The deed was done. Now it was time to face to world.

  Or more like Robert’s family.

  Outside, the air refreshed me. Robert stood outside his house, beaming happily on the top step that lead to his door. He kept his weight on one leg, the other outwards on the heel, relaxed. One hand stayed on his hip while the other dangled. He was chipper today, not average of old people on a birthday. Sorry, not old, middle aged.

  This was a day that he could surround himself with family and be happy about it. That made me happy. He was a new father to me, in a way. I wasn’t happy for myself, I was happy for him.

  I stepped out from my doorway and let it drift shut rather than manually shut it. The collar of my flannel tickled the side of my neck with the stray fibers that hadn’t been worn off yet. Because of that, I kept shrugging or flicking my head to the side to interrupt the feeling. It must have been odd to watch me twitching as I walked down the beaten pathway towards where Robert was because as soon as he caught sight of me, his started laughing.

  Robert shook his head, raising only one eyebrow, “You look uncomfortable.”

  I answered him apathetically with a lighthearted shrug, “I’m not uncomfortable, but this shirt isn’t the best.”

  “It looks near brand new,” He tilted his head and gave it a quick look over. I nodded.

  “I think it is, or at least only worn once, this thing is stiff and starchy.”

  “That Tuttle boy always was bringing home clothes. I don’t think he ever wore all of them. So, you kids have this day planned for me, don’t you?”

  Robert smiled for a few seconds, gazing at me. We didn’t come eye to eye, his eyebrows were in my eye range, yet he still met my own gaze. With a cheerful smirk, I bobbed my head and sighed.

  “Eeyup. You don’t have to worry about a thing. Fadiyah and I are setting up the bonfire. Lewis claims he has presents for you. Beverly… Whatever she’s doing. I didn’t really talk to her,” At that Robert interjected that he could understand that. He agreed she was hard to handle when she didn’t feel like being reasonable. I continued, “And Feliks is gonna keep guard for us.”

  The plan sounded good to him. The birthday was going to be simple, yet not without care. All that mattered was being close to those he cared about. That group included me, too. And I included Feliks. If I had been told that the man who nearly shot and killed Feliks upon arrival was now our buddy and provider, I would’ve checked their eyes for a concussion.

  “I’m not afraid to say I don’t regret letting you two stay here with us,” The older man admitted to me, not looking in my direction. We stood side by side and faced the other houses. What he said hit me full impact. There was a part of me that honestly thought he hated us. I sincerely thought he was still the man that held Feliks up by the neck and screamed at me. I was wrong. I was wrong about him this entire time. He wasn’t the hateful one, I was the one stuck on a first impression.

  Even though he didn’t cast me a look, I turned to him. I took in the shape of his face, the gentle curve of his nose, the slope of his forehead, the darkness of his wrinkles that faded perfectly into the rest of him. I stared at him in this sudden amazement of who he really was.

  Robert went on, stepping back a hair, “I’m really not. I’m just as surprised as you are. You’ve been around long enough that I got attached to you. Both of you kids. I only had one kid in my life. Cassidy was enough for me and my wife. I lost her to lung cancer and then Cassidy. I got Lilya out of it, just this little doll. I raised her just as I did her mother. And she became my second child. Maybe it was out of sorrow, or maybe a glimpse at how desperate some kids are to needing a family, but I filed to be a foster parent. It was harder than hell to get approved. I never had a conviction, never did anything unlawful, but it took years. Finally, I got Fadiyah. The poor thing. She was mute when I got her. She wouldn’t talk to me or the court.”

  That couldn’t have been true, “She was?”

  “Selective mutism. The whole thing that she witnessed… It’d traumatize anyone. She didn’t really come out of that until Lilya started going to preschool. I remember going into her room with candy, trying to comfort her and she’d be on her bed with her face into one of those scarves. Her mother’s hijabs. They mean a lot to her. I told her so many times that I’d take her somewhere, no matter how far or long it took to go be involved in the religion but she refused. She was so angry about me trying to help, but I told her it was her choice. I don’t think that girl is really atheist. She’s young. I think she’s just scared to be wrong.”

  “That’s really sad. But what does that mean to me? About you not regretting us stay?”

  Robert’s eyes sparkled in the rising sun, brimming with excess water. He was close to crying at the thought. “Because. Because the sight of her clinging steadfast to your arm or side, jabbering up a storm just shows me what you accomplished to bring out in her in a month took me over a year. I think the only negative you are is that you eat up all me food,” He jabbed me jokingly.

  A smile etched across myself and I giggled, “Like I eat any more than you do!”

  “You sayin’ I’m fat?” He pouted, hunching over a little, extremely expressive.

  “I’m not callin’ you little, well, outwards.”

  We both just laughed. I was at the point I could insult him and not make him angry. Today was a good day.

  “I’m glad I’ve had the opportunity to have five kids, even if most of you came late in the game.”

  At this point in the conversation, there was a pulling need for me to replicate the affection directed towards me. I couldn’t give him a speech back. We were planning to save that for the end of the bonfire.

  “I can’t say this tonight, since we have guests, but thank you for not killing my brother. I couldn’t live without Feliks. Keeping a werebie around couldn’t have been an easy decision. I’m grateful. And I can’t believe you actually hated me.”

  “I did.”

  “Well. Okay. Thanks.”

  Robert groaned, “I mean, I really didn’t like him being here. I hated the arrangement you put me in. I admit, I was endangering you sometimes but I was just trying to protect my two dependents. Yes, I set out traps to catch Feliks. Yes, I threatened you. Yes, I was very cross and rude. But you know, I wasn’t trying to do it out of hate. I was just trying to do what seemed was the best. Lilya and Fadiyah loved you guys. They got so attached so fast, I couldn’t just run you off. I didn’t care too much about you staying…
”

  “It was Feliks that scared you?”

  “Of course he did!” He waved his hand, blinking. The fact made him feel bad, “He still does, but it’s not like that anymore. The person I made you put up with back then had to have come off as an ass, but I… I don’t think we should be on those kind of terms anymore. We aren’t getting rid of each other any time soon, so we have to forget about the past.”

  “Start over now?” He nodded. I dropped my cool stance, swooped down to his level, and hugged him.

  His back popped and Robert made a choking noise, “Kid. Darylene. That’s enough.”

  I released him with a beaming smile while he rolled his shoulders, muttering about how strong I was for a scrawny, lanky girl.

  “You hurt?”

  He waved me off, insisting he was fine, just startled at my unanticipated embrace. He distanced himself from me, but only to go back to surveying.

  “Has anyone went on a patrol yet?”

  Robert informed me that Fadiyah had left with Lewis in the earlier morning. She was showing him what they did each day for protection. He was adamant about ensuring they were safe but apprehensive about waltzing out into the forest on foot. Despite being vaccinated, he was scared to be attacked. He wouldn’t be infected but he could still get mauled to death. Lewis Frymoore was more concerned about himself getting attacked than Fadiyah getting attacked. That shows his priorities. Beverly decided to stay in bed for as long as she could. ‘Travelling exhaustion’ she called it. Everyone knew she was being a cranky old woman and would rather not argue with her logic.

  Feliks wasn’t out patrolling with them. Instead, he was collecting wood to put into the bonfire. He already had a pile started. He had to get most of his work done before Lewis and Fadiyah came back. It would be a weird sight for Lewis. He was still under the facade that Feliks was an everyday dog that was just the family pet. Family dogs usually don’t collect dry wood and inspect them before tossing them into the bonfire pit. Lewis would be astonished to learn how we trained our pet to build fires and attain to them. The fire wasn’t roaring, but it would soon.