Fatal

by T. A. Brock

  A joke. The Reaper was trying to be cute while Grayson was still making sense out of this new information. Aiken was telling the truth, Grayson could sense it. But he trusted Leiv and Raina above all. He’d talk to them about this as soon as he got home.

  “Have you told Cori yet?”

  Grayson frowned. “Told her what?”

  Aiken rolled his eyes. “That you love her, that you’re dead…any of the above?”

  “No. And I’m not going to.”

  “Hmm. Probably smart for now.”

  Grayson met his curious expression with a glare. “What do you mean, for now? I plan on never telling her.”

  “I don’t think that’s such a great idea, civie.”

  Grayson didn’t really care what he thought. And what made him think he could go digging around in Grayson’s love life anyway? He’d put a stop to it.

  “So, you got a thing for Peg?” Grayson asked before the Reaper could dig any deeper.

  All humor drained from Aiken’s face like water draining from a bathtub. “No,” was all he said.

  Grayson cocked an eyebrow. “Oh, really? Then what was that at lunch?”

  “Drop it,” Aiken demanded.

  Grayson grinned evilly. “Now, why would I do that when it is so obviously bugging you?”

  Aiken turned his back on Grayson, pressing his palms into the side of the truck. When he spoke, it was a low hard sound.

  “She’s mine. My Save.”

  Grayson’s sarcastic smile melted away as cold ice encased him. All that talk about loving humans…and here was the Reaper coming face to face with his own Save. If Aiken truly felt like Grayson did, that being a zombie was a curse…

  He didn’t want to ask the obvious question, couldn’t actually. He was too afraid of the answer. Peg was Cori’s friend. If Aiken killed her…

  “Well, go ahead,” Aiken snapped. “Say something.”

  Grayson shook his head, his face grim. “I’ve got nothing to say.”

  The Reaper rounded on him. “Don’t you want to know if I’ll use her? Don’t you want to know how a Reaper gets around his oath to protect humans?”

  Grayson said nothing.

  “A Reaper’s Save is the only thing not bound by the oath. It isn’t illegal for a Reaper to use his Save.” Aiken said this hastily, as if to clear his conscience, to alleviate his guilt.

  Grayson knew the look in his eyes, knew it so well.

  “You want to, don’t you?”

  Shame blanketed Aiken’s face making it almost unrecognizable. “Yes,” he breathed. “I do.” His eyes were almost pleading, begging for absolution. But Grayson had none to give.

  He clenched his jaw as he finally gritted the words. “Will you? Will you kill her?”

  Aiken hung his head, but instead of answering the question, he blew Grayson’s mind again.

  “From my rising I knew I was an abomination, something twisted and perverted, not meant to be.” He spoke in a somber tone that reminded Grayson of himself. “I spent many miserable years hating my life…until I became a Reaper. Suddenly, this life-after-death thing had a point, a purpose. When I was approached by the Oracles concerning my Save, I told them to screw off.” He grinned wryly. “They were extremely offended, of course. But after much groveling, I convinced them I had no desire to ever meet my human. It wasn’t true at all. Truth was, I knew—as all zombies do—what happens to them when it’s all said and done. And I just couldn’t…”

  He shook his head, a disgusted look on his face.

  “I didn’t want to take the chance of ever meeting her. I didn’t want to take the chance that I’d be too weak to resist her. That I might use her and regret it every hour of every day.” He turned and kicked the side of his pretty red truck leaving a dent in the shape of his size-twelves. “I had no idea I’d meet her anyway. Had no clue that the pull would be so damn strong.”

  Grayson clenched his fists as the Reaper grew quiet, his eyes staring at the gravel beneath their feet. While he’d been so anxious to meet his Save, Aiken had purposely avoided his. Aiken had been determined not to kill her. Grayson had needed to fall in love with his in order to have that same determination. It occurred to him then that the Reaper was probably the one person in the world who hated what he was more than Grayson did.

  “I think you’re the only person who can help me,” Aiken said suddenly.

  Grayson looked at him, skeptical. “How could I help you?”

  “You understand how I feel, how badly I don’t want to hurt her, because you feel that way about Cori.”

  Aiken’s eyes grew wide, the wheels turning in his mind.

  “You just have to make sure I don’t cross any lines. Yeah, you can help me, civie.”

  Grayson stared at him, doubtful. “What? You want me to be your conscience or something?”

  “Yeah, kinda. Just…when I start to forget why it’s a bad idea, you can remind me. Convince me. Or, well, even kill me if you have to.”

  The statement stunned Grayson. He stared at the Reaper unable to believe what he was hearing.

  “And what if I become weak?” Grayson knew that would never happen, but he tried it on for size anyway.

  Aiken shook his head with certainty. “You won’t. I saw the look on your face when I questioned you. And yeah, you do remember choking me, right? You’d die before you hurt Cori, wouldn’t you?”

  Grayson nodded immediately. “Yeah, I would.”

  “That’s what I thought. So, will you help me?”

  He thought about it. Here was the chance to save a human from death. And she was a friend of Cori’s. But even if she wasn’t, Grayson knew it wouldn’t change his answer.

  “Yes. I’ll help you.” He sighed dramatically. “Just call me Jiminy Cricket.”

  Chapter 19

  What's Worse Than Dying

  CORI FOUND PEG AT HER LOCKER, fumbling with the lock. Her friend didn’t have her normal effervescent expression on her face. Instead she seemed glum.

  “Oh, hey, Cori,” Peg said. “Listen, Rex feels just awful about how he acted at lunch. He said he was going to call you tonight and talk to you.”

  Cori waved her off. “It’s already forgotten.” It wasn’t a lie. She had other things on her mind now. “Peg, I was wondering if you could give me Aiken’s phone number.”

  Peg peered at her through stray red curls with curiosity. “Sure. I uh…I’ve been trying to call him since lunch but he’s not answering.” Peg got her phone out and started moving her thumb around on the screen. “I mean, I was a little worried after lunch. He seemed sick or something. And I didn’t see him in the halls. He wasn’t in class was he?”

  Cori looked at her friend. She was nervous, flustered, and talking without taking a breath. Her shiny yellow nails seemed to shake as she tried to navigate her phone.

  “Peg?”

  “…I don’t even know what happened, really. I mean, we were talking about the dance one minute and then suddenly he was just mad…”

  “Peg.”

  “…Or at least he seemed mad. Did he seem mad to you? He’s usually so easy-going. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him like that…”

  “Peg!”

  She looked at Cori. “Yeah?”

  “Are you okay?”

  Peg smiled half-heartedly. “Oh, yeah. Sure. I’m fine. Here it is. I found it. Are you ready?”

  “Peg, what’s going on?”

  She laughed, but it sounded forced. “Nothing. I’m just a bit frazzled today. I’ve been busy getting everything ready for the dance. Can I ask why you want Aiken’s number?”

  “I needed to ask him something.”

  Peg nodded. “Oh.”

  What was that in her voice? It sounded like defeat.

  “Am I missing something here?” Cori asked, totally puzzled.

  Peg’s shoulders sank and her hands went up to cover her face. When she spoke, it was through her fingers. “No, Cori. You’re not missing anything. I’m just having an off d
ay. I’ve been hella busy and I’ve got a headache that doesn’t have a clue it’s supposed to go away with aspirin.” Her hands came down and she let out a slow measured breath. “Besides the number, is there anything I can help you with?” She smiled and Cori was relieved to see it was more natural than forced. But she wondered if there was something else bothering her friend. Knowing that Peg was trying to be strong, Cori decided it would be a good idea to give her something else to think about besides whatever problem was plaguing her.

  “Well, here’s the thing. Remember how I told you there was something wrong with Grayson, that he was sick or something?” Peg nodded. “Well, I was right. But he won’t talk about it at all. I’ve never pushed him on it because…well, because I didn’t want to upset him and he’s such a private person, you know.”

  Peg shut her locker and they started toward the parking lot.

  “What little information I’ve gotten from him hasn’t been good. I know that he’s not contagious but…whatever he has, it’s…it’s…” Cori’s throat closed up. “I’m afraid he’s dying,” she managed to squeak. Saying it brought on a wave of emotion she hadn’t fully expected, and she fought the urge to curl up in a ball and sob.

  Cori stopped walking.

  Peg was saying something. She forced herself to listen.

  “Are you sure? I mean did he tell you that? He doesn’t really look like he’s that sick, much less dying. Cori?” Peg’s eyes were worried, sympathetic.

  How could Cori tell her that she’d seen him looking already dead? How could she explain that he’d consumed a little water and was suddenly back to normal? She couldn’t. Part of her wondered if it had happened at all. If it weren’t for Aiken’s little episode at lunch…

  “I’m sure, Peg.”

  “Then you should talk to him about it. Definitely.”

  Cori shook her head. “He won’t. I’ve tried.”

  “Well, try harder. Because—” she took Cori’s hand and squeezed it “—I can see how much you care about him, and losing him so soon after losing your father would be devastating. At least if you talk about it there’s no mystery. You’ll know exactly what you’re in for.”

  That was the scary part. Cori didn’t want to think about losing Grayson. She wanted to ignore it completely. Or at least part of her did. Sometimes when she was alone and contemplating it, she could almost convince herself she was jumping to crazy conclusions. Grayson couldn’t die. Like Peg said, he seemed so vital. He wasn’t weak. She’d only seen him weak once. But what if she kept ignoring it, kept pretending he was fine, and suddenly one day he was gone? Like her dad. With no warning. The thought terrified her.

  Peg was right. She had to know.

  Cori looked at her friend. “That’s kind of why I wanted to talk to Aiken.”

  Peg’s lightly freckled forehead scrunched in confusion. “Aiken? Why Aiken?”

  This was where she had to be careful. “Well, I think the two of them have some history. I was hoping he might be able to shed some light on things. Anything he could tell me might help.”

  Peg nodded. “Yeah, that makes sense. Just…” A worried look flitted across her friend’s face. “Be careful okay, Cori?”

  Cori nodded, understanding that Peg was concerned.

  “And listen, if you need anything—even if it’s just to talk—I’m here for you. Okay?”

  “Thanks Peg.”

  On her way to meet Grayson at the cemetery, Cori dialed Aiken’s number. Three times. He never answered. Along the way, a red Passport screeched to a halt next to the sidewalk she was on.

  Rex leaned out the driver’s side window. “Do you need a ride?”

  Cori went over to the SUV. “No, I’m almost there.”

  Rex managed to look sheepish. “Cori, I feel I must apologize for my behavior at lunch today. I was terribly rude. There was no excuse for it and I am immensely sorry.”

  “I’m not sure I’m the one you should apologize to.”

  “Yes, Peg informed me of that already. I will…” He seemed to swallow something distasteful. “Apologize to Grayson as well. And I will try to be more tolerant in the future. Can you forgive me?”

  Cori wondered if she should inform him that the future was short for Grayson.

  “All is forgiven, Rex.”

  He seemed relieved. “Good. All right, good.”

  By the time Cori stepped through the gates of Stonehenge, she’d tried Aiken’s phone two more times and had left a message. As she meandered through the gray-tinged gravestones on her way to the river, she passed by the Hawthorp crypt that Grayson liked so much. Red roses of varying shades were clustered around the entrance. A sudden feeling of anguish had Cori stopping directly in front of it.

  She gazed at the two angels that flanked the cement structure. The more she stared, the more she realized that she despised the one that was rejoicing. How utterly insensitive for her to be rejoicing while those left behind mourned their loss. How could she be happy that a life was taken so early? Cori understood the other angel so much better. Losing a loved one meant you should mourn. Forget being happy that they’d made it to heaven when their absence from earth was such a tragedy. Cori wasn’t ashamed to admit that she would much rather her dad be here with her on earth than watching her from the clouds.

  Would she feel like that when she lost Grayson too?

  She already knew the answer.

  Cori forced her feet to walk the remaining distance to the outcropping of trees that bordered the river. As soon as she’d stepped through the thick foliage, she spotted Grayson perched on their rock, his forearms resting on his knees. His boots were nearby, so she knew he’d been walking in the water.

  Immediately he got up and came to her, embracing her so her feet weren’t touching the ground. He was strong. Solid. How could he be so strong if he was dying? It didn’t make sense.

  “Where have you been, shrimp?” he whispered into her hair.

  Cori shivered as she clung to him. Maybe she was wrong. Maybe he was fine.

  Grayson set her back on her feet and tried to pull away but she was holding on too tight.

  “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

  Cori shook her head; she couldn’t speak yet.

  “Cori? Talk to me. What’s wrong?”

  She spoke into his chest, so quietly she hoped he wouldn’t hear. “I’m scared.”

  Grayson went stock still. The hand that had been rubbing her back reassuringly rested frozen on her shoulder.

  “Scared? Of what?” His voice was hard. He tilted her head up until their eyes met. “I would never let anything hurt you.”

  Funny for him to say it like that. Didn’t he remember telling her if they got involved she would inevitably get hurt?

  “What if…what if you can’t help it?”

  That little crease formed between his black eyebrows. “What are you talking about?”

  “Remember when you told me about regrets? You said…” She stopped talking because he’d suddenly let her go and stepped away.

  Grayson stared down at her with a harsh expression she didn’t quite understand. “I remember what I said.”

  Cori swallowed back the lump in her throat. She didn’t like how he was acting. “I think…I think we should talk about it, Grayson.”

  “Talk about what?” He turned and went back over to the riverbank.

  Cori followed him. “I think we should talk about whatever’s going on with you—” she took a deep breath “—and with Aiken.”

  His back went rigid. “We don’t like each other. That’s all. We’ll work it out eventually.”

  “That’s not what I’m talking about,” she said to his back.

  “Where did you go after school?”

  “I didn’t go anywhere. I had to talk to Peg and then I walked here. Don’t change the subject, Grayson. You know what I want to talk about.”

  He picked up a pebble and chucked it into the river. “Yeah, well I don’t want to talk about
it. So…”

  She stepped closer to him, wet leaves sliding under her shoes. “Listen, I need to know what’s going on with you,” she told him quietly. Maybe if he understood. “It hasn’t been that long since…since I lost my dad. I just need to know what to expect.” Her throat closed up on the last word.

  Grayson hung his head, still not looking at her. It was forever before he answered.

  “Expect the worst, Cori. With me, just expect the worst.”

  When Cori got home, she tried for two hours to get a hold of Aiken without success.

  Around six o’clock her mom walked through the door. Cori was so stunned that she dropped the bag of chips she’d been holding.

  “Oh, hey, honey.” Her mom spoke around two stuffed paper shopping bags. “I’m making dinner tonight, so don’t spoil your supper.” She stepped delicately around the chips that Cori was plucking off the floor.

  “Dinner? Really?” Cori didn’t mean to sound so surprised.

  “Yes, really. Pasta sound okay?”

  Cori nodded numbly. It sounded great.

  She watched as her mother went into the kitchen. Then looked at the clock again. Yep, it really was six fifteen.

  She followed her into the kitchen. For a while she just stared, not sure what to say. “Need help?” she finally asked.

  Mom was busy filling a pasta pot with water. “Sure. Why don’t you spread some butter on that loaf of bread? Cut it length-wise first.”

  The kitchen was mostly silent as the two of them went about their tasks. The clock on the wall ticked away the minutes and Cori heard every one of them as they inched by. She desperately wanted to break the silence but had no idea what to say. And she’d never been great at conversation anyway. Her mom was the outgoing one.

  “So how’s school going? Do you like Westland Heights?”

  Cori nodded as she started chopping lettuce for a salad. “Yeah, it’s nice enough.”

  “Made any friends?”

  “A few.”

  Her mom stopped stirring the alfredo sauce and looked up in blatant surprise. “Really?” Cori nodded and tried not to take offense at her mother’s astonished tone.