Singe (Guardian Protection Book 1)

by Aly Martinez

  And that’s when it hit me.

  That’s all I ever wanted to be with her.

  I didn’t have to be perfect.

  I didn’t have to be the hero who did everything right.

  I didn’t have to carry the guilt and shame of my actions that night.

  I didn’t have to own any of it.

  With Rhion, I was free.

  To her, I was perfect.

  I was the hero who did everything right.

  I didn’t have a reason to carry guilt or shame. My actions had been successful in saving her life.

  And there was nothing to own.

  To Rhion, I’d always been free.

  She’d even written over a dozen books showing it. I had just been too damn consumed to accept it.

  “Jesus,” I cursed, burying my face in her neck.

  “Is that a yes?” she asked.

  It was.

  A yes to the hair.

  A yes to getting married one day.

  A yes to making babies.

  A yes to raising a family.

  A yes to growing old with her.

  A yes to an amazing life.

  But, most of all, a yes to being beautifully flawed together.

  Tipping her to the side, I kissed her with my entire being.

  Lips. Tongue. Heart. Soul.

  Scars and all.

  True to his word, Jude wore his hair up that night. True to mine, I wore a strapless, black cocktail dress when Pete took us to dinner. As I’d expected, Pete stared, but every time I started to squirm, Jude was there with a reassuring touch to set me at ease.

  Surprisingly enough, Pete didn’t take us to an ostentatious restaurant, but rather a chain steakhouse. I thought he did it for Jude’s benefit, to make him feel more comfortable. Though, judging by the glares they exchanged for most of the meal, I wasn’t sure it was all that effective.

  Dinner. Was. Awkward.

  Jude was polite and tried starting innocent conversation with Pete. Pete, however, threw snide insults disguised as jokes back at Jude every chance he got. Meanwhile, I nervously slid my mother’s diamond across the chain so fast that it was a wonder I didn’t cause sparks.

  By the time we finished our salads, Pete was already making up excuses about why he needed to get back to his hotel as quickly as possible. Normally, I would have been hurt, considering I hadn’t seen him in over six months, but I was so relieved when he stood to leave, still chewing his last bite of steak.

  Though my disappointment rang loudly.

  My heart broke as I watched Pete so obviously shun Jude. They were two of the most important men in my life. I wasn’t naïve. Pete had more than made his feelings on Jude clear on the phone weeks earlier. It wasn’t like I’d expected him to change overnight and immediately accept him into our little makeshift family. I had, however, hoped that it would happen that way.

  There was a myriad of reasons why I loved Jude. But the way he guided me back to our apartment without saying a single negative word about Pete was one of the biggest reasons. He recognized that I was hurting and took it upon himself to make it better even though he was the one who had been wronged. Another one of the reasons I loved Jude because he took his time making love to me as though he knew I needed the connection between us. A reminder that he would always there for me, no matter what the situation. Or at least that was what I took from his whispered promises that it would be okay. I wasn’t sure it would, but with Jude’s loving, green gaze staring down at me, I knew unequivocally that I would be.

  We eventually fell asleep. Sweaty, sated, and, for me, closer than ever before.

  The next morning, I pried my eyes open and found Jude sitting on the corner of the bed, fully dressed in one of his work suits, his hair still damp from a shower.

  “Wake up, beautiful.”

  “What time is it?” I asked, stretching out like a cat.

  “Seven. But Zach just called to tell me Pete was at the elevator. You might want to throw on some cloth—” He was cut off by a knock on the door.

  I groaned. “I really don’t have anything to say to him after last night.”

  “You gotta talk to him. I’ll make myself scarce and have Zach keep the cameras off so you two can talk in private, but you gotta do it.” Pulling the blanket down, he plucked my nipple. “I’ve got a meeting with Leo anyway.”

  I swatted his hand away. “Don’t do that. I can’t be pissy with you fondling me.”

  He chuckled, and another knock sounded at the door.

  Rising to his feet, he said, “All right. You get up. I’ll don some armor, let Scrooge in, and get him situated with coffee. Then you can be as pissy as you want after I leave. He acts like a dick to you, I’m liable to do something that will get me permanently banned from family dinners.”

  He walked to the door, but I stopped him right before he exited the room. “Hey, Jude?”

  He glanced over his shoulder. “Yeah, baby?”

  “You know I love you, right?”

  His face became soft as he turned all the way around. “Yeah. I know that.”

  “And, if he never accepts our relationship, I’ll still always choose you.”

  He cocked an eyebrow. “Yeah, and you know that I don’t give two fucks what that man thinks about me, right? I would never ask you to choose between me and your family.”

  I smiled as my stomach filled with butterflies—not the nervous kind though. The kind that show up when something feels so right that it’s almost scary.

  Another, slightly louder knock came from the door, but Jude didn’t move.

  “He’ll get over it, babe,” he said. “He’s gonna have to, because this, right here, between me and you is permanent. We’re gonna take our time growing it. But it’s gonna end with rings and babies and rocking chairs whether he approves or not.”

  The butterflies suddenly stilled. And not because it wasn’t still the most perfectly right feeling in the world. But because, with Jude staring back at me, a sexy smile playing at his lips, and promises of the future fresh from his tongue, it was hard to be scared of anything.

  “I love you, Jude.”

  “I love you too. Now, put on some clothes before the old man freezes in the breezeway.” He winked and then walked away.

  I didn’t immediately move.

  In every person’s life, there are key moments that stick with them for a lifetime.

  For me, they were my mother’s laugh when I’d run from the waves at the beach, the way my father’s eyes had lit every time I’d walked into a room, Apollo smiling at me from behind the prison glass, waking up inside that burning house, and hearing Jude’s voice yelling up at me after I’d given up on all hopes of survival.

  And right then, staring at my bedroom door he’d walked out of, I added one more moment to the list that would forever be a part of my story.

  It didn’t matter that he probably wouldn’t remember our conversation by dinnertime.

  Nor did it matter that it wasn’t a grand gesture or some huge romantic sentiment. He hadn’t whispered words to my soul or dropped to his knee with a massive engagement ring.

  It was so much better.

  Jude had given me the realization that I was no longer alone in the world.

  I had him. Permanently.

  I should have gotten up and gone out to talk to Pete. Instead, I sat in the middle of my bed, opened my computer, and typed the very first words of my newest book.

  My debut nonfiction. And yet, the greatest love story I’d ever write.

  “Well, there she is,” Pete said twenty minutes later when I strolled out of the bedroom in jeans and a T-shirt.

  I’d had to pry my fingers away from the keyboard, and I was already counting down the minutes until I could get back at it. One thing I’d learned over the years: When words were flowing, you didn’t interrupt them.

  “Sorry to keep you waiting,” I lied.

  “No problem. Jude just left.” He stood off the barstool and heade
d over to wrap me in a hug.

  I returned it coolly.

  “You’re mad,” he stated.

  I bee-lined to the other side of the bar, straight to the coffee maker. “No. I’m hurt.”

  “Rhion,” he sighed, but he didn’t say anything further.

  I made quick work of putting my coffee together before facing him. Leaning against the counter, I asked, “Why are you here?”

  His forehead crinkled as he straightened his tie and replied, “To see you.”

  “You haven’t seen me in months.”

  “I’ve been busy with work. Surely you remember how chaotic things get toward the end of the year.”

  “But not too busy to come down here and act like a jerk to the man who has been taking care of me for the last few months.” I kept my gaze trained on him as I tipped the mug to my lips.

  His shoulders fell as a flash of regret painted his face. “I wanted to apologize about that.”

  “Did you apologize to Jude?”

  With his hand shoved in his pocket, he slowly ambled around the counter toward me. “I did. And I’d like to make it up to you both tonight.”

  I laughed. “No way am I signing up for that again. I’ve never been so embarrassed in my entire life, Pete. Jude has been nothing but good to me, and honestly, I don’t care that he punched you back at the hospital. I’m starting to think you probably deserved it.”

  His jaw clamped shut, ticking at the hinge, but when he opened his mouth, his tone was gentle. “I probably did.”

  I blinked, doing my best to keep my surprise under wraps.

  He let out a ragged breath and stopped in front of me. “I’m sorry, okay?” He took the coffee mug from my hand and set it on the counter. “I’m struggling with you dating this guy. If it had been up to me after the fire, we would have wiped the floor with him in a civil suit for negligence. I honored your wishes back then and didn’t ever pursue anything. But that does not mean I ever forgave him for what he did to you.” He rested his hand on my forearm and allowed his thumb to carefully travel over the scars.

  I gritted my teeth and tugged my arm away. “What he did to me is save my life. And this is the last time I will ever listen to you imply otherwise.”

  He closed his eyes for a brief second, but when they popped open, resolve was dancing within. “He’s living here now, isn’t he?”

  I turned and headed for the pantry, breakfast less on my mind than getting some space from him. “I’m not sure that’s any of your business.”

  “I saw more of his coats in the hall closet than yours when he left.”

  “And…” I prompted, retrieving a box of granola I had no intention of eating.

  “And I didn’t realize you were this serious with him.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Pete, how many men have I ever introduced you to? Or, better yet, how many did I ever introduce Dad to?” I didn’t wait for him to reply. “One. Chad Gruber in eleventh grade. Dad told him that, if he ever touched me, he’d hire a hitman. Then he had Johnson put on a ski mask and abduct him from a soccer game just to prove he could.”

  His lips twitched at the memory. “Your father was always much more creative than I was. That must be where you got it from.”

  “Probably. But don’t try to change the subject with flattery. You knew exactly how big of a deal it was for me to introduce you to Jude and you were rude.”

  He pulled me into a side hug. “And I’m apologizing, Rhion. Last night, after I left, I did some thinking. I barely slept at all. Look, I’m happy for you. I really am. And I’m trying. It’s going take a little while for me to be comfortable though. You know I worry. And, while I know you don’t have all of the money anymore”—he waved his arm around the apartment—“you are still quite wealthy. Men see that—”

  “Jude pays for dinner every time we go out,” I interrupted. “Including last night when you left without picking up the tab.”

  He yanked his wallet from his back pocket. “I’ll reimburse him immediately.”

  “It’s not about the money!” I shouted.

  He startled and shoved his wallet back into his pocket.

  “God, Pete. For the first time in my entire life, it’s not about the money. It doesn’t exist between us. I’ve tried, you know, to bring it up. I told Jude the other night how much I was worth. He didn’t even turn the TV down. He patted me on the leg, said, ‘Wow. That would buy you a lot of shoes,’ and then asked me to get him a beer.” My voice hitched. “I don’t know what it is that I do for Jude or why he loves me the way he does, but I know with an absolute certainty that money is not it.”

  He swallowed hard, and his gaze softened in understanding.

  “I never wanted that money, Pete. I wanted my dad back. I wanted my mom back. I wanted Apollo back. I wanted my family, and money couldn’t buy me that.” My voice cracked at the end.

  Pete immediately wrapped me in his arms. “Okay. Okay. I’m sorry. No more talk about the money. I brought papers for you to sign in order to regain control of your father’s physical assets as you requested, but it can wait for another day.”

  “No. I don’t want to wait.” I sniffled and stepped away. Then I squared my shoulders as I announced, “I want it all back.”

  His head snapped to the side. “I’m sorry. What?”

  “The entire estate,” I clarified.

  He blinked rapidly and his mouth fell open. “Why on Earth would you want to get back into a situation like that? Surely you remember how stressed out that money made you. All the people knocking at your door, asking for a handout. And that’s not to mention Apollo. He’ll come after you again.”

  I’d thought about all of this in great detail for years. It was what had kept me captive inside my apartment for entirely too long. But that was before Jude.

  “I’m not scared anymore,” I whispered. “I’m ready, Pete. I’m gonna cut Apollo in for fifty percent. He is a horrible human being, but he lost Mom and Dad too. He’s out there alone the same way I’ve been for the last few years.”

  “Rhion,” he scolded. “You were never alone.”

  “For God’s sake, Pete, I was the definition of alone. My best friends are a team of bodyguards and a woman I’ve only met twice now. Maybe Apollo will find his Jude. Or maybe he’ll just find comfort in the fact that he finally wore me down. But, when I sign that check over, I’ll know that there is nothing else I can do for my brother. Then I’ll sleep easy knowing I tried.”

  He actually stumbled back a step.

  “And I want to pay Katie for the year she helped me, when everyone else, including you, took off.”

  His back shot straight. “Pardon me? I did not take off.”

  “Yeah, you did. Everyone did. Everyone but her. I know she has her own struggles, but she was there for me during mine. There is no price tag I can put on that. Margaret can go fuck herself. But I’m taking care of Katie.”

  “What the hell is going on with you?” he bit out, shock etched on his face.

  I slapped my hand down on the counter. “I’m done! I want my life back. I’m sick of hiding. I’m sick of pretending I’m someone I’m not.” I held my head high and announced, “I am Rhion Park. Heir to my father’s hard-earned estate. A woman who lost both of her parents entirely too young. A burn victim. A survivor. An author. A woman who is terrified of her brother. A beautifully flawed woman in love with a beautifully flawed man. I am not fiction, Pete. And, for the first time since Dad died, I’m okay with that.”

  Tears spilled from my eyes, and my heart pounded in my chest. I hadn’t woken up that morning planning to take my father’s fortune back. Like most things in my life, it had just kind of happened. But it was by far the most liberating decision I’d ever made. I was no longer a supporting character in the story of my life. From that moment forward, I was taking control back.

  Fearlessly.

  Pete stared at me for several beats, his face unreadable. “Are you sure? And I mean really sure, Rhion? If this is
about Jude—”

  “I’m positive.”

  He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Well, okay. Go put on some shoes. I’ll call the attorney and have him draw up the reversal paperwork. I don’t necessarily agree with this decision, but if it’s what you want, I won’t stand in your way.”

  Smiling huge, I nodded numerous times, unable to get any words out without bursting into another round of tears.

  Pete warmly returned my smile. “Don’t just stand there, nonfiction Rhion Park. Go get dressed. I’ll call Jude and have him meet us at the car.”

  I laughed and choked out, “We’re going to do it? Like, right now?”

  His eyes wrinkled at the corners as he grinned and parroted, “Like, right now.”

  I squealed, my heart practically in my throat, and launched myself into his arms.

  He patted my back. “Okay. Hurry up now.”

  He didn’t have to tell me twice.

  I listened to him on the phone as I slipped on some heels and my coat.

  First with the attorney, speaking in legal terms that I’m sure made sense to someone, just not me. Then with Jude, which much to my elation Pete sounded surprisingly kind as he filled him in on the details.

  Moments later, Pete and I were on the elevator riding down to the garage.

  I knew that that day was going to change my life.

  When I returned home, I’d be doing it as a completely different woman.

  But what I failed to consider was that I might not ever return at all.

  “What did the attorney say?” I asked Pete as we stepped out of the elevator. I quickly glanced around for Jude but didn’t see him.

  “He’s probably going to charge us triple for coming in on his day off.” He looked to me and grinned. “I told him that was fine now that you’re paying.” He winked.

  I let out a courtesy chuckle, too preoccupied by the fact that Jude wasn’t there. I’d vowed to take my life back, but the familiar nerves grew in my belly. “Maybe we should go up to Guardian.”

  Pete rubbed my back. “Calm down. He assured me he was on his way.”