“Of course it is.” He chuckled, then met my eyes in the mirror. “You all set?”
“I just want out of this truck,” I said, stretching my arms over my head.
As soon as we’d climbed out, we were surrounded by people that I barely remembered. Old men with long beards passed my mom around, giving her hugs and kissing the top of her head, like she was a long lost sister. Cam had disappeared into the crowd, probably to call Trix, and my dad was shaking hands and giving back-slapping hugs of his own. As I stood there holding Olive, I realized that, while I felt completely out of place, my family knew these people and felt comfortable in their company.
Mark’s arm slid around my shoulders until his forearm rested against my upper chest, and his solid form pressed against my back. If we’d been anywhere else, I would’ve laughed at the blatant show of possession, but standing in that courtyard, I was thankful for the solidarity.
“Well, I’ll be damned,” an old timer said, grinning as he looked at the two of us. “You have to be Doc’s kid.” He laughed, reaching out to shake Mark’s hand. “I’d recognize that face anywhere.”
“Yup, that’s Woody,” my dad said, a small smile tugging at his lips.
“Your old man was a good’un,” the old guy said. Then his eyes came to me. “And you have to be CeeCee. You look just like your mother did, way back when.”
“Lucky girl,” my mom sang, making everyone laugh. “What? You know it’s true.”
“Hey,” I said, smiling at him.
“Who’s the little one?” He shifted his head to the side, trying to see around Olive’s blanket.
“This is Olive,” I said, pulling the blanket down to show her face.
“Well, hello, Olive,” he whispered. “I’m Chunky.” He leaned back and whistled. “Hell, girl, that’s a fresh one. Shouldn’t you be in bed?”
“Well, now that you mention it,” I joked.
“Well, come on inside,” he said to the group. “We’ll get you settled and make introductions then.”
“His name is Chunky?” Eli asked in amusement as we followed the group. “Do you think at some point he actually was?”
“He was bigger when we were young,” Mark replied. “Think he had a bout with cancer a few years back.”
“How do you even know that?” I asked in surprise, looking up at his face.
“Poet likes to talk,” Mark said, his lips twitching. “I barely get a word in when I call to catch up.”
“I miss him,” I said with a sigh. I had to admit, that was one thing I was looking forward to when we got to Eugene. Poet and Amy. They were old as dirt and a couple of the kindest people I’d ever met. They’d seen everything and nothing I’d ever done had surprised them or made them look at me differently.
“He misses you, too,” Mark murmured, kissing the side of my head.
The inside of the clubhouse was both familiar and completely alien. I had flashes of memory, running around the pool tables and hiding from Cam underneath the bar, but the strongest sense of recognition came from the smell. Hardwood and beer and leather and grease with just a hint of sweat. Just like the clubhouse in Eugene. Jesus, it was like coming home.
“Hey, mama,” a rounded woman with short, salt-and-pepper hair said as she reached us, giving my mom a sweet smile. “You’re a sight for sore eyes.”
“You cut that glorious hair,” my mom replied, smiling huge. “And it looks goddamn fantastic. I hate you.”
The woman laughed as my mom hugged her, and something in me settled as they held the hug longer than necessary, whispering into each others’ ears as they rocked side to side. When they finally pulled apart, they both turned to look at me.
“CeeCee, this is Eileen. You probably don’t remember her, but when you were little, she used to carry you around all damn day.” Mom chuckled. “At one point, she strapped you to her back just so she could get things done.”
“You must be exhausted,” Eileen said. “Poor thing. Come on, I’ll get you settled in a room.”
Mark’s arm tightened and Eileen’s mouth twitched. “We’re not goin’ far,” she told him. “But she’s dead on her feet.”
“I’ll be in soon,” Mark murmured into my ear. “I need to have Forrest check on my shoulder.” I nodded. Part of me wanted to giggle at the fact that he thought I needed some sort of protection. I was as safe as I’d ever been in my entire life, surrounded by these people. It didn’t matter how far I’d run or how long I’d been gone, we both knew these were my people. My tribe. But the other part of me was comforted to know that he wasn’t just going to disappear now that I was safe. I didn’t let myself dwell on that realization.
“I can show you a room, too,” Eileen said to Lu, reaching out to shake her hand. “I’m Eileen.”
“I’ll stay out here,” Lu said politely. “But thank you.”
“She’s one of the boys, Ei,” my mom said with a smile at Lu.
“Right on,” Eileen said, nodding. “Well, if you need anything, you let me know.”
“I’ll do that,” Lu replied.
“Hey, what about if I need anything?” Eli asked, grinning.
“You come to me, pretty boy,” a large man replied, making Eileen laugh as she looked over her shoulder at him.
“Oh, honey, I couldn’t even keep up with this one,” she told the man, pointing her thumb at Eli.
The man chuckled. “Baby, you know that ain’t true,” he shot back.
Mark leaned down to my ear. “Home sweet home,” he said in amusement, giving me a little tap on my ass to get me moving. “I’ll find you in a bit.”
I followed my mom and Eileen through the room, and as we got to the hallway where the bedrooms were located, I felt my entire body grow heavy. I guess knowing that I was so close to somewhere I could rest had somehow triggered a physical response.
“Now, don’t you go tellin’ anyone, but I got a bathtub in our room and I keep it sparklin’ clean. You feel like a soak, you just let me know,” Eileen said. “I’d imagine that would feel real nice right about now.”
“Jesus,” I mumbled. “Are you an angel?”
Eileen laughed and looked at my mom. “She’s yours, alright.”
“I think she’s a clone,” my mom said proudly. “Didn’t even need Cody for this one.”
They both chuckled.
“You’re stayin’ in here,” Eileen said as she opened a door. “When your pop called, we got to work. All the boys with homes in town gave up their rooms and we got ’em cleaned and ready for visitors.”
“You mean they’re not staying here?” my mom asked, a thread of steel in her voice.
“Oh, they’re stayin’ here,” Eileen said with a smirk. “But they’ve got bedrolls they know how to use. The boys who’re here full-time have too much shit in their rooms, so we didn’t bother tryin’ to move ’em.”
“Ah.” Mom nodded.
“And some of the boys headed north to help with the search,” Eileen said quietly. “But we’ve got plenty left down here.”
“Thank you,” my mom said with a sigh. “When it rains, it fucking pours.”
“It’s what family’s for, mama,” Eileen replied, reaching out to give my mom’s arm a squeeze. She turned to me. “This one’s a queen, so you and your man should fit. Might be snug though.”
“Oh, he’s not—”
“He probably won’t be sleeping much,” my mom said, cutting me off. “I have a feeling they’ll be up most of the night trying to figure shit out.”
“You’re probably right,” Eileen replied ruefully. “I brought in a portable crib—” She pointed to it in the corner. “Wasn’t sure if you’d use it or not, but just in case. And we’ve got plenty of babies around here if you find you’re needin’ somethin’ else you hadn’t thought of.”
“Thank you,” I told her, growing more and more comfortable with each word. This, this was what everyone else felt when they went home. This sense of belonging and safety and camaraderie. It had bee
n longer than I could remember since I’d felt it, and I found myself swallowing against a lump in my throat.
“Here, sweetheart,” my mom said, setting the diaper bag on the bed. I hadn’t even realized that she’d been carrying it the whole time. “You two get comfortable while Ei shows me where your dad and I are staying. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
“Thank you, again,” I told Eileen as they moved to the door.
“It’s good to see you again, lovey,” she replied warmly.
As soon as the door was shut and I was alone in the room, I let out a sigh that felt like it came from the deepest parts of my chest. Finally, I could breathe again.
“I know it’s been a long day,” I said to Olive as I laid her down on the bed. “But at least tonight, we have some space to spread out and get some rest. First, though, I need to find a bathroom.”
She definitely wasn’t going anywhere, but I still put pillows on each side of her before grabbing my supplies and heading back into the hallway. The clubhouse was shaped differently than the one back home, but the logistics of the building were basically the same, and it was easy to find a bathroom. I smiled as I closed myself inside and inhaled the scent of cleaner. Eileen hadn’t been joking when she’d said they prepared for our visit. The bathroom looked like it hadn’t even been used since they’d cleaned it from top to bottom. I hurried through the motions and looked longingly at the shower before heading back to our room. The thought of a long shower where I could shave my legs and let the hot water soothe my muscles sounded like heaven.
“Hey,” Mark said, startling me as I entered the room. He was sitting at the foot of the bed, his feet on the ground and his shoulders drooping. “How you doin’?”
“Tired,” I replied honestly. “A little relieved. How’s your shoulder?”
“Fine,” he replied, brushing off the question. “A couple stitches. Hurts like a bitch, but I heal quick.” He was quiet for a minute. “It’s amazing, huh?” he mused, leaning forward on one elbow, the other resting on his thigh. “Doesn’t matter how long you’re gone, moment you step foot back on Aces’ ground, it’s like you never left.”
“You noticed it, too?” I asked as I put down my purse.
“Hard to miss. Gotta say, I never really thought I looked like my pop, but apparently, I do.”
“Really?” I asked in surprise. “You definitely look like him. It’s the mouth.”
“This damn mouth,” he grumbled, making me laugh.
“Hey,” I said, pushing his shoulder. “I like your mouth.”
“You do, huh?”
I rolled my eyes. “Stop fishing.”
“You’re more relaxed here,” he said quietly, reaching out to grab my hips. “I can see the difference already.”
“I’m—” I paused to try and find the words. “I’m relieved. We made it. And inside these walls, it feels like we’re safe.”
“You are safe.”
“For now, yeah. For tonight. After that—” I shrugged. “It’ll all still be there in the morning, like a tidal wave waiting to drown us.”
“Nobody’s drownin’.”
“Not yet.”
“Not at all.”
“You can’t know that.”
“I’m not gonna let anything happen to you.”
“Until you bail again,” I replied, the words out of my mouth before I could stop them. Both of us froze.
“Deserved that,” he said, his voice low as he dropped his hands from my hips.
“I still shouldn’t have said it,” I backpedalled. Jesus, he’d gone all commando and saved me and I was bringing up ancient history. “You’ve gone beyond what anyone would expect from—”
“Don’t start that shit,” he cut me off, rising to his feet.
“Don’t start what?”
“Don’t make this some altruistic—”
“Well, your vocabulary has definitely improved—”
“Goddamn it, Cecilia,” he snarled. “Jesus Christ. I’ve been in love with you since we were kids. You know, you know I would’ve come for you no matter what, no matter where, no matter the circumstances.”
“Let’s not pretend that has ever been the case,” I shot back.
“I was twenty fucking years old!”
“So was I!” I yelled, my hands clenched into fists.
“You want to get into this now?” he asked, his voice scarily quiet. “We both knew it was coming, so let’s get it over with.”
“There is no getting it over with,” I hissed. “It won’t ever be over.”
“Well, you sure as fuck got that part right,” he muttered.
His hands came up to cup my head, and before I could push him away or say anything else, his lips were on mine.
Chapter 12
Mark
It was a spectacularly bad idea to kiss Cecilia, but goddamn did she taste good. I wasn’t sure how she managed it, the rest of her was a mess, but her mouth tasted clean with a hint of chocolate from the candy she’d had while we were driving. It was incredible, and she’d been right about the drowning—I sure as hell felt like I was drowning then.
Her hands came up to grip my forearms, the nails pressing into my skin, and I shuddered. It had been so fucking long since anything had affected me that much. Hell, I’d had sex that hadn’t rocked my world the way one taste of Cecilia’s mouth did. Tilting my head, I pressed deeper into her mouth, the memory of how that used to make her groan swirling in my head—
“Am I interruptin’?” Forrest drawled from the open doorway, making Cecilia tear her mouth away.
I was going to kill him.
“What?” I snapped, not bothering to raise my head. I was too busy staring at Cecilia, who looked like she couldn’t decide whether to bolt or hit me.
“Just lettin’ you know they brought in some pizzas. Time to eat,” Forrest replied, his voice laced with amusement.
“Got it.”
He didn’t leave.
“Is there a reason you’re still standing there?” I asked through gritted teeth.
“Nope,” he answered, coughing to hide a chuckle as he walked away.
I sighed as Cecilia stepped away from me, avoiding eye contact as she reached for the diaper bag.
“We’ll finish this later,” I told her as she carefully unwrapped the baby to change her diaper.
“There’s nothing to finish,” she replied. “In a few days, you’ll be back in California, and I’ll be back in hell. Just drop it.”
“You know that’s not going to happen.”
“I’m going to get some pizza,” she mumbled, giving me a wide berth as she headed for the doorway, Olive snug in her arms.
I followed her out to the common area and watched as she was swallowed up by the crowd. No matter what she thought about the club or her place in it—the woman belonged with these people. Most of them hadn’t even seen her since she was a toddler, and they still treated her like a long lost daughter.
“This place is a trip,” Lu said around a bite of pizza as she walked up beside me. “The men look at me like they can’t figure me out, and the women don’t bat an eyelash.”
“That’s because most of these guys don’t have any clue how much the women pitch in,” I replied quietly. “These women have been kicking ass and taking names for years, they just do it from behind the scenes.”
“Yeah, that’s the vibe I’ve been getting.”
“When I was a kid, the men in the club paid an interest—especially after my pop died—in teaching me how to work on engines and fire a weapon. Hell, one of the boys taught me how to drive. But it was the women who pulled me into the fold—made sure I had clean shit to wear, kept me fed, made sure I was doing alright.”
“Men did the surface shit, women did the real heavy lifting,” Lu said with a hum.
I chuckled. “Pretty much, yeah.”
“But you lived with your mom, right?” she asked.
Cecilia was handing the baby off to someone and I p
aused until I realized it was Eileen. “Yeah,” I told Lu distractedly. “But she worked two jobs, so I went to my pop’s a lot, and later, to different club members’ houses. I spent most summers there.”
“Like a big, extended family,” Lu mused.
“Pretty much.”
“Must be nice. It was always just me, my brother and my mom. Now it’s just me.”
“It’s not just you,” I argued, throwing my arm over her shoulder. “You’ve got your niece up north, and the team, too.”
“True—if her mother would answer my calls. Do I have to claim Siah, though? I’d rather not.”
“If I had to pick and choose, I’d leave out Wilson,” I joked.
“Nah, Wilson may be a pain in the ass, but he doesn’t go out of his way to irritate me.”
“Fair point.”
“We’ve got an audience,” Lu said under her breath. “Better keep your hands to yourself.”
I scoffed, but dropped my arm. I’d felt the stares, too, I just hadn’t paid them any mind. The club was like a big family, and because of that, everyone talked about everyone else. It was par for the course.
“In order to keep things simple, Casper told the boys I was Cecilia’s man. I’m always welcome, but I don’t know these guys like I know the ones in Eugene, so they would’ve been leery to let the team camp out here.”
“Politics,” Lu said, nodding her head.
“Something like that.”
“I’m telling you, don’t even make eye contact with any of the women,” Eli told Forrest as they strode toward us. “I thought that monster with the pot belly was going to gut me.”
“They don’t give a shit about me,” Forrest said, irritated. “It’s your pretty face that’s makin’ ’em jumpy.”
“And the way you check out every female you meet,” Lu added as they reached us.
“I can’t help it,” Eli complained, shrugging. “I love women, and every single one of them has at least one attractive attribute. Farrah, for instance—”
“I’ll stop you there,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest. “Casper really would gut you—and no one would ever know because your body would never be found.”
Craving Cecilia Page 14