I'm Watching You

by Karen Rose

  She pounded her fist against him, once. A restrained blow. “He had a stroke on the operating table. Aidan had just brought me home and Owen called me. The doctors say he probably won’t make it. Dammit to hell, Abe. Conti hurt him because of me.” Her shoulders heaved, but she didn’t cry. “Vincent’s a good man. Gentle. He never hurt anyone.”

  He rocked her gently and her fists opened and closed against his chest. “This isn’t your fault, Kristen. You know this.”

  Again she pounded, harder this time. “And then I came inside and Aidan closed the door …” Her tears were flowing now and he had no idea what to do, so he just held her. “And somebody knocked on the front door and I was afraid. Afraid to open my own damn door.” She swallowed a sob, a horrible choking sound. “But it was just the man who does the neighborhood association. They signed a petition. All of them. They say I’m bad for the neighborhood. They want me to move. They want to throw me out of my own house.”

  Her shoulders heaved again and Abe wanted to find the neighbors and throttle them all. “They can’t make you move, honey,” he soothed. “We’ll take care of that later.”

  “So I ripped up the petition and threw it in his face,” she said, as if he hadn’t even spoken. “Then I told him to go to hell and take his association with him.”

  He smiled against her plaster-covered hair. “Good for you,” he murmured.

  She pulled back, her face wet but her eyes clear. “Then I changed my clothes. I’ll wear whatever the hell I want to wear in my own damn house. And I got a hammer and put that hole in the wall.” She looked around with a frown. “And then the cats ran and hid.”

  He wiped her face with his thumb. “They’ll come out when they get hungry.”

  “I know. Your brother asked me what I wanted him to do and I told him to get rid of the cabinets. And the appliances. They’re old and ugly.”

  “They are.” He felt for the pins in her hair and pulled them out one by one, freeing her curls. “But you’re beautiful.”

  Her agitation seemed to dissipate before his eyes. “You really think so, don’t you?”

  “I know so.”

  She swallowed hard and his heart stuttered. “You make me feel beautiful.” It was a husky whisper, as if she was afraid for anyone to hear. “And…”

  He brushed her lips with his. “And desirable?”

  Her eyes heated. “No one ever has before.”

  “Their loss, my gain,” he muttered, pulling her back against him and taking possession of her mouth the way he’d been thinking about since sending her to bed last night alone. Her hands flattened against his chest, her fingers raking through his hair, then moving back and forth, pleasuring him as he’d taught her to do. His hands moved down her back, itching to catch her from behind and pull her into him. To thrust against her. To feel her writhe against him. But his mind regained control at the last moment and his hands detoured to anchor at her hips. He groaned against her lips and pulled away. “I don’t want to push you.”

  She was breathing as hard as he was. “You’re not.” She stood on her toes to wrap her arms around his neck, pressing her breasts against him. “You came to my room last night,” she breathed into his mouth, then kissed him softly. “Why?”

  His mouth went dry as dust. “I was checking on you.”

  She shook her head, every movement grazing his lips with hers. “Try again.”

  He closed his eyes and his fingers stretched, half-touching her round rear end. The tight biker shorts showed off every curve. “I was hoping you’d ask me to stay.”

  “For what purpose?” It was practically a purr and a shudder racked him from head to toe. Once again she’d taken the reins, and once again he’d be damned before he stole one inch of her advantage. If this was a tease, he’d bear it. It might kill him, but he’d bear it. He could tell she wanted him. Her nipples were pebbled hard against his chest, but until she was ready, until she asked him, he would control himself.

  Even if it killed him. And it just might.

  She nipped at his lips. “What would you have done if I’d asked you to stay?”

  He swallowed again. “Kristen, I don’t think…”

  “I dreamed about you all night,” she murmured.

  He opened his eyes and found himself drowning once again. “What did you dream?”

  “I dreamed you put your hands on me and made me cry out.”

  His hands covered her buttocks and kneaded gently. “Like this?”

  “Exactly like that. Then you made love to me.” Then she hesitated, looking away.

  He caught her chin with one hand, leaving the other firmly grasping her butt. “Look at me. Please.” He waited until she lifted her lashes, shy uncertainty in her eyes. “You dreamed I made love to you. And then?”

  She took several rapid breaths. “And I pleased you.”

  He felt as if he’d taken a physical blow. “Kristen…It’s not about whether you please me. Haven’t you figured that out by now? It’s how we please each other.” He kissed her, a rich melding of mouths and hearts. “Did you like that?”

  She nodded, so slightly. “Yes.”

  He let go of her chin and covered her breast, heard her inhale sharply, felt her nipple grow rigid against his palm. “And you like this?”

  She licked her lips, catching her lower lip between her teeth. “Yes.”

  He brushed his knuckles against the juncture of her thighs and felt her shiver. “And the other night, you liked that?”

  “You know I did.”

  He took one of her hands from his neck and kissed her palm. “Then I promise you I’ll like the same things.” He brought her hand lower until her fingertips trailed the length of his erection and he tensed. “See? I like it, too.”

  Indecision clouded her eyes and once again he cursed whoever had hurt her in the past. Whoever had damaged her magnificent spirit. “But you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” he murmured and her mouth set in a determined line. It was as if he’d thrown down the gauntlet. “Kristen, I’m not daring you. We can stop right n—”

  She pulled his head down for a kiss so hard he saw stars. “Don’t,” she whispered fiercely. “Don’t treat me like spun glass. When you came into my room last night, what did you want from me? Be honest with me.”

  As if he could lie. “I wanted to be inside you. I wanted to feel you come around me. I wanted to hear you cry out and beg me for more. I wanted all that more than I wanted to breathe. Is that honest enough for you?”

  Her eyes filled with tears and she defiantly blinked them away. “Yes. Now tell me this. If things were normal…If I were normal—”

  This time he cut off her words with a hard kiss. “Stop. There is nothing wrong with you.”

  Her eyes flashed, impossibly, intensely green. “Then show me. Show me how it’s supposed to be. Because I’ve always wanted to know.”

  For a moment they stood staring at each other and Abe realized a new gauntlet had been thrown down, by Kristen. She wanted to be romanced. Wooed. And he realized something else. He was scared to death. He drew in a lungful of air and slowly let it out. “Okay. How it’s supposed to be. Well, first I’d be dressed better. Suit and a tie, maybe.”

  Her lips curved and her hands splayed wide against his bare chest. “I like you just like this. Then what?”

  Her hands felt so incredibly good. “Then I’d ply you with a terrific meal.”

  She raised a brow. “You can cook?”

  He smiled down at her. “Of course. Can’t you?”

  She scowled. “You’re supposed to be making me swoon, not insulting me.”

  “Sorry. Then after dinner, I’d put on some soft music and pull you into my arms.” He pulled her close and her hands slid up to his shoulders. “And I’d dance with you.”

  “I don’t know how to dance,” she admitted.

  “Doesn’t matter.” He brushed a kiss across her lips. “The dancing’s not important.”

  “What is im
portant?” she asked breathlessly.

  “Holding you. Touching you. Feeling your body against mine. Making you wish for just a little bit more.” He moved with her, showing her how to follow his lead, letting his aroused body brush up against her lightly. She shuddered in his arms and he gritted his teeth against the sudden wave of lust.

  “It’s working,” she said thickly. “What happens next?”

  “Patience, patience.” He kissed her dusty forehead. “We haven’t finished our dance.” But he slowed the motion until they were no more than swaying in place. He pressed kisses to her temple, her chin, the hollow of her throat. Heard her sigh. “Right about now I’d be wanting to feel you hard against me,” he murmured. “I’d dance you backward until your back was against a wall and press against you.” His brows lifted. “But you’ve knocked the wall down, so I can’t do that.”

  She smiled at him, a siren’s smile that set his hot blood to boiling. “Improvise.”

  He couldn’t wait any longer. He took her mouth in a kiss that was everything he’d wanted and she returned it with equal fervor. Her arms slid around his neck and she pressed against him with her whole body and he filled his hands with her round ass and hauled her up into him, thrusting the way he’d dreamed. And she arched, sweetening the contact until he groaned and sank to his knees, bringing her with him. In a fluid movement he pressed her to the floor, cradling her head in his hands.

  He lifted his head, every nerve in his body screaming for release. “This is what I wanted.” He settled himself between her thighs and thrust his hips and watched her eyes flash. “It’s what I wanted the first time I saw you.”

  “It’s what I want now,” she said. “Show me the rest, Abe. Please.”

  Rearing up on his knees, he pulled off her tank top, taking her bra with it. She lifted her arms in accommodation and then she was bared to the waist, open to his gaze. “You’re beautiful, Kristen. But I knew you would be.” He eased down to his elbows and looked his fill while she lay there, watching his every move. “When I got you like this, all hot and bothered, I’d tease you a little. Make you want a little more.” He bent his head and gently licked her nipple and felt her jolt beneath him. He repeated the motion and she arched, offering him more. But he kept the caresses light, whispers only on her skin. Until she whimpered.

  “Please.”

  He was truly going to die. “Please, what?”

  She arched again. “Dammit, Abe, you know.”

  He ran his tongue under the fullness of her breast. Tasted the salt from her exertions. Purposed that she’d exert herself a hell of lot more before they were done. “Maybe I don’t,” he murmured. “I was showing you what I’d do, and there you go, rewriting the rules.”

  Her laugh was strangled, exasperated. “Abe.”

  He decided to have mercy and gave her what she was too shy to ask for, taking her breast into his mouth and sucking, tonguing her nipple and sucking some more. She moaned and threaded her fingers through his hair, pulling him closer and he lost it. He devoured, first one breast then the other, until she writhed beneath him.

  “Oh, God,” she gasped.

  He lifted his head, panicked. “Please don’t say you want me to stop.”

  She lifted her head from the floor, meeting his eyes. “If you stop, I’ll hurt you.”

  His breath shuddered out in relief. He wasn’t sure what he would have done had she asked him to stop. He would have stopped of course, but…He kissed each wet breast then continued down her stomach, slowing the pace, planting kisses down to her navel.

  She lifted her hips against him. “Abe, I may be new at this, but I think this is where we take off the rest of our clothes.”

  He’d been sliding down her body and now paused, his shoulders between her thighs. “Then you should be glad you have a master like me around,” he said lightly. “You are so impatient.” He pressed his mouth between her legs and she cried out. “God, you’re already so wet,” he muttered and looked up at her. She’d lifted herself on her elbows and now stared at him, her eyes heavy with need. “This is what I wanted last night,” he said hoarsely. “Do you understand?” Wordlessly she nodded and his heart threatened to push out of his chest. “Can I?” And she nodded again. Unable to wait any longer he pulled her shorts, yanking in his haste, then dropped back down again, burying his mouth in her hot, wet heat. She fell back to the floor with another strangled moan, her arm covering her eyes, and he feasted. It had been so long and she tasted so good.

  Raspy little staccato cries were coming from her mouth and he slowed down, drawing out her pleasure. “Do you like this?” he asked.

  “Yes.” Her hips arched. “Please.” Then a few glorious minutes later, she began to tense and her hands reached for him. He reached to grab one of her hands, his other still under her, lifting her to him. “Abe.” It was a high, keening cry and he intensified the pressure until she unraveled, coming with a long, low moan. He kept kissing her inner thighs, soft, plucking kisses until her breathing evened out.

  His own body straining for release, he lifted his head and knew he’d never, ever forget the way she looked. Glowing, radiant. Awed. Covered in plaster dust.

  She met his eyes. “And then what would you do?” she whispered.

  He swallowed hard. “Then I’d ask you to help me with my belt, my zipper.”

  She sat up, tugging him to his knees. “Then I would.” And she did, pulling at his belt, each movement making her breasts jiggle before his hungry eyes. The tip of her tongue appeared as she concentrated, finally loosening the belt when he covered her hands with his, halting their quest.

  “Wait.” He pulled his wallet out of his pants and found a condom. Her eyes widened and it was like he could hear the wheels turning in her mind. Did he always carry one? Did he do this with all the women? On this point he could allay all her misgivings. “Kristen, the last time I made love was six years ago, before …” He could see she understood. “I put the condom in my wallet last Wednesday night when I got back to my apartment.”

  “When you met me,” she said softly.

  “Again,” he corrected, his voice husky. “Now, I would respectfully request you finish with my pants because I really, really want to be inside you.” Her cheeks turned pink and she dipped her head, to focus on his waist. She accomplished the button of his pants with some difficulty, but he let her do it all. Gingerly, the zipper came down and she drew a deep breath. She pushed and tugged and his pants and boxers slid to his knees and when she drew another deep breath he realized he was holding his. Tentatively she stroked him and the breath he’d been holding came out as a guttural groan. “Oh, God. That feels so good.”

  It must have encouraged her, because she closed her hand around him and squeezed and he knew he was truly going to die. “Stop.” He grabbed her wrist. “I want to be inside you when I come.” He kicked off his pants and managed the condom, his hands shaking in his haste. Then he crawled between her legs and kissed her mouth until he felt her melt again. “Don’t be afraid,” he whispered, pushing her down to the floor.

  She looked up at him, her eyes wide. “I’m not.”

  But she was. He knew she was. He could only make her fear disappear by showing her how it would be. He pressed deep, shuddering as her muscles contracted around him, accepting him. She was hot and tight. And beautiful. And mine. “Kristen?”

  Her face had tensed, but the fear was gone. “Don’t stop.”

  “I won’t. I can’t.” He pulled out, then thrust deep and she caught her breath. “When we got to this point, I might suggest you—” He broke it off when she lifted her knees to hug his hips and he went deeper still. “Oh, God. Yes. Now move with me, Kristen.” He set their bodies in rhythm. “Talk to me. Tell me what you feel.”

  “It’s incredible.” She cried out when he thrust and her hands reached to grab his shoulders. “I never knew…”

  And somewhere he lost the thread of the conversation, his body taking control and he took, and took. I
n the distance he heard her muffled cry, felt her body contract around him, her pleasure catapulting him into his own. He gritted his teeth and thrust a final time.

  Then there was peace. Panting, he rolled onto his side, still holding her, praying that now that it was over she wouldn’t feel guilty or retreat back into herself. That he wouldn’t accept. She was a most remarkable woman, although she would never admit it. He stopped just short of thinking she was the most remarkable woman, because in the stillness that followed completion, he knew he’d been a lucky man. He’d found two such women in his life. Debra was gone and he could never bring her back. But she of all people would want him to go on. And for the first time since holding his precious wife as she bled into a gutter, Abe allowed himself to imagine what the future would be like. To have a normal life again, with a wife to hold in the night and children with bouncy red curls. And it made him smile.

  Kristen lay there, steeping in the kaleidoscope of sensations with which he’d gifted her, of all places on her kitchen floor. She pressed a lazy kiss to his hairy chest and settled her head back on his arm. Relief was a major emotion at the moment. He’d been pleased. More than pleased if she was any judge. Not that she was, but neither was she an idiot. He’d practically had heart failure toward the end, so hard was his pulse. The way he’d lunged, his teeth bared. The way his body had bucked and shaken. The groan as he climaxed. He’d been pleased. And so had she. She’d come not once, but twice and it had been like nothing she ever could have anticipated.

  I’m not frigid after all. The thought was so exhilarating that she laughed out loud.

  Abe drew a rasping breath. “Now, if we ever got to the place where we actually made love, I would suggest you not laugh afterward.” His tone was teasing and her heart rolled over in her chest. “It’s very bad for my ego.”

  She kissed the underside of his chin. “Your ego is safe. I’m happy. That’s all.”