by Etta Foster
Everyone deserved happiness. And if someone like Richard needed help finding it, she wanted to do whatever it took to give him some joy.
Chapter 22
“A pony? A sleigh?”
Any hesitation Jacob might have had at an earlier time about this idea was immediately confirmed when he heard the tone that Richard was using. He had hardly ever heard it before.
He had used it often enough himself, however.
His grip tightened on the pony’s reins. When he glanced up to the porch, he realized Louise hadn’t understood the disgust in Richard’s voice yet.
It made his heart pound. Everything she had hoped for was about to come crashing down and she didn’t even realize it yet.
She started to say something, but Jacob didn’t hear it over the loud wind.
He turned his head to avoid a sudden cold front. Bringing the pony closer to the steps, he heard his brother interrupt Louise.
“But there’s no point,” Richard told her. “This was a waste of money! That’s what you two spent your time doing today? Running around town together to find a ridiculous horse? I can’t believe either of you thought this was a good idea.”
Louise took a step back. “We were only hoping to help you.”
“Does it look like you can help me? You’re just trying to kill me! Now that I can’t move around the ranch, you’re trying to patronize me.
“And on Christmas? It’s pathetic. This was all a mistake. You wasted your time and you wasted our money. It’s insulting.”
Richard had hardly said anything cruel in all the time Jacob had known him. And that was all of his life. He stared slack-jawed at his brother who was hunched over in the chair.
The young man had become a completely different person in just a week. He didn’t even recognize him anymore.
When his eyes turned to Louise, he found a flash of her hair and skirt disappearing inside as she ran off.
He didn’t know what to do. Jacob was stunned with what had just happened. His brother had never spoken so cruelly to someone like that, especially someone like Louise.
As he tried to think back, Richard had always had justification about anything negative he said. If the winter was ruining their crops, then his brother could grow a little moody because every attempt to save them was futile.
But Jacob couldn’t recall Richard ever speaking like that to anyone.
“Richard…” He searched for his voice.
But his brother shook his head and turned back inside.
This left Jacob out in the snow, his numb fingers clutching the reins of a pony munching happily away on the snow. It was a shaggy little creature with enough hair to keep it from growing cold.
He glanced down and frowned. There was little to do with the animal if Richard refused to work with it.
Sighing, he turned from the house towards the barn. It was beginning to snow again, and he didn’t want to stay out there any longer than he had to. And he’d stayed out longer than he had to.
“Come on, then,” he muttered to the pony and tugged lightly on the reins.
The pony obeyed easily and trotted alongside him as they returned to the barn. It was strange brushing down such a small animal, and rather uncomfortable as his back ached, but soon Jacob was headed back to the house.
As he trampled through the snow, he had enough time to think over the incident that had just occurred with his brother. There had been a lot on his mind lately about the entirety of the accident and it was time that the two of them talked.
Jacob stomped his way inside, attempting to shake all the snow off. The boots came off, the jacket and scarf came off, and then he set his hat on the rack before locking the door and heading down the hall.
He cleared his throat and rubbed his cheeks to get the cold out.
He peaked into the parlor to see if Richard was hiding out there, but it was empty. His bedroom, then. Jacob continued down the long hallway and then knocked on the door.
“I’m sleeping.”
It almost brought a grin to Jacob’s face. Almost. “I’m coming in,” he announced in a low voice.
When he stepped through the door, he found Richard wheeling himself around in his chair from the window across the room.
Jacob was pretty sure his brother had the larger room. And yet the man had never taken advantage of it. All these years later, there was hardly anything in there.
His eyes skirted the familiar pieces of furniture before flitting over to the curtains. They used to be in their parents’ room, lace ones that their mother had made when she was married.
He swallowed, pushing back the familiar feeling of heartache, and stared down at his brother. He wanted to glory in such a feeling. But then he thought of Louise’s hopeful face before she had fled.
“You have to give Louise’s idea a chance,” Jacob told his brother bluntly.
As he said the words out loud, it came to his attention that he might be accidentally bringing Louise and Richard back together if his brother obeyed his demand.
He closed the door behind him as he considered leaving. But he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t stand to see Louise disappointed after her hopes had grown so high.
Whatever it took to make Louise happy, he had to be willing to do it.
Richard scoffed. It pulled Jacob from his thoughts. There was a new wrinkle between Richard’s brow. His shoulders were hunched as he rested his elbows on the arms of his chair. The man’s hair fell in his eyes and only gave him a more brooding look.
That new look did little for him. Richard looked much better with his shoulders straight, his hair combed, and a smile on his lips. Whoever this new version of him was, Jacob didn’t like it.
“I don’t have to do anything,” Richard corrected him.
Perhaps the fall had caused head damage. Jacob started at his brother as he attempted to comprehend what was going on within Richard’s head. Surely it couldn’t make sense. It had to be a jumble of strange ideas because the golden child had rarely been so petulant.
He really was a child.
“You’re an idiot,” Jacob said.
Richard furrowed his brow. “And you’re rude. Go away, would you? Play with your new pony.”
“No,” Jacob said vehemently as he took a step forward. “It’s your pony. We got it for you and you’re going to use it. You’re going to try out Louise’s idea if I have to carry you outside.”
His hands balled into fists as a surge of frustration flooded over his shoulders. He had never wanted to hit Richard more than in that moment.
His brother stared at him with a frown. “You’re not going to carry me.”
But he didn’t sound as confident as he had a minute ago.
Jacob took another step toward him. “I will if I have to. And you know what else? You’re going to take her on that tour. You’re going to be nice to her, and you’re going to have a good time.”
“You can’t force me to have a nice time,” Richard pointed out.
“Oh I will,” Jacob assured him. “One way or another, I will.” He paused as he noticed his hands were shaking. He shook his head before glaring at his brother again. “You upset Louise.
“I’ve never seen you be so stupid,” he continued. He could hardly believe the words were coming out of his mouth.
But as he thought of Louise, he just wanted to bring that smile onto her face. And if it took Richard to make it happen, Jacob was willing to ensure Richard made it happen.
Richard gripped his wheels tightly. He started forward, but the bed blocked them and he would have to take care of more turning to get closer to his brother. So he stopped where he was. “Don’t call me stupid.”
“But you are,” Jacob pointed out. “You have a beautiful woman trying to make you happy. You’re an idiot for letting a good woman like that go. What, did you think scolding and shaming her would make her fall in love with you? You upset her.”
His brother threw up his arms. “If you’re so bothered,
then you take care of her.”
“I’m just trying to help,” he inhaled in frustration.
“Or better yet,” Richard talked as though he hadn’t been interrupted, “if you like her so much, then you go and marry her.”
Jacob took a step back in surprise. Stunned, he stared at his brother. Did Richard know what he had been thinking when the young woman first arrived? Did he really mean it? Where had that familiar optimism gone?
“Yeah,” Richard leaned back in his chair with pursed lips. “I’ve noticed. I told you I’m not stupid.”
He didn’t know what to say. Thoughts clouded, Jacob only recognized the small stab of guilt that was rising up through his throat. Words were about to come out. He finally noticed the weight on his shoulders for what it was.
Hoping he could ease the contention between them, Jacob swallowed and licked his chapped lips. “I… I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have.
“But if you do this, I won’t stand in your way any longer. I’ve done enough damage. Because I think…” He wiped his brow. “I think that chair is my fault.”
Richard jerked his head up. “What?”
“I don’t think… I was distracted and mad, so I don’t think… I don’t think I tightened Sock’s saddle as much. I don’t remember… I was angry. You have everything, Richard.
“You always have. The ranch is yours. That horse is yours. And now Louise? You have everything anyone could ever want.”
The words spilled out awkwardly. They tasted bitter on his tongue so he spat them out as fast as he could. Rubbing the back of his neck, he shrugged and stammered, “And now, you’re being an idiot. You could still have all of it. And you don’t even want it.”
Richard shook his head slowly. “Get out, Jacob.”
“I said I’m sorry,” Jacob started.
“Get out!” his brother bellowed.
The volume caught him off guard. Jacob had never been yelled at by his brother before. He was so startled that he immediately obeyed. Breathless, he made his way out and hurried off to his own room.
He stood breathless behind his door, one hand still on the knob. His heart pounded furiously, pulsing loudly in his ears. Jacob couldn’t hear anything else as he attempted to comprehend what had just happened.
It had been a mistake. That’s what he had told himself when the accident took place. Surely it hadn’t been his fault.
If anything, it could only be Richard’s fault for falling. And horses were wily creatures. But the more Jacob thought about it, he wasn’t certain he’d fixed the saddle properly.
One had to buckle it, and then elbow the horse’s ribs to make sure the animal wasn’t swallowing extra air to make it loose.
Richard had no reason to fall. He was a fine rider. If it had been the weather and ice, the horse would have slipped and been injured as well. So if it wasn’t Richard and if it wasn’t the horse, it had to be the saddle that brought them both together.
A lump formed in his throat. “It wasn’t my fault,” Jacob tried to tell himself. But he didn’t believe it.
He swallowed hard as he stumbled back onto his bed and rubbed his eyes. Life wasn’t supposed to go like this. He wanted his brother to have his comeuppance, but it was beginning to come at too high of a price.
Louise had been made upset after trying desperately hard to please Richard. And Richard wanted none of that. Jacob wished there was someone who cared enough for him like that, but he didn’t want to be so heartless as to ruin a budding relationship. He didn’t mean to ruin everything for everyone.
Besides, even if he had received his comeuppance, Richard was supposed to be more positive about the situation. That’s who he was supposed to be. Jacob didn’t like the new version of his brother and hated the idea of being stuck with him like that.
Running his hands through his hair, he tried to think about what he could do. But then he worried that he had done enough.
Chapter 23
Richard breathed in and he breathed out.
His heart hammered loudly in his chest so much that it almost hurt him.
Everything hurt. And yet he could feel nothing. He opened his eyes and noticed his hands were shaking. They gripped the arms of his chair so tightly that his knuckles turned white.
Nothing made sense anymore. He was tired and wide awake. He couldn’t feel anything, but he could feel everything. He bit his tongue and couldn’t decide on what the sensation meant.
It took him several minutes to pull himself together.
“You’re going crazy,” he murmured to himself a few minutes later.
Richard shook his head and took another deep breath. He closed his eyes until he could no longer feel his heart pulsing in his head.
It took a few more minutes before he finally opened his eyes to look around his room.
Nothing had changed. But his chest still felt tight. He rubbed it lightly as his gaze turned to the door.
It was still closed from when Jacob had left.
His brother Jacob. The traitor. The schemer. He didn’t know how he could have been so blind. It was Jacob’s fault he was stuck in this chair.
Now he was a useless lump of flesh, no longer a man. All because his brother had been irresponsible.
And those excuses. Those faulty excuses.
The ranch was not his. Especially now that he was trapped inside the house with nothing he could do about the fields or cattle.
Louise was not his. She was only in the way now and was ridiculing him by bringing a pony onto the ranch.
The horse, Richard supposed Jacob meant his own prized horse, was only a horse. And now useless since he could no longer ride.
Everything that Jacob complained didn’t belong to him now could. Just what he had probably wanted and what he had intended all along. Richard wondered how he hadn’t seen it coming.
A stinging sensation reached his hips. Grasping the arms of his chair, he flinched and gripped them tight.
The doctor had warned him such pain and irritation was bound to come and go. But it didn’t make the unease any better. Richard tried to focus on something else.
He knew his brother could be moody and private and occasionally unhappy. But he hadn’t expected Jacob to be like that. To be so cruel as to cause an accident like this. Glancing down at his useless bottom half, his lip curled.
Soon, he was going to shrivel up into nothing. He could feel it within him. No longer a young man in his prime, but a shell of what could have been. Richard was going to be nothing. Just like Jacob must have wanted.
The hair on the back of his neck prickled. It itched so he rubbed his neck again out of irritation. That only bothered his neck more. Ducking his head down, Richard wondered how he was supposed to live life like this when he was so frustrated.
“This can’t be the rest of my life,” he scowled to himself.
But he didn’t see any way out of it. There was no cure for a cripple.
His fingers dug into his neck as someone knocked on his door.
“What?” he called out. Though he didn’t mean to sound so angry, Richard didn’t apologize as Mrs. Pennyworth ducked her head in to see him.
She offered a smile, her frizzy hair spilling around her features. It made her look a little younger than her age of fifty or so years. He wasn’t certain how old she was. Perhaps she had never told them.
“It’s supper time,” the housekeeper reminded him. “Come join us. I’ve made quite a feast for everyone.”
The thought of joining everyone around the supper table only brought dread. “No. I’m not hungry.”
Her smile faded slightly. “Richard, you haven’t yet joined us at the table. Don’t you think it’s time? I’m sure the other ladies would appreciate your company.”
That made him laugh.
Who would want his company?
Jacob, his careless brother. Louise, a foolish woman. Luanne, who was disgusted by him. Only Mrs. Pennyworth would say such a lie with conviction. She wasn’t picky ab
out her company.
“I don’t think so,” Richard shook his head at her. “Let’s not waste our time.”
The woman furrowed her brow at him. “Is everything all right? I heard you and Jacob earlier. I hope the two of you aren’t back in your childish ways with the silent treatment and teasing.”
She had never taken his anger or his frustration seriously. It came across as belittling when she ignored him like this. Richard gritted his teeth as he searched for the right words to scold her for her own actions. As their housekeeper, she had no right to talk to him like that.