Forbidden (The Gabriel Lennox Series Book 1)

by M. L. Desir

  Charlie just looked at him, while a long, pale hand rose to his throat, then to his head. His brown eyes screwed up to the sky darkening to the color of ashes. “Butterflies? I don’t recall that . . . it’s late. I shall be scolded. Mummy hates when I’m late.”

  He sat up, and Gabriel offered his hand. He pulled the boy to his feet and patted him on the head.

  “Thank you, sir, but where’s my net?” Charlie’s brown eyes darted along the field. “Daddy despises when I lose things. He shan’t give me another, either.”

  Nathaniel stooped to one knee, came up with empty hands, and shrugged. “I’m certain your mother and father will buy you a new one …”

  Gabriel leaned over so that he stood closer to Charlie’s eye level. “Now remember, Charlie. You had a terrible fall while chasing butterflies. That is what you will tell your parents, right?”

  Charlie’s brown eyes glazed over. His head bobbed slowly up and down. “Yes, I had a terrible fall,” he mumbled. “While chasing butterflies.”

  Gabriel smiled, his eyes unblinking. “Good. Now off with you!”

  Charlie dashed through the weeds without glancing back.

  “Amazing,” Colin gushed, clapping his hands. “How ever did you do that, Master Gabriel? I mean, I knew that you could, but seeing truly is believing!”

  “I simply breathed into him, Colin, nothing more.” Gabriel made his way back to the house, Colin half skipping, half running after him.

  “Like God breathed into Adam? You call that simple?” he asked.

  Gabriel sighed. “Believe what you want.”

  “And how did you get him to leave so quickly and without any question of what took place?”

  “You’ve heard of snake charmers, Colin,” Nathaniel said. “Well, Gabriel can charm humans with his emerald eyes and silvery voice.”

  Once back in the house, Gabriel sat down in the parlor near the fireplace. He told Colin to bring him a bottle of red wine. No glasses.

  Colin returned five minutes later, and Nathaniel tagged along behind him. He handed the hourglass-shaped bottle out to Gabriel, already uncorked. Droplets of water dripped from it. Gabriel took it, and the coolness on his flesh felt wonderful. He drank a long drink from the bottle. “Thank you, Colin. You may go.”

  Instead of leaving, Colin shook his head in defiance and moved toward him, combing his fingers through the curls of his blonde hair. He grabbed Gabriel’s free hand and held it tight. “Master Gabriel, make me,” Colin said, “like you are.” He undid the first three buttons of his shirt and loosened the narrow tie.

  Nathaniel sat next to Gabriel in one of the chairs. “Would you like me to do it for you? After all, it was I who promised him.”

  Gabriel dismissed his offer with a wave of his hand. “I’m thirsty. I’ll give Colin what he wants.” He stood up, held him by the shoulders, and Colin closed his eyes. “Forget about heaven, Colin. There’s only now. Now is all you have, and now is a lot longer than you think it is,” he whispered in his ear. Mikel’s words. He found it strange that he actually repeated them word for word.

  Colin was considerably shorter, so Gabriel had to bend a little more and lean in slightly before biting into his neck. A tiny gasp escaped from the boy as Gabriel tore his flesh with his teeth. As he drank his blood, Colin’s strange words didn’t sound so strange anymore: We’re all just rott’n, stinkin’ corpses. All of us just poor dead creatures. But you could change that . . .

  * * *

  The evening sky brimmed with the fullness of the moon. Like a hungry white hole, it sucked up the light of the stars. Colin sat on the portico outside, listening. Within three days, weeds had already begun to prey on the garden. Their presence, though unwanted, reassured him that he had indeed been sleeping. It had rained, too, and the early cold mornings had chilled some of the buds, stealing their tender, lovely lives too soon.

  Colin stretched out his fingers before him, and at will, flames appeared and flickered like rose petals from his fingertips. “Young one, I bestow to you fire-letting, a priceless technique for your servitude to Gabriel,” the god-man in white had told him in one of his dreams. Colin remembered his eyes. Peculiar eyes, the color of a clear sunset filled with violet and green, verging into blue.

  Colin flexed his fingers and willed the weeds to catch on fire. Tiny flames swallowed up the parasitic plants masquerading as flowers, and as they burned, they filled the night air with a cloying sweetness.

  He smiled. Burning Gabriel’s enemies would smell all the sweeter.

  CHAPTER 23

  Bela’s Request

  “WHO IS SHE?” Bela asked, later that evening.

  Gabriel just stared at her, knowing that she had spoken, but uncertain of what she meant. Why had she come?

  He assumed she had paid him a visit to talk. To confess her guilty conscience. “Seth wants to kill you.” He imagined a parody of her throwing herself at his feet and swearing undying loyalty to him. The corners of his mouth twitched into a wry smile.

  Honestly, he had no idea what she wanted to tell him. He had never been any good at reading women and their intentions. Besides, he hadn’t sent for her and had to conceal his surprise when Colin had brought her into his study. He wondered what kind of look the cabbie had given her when she stepped into his carriage alone. It must’ve been an unpleasant one because respectable ladies brought along companions.

  And ladies who traveled alone?

  Well . . .

  “Who is she?” Bela asked again. “What’s her name?”

  He drummed his fingers against the top of the desk. “She? She who?”

  She gave him an encouraging smile. “I can see it in your eyes. You’re oceans away. I know that only the thought of a woman could put such a puzzled look in any man’s eyes.”

  He frowned. “If you haven’t noticed, Bela, I’m not just any man. Why not make the obvious assumption—Seth, the murders, his challenge—as to why I’m puzzled or, more appropriately, distracted. At least that way, I’m not so damn typical.”

  She chuckled. “Seth also tries so hard to be anything but typical. How funny. How ironic that when you say such things that I’m reminded of him.”

  “Really, Bela, you’re killing the romantic atmosphere.”

  She leaned back in her chair. “No. Please be serious. That’s not why I have come.” She slid the envelope toward him across the desk. “You must listen and understand.”

  He cocked an eyebrow. “Must I?”

  She nodded.

  “Well, if I’m to listen, at least let me ask what I want to know first.” He paused, looking at her for acceptance.

  She merely smiled at him, her head cocked to the side.

  He didn’t return the smile, but drummed out another beat with his fingers. “You never told me about why Seth Enlightened you.”

  “Seth and I were childhood friends.”

  “That doesn’t explain why he Enlightened you.”

  “I was the daughter of the vicar in our village. My Enlightenment was kind of an accident.” She blushed.

  Gabriel stared at her. “You speak in jest.”

  She shook her head. “I’m serious. Quite serious. Seth thought it would be ironic if he were to Enlighten my father since he’s a priest, but that night, I heard noises, and I walked in on him. I recognized him, and when I called him by name, something inside him just snapped, and he attacked me instead.”

  “By name? What do you mean?”

  “Seth’s real name was John. John Williams. A plain name, which he hated. He hates anything plain and insignificant. My father was so shocked that Seth had become such a demonic, bloodthirsty thing—we hadn’t seen him in years and thought that he was dead—that my father . . .well, the shock of it must’ve killed him.” She sighed. “Seth thought it was funny that he had inadvertently killed a priest who should be cast
ing out demons but who, instead, was scared to death by one. He had a good laugh about it for a couple of weeks.”

  He frowned. “Hmm. The more I hear about him, the more I dislike him.”

  “At least you don’t have to live with him.”

  “No, but you think that you do?”

  She bowed her head. “I don’t have a choice.”

  “Pathetic. Of course you do, and it’s obvious that you’ve already made it.”

  “I grant you that, but there could be another choice if I had someone to champion me. That would give me hope.”

  “And that someone is me?” Gabriel opened the envelope, and a wad of money spilled out laced with a string of black pearls. “What’s this?”

  “Payment.” She leaned in toward him, and her milky white throat stained with a sudden redness seemed more kissable than ever. “I offer my body to you as well.”

  He rested his chin on his hand. “You know, fairy tales are filled with princesses. Fair princesses with gorgeous, porcelain doll faces waiting for princes and knights in shining armor to save them.” He leaned in closer until he could smell her breath tainted with the scent of mint leaves and blood. He leaned a little more so that he almost touched her nose with his and smiled. “I never did like that kind of princess.”

  She pulled away, her lips parted in disgust.

  Gabriel swallowed a laugh. What? Had she wanted him to kiss her?

  She sat back against her chair, a defiant tilt in her chin. “Should I take matters into my own hands? Is that what you’re trying to tell me?”

  “Naturally.”

  “Well, that’s why I’m here. Please give me sanctuary.”

  “No. I can’t, and I won’t.” He stood up and walked toward the door. Opening it, he called for Colin. “Please come and send Lady Bela out.”

  She shot up out of her chair. “No thank you,” she said coldly. “I’ll show myself out. I didn’t come here only for pity, though, if that’s what you’re thinking. I also came here to warn you. Those recent murders. The prostitute on Saturday and the priest on Sunday, as you know, are Seth’s doing. There’ve been several more since then. Remember the night he mentioned cleansing the world for you? Well, that was a lie.”

  He stood in the open doorway. “Never mind Colin,” he called, before shutting the door with a soft click. He wouldn’t have her leave just yet. Would she confess? If so, then perhaps he could trust her?

  She must’ve sensed his hesitation, his change of heart because she appeared inches behind him. “The night I first met you,” she said, stroking his back, “the indignation you displayed against Seth’s preying upon the humans was genuine. Your heart is pure. You’re not bloodthirsty like the rest of us. You’re so . . . different.”

  He shrugged her off. “Don’t pretend to know my heart. If you knew my heart, you would’ve left when I told you to.”

  “You can feign nonchalance all you want,” she replied. “But I can see through it. It bothers you. Scares you that he’s taking away something that you’re beginning to want, but your wanting it is noble. Righteous.” She let out a small laugh. “And admitting so shall not make it any less.”

  The ticking of the clock became louder as he hesitated, thinking of something to contradict her. But part of him wanted her to be right. He turned around to look at her. “Perhaps the world that Seth wants,” he stated in an even tone voice to provoke the truth out of her, “isn’t so horrible.”

  She clenched one of her hands into a fist. “That’s not what you should be saying. You should be more concerned with what kind of world you want to exist in, Gabriel, and take control.”

  Interesting reaction. She seemed so convincing, too, but he still didn’t feel that he could trust her. After all, she hadn’t yet admitted Seth’s plans about killing him. “These killings,” he said. “They will stop. Eventually, ennui will set upon him, and he’ll find another morbid hobby. Perhaps sticking pins in dolls.”

  She narrowed her eyes. “Please be serious.” She let out a quivering sigh. “Seth has gained followers. The murders won’t stop. They’ve become an obsession. His mother, I realized, represents the prostitute, and the priest represents my father, whose life he didn’t take wittingly. And the murder yesterday, Gabriel, was of an older man. Seth went on about how the bastard was another sacrifice to Beautiful Light. He called it a sacrifice of his past.”

  The hairs on the back of Gabriel’s neck rose. “Beautiful Light? And who is that?”

  She gave a quick shrug of her shoulders. “I’m still not sure. When I asked Seth to elaborate on that, he became enraged. Possessed. He grabbed me by the arms, and his eyes flashed something fierce. His eyes, I will never forget that for a moment, they were both the color of purest gold. He told me to never speak the name again, ranted and raved that I was unworthy to speak his name.” She fell silent and glided toward the window beside his desk. She rested her head against the pane. “His reaction only made me more curious. Perilously so. In order to get him to speak about this Beautiful Light, I enticed him with my blood. Got him drunk on it. To my horror and pleasure, it worked. In his drunken haze, Seth revealed a little about Beautiful Light. He said that he was like an angel with flowing hair and serene eyes. Beautiful Light. He Who Takes, He Who Remakes. He Who Is Ravenous.”

  Delightful epithets. “Beautiful Light, Beautiful Light,” he repeated in a whisper. He couldn’t help but shudder every time he spoke the name. “Who are you? What are you?” He shook his head, bringing himself back to his senses.

  She lifted her head and held him with an intense stare. “Don’t you understand? Seth wants to destroy everything that is and was connected to him. What he’s doing wasn’t to please you or to even displease you—it’s an excuse for him to destroy. Destruction pleases him.” She paused, wringing her hands. “I know Seth as you could never know him.”

  “Then why aren’t you there by his side soothing his beastly nature instead of lusting after me?”

  “He frightens me.” She let out another sigh and wrapped her arms around her slim waist. “I’ve heard him speaking when he’s alone, only I don’t think he’s speaking to himself. It’s as if someone or something is there, listening and talking back. I can’t explain it, but there’s an unnatural coldness during the silence.” She shivered again. “Do you think it was He? This Beautiful Light?”

  Gabriel’s whole body tensed. He pressed his back against the door for support.

  “Oh God,” she gasped. “You’ve sensed it too, haven’t you?”

  “Seth,” he said in a low voice, “is mad. Simple as that. This Beautiful Light is a symptom of his sick mind. Nothing more!” He smoothed his hair back out of his face, hands trembling.

  “No. You’re hiding something. Oh God. Oh God. What if he turns on me? You have to stop him.”

  He shrugged. “Do I?”

  She began to cry. “Please. Please. You’re the only one who can.”

  “You’re overreacting, Bela. It’s not as if Seth has changed overnight. This is how you’ve always known him to be. When you came here a few days ago, I didn’t see you shedding a tear over the victims that he claimed. Perhaps those days allowed your guilty mind to wander and to wonder ‘what if he turns his murderous and vicious attention to me?’ And you don’t want that kind of attention, eh?”

  She narrowed her eyes at him, still crying. “There’s something darker about him now. I thought that what he was doing was acceptable only because he was getting rid of people that would be a threat to us. His philosophy made sense. Remove our enemies before they can lay a finger on us. It’s different now. Now, I think he sees everyone as an enemy.”

  “Hmph. It’s more than fear that you’re beginning to feel. Guilt, yes guilt, is a powerful thing.” He walked to the opposite side of the room, watching her from a distance and crossed his arms against his chest. “You’re such a hypocrite,
Bela. Do you know how ridiculous you sound?”

  “All right, all right I deserved that,” she replied, breathless. “I admit that I was wrong. But now I’m beginning to see things in another light. You must listen, you must see the danger I’m in—”

  He smiled. “Danger? Don’t speak to me about danger. I risk not only my safety, but that of my people by opening my doors to you, child of Seth. You’re either his traitor or his ally. You can’t be both. Tell me, does Seth have murderous intentions for me?” He held his breath, eager for her reply and yet dreading it.

  She looked up at him with a flicker of silver eyes and cast them down to the floor. “None that I know of.”

  Lies. Damned, bloody lies. He felt himself become cold and hot at the same time. “Is that so?” He clenched his teeth and shut his eyes, wishing that he could make her disappear. But when he opened his eyes again, she hadn’t moved.

  She gave a small smile that made charming lines underneath her eyes. “What can I do to gain your trust, my Prince?” In one fluid motion, she stooped into a curtsy.

  “Kill Seth,” he said. “Oh, I forgot. Terror prevents you. Now go away.”

  Her bright smile darkened into a perfect scowl. “Why, why,” she stammered, “why do you treat me with such poison now? The night of the party, you had eyes only for me. Don’t even try to deny it. You wanted me and now—now—” She broke off into another chorus of sobs.

  He cut a warning hand in the air between them. “Maybe the fairy tale analogy wasn’t clear enough for you. Let me elaborate so that even you can understand. A pretty face is just a pretty face, Bela. I’m looking for more in the woman with whom I fall in love. Stop trying. You’re not her and never will be, and that’s why I won’t protect you. I can’t. I won’t.” I’m saving my heart for a girl in my dreams. At least, a dream can’t lie. I’m a sentimental fool. I must be mad, too.

  “You’re cold, Gabriel. You have a cold, stony heart, and I pray for the day that it’s warmed. I pray for the day that when you fall in love, she treats you the way you treated me.”