by Cleo Fox
She nodded. "Thank you, Chanel. I appreciate it, and the money. I can get my daughter the laptop she wants for her birthday now. I just needed a couple hundred more to cover the cost."
I nodded and left through the front door, walking toward the garage. Knowing she wouldn't be home in the evening to check, I debated picking up something to eat on the way to the library. I always wanted to pig out on everything. But I didn't like to eat alone, either. Not when I was breaking the rules. Having someone else there made me feel less bad. Even though I knew having a burger and fries wouldn't kill me.
Did Sai eat meat? Was he Hindu? I had no idea. I'd never been around to see what he ate. Would he take me bringing food for us to eat as a nice gesture?
My stomach grumbled in protest. I didn't want to grab the food and scarf it down in my car five minutes before we met up. I wanted to savor it.
There was only one way to know. The place I went to for my burgers had a meatless option, but if he ate beef, I didn't want to get him something that might be unsatisfying. I didn't care if he saw the gesture as nice. I'd tell him straight out I don't like eating alone and that I got him food for selfish reasons.
My resolve for caring if he saw my nice side cracked bit by bit. Part of me really wanted him to like me.
The two sides fought. One wanted to maintain the mask so no one would ever find out my secrets before I disappeared or died, and the other wanted to drop it all. Throw caution to the wind. Let someone know.
I could always just run away. Forget about graduating from high school or going to a college in Paris. I could just go there with the money I had, get a new name, and never look back.
The thought had briefly crossed my mind before I turned eighteen and didn't have access to the secret bank account my father made in my name. When I became old enough, my heart set on going to college. I didn't know what I wanted more.
Looking back down at my phone, I got into the car and turned on the screen.
The unread message sat on the side. I didn't feel like dealing with someone I didn't know. I'd read it later. Removing it from the screen, I opened a message with Sai's account and sent him a friend request, glad I had my friend's list private so Jason wouldn't start asking why I friended him.
Me: Do you eat burgers/like them? Like meat ones.
God, I sounded lame. And my heart began to flutter. He was the only person I met who flustered me. Maybe it was the passion of his words in the love letter he gave me. Maybe it was the way he looked at me that day before Jason and Lyric made his advances go to shit, and he thought I found him to be beneath me.
His profile icon popped up next to the message and the dots appeared to tell me he was typing something.
Sai: Yeah?
Me: Do you like milkshakes or soda better?
Sai: Chocolate milkshake? Why are you asking me these things? Are we still meeting at the library?
Me: Yeah.
I put my phone back into my purse before revving the car to life and pulling out of the garage. My mind raced as I made my way to Burger Bonanza & Shakes. They weren't as good as some of the places that my dad took me to on our trips, but they would more than satisfy the craving I’d had for over a month.
My mother was thinking about running for President and throwing herself into the races. That would put me under more scrutiny, at least while I lived with her. But it would mean that more of her time would have to be in D.C. and I could hopefully get away with more and live my life.
The thought of just running away entirely played in my mind, again, as I drove. Being eighteen also meant I could run, and she couldn't do anything about it. I was an adult in the eyes of the law and could disappear if I damn well pleased.
A frown pulled at my lips. Would her being a Government official fuck things up for that, though? Would they look for me thinking that someone kidnapped me or something?
I shook my head, banishing the thoughts away. I didn’t have time to think about that. Food called my name, and I didn’t want to be late to the tutoring session.
When I pulled into the library parking lot, only two other cars were parked in it. A Honda something with what looked to be a custom skin job and an old Volkswagen that could only belong to the elderly librarian who ran the place.
I looked at the food in the passenger seat. Would she yell at me for it? We would be in a separate room from the rest of the library, so I hoped not.
I sat in the back room of the library. The overcast sky didn't allow much sunlight to come in through all the windows, but the fluorescent lights made up for it. I stared at my laptop, refreshing myself on the last week for Civics class, even though I was already a week ahead of the class. I liked to stay ahead, so I could have fun on the weekends, and my parents couldn't say anything since I was already the top of the class.
It helped that I hung out with a group of people who pushed each other to always top everyone. It came effortlessly by Senior year to complete all our work before anyone else, and it got to the point the teachers would share their lesson plans so we wouldn't look bored out of our skulls in their classes.
I was a good ten minutes early, but I couldn't help but wonder why the hell Chanel had texted me odd questions on whether or not I ate burgers and what I liked to drink with them. Is she bringing food? Why would she do something nice like that?
As if on cue to my thought, she came around a stack of shelves, a bag of food in one hand and a cup holder with drinks from Burger Bonanza in the other.
I stood from the table and opened the door for her. She glided past me, smelling of soft jasmine flowers. She placed the food on the table next to where I sat and took her bag off her shoulder.
A slight hesitation entered her hand before she reached up to take off her sunglasses.
Her gaze went to mine, and she lifted an eyebrow. "Are you going to hold the door open all day?"
Coming back to my senses, I closed the door and rounded the table back to the seat I had picked.
She pulled a burger and some of Burger Bonanza’s classic dark, golden fries out of the large white bag. Guaranteed to be crunchy on the outside and soft in the middle. The room filled with the scent of beef, ketchup, and onions. Placing it down on the other side of my laptop, closest to my right side, she then took one of the large cups and handed it to me with a straw to do myself.
I stared at the drink, my mind still trying to catch up with everything.
"Why?" was all that could leave my mouth, and I looked at her, before sitting down.
I continued to stare at the shake, unsure if I should drink from it or not.
She looked at me and set her own food in front of her before pulling a laptop and a tablet from her bag. "Why, what? Is your brain having a glitch?"
There was the snotty tone I expected from her, and it didn't fit the action of bringing food for our tutoring session. "Why did you bring me food and a milkshake?"
Chanel didn't look up as she unwrapped her burger and flattened out the paper before dumping her fries into a corner of it. She then took the lid off her milkshake, showing the creamy white color. "I was hungry, didn't want to rush eat, nor did I want to eat alone in front of you. My only option was to get you something. Don't make it weird. It was purely selfish on my part."
I took the lid off my milkshake to find the chocolate color. I sniffed it, unsure whether she would play a prank on me and post it online for the whole school to see. She was dating Jason Brooks, and that would be something he would get a kick out of and probably find hot.
She huffed from beside me. "I didn't poison it or tamper with it if that's what you're worried about."
I nodded. "I am."
She rolled her eyes before she took her straw out of the paper wrapper and stuck it in my drink. She sucked on it until the chocolate soft serve entered her mouth and she swallowed.
Pulling the straw back out, she licked it clean, her tongue curling around the plastic. My dick twitched at the sight. I chided myself for my dick be
traying me. I was supposed to dislike her, not get turned on by her licking a straw clean.
Her gaze met mine, and I thanked whatever may be for blessing me with a dark complexion that hid my blush. "Better? Or do you want me to take a bite of your burger and fries, too?"
Clearing my throat, I shook my head and took a sip of the milkshake. "I believe you."
Another roll of her eyes. She turned back to her food, taking a fry and dipping it in her shake.
I frowned. "Ew, why would you do that?"
She pulled the half-bitten fry away from her lips and looked to me. "Have you ever tried it?"
I shook my head hard. "Why would I? Those two things don't belong together."
Her red ponytail bounced as she shook her head. "That's just ignorant thinking. You can't say something is gross unless you've had it and know for a fact you don't like it.” She pointed a white-tipped fingernail at my fries. “Try it, and if you hate it, then you can say ew."
With a sigh, I picked one up. She was right, it was ignorant of me since I hadn't tried it. I don't know why any sane person would, though. I dipped the end in the chocolate pool. Hesitation filled me as I brought it to my mouth, anticipating grossness.
The sweet shake touched my tongue, followed by the saltiness of the fry, and my eyes closed. It was good. It was really fucking good. "I was wrong."
"See? I told you. Best of both worlds. The only way to eat fries in my book."
I opened my eyes to peer over at her. She smiled at me. It was the first time in a long while I'd seen a true smile on her face and not a smirk.
Setting the shake down on the table, I looked at the still wrapped burger. "Why did you ask me if I ate burgers?"
Her gaze went away from mine, again, and she lifted the bun off her burger to take off the pickles, but still popped one in her mouth. She set the rest next to her fries. "I know your last name is Indian, but I wasn't sure if you were Hindu or not. I didn't want to buy you a beef burger and you not be able to eat it. Bonanza has meatless and chicken options, so I wanted to make sure before I got it."
Oddly considerate of her. "And you cared why?"
She huffed, again. "Because I told you I don't want to eat alone in front of you. It makes me self-conscious. Do I need to get the third degree for thinking of myself? I didn't do it to be nice. Don't get it twisted."
I frowned at her. Possible embarrassing hard on was gone. Unwrapping the burger, I took the onions off it and took a bite.
We ate in silence for a few minutes. I side-eyed her when she thought I wasn't looking. Her eyes were closed, and she took each bite carefully as if it would be her last, and she wanted to commit it to memory.
The rumor going around the school that she never ate and was anorexic felt like a lie. She clearly had no issue eating. If she was bulimic, she’d be eating faster so she could purge it before she felt like it had entered her body. That was just speculation of the general knowledge of the disorders I had, but it didn't feel like she had an issue with food.
After a couple more minutes, I cleared my throat and she looked at me. I pointed to our laptops. "We should get started if we want to be done in an hour. I charge by the hour, remember."
She nodded, and set the last half of her burger down. Her phone buzzed, screen lighting up with an icon. A frown pulled at her lips, before she pulled the icon down, removing it from the screen, before she turned her attention on me. "I remember. I have somewhere I need to be after this, too. I wrote up some questions I have in the areas I just don't get. All this politics stuff just goes over my head. Which is stupid considering my mother is the Governor of the state."
My eyes widened. So that was what her mother did. I knew she did something important, I just didn't know it was that important. "What were your questions?"
After an hour of nonstop questions and her figuring out how to layout the essay that was due on Tuesday, she stretched her hands over her head. "Well, I think that's all the questions I have for you today. I'm going to go use the restroom. You can get out of here if you want. Oh, wait."
She slid her phone toward her and turned it on.
I took notice of the fact she didn't use any of the security features to unlock it. Either she didn't think anyone would ever want to get into her phone, or she was lazy.
In the next second, my phone dinged. I picked it up to find a payment notification waiting for me. I accepted it. "Thanks."
Putting her phone back down with the screen off, she stood from the table. "Yeah. I still need help in the other subjects, so I don't know what I'll do about those. Most of your friends don't seem bad. I know Rhett gets the brunt of Jason's attention and that sucks. Honestly, though, the guy with the glasses is an asshole."
A laugh escaped me. "Yeah, Zeke can be too blunt at times, and not think through what he's saying. But he is really good at Physics if you want to reconsider it."
Chanel frowned. "I'll think about it. I'll text you a time for next week. I figure we can continue meeting here?"
I nodded. "Should I bring the food next time?"
She looked off to the side before shaking her head. "If it can happen, I'll bring the food."
She then rounded the table and went out the door, leaving her phone on the table. Either she forgot to take it with her or she didn't want to.
What did she mean by "if it can happen?"
My gut rolled as I stared at her phone. Zeke wanted me to send her number to him so his 'friends' could unlock her cloud and see what secrets she held. The two sides of myself battled for dominance. I didn't have much time. I felt guilty for even considering it, but the part of me that was curious was stronger than the side that felt bad.
Before I could think about it too long and she came back to find me on her phone, I swiped it up and slid my finger over the screen to wake it up. Her screensaver came up. A younger image of her stood with a man, both leaning against a Shelby Cobra, big smiles on their faces. It was a nice car. I bet it would be fun in a race. Was that her dad?
Quickly, I opened her regular text app for between phone numbers. It didn't look like she used it often, with only a thread to Jason who had 'fuckhead' after his name. And they hadn't texted since the day before. Something about college.
Not letting myself get distracted by curiosity to read their text messages, I made a new message thread to Zeke's number with a simple: 'Here'.
As soon as it sent, I deleted it and backed out of the app.
Returning her phone to the state it was before she left, I placed it back on the desk. I then hurried to put my laptop away and toss the Bonanza trash into the can before taking the little bit of milkshake I had with me.
It was a nice surprise. I figured I would have to wait to eat until afterward. It was kind of her to ask if I ate beef, too. My family did come from India originally before going to the UK, but neither of my parents were practicing Hindus, choosing to be Atheists and raise me the same. I liked to believe in something more, though not a god. I guess I believed in the universe.
I left the room before Chanel returned and let out a sigh of relief. At least I was fast enough, or she was slow enough that she didn't catch me with her phone or looking guilty over it, which I knew I did.
Zeke better not make me regret this.
After Sai left, I returned to the room to finish off the rest of my food and work on the essay while all the information was still fresh in my head. I powered through, writing the fifteen-hundred-word essay in two hours, and ran it through a grammar and spell check program before emailing it to the teacher. It would be the first time in a while that I turned in a paper before it was due and was actually confident in it enough to think I would get at least a B, which would help keep my grades up.
By the time I finished, it was nearly four in the afternoon, and I couldn't wait to get to the amusement park to ride the rollercoasters. I had only been able to go twice since the place opened in the summer, and I wasn't sure if I would be able to get another chance to go before it
got too cold and they closed it down for the winter.
Picking up my trash, I grabbed Sai’s from the tiny bin in the room. I honestly doubted the old woman would check the trash in the room before it started to reek. The paranoid part of me worried she would tell someone how we stunk the place up and it would get back to my mother somehow. I knew it was a long shot. But I didn't want to risk it one bit. Public trash was more likely to get picked up, or at the very least, not stink up the place when the remnants of my delicious shake went south.
Going to my car, I tapped the edge of my trunk. The car beeped in response to the key in my bag and opened up. I put my laptop and tablet in it before taking out the old, ratty dark blue Yale hoodie that belonged to my dad and one of the few things I saved before my mother got rid of anything of his in the house. She barely grieved him.
I threw it on over my sweater, and pulled the hood up. It was triple the size of my body and super baggy. It hung down to my knees, nearly covering the skirt and making it look like I didn't have anything on under. I came prepared though, taking out an old pair of black sweats my mother would die if she saw me wearing even around the house. Bishops never wore sweats, not even to sleep in. "What if something happens and we need to vacate the house in the middle of the night, Chanel?"
I had rolled my eyes in response and told her that people would see us in comfortable clothing because we were supposed to be asleep. No one would think twice about one of us wearing sweats to bed. That had earned me a slap across the cheek that stung for several minutes.
Slipping the pants on under my skirt, I quickly hiked them up before anyone could see my underwear, and slid the skirt down over them, taking it off. I replaced my heels with some old sneakers. There was no way in hell I was going to wear the painful things while enjoying myself at the amusement park.
With most of my dressed down disguise complete, I closed the trunk and got in the car. Opening the glove box, I took out the makeup wipes I stashed there for days I needed them. Taking off my eyelashes and scrubbing off the layers of foundation and everything else, I threw my hair into a messy bun and used my phone to look at myself.