by Sherri Hayes
Once her head began to clear, Gabby knew she was in trouble. As much as she feared being hurt again, she wasn’t sure if she could resist Jax. Not for long anyway. Every cell in her being responded to him.
She finished washing up and took her time getting dressed. Giving in would be so easy. But was that what was best for her and Taylor? He said he wouldn’t leave again, but could she trust that? Would she ever be able to trust him?
The problem was she didn’t know the answer to any of those questions. She wanted him, yes. That didn’t mean, however, that opening her heart to him was a good idea.
But what was the alternative? Continue how they’d been? He was right about the way they’d been tiptoeing around each other. At the moment Taylor was too young to pick up on it, but sooner or later she’d be able to figure out something wasn’t right between her parents. What then?
She ran a brush through her hair as she blew it dry with the hair dryer. It was a mindless task, which was good. She needed all her mental energy to figure out what she was going to do about Jax.
The more she thought about it, the more she realized there was only one thing she could do. She was going to have to give him the chance he’d asked for. It scared her more than anything had in her life except giving birth to her daughter. That had turned out to be one of the best things to ever happen to her. She could only hope this thing with Jax turned out the same.
Her hair mostly dry, she put everything away and opened the door. She halted when she saw Jax a few feet away, leaning against the opposite wall.
Gabby opened her mouth to ask him what he was doing standing there when she got a look at his eyes. His stance might have been casual, but his eyes told a different story. She lowered her gaze to his crotch and sure enough she could see the bulge of his erection.
Before she could find her words, he spoke, his voice husky and full of lust. “I heard you scream and thought you needed help.”
Her eyes went wide and her heart rate skyrocketed. She knew she was in trouble. Big, big trouble.
***
Jax watched the range of emotions fly across Gabby’s face. She sucked in a lungful of air, causing her breasts to rise and fall. The sweater she was wearing did little to lessen the impact to his libido. He knew what was underneath the thick fabric.
Her lips parted and her tongue darted out to run along her bottom lip before disappearing back inside her mouth. He swallowed, trying to hold on to his resolve to give her the space she’d asked for. It wasn’t easy, but he held his ground.
That was until she launched herself at him. She took hold of his face, pulling it down until her lips covered his. It took him a moment to catch up to the change, but when he did he held nothing back. He wrapped his arms around her, crushing her against him as he devoured her mouth.
Gabby pressed against him, pushing his weight into the wall. There was an almost frantic feeling to her kiss . . . a desperation. As much as he loved her enthusiasm, he didn’t want her to end up regretting it like she had last night.
He ripped his mouth free for a second. “Gabby.”
She kissed him again, dipping her tongue into his mouth. It would be so easy to forget his worries and go with it, but he didn’t just want to lose himself in her body. She was more important to him than a moment of pleasure.
“I don’t,” he said between kisses. “Want. You. To. Regret.”
Gabby stopped and met his gaze. He could see the hunger in her eyes, the want. But that had never been the problem. For either of them. He’d wanted her from the first moment he saw her and it had been the same for her. He doubted that would ever change. “I won’t regret it.”
“You said that last time and—”
She placed two fingers over his lips. “I promise I won’t go hide in the bathroom after.” Her gaze went to his lips. “I promise we’ll talk. Later.” She looked up at him again. “Right now I need you. There is only so much a showerhead can do.”
His cock pulsed at the image she’d presented, the sound of her scream still fresh in his mind. He cupped her ass with the palm of his left hand and her breast with the other.
Gabby arched her back, thrusting her breast farther into his hand.
He couldn’t resist such a temptation. Lowering his mouth, he moaned as their lips connected once more. She stood on her tiptoes and lifted her leg to wrap around his hip, seeking the friction she desired.
They kissed until he couldn’t stand it anymore. He needed to touch her bare skin, to feel her warmth without her clothes blocking his access.
“What do you want?” he asked.
Never one to shy away from expressing her feelings, Gabby answered him. “I want you to use your mouth to make me come.” Then she said something that was sure to make what little room he had in his jeans disappear. “That’s what I was thinking about in the shower. You between my legs. The way your tongue—”
She yelped as he kissed her hard, cutting her off, and then picked her up and carried her into her bedroom. He laid her down on the bed and immediately reached for the button on her pants.
Gabby giggled as he lowered her zipper and worked the jeans down her legs. He dropped them on the floor and went to work on ridding her of the panties. It was then she seemed to decide to help speed up the process. She reached for the hem of her sweater and shimmied it up her torso and over her head.
Spreading her legs, Jax settled himself between them and let her scent fill his lungs. He met her gaze and held it as he ran his tongue along her pussy. “You’re so beautiful like this. All spread out for me.” He took another long lick, savoring her flavor.
As he continued to feast on her, she closed her eyes and tilted her head back. Gabby arched her back and placed her hand on top of his head, encouraging him. She didn’t have to worry. He had no desire to stop.
The last time he’d been in that position was shortly before she’d given birth to Taylor. Her contractions had started, but they weren’t close enough together to warrant going to the hospital yet. He remembered feeling helpless and needing to do something to help her. It had started out with him massaging her back and belly. Then she’d mentioned reading something about sex helping move labor along. He’d been hesitant, but as time passed and her contractions continued, he thought of a compromise that ended up being exactly what they’d both needed.
“Please.” She dug her fingernails into his scalp, urging him on.
“Are you getting close, baby?”
“Uh-huh.” Jax thought he saw her nod, but he couldn’t be sure. He was too focused on what he was doing.
A few more circles around her clit and she was teetering on the edge. Her breathing was labored and he could feel a slight tremor in her legs.
“That’s it. Let go. Come for me, Gabby. I want to hear you. Don’t hold back.” He flattened his tongue over her clit, took a long lick, and then sucked it into his mouth.
She inhaled a lungful of air and pushed his head toward her body, begging him not to let up on his assault.
Jax couldn’t help but smile. He thrust two fingers inside her, putting pressure right where she liked it. The low moan coming from her throat let him know he’d hit the correct spot.
“Jax?”
He sucked harder. Added a little more pressure.
“Jax!”
The walls of her pussy pulsed around his fingers as they coated him with moisture. He eased up on her clit, softly bringing her down from her high.
Jax removed his fingers and placed them into his mouth. She tasted amazing and she looked amazing lying there, her skin flushed a lovely pink color as she worked to slow her breathing.
Her gaze followed his movements, watching him lick the evidence of her orgasm. “Watching you do that is such a turn-on.”
He chuckled and eased himself on top of her, bringing his face level with hers. “You like that, do you?”
She circled her arms around his neck, pulling his mouth down for a kiss. “Yes.”
Since mee
ting Gabby, he’d learned that she didn’t hold back once she decided to go after something. It didn’t matter if it was in life or in the bedroom. She probed his mouth, exploring and tasting herself on his tongue. He deepened the kiss, encouraging her to continue her search.
“You’re wearing too many clothes,” she murmured against his lips. Snaking her hands between them, she began pulling at the hem of his sweater.
Jax sat up and removed the offending piece of material. “So are you.”
“I’m naked except for my bra.”
“Exactly.”
Gabby rolled her eyes but turned to one side so he could unhook her bra. She tossed it aside, leaving her without a stitch of clothing. “Satisfied?”
A wicked look crossed his face. “Not yet.”
It took some maneuvering, but he kicked his shoes, socks, and pants off before returning to hover over her. “Please tell me you have condoms somewhere. I used the only one I had last night.”
She turned her head to look at her nightstand and lifted her chin. “Top drawer.”
When he opened the drawer, he found a small box of condoms. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw they’d never been opened.
Gabby helped him push his boxers down his legs and out of the way. Before he was able to get the condom out of the wrapper, she took hold of his cock and began moving her hand from base to tip. He grabbed the back of her neck and kissed her hard, pumping his hips into her hand.
The head of his erection bumped her opening and Jax knew he needed to get the condom on before they both ended up losing their heads. As much as he would love to have another child someday, he doubted Gabby was ready for that. He wasn’t even sure they were a couple at this point and he didn’t want to add to their issues. They had enough obstacles to overcome as it was.
He nudged her hand away and rolled the condom over his erection. Once it was in place, he wasted no time. He lined himself up with her entrance and let his cock sink into her warmth.
“Kiss me,” Gabby demanded as his cock was swallowed up by her pussy.
Thrusting his hips forward, he lowered himself down, covering her body with his as he brought their lips together. They moved, connected like that. It was so much more than finding pleasure in each other. There had always been so much more with Gabby.
His feelings for her overwhelmed him until he couldn’t contain them anymore. “I love you. I always have. I never stopped.”
She cupped the side of his face, staring into his eyes. “I love you, too. I never stopped.”
There was a charge in the air around them that went beyond the physical and neither one seemed to be able to look away. They continued to move the lower halves of their bodies, their rhythm increasing as the sensations built within them.
When he could tell she was getting close, he lowered his right hand and placed it on her hip. He found her clit with his thumb and began to massage it in time with their thrusts.
A few minutes later she was falling apart in his arms, and he followed her soon after.
Chapter 8
Jax held his breath as he eased off Gabby, removed the condom, and threw it in the small trash can she kept near her bed. Even though she’d said she wouldn’t regret it afterward, he had his doubts. But instead of racing off to the bathroom like she had the night before, Gabby rolled over to face him.
“You okay?” he asked when she didn’t say anything.
“Thinking.”
He flipped to his side so he could see better. “About?”
“Us.”
The one word back and forth wasn’t really getting them anywhere, so he decided to take a different tack. “Are you having second thoughts about—”
“No.” She averted her eyes, looking off into the distance. “I meant what I said before.”
Not liking the separation, he reached for her hand and laced their fingers together.
She returned her gaze to him. “I’m still hurt you didn’t talk to me before you left. That you didn’t tell me—”
“I know. I can’t tell you how sor—”
“Let me finish.”
“Sorry.” Jax shut up and let her talk.
“As much as I might hate to admit it, this thing between us never went away. And I’m not sure it ever will. I will probably love you until the day I die. Maybe longer than that.” She sighed. “I know that might sound pathetic to some, given the circumstances, but there it is. I’m tired of fighting it.”
“So does that mean you want to give us another shot?”
Gabby was quiet for a long moment. “Yes.”
He leaned in to kiss her, but she pulled back. The hope that had been blooming in his chest was replaced with anxiety.
“No more secrets.”
“I promise.”
He went in again for that kiss, but once more she thwarted him. “I mean it.”
“I know.” He cupped the back of her head with his free hand. “I promise to be a good boy from now on.”
She giggled and playfully pushed at his chest as his mouth descended upon hers.
By the time their lips separated, they’d inched their way closer to each other until their bodies were intertwined once more. One of his arms was cradling the back of her head while he had the other hand holding on to one of her ass cheeks. Maybe it wasn’t the best position to have this type of conversation, but he had no desire to release her. Not after all this time.
“I missed you,” she whispered. “I missed this.”
“I won’t leave you again.”
“You better not. I might have to take drastic measures.”
He ran his hand up her back and down again. “Understood.”
They lay there touching for several minutes before she spoke again. “I don’t think we should tell Taylor yet. I don’t want to get her hopes up.”
Her words hit him like a kick in the gut. “You don’t think it will work between us?”
“You hurt me, Jax.” Her words did nothing to help the pain in his belly. “I’m willing to give you another chance, but I need some time.”
That wasn’t what he wanted to hear, but he couldn’t say he blamed her. It was his fault they were in this position, after all. If not for his leaving, they would most likely be married by now and Taylor might even have a brother or sister.
He glanced down at their naked bodies and back to her, raising one eyebrow. “So you’re saying you want to take it slow?”
“Not exactly.” She sighed. “I just don’t want to jump in where we left off.”
It was then he got it. “You don’t want me to move back in.”
Gabby hesitated. “I think we need to maybe test the waters first.”
“So you want to date.” It wasn’t really a question. Besides, if he was wrong, he knew she’d correct him.
She didn’t. “I think that would be the smart thing to do.”
As much as he didn’t want to take it slow, he understood where she was coming from. “Okay. We’ll date.”
A look of pure relief crossed her face and she sagged against him. “Thank you.”
He tucked her head beneath his chin and cuddled her close. “Whatever you need, Gabby. I’m just grateful you’re giving me another chance. I’ll make it up to you. I swear I will.”
“I’m going to hold you to that,” she mumbled against his chest before she yawned.
“Tired?”
“Very. I didn’t get much sleep last night.”
He turned onto his back, taking her with him. Gabby laid her head above his chest and rested her hand on his stomach. “Sleep. We can talk more later.”
“It’s okay. I’m used to functioning on little to no sleep.”
Jax pressed his lips to the top of her head. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there to help you with Taylor.”
She let out a little hum. “You help now. I’ve gotten more writing done in the last month than I had the previous six.”
“Doesn’t make up for the times I wasn’t there.”
He trailed his fingers up and down her arm, enjoying being able to touch her freely. “Did you ever get anything published?”
He felt her nod. “Two, actually. The one I’m working on now will be number three.”
“That’s amazing, Gabby.”
“Thanks.”
She yawned again and he knew he should let her sleep. There would be time later. If the news stations were to be believed, he wasn’t going anywhere until tomorrow.
“Jax?”
“Yes?” He hated to admit it, but his own lack of sleep was catching up to him. It was getting difficult to keep his eyes open.
“Did you—” She paused. “Did you date anyone when you were gone?”
That woke him up a little. He figured the topic would come up eventually, but he hadn’t been prepared for it so soon. “No. No one.”
She didn’t comment.
The longer he lay there, the more he wondered if she had dated anyone. He had been gone three years and she was a beautiful woman. It wasn’t something he wanted to think about, but given she’d brought it up . . . “What about you? Did you date anyone?”
He held his breath waiting for her to answer.
“I went on two dates with two different men.”
Jax thought about the condoms in the drawer and reminded himself they hadn’t been opened. As much as he wanted to ask her more, he didn’t feel as if it was the right time.
She didn’t seem to feel the same way. “They were both nice men. Polite. Handsome. And when I told them about Taylor they didn’t get up and run in the other direction.”
He was waiting for a but.
“At the end of the date they both asked to see me again, but I couldn’t do it. My heart wasn’t in it and I knew it wouldn’t be fair to them if I let it continue.”
The silence dragged on and he wondered if she was finished.
“You ruined me for other men.”
The pattern his fingers had been making on her skin stopped. He shifted his position so he could look her in the eye. Tipping her chin up, he made sure she met his gaze. “It seems we had the same problem. I made a friend in physical therapy. He tried to fix me up a few times and I turned him down every time every time.” Jax shook his head. “I couldn’t imagine myself with anyone but you and, at the time, I thought I’d ruined our relationship beyond all repair.”