“Alright,” Mark said. “Let me get dressed.”
The door closed again, and I rolled to my back to watch as Mark pulled on his clothes.
“He sounds—” I searched for the right word.
“Off,” Mark supplied. “Yeah, I know.” He came to me and kissed me, the soft peck turning naturally into a deep, satisfying tangle of lips and tongues. “I’ll be back in a bit. Try to get some more sleep.”
He left and I sighed, staring at the ceiling. There was no way in hell I’d be able to fall back asleep.
Ten minutes later, there was another knock on the door, and I knew who it was just by the sound of the knuckles hitting the wood. How many times had I heard that exact cadence? More times than I could count. I pulled on my clothes and took a deep breath as I opened the door.
“You were shot?” my mom said, staring at me in confusion, her face tear streaked. “Why the fuck wouldn’t you tell me? I’m your mother.”
“Come in,” I said quietly, glancing at Olive as I moved back into the room.
My mom followed me inside with my dad right behind her. As soon as he’d closed the door, I sat on the edge of the bed, my hands clenched together in my lap.
“Things were really bad,” I said, lifting my hand to stop my mom as she started to interrupt. “Things were really bad,” I said again. “And I didn’t want to make things worse for you.”
“Bumblebee,” my dad said, his voice full of censure. “It doesn’t matter how tough shit is, you can always tell us anythin’.”
“How did I miss it?” my mom said, still completely bewildered. “How did I not know?”
“I made sure you didn’t,” I replied. I swallowed hard. “It felt—” I searched for the right words. “inconsequential, compared to everything else.”
“That’s bullshit,” my mom said. “Jesus, CeeCee. How bad was it?”
“It was just a scratch,” I replied, reaching up to run my hand over the scar through my t-shirt. “I put a couple Band-Aids on it and it was fine.”
My dad ran his hands down his face, pressing his fingers into his eye sockets in frustration or disappointment—maybe both. “We fucked up,” he said, his voice strained.
“I didn’t want you to know,” I reminded him. “And I was old enough to hide it. I felt guilty that it was even there—it would’ve been a hundred times worse if someone had noticed I was hurt and made a big deal about it.”
“Why in God’s name would you feel guilty?” my mom said in confusion.
“Because I thought I’d saved Lily,” I said, the words burning my throat. “I didn’t realize I had Rose until we were behind the tree, and by then I couldn’t move. I couldn’t get to her.”
My dad made an inarticulate sound and turned his back to us, breathing heavily.
“Lily was across the yard,” my mom said, her voice barely above a whisper. “I couldn’t get to her, either.”
“I know.”
We were quiet for a few moments, the room thrumming with emotion.
“Your grandparents took care of Lily,” my dad said, breaking the silence. He turned to face us. “I used to feel guilty about that, too. Couldn’t get to them. Couldn’t get to her. Couldn’t do a damn thing fast enough for it to matter.”
“Cody,” my mom breathed.
“Then I realized somethin.’ Feelin’ guilt, like I shoulda been the one to protect them, was disrespectful to the sacrifice that Gram and Slider and Vera made. ’Cause that’s exactly what it was. A sacrifice.”
I nodded, my nose beginning to sting.
“You saved your cousin,” he said, holding my gaze. “You were in exactly the right place and you saved exactly the right person. Your uncle and aunt woulda lost two children that day if you hadn’t done what you did.”
“I didn’t see it that way,” I said, blinking back tears and spreading my hands out, palms up. “All I could see was Lily, struggling to make her way around the house, bumping into things and crying.”
“That’s all we saw, too,” my mom said, her eyes welling up. “I’m so sorry, baby.”
“It’s okay,” I replied hoarsely. It was odd, but that simple acknowledgement and apology seemed to soothe the resentment that I’d carried around silently for years. “None of us knew how to handle it.”
“We were the parents,” my dad said. “We shoulda done better.”
I shrugged. “You did the best you could.”
I’d begun to understand just how easy it would be to get the parenting thing wrong sometimes—especially when things got overwhelming. Olive didn’t do anything but eat, sleep and poop, and I was still pretty sure that I was messing things up.
“Is that why you left?” my mom asked, the question dropping like an anvil in the center of the room. “Did you hate us?”
The lie was on the tip of my tongue, but as I looked between my parents, I knew that lying wouldn’t be fair to any of us.
“Partly,” I replied, making her wince with regret. “But that wasn’t the only reason. I didn’t like myself,” I said honestly. “I didn’t like who I’d become, and I couldn’t seem to change anything when everyone here looked at me the same way no matter what I did.”
“We saw the way you struggled,” my dad said quietly. “We just had no clue how to help ya.”
“Moving away was one of the best decisions I ever made,” I replied, sending him a small smile. “I got to reinvent myself somewhere new, away from all the memories of the shooting and the aftermath and Mark.”
“If you were trying to get away from Woody, San Diego was a surprising choice,” my mom said, wiping her face as she huffed out a laugh.
“Yeah,” I looked down at my hands and deliberately relaxed them. “I guess part of me was always waiting for him to come back. Knowing that we were in the same city made that seem possible, even if we never saw each other.”
“C’mere,” my dad said, gesturing with his hands.
I stood and stepped forward, and his arms gently encircled me, holding me against his chest.
“I’m so proud of you, Bumblebee,” he said, whispering into my ear. “You know that? I’m so sorry for not bein’ who you needed me to be back then, but I can’t say I’m sorry about the woman you are now. You’re a fuckin’ force of nature, just like your mother.”
“Love you, too, Dad,” I replied, pressing my forehead against the cool leather of his cut as tears ran down my face. I’d waited longer than I cared to admit to hear him say he was proud of me and mean it. The surprising thing about it was that he’d said it like it had always been true.
“My turn,” my mom said, worming her way between us. As she wrapped her arms around my shoulders and bumped my dad out of the way with her hip, I laughed. “I guess we’re a family that hugs it out now. Like those fucking Hallmark movies that Callie watches.”
“You know you watch them with her,” I teased, relaxing against her.
“Lies,” she countered, giving me a gentle squeeze. “I fucked up with you,” she said with a sigh. “In most ways, you’ve always been our first. Cam came along fully formed, but you were different. You needed me in ways that he didn’t, and I think I might have lost sight of that. I’m sorry, baby. More sorry than you’ll ever know.”
“Hey, at least with Charlie you have it all figured out,” I joked, sniffling.
“Please,” my mom replied, leaning back to meet my gaze. “We were so tired by the time she got here that the child is practically feral.”
“You know she drops f-bombs like she’s twenty-four?” I asked, grinning.
“If that’s the worst of it, I’ll count myself lucky,” my mom mused, her eyes twinkling.
“Hey,” my dad cooed as he moved around us. “Look who’s awake. Hi, princess.”
As my dad lifted Olive off the bed and smiled goofily at her, a sense of contentment settled deep into my bones.
Chapter 26
Mark
“I’m leaving,” Wilson said the moment I reached the table
where my team was seated.
“Yeah, you said that,” I replied, accepting a hot cup of coffee from Forrest.
“Let me clarify,” Wilson said. “I’m leaving the team.”
“Say what?” Eli sputtered.
“I find myself with responsibilities that interfere with my ability to affectively continue as a member of this team,” he said stiffly.
“Who’d you get pregnant?” Josiah asked, jokingly.
“No one,” Wilson replied instantly.
“It has to be a woman,” Lu mused, watching Wilson like a bug under a microscope. “It’s always a woman.” Her face morphed from concentration to surprise. “It’s that militia girl.”
“Her name is Kaley Campbell,” Wilson said tightly.
“Why do you think you need to leave the team?” Forrest asked.
“I will not be able to focus on my responsibilities,” Wilson replied uncomfortably. “I find that my attention is fixed elsewhere.”
“She in trouble?” I asked, dropping into a seat. Well, fuck. I was wondering how I would tell the team that I was out, and now it was going to be a hell of a lot harder with Wilson gone, too.
“Currently, no,” Wilson said. “However, history has shown that she will be again.”
“And you’re going to protect her,” Ephraim said softly.
“Yes,” Wilson said. It was said firmly, simply, with zero hesitation.
“I’m out, too,” I said with a sigh, figuring I might as well get it out on the table now, while we were all in one place. “Same reason, mostly. I think Cecilia’s hit her quota for trouble, but I gotta be honest—I’m done spending my time overseas takin’ care of people I don’t know now that I’ve got people here that need me.”
“You sure?” Forrest asked.
“Not interested in spendin’ months away,” I replied. “I’ve been without her for long enough.”
“Yeah, you have,” Lu said, nodding. I looked at her in surprise. “What?” she said. “People around here talk.”
“Fuck,” Ephraim said, looking around the group in confusion. “You mean we’re gonna have to break in two new members?”
“Three,” Eli said quietly.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Josiah spat. “What now?”
“The militia’s got women and children trapped on that property,” Eli said, crossing his arms over his chest.
“What, you’re going to liberate them?” Josiah asked incredulously.
“I’m going to do something,” Eli said. “Not sure how that’ll play out yet.” He looked at Wilson. “You need help, I’m there.”
“Jesus,” Ephraim muttered. “There’s only four of us left?”
We all looked at each other.
“I’m out, too,” Lu said, her words soft. She spread her hands out, palms up. “I don’t have it in me to start again with a new team. I’ve got a shit ton saved up—I’ll figure out something else.”
Josiah leaned forward dramatically and smacked his head against the table in front of him.
“Goddamn it,” Ephraim said with a sigh. He pointed to Forrest. “You’re out, too. I can see it on your face.”
“Wilson’s gonna need the help,” Forrest replied.
“He’s a full-grown man,” Josiah argued.
“And so are you,” Forrest said calmly. “But you’re the one who seems to be throwing the fit here.”
“I’m not throwing a fit,” he spit back. He leaned back in his chair and ran the fingers of both hands through his hair, slicking it backward. Turning, he and Ephraim looked at each other, and the nerves that had been making my stomach churn suddenly settled. Before he spoke, I knew what he would say.
“Fine,” he muttered. “Me and Eph will stay, too.”
“Don’t feel obligated to offer your assistance,” Wilson replied stiffly.
“Shut it,” Ephraim replied. “Not like we can go off and make loads of money while you’re all here, savin’ poor women and children from the big bad wolves.”
“Way to make us feel like assholes,” Josiah grumbled.
I let out a relieved laugh, and the rest of the table joined me.
“You are assholes,” Lu pointed out, still laughing.
“We’d still be saving people,” Josiah argued defensively. “We’d just be getting paid for it.”
“Uh huh,” Lu teased.
“Just to be clear, we’re all out?” Forrest asked as we quieted down. He looked at each person one-by-one. “Well, shit. Boss man’s not gonna be happy.”
“Fuck him,” Wilson said crisply, surprising all of us into another burst of hysterical laughter.
We discussed logistics, where we planned on making our home base and the possibility of starting our own company on a much smaller scale than the one we’d been working for. Forrest and I had been in the business the longest and had plenty of contacts to get us started if that’s the direction we wanted to go. I think, when it came down to it, we were all just burned out on seeing death and destruction playing out before us day after day. We all needed a break, even Ephraim and Josiah, who were a lot more hesitant to stop doing the job they loved.
By the time we went our separate ways, we’d agreed to a two-month break—enough time to relocate to Oregon and catch our collective breath before moving on to something new. Of course, that break would be dependent on what happened with Wilson’s woman—if anything went down in that situation, we all agreed to cut our hiatus short.
I was grinning as I walked back to our room. Wilson was so rigid and technical in everything from the way he packed his go-bag to the way he spoke that I couldn’t imagine what kind of woman he’d be attracted to. I didn’t know what Kaley Campbell had done to gain Wilson’s loyalty so quickly, but I was looking forward to meeting the woman.
“Hey,” Cecilia greeted softly as I opened the door. She was sitting up in bed feeding Olive, her hair tangled and her face lined with pillow marks. “Everything okay?”
“Everything’s good, baby,” I said, toeing off my untied boots. I crawled in beside her and leaned my back against the headboard. “Told the team I’m out.”
“Oh, yeah?” She looked at me and wrinkled her nose. “Were they mad?”
I chuckled. “Nope,” I replied, reaching out to rub her shoulders. “They’re all out, too.”
“What?”
“That’s what Wilson wanted to talk to me about,” I said. “He came here to quit in person. Turns out, that woman he’s been talking to is too distracting for him to do his job effectively—his words.”
“Whoa,” she said, her eyes wide. “Did not see that coming.”
I laughed and explained all the decisions we’d made at our little round table. It felt good to have something settled, even if it was work. Hell, I had to admit, at least to myself, that it wasn’t just work. The team had become a kind of family—and I was happy as hell that we’d continue as one, even if the circumstances had changed.
“They all agreed to live here?” she said doubtfully when I was done. “In Eugene?”
“Well, Lu’s from Seattle,” I said, leaning my head back and rolling it to the side so I could look at her. She was so gorgeous, even with her leftover makeup and hair flying in every direction imaginable. “She’s happy to come back to the cooler weather and be a bit closer to familiar landmarks, and Forrest was never happy in southern California—too many people. He stayed there because it was close to headquarters and to the rest of the team—but he didn’t like it. Eli’s in. Ephraim and Josiah don’t give a shit where they’re livin’. I think they moved around a lot as kids, so that’s what they’re used to. And Wilson—” I shrugged.
“He’s happy to be wherever the woman is,” Cec said, a small smile playing around her lips.
“Pretty much,” I said with a sigh. “And her name is Kaley Campbell,” I said, mimicking Wilson’s tone.
“Oh, excuse me,” she teased back. She looked down at Olive. “It’s over, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, bab
y,” I replied, brushing her hair back from her cheek. “It’s over. The Aces still need to deal with the militia. There’s some shit that needs to be handled that didn’t have dick to do with Drake Warren, but you and Olive are safe.”
“Are you sure?” she asked. The tentative hope in her eyes made me want to shoot someone, and I grit my teeth at the knowledge that I hadn’t been the one to kill Drake Warren. That particular honor had gone to Forrest, who’d shot Warren from the upstairs window the minute Cecilia had pulled away from him. Cecilia’s bullet had probably been enough to kill Warren eventually, but Forrest hadn’t waited to find out.
“Your pop will make sure that the militia knows you’re under Aces’ protection,” I said, nodding. “But I doubt you’ll need it. That was Warren’s vendetta—not theirs.”
“So,” she said, letting out a relieved breath, “this is what normal life feels like. I’d almost forgotten.”
“Well, I don’t know about normal,” I replied, glancing around the room. “You’re living in a motorcycle clubhouse.”
Cecilia elbowed me in the side. “You know what I mean.”
“Yeah, I do,” I said, leaning forward to kiss her. I pulled away, but not far. “We can start looking for a place today, if you want. Check the listings, get a feel for what you want.”
“I already know what I want,” she said, giving me a lopsided smile.
“Oh, yeah? What’s that?”
“You’re going to think I’m crazy,” she mumbled, looking down in embarrassment.
“Why?” I hid a smile as she shifted uncomfortably. “Why am I going to think you’re crazy?”
“The people next to my parents are selling their property,” she said so fast that the words all mashed together. “I saw the sign as we drove past yesterday.”
“You were payin’ attention to for sale signs?” I asked in surprise.
“I was trying to keep myself calm,” she replied defensively. “And I saw it and thought about how much I always loved that house and the orchard they have out back. Plus, there’s a pond that we used to sneak over to swim in.”
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