“Did you know Casa del Rey was my favorite?” Ashleigh was suddenly intrigued at Kellan’s savvy in procuring a reservation at the local hotspot.
“I had a suspicion.” Kellan leaned over. “I trolled your Instagram. There were a few pics of you and Shauna from not very long ago. I asked Liam just to be sure. He confirmed what social media only suggested.”
“The food is so good. Not gonna lie, part of the allure is that Reagan hates Spanish food. It’s nice knowing I won’t bump into her and Josh there.”
“Do you run into them often?”
“You’d be surprised. For the number of people that live in Brooklyn, this neighborhood feels small sometimes.”
“I bet.”
“It’s a beautiful night out.” She did a full three sixty spin and loved feeling Kellan’s eyes on her. She knew the sex would be epic the second they got back to the apartment. For an added treat, she wanted to build up the anticipation. “Feel like checking in on Liam?” she asked. “Be nice to have a drink out in his courtyard.”
“Sounds great. I bet he’d love to wish you a happy birthday too.”
“We don’t have to stay long—I promise.”
“I’m in no rush,” Kellan said. “I have you all night, right?”
She answered with a wink as they entered Connolly’s Public House. Ashleigh was thrilled to see Paul behind the main bar, knowing it meant Liam was already out back. She gave him a friendly wave as she led Kellan outside. And stopped dead.
Somebody should’ve given her a heads-up, but even if they had, there was probably no amount of mental preparation that would have readied her to see a particular party of four standing out from the crowd as they laughed and chatted at a picnic table near the back bar.
Reagan caught her eye first, but the others seemed to notice her simultaneously, a fraction of a second later. Ashleigh wanted to run as fast and as far as possible, but she couldn’t. She stood frozen in the moment and then did the unthinkable. Almost on autopilot, her legs carried her forward.
“Hey there.” She stood behind Shauna and Mike, a hand resting on each of their shoulders. She lobbed a smile at Reagan and Josh, hoping it didn’t look as painful as it felt. “Reagan, Josh.”
“Ash. Happy birthday.” Reagan was the only one with the nerve to speak, and it looked like she was about to get up and greet her. The situation felt pitiful, and in the moment, she only cared about sparing herself the awkwardness.
“Thanks. Don’t get up.” She waved her off. “We’re going to get drinks.”
“Do you guys want to sit? There’s room.” Shauna scooted over and patted the bench beside her. Ashleigh picked up on a combo of panic and apology in her expression. “Let us buy your round. For your birthday,” she added.
“It’s all good. We’ll just say hi to Liam and come back.”
It was a terrible idea and she knew it, but she felt trapped by etiquette and the fact that she shouldn’t care that her friends and their boyfriends made up a run-of-the-mill foursome plucked right out of Middle America.
She felt the heat from Kellan’s body behind her as they approached the bar and waited for Liam’s attention.
“You okay? We can leave.” Kellan’s voice was soft in her ear, her touch gentle on her back. “We do not have to stay. You don’t have to prove anything.”
“Nope. I’m fine.” She heard the tension in her voice. “No big deal. Shauna and Reagan and Josh are here. At Liam’s. Together. On my birthday. Awesome.” She felt every muscle in her body stiffen with angst. “Tequila. Immediately,” she said when Liam finally made it over.
“Ashleigh, take a deep breath. Let me make you a drink. Something you’ll like.” She watched his eyes dart past to her table of friends a few feet away.
“Liam. Tequila. Please?” she asked. She couldn’t care less about the taste. She wanted to dull the anguish and embarrassment she was feeling. She wanted the courage to face them all, even if it was manufactured. “I never ask you for anything.”
He placed two shot glasses in front of her and lifted a bottle of tequila from the top shelf.
Ashleigh knocked back the first one and asked for another immediately. With a somewhat disapproving sigh, he refilled their glasses. She winced away the burn as she felt it go down, the potent liquid warming her chest and her arms almost immediately.
“It’s actually not bad,” she said, leaning back into Kellan for contact and support. “One more. Please?” She pouted and batted her lashes at the same time. “It’s my birthday.”
“The puppy dog routine doesn’t really work for me,” he said. “You’re not my type. Do yourself a favor and let those two work their magic for a minute. Then we’ll see.”
“Do they come here a lot?” she whispered.
“First time.” He iced two glasses and loaded a silver shaker with vodka and vermouth. “Shauna and Mike come in once in a while. Reagan’s never stepped foot in here, I promise.” He gave the tin a hefty shake. “I would’ve called you. I should have.” He seemed genuinely disappointed in himself. “It’s just, I knew you went out to dinner. I didn’t think…” He filled two martini glasses and delivered them to a pair of women at the end of the bar. “For what it’s worth, Reagan seems uncomfortable as fuck. She didn’t even order a drink.”
“How long have they been here?”
“Maybe an hour.” He shrugged.
“Okay. One more for us.” She let her head fall back against Kellan’s chest, as she was beginning to feel the effects of the first two drinks. “Is that okay?” She directed her question to Kellan only. Her lips tingled and her body buzzed. She let her hand drift to the front of Kellan’s pants, even though she doubted she was packing.
“You sure?” Kellan responded with a question, but Ashleigh felt a hand circle her waist, and the expression in Kellan’s eyes seemed full of support. Ashleigh nodded.
They kicked back the final shot and Ashleigh had a brilliant idea. “Li, will you leave the bottle and give us four more glasses?”
He answered with a broad smile. “No.”
“Why not?” She giggled at his stern yet playful response.
“For one, this isn’t a movie. So easy on the leave-the-bottle nonsense.” He cleared their shot glasses. “Two, you’re getting drunk. Your eyes are already glassy.” He wiped the bar where a few errant drops of tequila made it sticky. “If you want to make nice with the straights and Reagan, I’ll mix something up and bring it over. Deal?”
“You are a fucking genius and I love you.” She reached across and pulled his face close for a kiss. Gathering her semisloshed resolve, she sauntered the few short steps and plunked down next to Shauna, squeezing in close to make room for Kellan.
“So, gang, what’s new?” She heard the forced friendliness in her tone and wondered if it was noticeable. Either way the two couples seemed in a collective state of shock at her decision to join them, and no one answered right away. Ashleigh opted to fill the silence herself. “Sorry. You all remember Kellan, right?”
Shauna nodded. “How’s the summer treating you, Kellan?”
“It’s great. New York is an amazing city.”
“What did you do to celebrate today, Ash?” Shauna was clearly the mouthpiece.
“We spent the afternoon at Hudson Yards, and we just had dinner at Casa del Rey.”
“Yum.” Shauna swatted her arm. “That’s our spot, Ash.”
“Looks like you have a few spots. Depending on who you’re with.” It was a low blow, but before Shauna could react at all, Liam was at the head of the table. He lined up seven shot glasses and poured an orangey-pink concoction in each.
“To Ash.” He lifted his shot in the air. “Thirty-eight years, baby.”
“What is it?” Josh asked.
“Kamikaze passion fruit,” Liam said.
“So vodka, right?” Josh pressed.
“Yeah, but not too strong,” Liam answered. “And kinda tasty, if I do say so myself.”
Ashleigh w
atched Reagan push her glass slightly to the side, making eye contact with her boyfriend. He nodded, seeming to assume responsibility for its consumption. She didn’t know which was more annoying—their obvious ability to communicate without words or the fact that her ex had changed everything about her persona, right down to her affinity for a good cocktail.
“You don’t drink vodka anymore?” Ashleigh asked, unable to keep the judgment from her tone.
“I’m just not feeling great,” Reagan said.
“It’s one drink. You can’t have one drink with me?”
“I really can’t.”
The table fell quiet and Ashleigh watched her friends exchange seemingly knowing looks. It hit her. A thousand seconds too late, but it hit her. With one hand, Reagan covered her belly in case she was still in the dark.
“Oh my God. You’re pregnant.”
No one said a word. They didn’t need to. Ashleigh drained her shot and turned to Shauna. “A little warning might have been okay. Just to avoid, you know”—she faux smiled at Shauna first, Reagan second—“this ridiculously awkward moment.” She reached over and grabbed Reagan’s kamikaze shot, lifting it aloft before shooting it quickly. “Congrats.” The thump the glass made against the wooden table was louder than she expected, but she couldn’t help it. She turned to Kellan. “Can we go?”
In some part of her brain she registered the objections of her friends arguing she should stay, as she gathered her purse and walked out. It all seemed like a blur. Her chest was tight, her head spun. She didn’t take a full breath until she was on Fifth Avenue, halfway down the block from Liam’s. She heard her own laughter in spite of the anger she felt over the situation. Thank God Kellan was there.
She pushed into her and found her lips immediately, kissing her hard, if a tad sloppily. Kellan held her tight but pulled back to assess her. “Are you okay?”
“Yes, I’m okay.” Ashleigh wrapped her arms around Kellan’s shoulders and reached up to kiss her neck. “I just need you to take me home and make me forget all of this. Do whatever you want to me—just help me erase this entire night. Think you can manage that?” She slid her hand down the front of Kellan’s jeans.
“Let’s slow down a little here, okay?” Kellan pulled her hand out. “You’re wasted.”
“In case you missed it, I’m kind of having a shitty night.”
“And I want to help you.”
“Good. Because I want you to help me.” She reached for the hem of Kellan’s shirt, trying for closeness.
Kellan grabbed her hand and held it. “Let’s go back to my place. We can talk. Process what just happened in there.”
“Fuck processing.” She lunged at Kellan, her tongue halfway down her throat before Kellan broke them apart.
“I won’t have sex with you like this.”
“Excuse me?”
“You’re upset. I get it. I want to be there for you. As your friend. As more than that, to be honest.”
“But you won’t give me what I want?” She folded her arms across her chest and was unable to stop herself from stumbling a little. “Since when are you so righteous?”
“You drank a lot in a very short period of time. Not to mention you’re dealing with some heavy emotions. I’m not going to take advantage of you like this.”
“I’m pretty much throwing myself at you. That’s not really taking advantage.”
“Yeah, well, forgive me for not wanting to be your revenge fuck either.” Kellan looked right at her, and Ashleigh saw both hurt and anger in her eyes. “I think we both deserve more than that at this point.” Kellan rubbed the back of her neck, her anxiety on display, before she held out a hand. Her voice was soft when she said, “Let’s just call it a night. I’ll walk you home.”
Ashleigh walked past her outstretched hand, hating that she was pushing away the one person who was trying to be there for her. But she was too angry to accept any kindness. She wanted to be mad. She needed to be. “I’m good. Bye,” she said unleashing it all on Kellan.
“Ash, wait.”
“Nope. I’m fine.” She pounded down the sidewalk, fully aware that Kellan was following. “I don’t need a chaperone. I’ve lived here my whole life.” She held one hand up, simultaneously waving good-bye and dismissing her. But Kellan stayed with her the whole way, and despite the pull in her heart, she didn’t allow herself to turn around to say good night when she reached her parents’ brownstone. Instead she raced up the stairs and into her bed, sobbing into her pillow, painfully aware her tears were just as much over her fight with Kellan as anything else.
Chapter Seventeen
In the back of the rideshare, Kellan’s phone buzzed with a text. Ashleigh. She debated opening it. It wasn’t that she was uninterested in what Ashleigh had to say, particularly after their street corner argument last night, but she was two minutes from her front door, and even though she was taking a risk showing up unannounced, she believed legit face time was in order.
At a red light, curiosity got the best of her. She rearranged the two hot coffees she was balancing on her knees and opened the message.
Hi. I don’t know what to say. I’m embarrassed. You were so sweet to me yesterday, honestly you always are, and last night I acted like a jerk. If you’re still mad and don’t want to come to my family bbq later, I understand. I’ve been stressing about contacting you all morning because I know it’s not fair and it’s pathetic, but I want to beg you not to write me off for the rest of the summer. The things I said, the way I treated you, it’s not how I feel. God, I hope you know that. I am so, so sorry.
The note was punctuated with a bright red heart, and Kellan felt her heart swell in response. She thanked her driver for the lift and took the steps in twos, pausing when she reached Ashleigh’s front door.
Are you home? It was probably something she should have checked earlier, but Ashleigh’s response was immediate.
Yes.
Great. Will you open the door?
Kellan stuffed her phone back in her pocket, just as the heavy door swung open. Face to face with Ashleigh, she was struck by her beauty. Even in sweats and a ratty tee, her skin radiated, and her eyes enticed.
“Peace offering?” Kellan said, presenting a to-go cup to Ashleigh.
“You’re bringing me a peace offering? I’m pretty sure this should be the other way around.”
She ticked her head to the side. “Yeah, well, I’m closer to the Beanery, and I thought you could probably use this right about now.”
“You are amazing,” Ashleigh said, pulling her inside. Ashleigh took the paper cup and held it close to her face, clearly indulging in the aroma from the fresh brew.
“Are you hungover?”
“Some. I managed to get a lot of sleep. Motrin and a hot shower helped a good deal. This, though…” She took a sip of some coffee that had seeped through the lid. “Oh my God, you made it perfect. Sweet but not too sweet—”
“Light but not too light,” Kellan finished. “I have been paying attention.”
“Why are you so nice to me? The way I treated you…” She placed her coffee on an ornate table in the hallway. “Kellan.” Ashleigh placed a hand on each of her forearms, tracing her tattoos before making eye contact. She looked so serious and distraught that Kellan was tempted to lean in and kiss her, assure her everything was okay between them, but she knew Ashleigh needed to say her piece.
“I am so sorry for last night. You were perfect and kind and I was obnoxious, drunk, and selfish.”
“And hurting.”
Ashleigh stepped slightly closer, leaning her forehead against her chest, and Kellan hugged her close, kissing the top of her soft blond hair. “None of those things excuse my actions. I know that.”
“Hey. We all have our moments.”
Ashleigh kissed her chest, and Kellan tipped her head up, placed a soft kiss on her lips, even as she wondered if it was okay to do that here.
“How can I make it up to you?”
“I’
m so glad you asked that.” She let Ashleigh lead her by the hand into the bright kitchen at the back of the house. Taking a seat at the kitchen table, she sipped her coffee. “Turns out, I have a plan for us today.”
“You do?”
“First of all, I got your text on the way here, which was very considerate. But I’m still invited to the barbecue, right?”
“Of course.” Ashleigh was moving around the kitchen, and Kellan was touched when she set a plate of scones in front of her. “Eat,” Ashleigh said, as she let her hand drift across Kellan’s shoulders before sitting down. “I only said that because I was scared you wouldn’t want to come, and I wanted to give you an out if you didn’t want to see me.”
“Party starts at three o’clock?” She took a bite of a scone, the subtle flavors melting into her taste buds. “Holy smokes. Ash, did you…”
“Ha. Don’t get excited. That’s all Peg McAllister, right there. You see how I got so comfortable here?”
She swallowed another mouthful. “I may move in. Is there a spare room?”
“There’s my room.” She winked and Kellan felt herself throb. “What were you saying about the party?”
“Well, if I could steal you until this afternoon, I may have gone ahead and made us a reservation at Ax To Grind.” She looked at her watch. “In exactly half an hour.”
“Wait. The ax-throwing bar?”
“I read an article about it a few weeks ago. It sounds ridiculous and fun. And it seems we both might have some lingering aggression we could stand to get rid of. It’s less than a mile from here—did you know that?”
“Is this all in response to my antics last night?” Ashleigh asked with a slight laugh.
At least Ashleigh didn’t say no. Not yet, anyway. And she wasn’t entirely wrong, but it was more complex than Ashleigh understood.
After arriving home last night, Kellan struggled with a mix of emotions of her own. Some she was willing to face, some not so much. On the surface was frustration over the evening’s drastic turn and dramatic demise. Deeper still was the reality that her feelings for Ashleigh went way beyond casual summer fling, a truth that both excited and terrified her.
Brooklyn Summer Page 17