the banks have shut their doors
internal collapse, one after the other
just like before. Only they have done it again
Dana
they were fine yesterday
Librarian
they were teetering yesterday. They weren’t fine yesterday. If you read the small print, the detail of what was going on
look do you want these books or not?
Dana takes the books.
Librarian
don’t bother to thank me
Dana
thank you.
She looks at the books. There are quite a few.
will the bank be open tomorrow?
Librarian
unlikely, did you hear what I said?
Dana
so, what? Is there a hotel we can stay in for the night?
Librarian
out the library, turn left. Metropole Street. Probably listed in the guidebook under places to particularly avoid but there isn’t another one. Don’t eat the breakfast, sleep with the lights on. Don’t use the bath unless you are carrying disinfectant with you.
Dana
why are you looking after me?
Librarian
I’m not.
I’m looking after me.
Dana
where am I headed?
Librarian
don’t ask.
ELEVEN
The hotel in Hartenharten.
Dana and Jasmine stand in their hotel room with their suitcase.
Jasmine
I knew we should have got a plane.
Beat.
Dana
it’s not bad
Jasmine
it’s not good
Dana
it’s a bit cold.
Jasmine
it’s fucking freezing.
one night?
Dana
yes
one night
Jasmine
it’s so cold I can feel my bones
Dana
there must be some heating.
Jasmine
the windows don’t even shut
Dana
we’ll stuff them with clothes.
Beat.
it’s just one night.
Jasmine
I know
Dana
I agree it’s not great, is that a heater?
Jasmine
I think it was.
Dana
sit down I’ll put the kettle on.
Jasmine sits down.
Jasmine
you know I’m crap at the cold
Dana
you’ll be fine
Jasmine
there is cold and there is cold.
what if we wake up and we are frozen?
Dana
you’ve got the baby to keep you warm
Jasmine
poor ice-covered little thing
Dana
maybe you should stay with the suitcase and I’ll go and look for the bank
Jasmine
you just looked for a bank
Dana
well there must be another bank.
OK so one shut their doors but there must be another one.
they are all connected.
Jasmine
I live in the real world, Dana. They shut their doors they shut their doors. I thought it wasn’t supposed to happen again.
Beat.
Dana
tea?
Jasmine
yes please.
Dana starts the kettle.
Dana
that will warm you up.
oh fuck, the kettle doesn’t work
Jasmine
Jesus.
Beat.
no one loses all their money overnight, do they?
Dana
I guess not
Jasmine
there are regulations for this kind of thing, when banks close, people are OK?
Dana
yes or they have been in the past
Jasmine
exactly everyone was OK last time, weren’t they? The countries were screwed but the individuals were OK.
Dana
I guess so
Jasmine
so we’ll be fine then –
Dana
I need to get to Alexandria for Monday
Jasmine
so there are the big things like whether we have just been bankrupted and then there are the small things like whether we can get to Alexandria for Monday
Dana
it isn’t a small thing
Jasmine
no but it isn’t like losing all one’s savings.
Dana
you’ve got the car
Jasmine
yes if we can get home, I’ve got the car.
Dana
I need to get to Alexandria, without this grant –
Jasmine
you’ll get to Alexandria
we have what, forty-eight hours, we could walk if we have to.
Dana
hardly
Jasmine
it’s a setback, yes.
we are temporarily suspended.
do you think we are going to actually be able to sleep here?
I mean I don’t want to be fussy but
oh fucking hell
Beat.
She takes a deep breath.
what we need is an embassy. We’re Europeans. We’ll go to the embassy tomorrow and tell them what has happened, OK? This sort of thing happens, all the time. No one actually loses money. They sort it
Dana
and in the meantime?
Jasmine
there is no meantime, this will be sorted. bit of a pisser that we have to stay here tonight, but basically –
Dana
what will we eat?
Jasmine
what?
Dana
aren’t you hungry?
we haven’t eaten anything since lunch
Jasmine
do you have to always turn to the problems?
Dana
we need to eat something don’t we?
you are pregnant
Jasmine
and we will eat, we’ll eat food
Dana
you spent all our euros on that stupid ticket, and we haven’t even paid for this room –
Jasmine
when we go to the embassy we will explain we need some petty cash to tide us over. We won’t be the only people in this boat. I told you.
Dana
there isn’t an embassy
Jasmine
there’ll be one in the next town
Dana
that’s quite a walk
Jasmine
we’ll ring ahead. Make an appointment, then when we get there they’ll give us a temporary chequebook or something. A small amount of money. We’ll go to the top of the queue because of the baby
Dana
I’ve got the bread from lunch
Jasmine
there you are then
we’re fine
Dana
tomorrow is a Saturday
the embassy won’t be open on a Saturday
and the next day is Sunday
Jasmine
we’ll go Monday
Dana
I have to be in Alexandria on Monday
Jasmine
well, maybe in an emergency they will open the embassy even on a Saturday. I think this is an emergency, don’t you? All the major banks in Europe folding at once.
there’ll be a number. An information sheet. someone will be printing up an information sheet and delivering them to all the hotels right now.
Dana
OK.
Jasmine
even in Hartenharten
the information sheets will get through.
Beat.
have you got any other food? Other than the bread?
Dana
Jasmine
not specifically for tomorrow, I just wanted to know
Dana
I feel a bit hungry now
Jasmine
that’s the panic
you can’t panic in a situation like this
Dana
what if we get really hungry in the night and we want to eat all the food?
Jasmine
I’m through that, I told you
Dana
you’re pregnant, anything could happen
Jasmine
don’t turn this into I am the one who is fucking it up
Dana
OK calm down
Jasmine
if one of us wakes up in the night and eats all the food it will be a bit of a bugger, but not a disaster because we are both well-nourished and even a pregnant woman can walk to the embassy in the next town with no breakfast.
Dana
OK
Jasmine
OK
what else have you got?
Dana
not much
couple of bananas I think
some emergency contraception
some chocolate
Jasmine
there you are then – riches. I bet you could live on a packet of wine gums for a week if you had to.
Dana gets it out.
Dana
why are you so calm?
Jasmine
because we live in Europe, because nothing really bad happens. We both have jobs, the worst of this is, is a bit of an inconvenience and perhaps not such a good mini-break but really in the grand scheme of life, not so bad.
Dana
my phone is about to run out of charge
Jasmine
so charge it
Dana
I forgot the charger
Jasmine
what?
Dana
well, we packed in a hurry. If we had a week to make lists and think about the sort of things we might need it’s normally you that remembers things like a charger
Jasmine
alright, when we get things sorted out, we’ll get a charger
Dana
perfect
Jasmine
we have plenty of money after all. All our inheritance plus savings.
this is just a temporary situation.
you are the one that knows about customer relations.
There will be a number to call, won’t there?
Dana
probably.
Jasmine
some way that the bank will have of smoothing this over
Dana
if the bank is bust, technically it won’t be the bank
Jasmine
alright, whoever’s job it is to make this OK. They will make it smooth.
Dana
that fucking demon
Jasmine
I’m tired
I’m so fucking tired. Please.
we’ve been travelling all day
Beat.
Dana
you’re tired of me
Jasmine
I’m tired of this.
I’m tired generally, but yes, I am tired of you.
do you mind if I go to sleep?
Dana
I’m sorry
Jasmine
aren’t you tired?
I know the beds are crap and the room like the Arctic but
Dana
I’m not pregnant
Jasmine
lucky you.
Jasmine starts to go to sleep.
Dana stays up.
She turns down the light.
Dana
goodnight.
I love you.
Jasmine
love you too.
Dana
I’m sorry
Jasmine
don’t be sorry, it’s a fucking adventure.
we’ll laugh one day.
Dana
very funny
Jasmine
we will.
when this child is born, we’ll tell it about this hideous place we came to on the way to Alexandria
Dana
when this child is born?
Jasmine
yes, right before you got the most amazing job
Dana
and right before you and the baby came out with me to live in Alexandria,
Jasmine
and right before we got this really nice flat because you became a professor, and we’ll tell the baby, that life was pretty OK but we did have to spend one night in a fridge.
Dana
it will laugh and ask how can you live in a fridge when a fridge is so small
Jasmine
ah, OK, we’ll go not literally a fridge but a room that was so cold you could see the ice forming
Dana
you should have been a poet
Jasmine
fuck off I’m going to sleep
Dana
that sounds nice by the way
Jasmine
what does?
Dana
talking to your baby.
when it’s born
Jasmine
goodnight.
Dana
goodnight.
Dana looks around.
She opens her shirt and looks at the hicky.
She puts her hand up to it, it’s sore to touch now.
All over her breast.
She turns round, it’s all over her back too.
She takes a scrubbing brush to it.
TWELVE
Dana is in the bath.
The water is cold, but she doesn’t notice.
In the bath with her is the demon.
He is sitting behind her and scrubbing her back.
Dana
surprise surprise
Jarron
what does that mean?
Dana
I knew you wouldn’t stay away
Jarron
you’re imagining me
Dana
whatever you say
Jarron
I’m a version in your head
Dana
OK by me.
Jarron
a weird version as it turns out
not quite me at full force
I would never get into a bath with a girl
He gets out of the bath and starts drying himself with a towel.
Jarron
what do you want?
Dana
I don’t want anything
Jarron
so why am I here?
Dana
you brought yourself
Jarron
in your dreams
Dana
alright, I want to know why you are doing this?
I mean I know what you are trying to do, I just want you to say it
Jarron
you think I did this?
Dana
didn’t you?
Jarron
what does your sister say?
Dana
she didn’t meet you
Jarron
just take the damn thing, then it wouldn’t really matter what the banks were doing, you could get to where you need to go
Dana
we’ve been through this.
Jarron
a nice 45-euro-worth hamper of food
Dana
no thank you
Jarron
think of your sister
pregnant after all. That poor little baby
Dana
my sister has nothing to do with it
Jarron
and freezing cold
how about a radiator, or a hot-water bottle to put at her feet?
Dana
this is between you and me
you keep her out of it
Jarron
I am a demon, I don’t have any morals, any boundaries. I can go sideways I can go up I can go down. I can punish yo
ur great-granddaughter for this, or your aged ancestor.
it’s all a bit silly isn’t it, for a principle? For pride?
for your ego, for putting yourself first.
you can name your price, if crisp banknotes aren’t your thing
two return tickets to Alexandria
Dana
we’ll get to Alexandria
Jarron
you need that job
Berlin is more or less collapsing
Europe is in the shit
Dana
Europe will pull together
Jarron
we’ll see
Dana
are you going to kill me?
Jarron
I am doing nothing
I might do something about the temperature, aren’t you cold?
Dana
this on my neck
Jarron
what about it?
Dana
what is it?
Jarron
it’s nothing
Dana
why is it growing?
He shrugs.
Jarron
maybe you should go to a doctor
Dana
you put it there so that I would have to come back to you
so I would come and find you
Jarron
here’s the thing: I don’t care
Dana
so you keep saying
Jarron
I care nothing about you
if I did before, it’s gone now
Dana
so why are you here?
Jarron
I’m not.
Pause.
They look at each other.
He shrugs and looks at her again.
I’m not
He can’t quite break away though. They stare at each other.
They are almost irresistibly drawn to each other.
Then the moment is broken.
Some music starts up in the background.
Jarron
what is that?
Dana
the next-door room
Jarron
can’t you stop it?
Dana
probably not
Jarron
can’t you ring down and get them to shut up?
Dana
what’s wrong with it?
Jarron
it’s music, it’s fucking music
Dana
what is wrong with music?
Jarron
I don’t like it, it plays with my head
Dana
you are by the telephone –
Jarron
alright
He picks up the telephone.
How to Hold Your Breath Page 5