Playing God

by Sarah Zettel

I'm sorry, she thought to her mother's consciousness on its journey to the Ancestors. I didn't know what else to do. I didn't mean to kill you, or Res. I miss you, that's all. I know you're not really here anymore, but I want you to be. I don't want to be alone, I don't. Forgive me.

  She might have dozed off for a little while, she wasn't sure. All she knew was that she felt a familiar touch on the back of her head.

  “My Daughter,” said her mother softly. “My brave Daughter.”

  Theia jerked her head up. Mother stood in front of her, a little stooped, and her ears waved aimlessly, but her eyes were focused on Theia.

  “Mother!” Theia leapt into her arms. She would have climbed into her pouch if she could, but as it was she wrapped her arms around her mother and hugged her hard.

  “Easy, easy, now, my Daughter,” chided Mother. “I am fragile these days.”

  Theia pulled back just a little. Tears stung her eyes. “Are you good, Mother?”

  “A little, not very, and I don't know for how long.” Her ears waved, as wild and restless as her wandering had been. “Everything comes at me like waves. It's distant, then it's right smack in front of me, and it's distant again.” She swayed on her feet, and Theia, her heart in her mouth, steadied her.

  “I don't know how long I have, Daughter. You have to get me to the Home of Queens. Now, Theia. Do you understand?” Mother clutched at her, her eyes widening with fear or urgency, or both. “Bring the letter, do you understand? Bring the letter.”

  “Yes, Mother.” Theia snatched her wallet off the table where she'd left it and stuffed the letter inside. “Come with me.” Theia linked her arm through her mother's, trying not to feel how erratically her skin twitched. Together, they slipped out the back door.

  It was midafternoon. All the good cousins were inside with Ciean and her swelling womb, taking their lessons and digesting whatever Aunt Armetrethe poured into them.

  The family's battered frame car was in the drive. Aunt Armetrethe commandeered Council transportation these days. Theia could drive, after a fashion. Ciean and the cousins had been teaching her and Res. The steering on the old car was stiff and cantankerous, but she could keep it mostly on the road. She gripped the wheel, worked the levers, and bared her teeth to the wind and rain. Mother sat next to her, shivering and clutching at her arm and shoulder occasionally.

  “I'm here!” she'd shout every now and then. “I'm still here.”

  “We're both here,” Theia answered.

  “Yes,” said Mother, and Theia could swear she heard real satisfaction in her voice. “We're both here.”

  The arms-sisters had barricaded the streets leading to the Home of Queens. They knew Theia, and apparently no contravening orders had been handed down, so they raised the barricades and let them drive through.

  They made it all the way to the gates of the Home of Queens, where a prime-sister waved them to a stop.

  “We need to get through,” said Theia to the prime-sister, who'd had both her ears ripped ragged in some combat long ago. Theia wracked her brains for the prime's name.

  “Theiareth Shin t'Theria, right?” The prime-sister squinted at her. “I'm sorry, Noblest Sister, but your aunt Armetrethe's been specific. You're not permitted entry to the Home.”

  “What about me?” said Mother.

  The Prime-Sister turned her head slowly, as if noticing Mother for the first time.

  “Praeis Shin?” she said, wonderingly. “I thought… I'd heard…”

  Mother bared her teeth. “There are more rumors in the service man there are guns,” she said, a little too fast, a little too tight. “I am still a representative of the Queens-of-All and one of the Noblest Sisters t'Theria. You will let my daughter and me through immediately. Immediately.”

  The prime-sister hesitated. Theia tapped her foot to get the Ancestors’ attention.

  “Immediately,” repeated Mother, her ears waving agitatedly.

  “Yes, Noblest Sister.” The prime-sister stood back and gestured for the gate to be opened.

  “Thank you,” breathed Theia to the Ancestors as she drove through.

  She parked the car right in the middle of the cobbled yard. Her mother climbed out, stumbling a little on the stones. Theia grabbed her arm. “Are you good?”

  Mother focused on her, a little too slowly. “No. Get me in to the Queens, Daughter. Get me in. There's not much longer.”

  Theia took her arm and pulled her close. “Then here we go, Mother.”

  She stretched her legs for all they were worth, hurrying, up the stairs and striding across the receiving rooms. Mother staggered and leaned heavily on her, but kept the pace. Councilors and their assistants turned to stare. Theia saw them out of the corners of her eyes. She didn't break her stride. She was up the stairs and into the Debating Chamber before anybody could make enough sense out of what they saw to raise objections.

  Ueani Byu jumped to her feet as Theia burst in, dragging Mother with her as fast as she could.

  “How dare you!” boomed the Queen. “What is this…”

  “Intrusion?” inquired Mother. She extracted her arm from Theia's.

  “I would have suggested perversion,” said Aires Byu mildly from the sofa she shared with Vaier Byu.

  “Intrusion, perversion.” Mother's ears crumpled and straightened. “Yes, I am both. Both. Here and now, and you will hear me and now, this one last time, my Majestic Sisters.”

  “Why should we do so?” asked Aires Byu.

  “Because if you don't, the Humans will take your world, your world, your titles, your people right out from under you and leave you staring stupid, lost as I am between All-Cradle and the Ancestors.” Mother clutched a table edge. Theia started forward, but checked herself uncertainly.

  “The letter, Theia,” said Mother. “Give your Majestic Sisters the letter. The letter.” She closed her eyes and her mouth kept moving.

  Theia pulled the letter out of her pocket and moved into the semicircle of Queens. Without even thinking, she handed it to Vaier Byu.

  The Queen took it and looked at the lettering. Her mouth puckered, and her ears fell back. She handed it to Aires Byu.

  Aires handed it to Theia. “This is a Human written thing. You will, of your kindness, Noblest Sister, read it to us.”

  Theia felt her ears crumble from sheer embarrassment. “I'm sorry, Majestic Sisters. I forgot.”

  “Forget forget,” murmured Mother. “Read it, Theia.”

  Theia opened the letter and read it. The Queens listened in complete silence. None of them even twitched an ear or a fold of skin.

  When Theia finally lowered the letter, it was as if she faced a cluster of statues.

  “Well, if we needed proof the Humans were liars, we have it now.” Ueani Byu struck the wall with her fist. “Idiots! We've been idiots!”

  “No!” cried Mother.

  Vaier Byu got to her feet. “Praeis Shin, you are in the Change. Give your will to the Ancestors and leave those of us who are not so lucky to suffer the Humans’ anger.”

  Mother looked at Theia desperately. “Web! Theia! Tell them, tell them, tell them we win. We win because of the letter and the web. Lynn gave us our victory. Tell them!”

  Theia understood. Warmth rushed through her blood, and she almost laughed out loud.

  “She's right!” She ran to her mother and grasped her shoulders. “Ancestors Mine! We've got them hot and cold!”

  “Would you be so good as to explain this jubilation?” asked Aires Byu.

  Theia faced them, one hand on her mother's shoulder. “The Humans’ communication web is a forum for argument as well as a way to exchange information. It's a debate wall that stretches up and down the Human Chain. Corps, corporations like Bioverse, can be broken by having their illegal or immoral actions made public in the web.” She lifted the letter triumphantly. “This may not be illegal, but there are many, Majestic Sisters, who will find it repugnantly immoral.”

  “And how will breaking Bioverse help us?”
Ueani barked. “It will leave us that much worse than before they came.”

  “Threats,” said Mother. She swayed a little, but her ears were straight and still.

  “We don't have to do it, we just have to threaten to do it,” said Theia. “It's a trump card, it's a hold over them. A sword in our hands. While we can threaten them with this, they will be forced to deal with us, not just take our resources and leave.” She looked at the Queens, and the Queens stared back, ears tipped backward and faces smooth. “Listen,” said Theia, searching for the right words, trying to imagine how her mother would explain this. “From the first we have been subject to the Humans’ will and conditions. We had no power once we signed their agreement. We had something they wanted, to be sure, but they held our lives, and they knew it. They held their power over us, and we had nothing to counter it with. We had no way to tell them they could not treat us so, could not make such demands on us. Now”—she held the paper aloft—“we do.”

  “Which would be marvelous, if we knew how to make use of this magical web,” said Aires Byu.

  “I know how,” Theia told her.

  “So”—Aires Byu's face wrinkled into an expression of amusement—“now we have to bargain with you?”

  “Yes.” Theia bared her teeth, just a little. “Now you have to bargain with me.” She tucked the paper into her wallet. She felt her mother's approval run through her and rejoiced. Do you hear, Res? Do you? We finally showed them all! “And with all due respect, my Majestic Sister, to do so, you must also rebuild the Confederation.”

  Ueani Byu started forward, fist raised. Vaier Byu caught her arm. Her ears and eyes focused directly on Theia, and Theia held herself still. Vaier Byu understood, she was sure of it. Theia was Praeis's daughter and more than that. She was Resaime's sister and Armetrethe's niece and the child of the colonies. She was herself, and she was no sound this world had ever heard before. As such, she might do things the world had never seen before, things Vaier Byu wanted done for the sake of her people, for the sake of her sisters who stood beside her.

  “No,” said Vaier Byu to her sister.

  “She dares!” grated Ueani through her teeth.

  “She dares show us a way to regain ourselves,” said Vaier in a quiet, even voice. “And I will not permit even you, Sister, to shut that gate on us again.”

  Mother leaned heavily against Theia. “Enough? Enough?”

  “Yes, Mother,” said Theia softly. “It was enough. You did it.”

  “We did it,” whispered Praeis Shin. Her eyes grew soft and distant. “We did. We did. We.”

  Epilogue

  The trial of Bioverse Inc. vs. Arron Hagopian was brief and to the point. Arron Hagopian, you are accused of paying to violate the integrity of the Bioverse private communications web, how do you plead? Guilty. I did give Bao Cabal six thousand shares of the First Banking Enclave of Earth in exchange for his agreement to provide me with secured information from the Bioverse communications web, which I knew he did not have the right to access or distribute. Is anyone willing to speak for the defendant? Dr. Lynn Nussbaumer was, citing Arron Hagopian's willingness to exert himself on behalf of Bioverse personnel and to ultimately assist in ensuring the success of the Dedelphi project. Security Chief Enrique Keale was, testifying to the fact that the web had not been damaged, that no private information had been recorded, removed, or altered from or in the private web.

  Arron Hagopian, you are nearby fined the worth of four thousand Bioverse shares at the market value as of this date and time, to pay for the estimated time expended by Bioverse employees in dealing with your infraction, including all court fees. Payment plan to be negotiated between yourself and/or your representatives and the Bioverse cashier's department. Dismissed.

  Now, Arron sat in his borrowed, hexagonal room with its bland, comfortable furniture, full-spectrum light and minutely controlled environment, idly threading through the web to catch up on the news and politics of the Solar system and wondering if there was any kind of job available that would allow him to pay off his debt before he had to leave it to his heirs/assignees/executors.

  Should hywrite the family and let them know I'm coming back into shouting distance. He looked at the screen. God Almighty, what they're going to have to say about this.

  The room voice cut across his thoughts. “Dr. Lynn Nussbaumer is waiting outside and asks to see you.”

  “Room voice, open the door.” Arron swiveled his chair around, grateful for the distraction.

  All Lynn's wounds had healed. She had a new right eye that precisely matched her left one. There was only a little stiffness left in her cheek to betray the fact that she'd ever been hurt. She was clean and clean-shaven and wearing a loose burgundy skirt and white tunic.

  “Hi,” she said, a little uncertainly. “I just wanted to see how you were doing.”

  “I'm fine. Would you like to sit down?” He gestured toward one of the perfectly ergonomic chairs scattered tastefully around the room.

  “Thanks.” She perched on the edge of the seat, defying all its ergonomic potential. Something in that sight made him smile inwardly.

  “How are you doing?” He sank back into the chair in front of the comm station. “What's happening with…” He found he wasn't quite sure how to refer to the fact that Lynn had given the Dedelphi the contingency plans, which they were now dangling over Bioverse's collective head with sobering results.

  Lynn gave him a half smile. “The investigation into who obtained a copy of the contingency plans is ongoing,” she said. “The chief of security is taking charge of it himself.”

  “Ah.” Arron nodded. Then, he said, “You look tired.”

  She rubbed her scalp. She had about three centimeters of auburn stubble covering her scalp. “I've just been planetside to see Praeis. She's gone through the Change.”

  Arron murmured sympathetically. “That's hard.”

  Lynn watched herself rub her palms together. “I think she recognized me.”

  “Sometimes they get flashes, if they have really strong, long-term memories about a person.”

  “That's what David said.” She glanced up at him. “I'm not sure whether that's a good thing in this case.” She shook her head. “I keep wishing I'd had a chance to, I don't know, say good-bye while she could still hear me.”

  “Theia heard you, I'm sure,” Arron said, more or less automatically. If Lynn was looking for comfort, he'd try to give it, of course, but he didn't have much left. Surely she had to see that.

  “Yeah, she did. She's going to be all right. They've put her on the Council of True Blood, and you know what? I think the other Councilors are a little afraid of her.”

  Arron raised his brows. “That could be a double-edged sword.”

  “I know, but I think she's going to handle it. She's already spent most of her annual budget sending for half of Crater Town to come in and help. The Confederation squawked, but then she pointed out how much better they'd feel with more than one person around who knew how to work with the Humans’ communication web.”

  Arron nodded in agreement that this was indeed a smart move. Maybe it was his silence that made Lynn really look at him.

  “Are your… friends going to Crater Town, then?”

  Arron nodded. “I don't know what you and Theia said to the town council or the Bioverse seniors, but they're all being allowed in. Apparently a new hole's being developed, and if they're willing to shoulder the work, they can have most of it.”

  “Are you going with them?” asked Lynn softly.

  Arron spread his hands. “What else am I going to do? They're my sisters.”

  Lynn opened her mouth and shut it again. “Of course.”

  He wasn't sure whether she meant it or not, but the fact that she wasn't going to argue the point made him feel a bit better. “Is Bioverse going to make a noise over what happened?”

  Lynn shook her head. “Surprisingly, no. They got the ship back, mostly intact. The troublemakers are going away.
The Sisters-Chosen-to-Lead have convinced everyone they really didn't know what was going on.” They exchanged a glance over that one, but neither of them said anything. “Besides which, the Confederation has quietly said they'd rather a noise not be made over it, and Bioverse is very sensitive to what the Confederation says these days.”

  Arron felt himself smile. “I should think so.”

  They looked at each other. He saw that Lynn still had dark rings under her eyes and felt the weariness that still weighed down his own muscles.

  Lynn must have been thinking something similar. She gave him a wry grin. “We should be cheering, Arron. We both won.”

  “Yeah, we did.” He rubbed his forearm. “I just hope the Dedelphi won with us.”

  Lynn shrugged. “We'll find out.” She paused. “When are you leaving?”

  “Not until tomorrow. There's a delay while Keale makes sure everybody is reregistered and ID'd under their proper names.”

  Her tone grew tentative. “I was wondering if you'd like to come have dinner with me and David?”

  Arron started. He chided himself for being so surprised, even while he said, “Are you sure?”

  Lynn nodded. “I want us to be friends again, Arron.” She leaned forward. “Come meet my partner. Come sit on my couch and drink microbrew and have stupid arguments with me. Don't leave me in silence for another ten years.”

  He smiled, a real smile this time, reflecting the warmth he felt in his veins. “I won't, Lynn. Not again.”

  She stood up and so did he, and she took his arm, Dedelphi-style. “Come on then, Sister.”

  Afterword

  “We are tired of fighting. We don't want to kill anymore. But the others are treacherous and cannot be trusted.”

  —Edward O. Wilson, On Human Nature

  When creating any culture in a work of science fiction, the author is repeatedly forced to ask the question, “How did it get this way?” When I created the Dedelphi, one of the many “its” I had to think about was their violence.

  Violence is a complex issue. It exists on many levels, from the interpersonal to intergroup to international. Its origins are a mix of genetic predisposition, environmental and cultural reinforcement, and personal conscious choice.