by T. S. Joyce
“Yeah.”
“Before you leave, I want to take you to meet someone.”
“You mean you want to drive me into the woods and chop me up? No thanks. I have better survival instincts than that,” she teased.
He chuckled, and his smile reached his eyes now. And oh, Asher was stunning when he smiled. “Odine is someone important to me. Someone I don’t share. I want her to lay eyes on you, and witness her reaction.”
“Oh, so you’re giving me something big then?” Ashlyn asked softly.
Asher dipped his chin once. “Meet her, and then I’ll never bother you again. Meet her, and you’ll understand me better. Meet her, and I can feel okay about letting you go.”
“I won’t tell a soul about anything that happened here.”
“That’s not what I mean about letting you go, Ashlyn.”
She swallowed hard. She should stop asking for answers now because he was putting her fears at ease again, making her weak and vulnerable. But then again, she had to know. “What exactly do you mean?”
Asher arched an eyebrow as honesty pooled in his bright blue eyes. “I want to keep you. Something selfish inside of me wants you to stay here, so I can look at you, touch you, get to know you, and take care of you. You don’t deserve that, though.”
The last sentence hurt. “What do I deserve?”
“Better, Ashlyn. You deserve better.”
“You say that like you mean it, but you want me to stay another night, and you want me to meet someone important to you.”
Asher’s smile dipped from his face as he approached the stairs. He climbed slowly toward Ashlyn. When he made it to her, he gripped her waist with one hand, brushed the side of his body against hers, and lowered his lips to her ear. “Because I told you…I’m selfish.” He plucked at her sensitive earlobe with his lips so seductively she huffed a breath and rolled her eyes closed, gripping onto his shirt with her closed fist.
Bum-bum, bum-bum. A loud, quickening drum sound filled the stairwell. Was that...? Was that what she thought it was?
“I can hear your heartbeat,” she whispered in awe.
Asher eased back, but the wickedness in his smile had turned to a worried frown. “What else do you hear?”
She gripped on tighter to his shirt and listened hard. “The wind outside. The creaking of the trees. The woods here aren’t silent like I thought. You breathing, me breathing, both of our hearts racing, a branch is scratching against a window, the hum of the refrigerator, electricity moving through the walls—”
“Stop.”
Ashlyn opened her eyes, expecting the spell to be broken, but Asher was close, his lips only inches away from hers, his eyes intent on hers. He stood at an angle, as if his body was ready to pounce, muscles straining against his sweater, Adam’s apple dipping with his deep swallow. “What if I’m not a wizard,” he whispered. “What if I’m worse?”
“What if you’re not as bad as you think?” she countered.
A soft rumbling sound emanated from his chest, and that sexy smile was back. So low she almost couldn’t hear him, he murmured, “You have your eyes open, but you don’t see me.”
“What if I’m the only one who sees you?”
Asher’s lips crashed onto hers, and his grip on her waist tightened. He was rough again, thrusting his tongue against hers, but this time she didn’t want to punish him. She wanted him to be himself. His wild, chaotic, dominant self. Because Asher wasn’t made in the mold of a normal man. He was made messy, and trying to clean him up, fix him, would strip away the things she was intrigued by.
Ashlyn slid her hands up his chest and then hugged his neck tight. He lifted her off the stairs and pulled her knees up until she was wrapped around him. And God, his erection was right there, pressing against the thin material of her leggings. Before she knew what was happening, her back was against the floor at the top of the stairs. How had he gotten her here so fast? Her stomach hadn’t even had time to react, but a part of her loved that. More slipping, more recklessness, more exposing his power. More letting her in.
She shouldn’t, but she trusted him. Sure, he probably had the potential to hurt people, but she’d only seen him heal. Sexy Asher, grinding against her hips, trailing biting kisses down her throat, but careful his teeth never broke the skin. Sexy Asher who was quiet with a poker face he only broke into a smile for her. Sexy Asher, yanking off her boots because he was done playing around. This was gasoline and a match, and she didn’t want to extinguish the flame. If she was leaving tomorrow, she wanted to burn up with Asher tonight. And oh, this man was on fire.
He pulled his shirt from over his head and shoved it behind him on the stairs, his eight-pack flexing with the movement. She ran her fingertips up his stomach to his chest, memorizing the strength of his body as she went.
“Need to feel your skin,” he growled in a voice that should’ve terrified her, but revved her up harder instead. Asher slid his hands up her sides, dragging her sweater with them, then pulled the fabric from her head and dropped it on the pile he’d started on the stairs behind him. His hands were steady, his eyes always on her as he lifted her easily and unsnapped her bra. This was the part of first-time sex she usually hated—the part where a new man would see her body. The part where her insecurities would rear their ugly heads and she would either ask for the lights to be turned off, or fight the urge to ask. But with Asher, it was different.
“Too loud,” he murmured. Asher trailed his lips down her chest and drew a nipple into his mouth hard, making her hiss and arch her back. Rough man.
“What’s too loud?” she asked.
“In your head. Shhhh, just be with me.”
In her head?
He grunted and lifted his hand, and when he flicked his fingers, the lights blew in the house, raining sparks.
“What did you do?” she asked in shock.
“You wanted the lights off. Won’t matter, though. I can see you just as well.”
He could see her just as…? Ashlyn gasped. She could see him, too. There was no light in the house, but she could see him as if there were a full moon right over him.
“What’s happening?” she asked.
Asher pulled her leggings down, down until they tickled her ankles, and he ripped them off. “I’m corrupting you, Sparkles.” He didn’t sound sorry at all.
Her body was on fire from his touch. Every nerve ending was exploding with pleasure where he massaged her breast, then slid his hand along her skin and gripped her hips. His lips were urgent as he kissed down to her stomach.
No man had ever made her feel like this before—so drunk, numb, and sensitive just with the way he looked at her, touched her, and craved her.
All she could do was lay back and watch him move, watch him adore her body, watch him lose himself completely. Asher shoved her knees farther apart. Her instinct was usually to clamp them closed, but with him, she didn’t want to. She wanted him to see everything about her, too. She wanted to let him in as repayment for showing her what he could do.
“Asher,” she moaned, gripping his hair when his lips touched her inner thigh. Teaser, and she wanted him to stay aggressive right now. She gripped his hair harder and guided him. There was that sexy sound in his throat again—the one that said he was part monster. Her monster, and her monster wouldn’t hurt her. He would keep her safe.
Asher gripped her hips so hard his fingers dug into her skin as he pushed his tongue into her. God, it felt so good to have part of him inside her. Ashlyn threw her head back and cried out as he slid into her again. Rocking her hips, she showed him how she liked it, and he responded perfectly, easing her into a good rhythm that was pushing her closer to release so fast, all she could do was ride the waves he created.
She was close, so close, moving with him. There. “Oooh,” she moaned as her body shattered.
The snap of Asher’s jeans popped, and she thought he would take her right away. Thought he would drive deep into her and feel her throbbing release
for himself. His body was still humming with tension, every muscle rigid as he crawled up her body. But when he kissed her, something was different. He’d softened.
Asher sipped at her lips gently, plucking at them and only brushing his tongue shallowly into her mouth on every third kiss. He ran his knuckles down her ribs, down the curve of her waist, and around the swell of her hips. He opened his hand and ran his palm down the outside of her arm to her hand and intertwined their fingers, but still, he didn’t lower his hips to hers. The fire inside of her calmed along with her fading aftershocks, but was replaced by something more. He was building up her need for him again, but the edge of desperation wasn’t there anymore. Now, he was adoring her, and as he pulled her hand to his chest and pressed the flat of her palm onto the crease between his hard pecs, she realized he was asking her to adore him, too.
For some reason, it made her eyes prickle with tears. He was so different than what she’d expected. Dark Asher had a soft side that he likely exposed to no one. No one but her.
“Come here,” he murmured against her lips, and then eased off her and sat back against the wall. Ashlyn hesitated for a moment. In this strange, dim lighting, his eyes reflected oddly, but his expression was soft.
Overcome by deep affection for him, Ashlyn crawled to him and straddled his lap. She cupped his cheeks and let his beard rasp against the palms of her hands before she slipped her arms around his shoulders and hugged him.
Asher let off a shuddering breath and slid his hands up her back. And then he held her, rocked her gently from side to side, and buried his face against her neck. Sure, his erection was still rigid against her sex, but he wasn’t moving them for more right now. He seemed content to just be in her arms.
“I don’t want to take you rough for our first time,” he said, his voice low and gravelly.
“Okay,” she murmured in surprise, blinking hard at the wall and hugging him tighter.
Asher massaged the back of her neck, and ran his hand down her hair, tugging the ends over and over as he rocked them. It was cold in the cabin, in 1010, And when Ashlyn eased back to get a look at his face, his expression was relaxed, and he wore a slight smile.
“Sometimes you think too loud.”
“Can you hear me?”
The smile dipped from his lips. “I try not to with you.”
“Can you read minds?”
Asher shrugged one shoulder up and looked off down the stairs.
She was losing him, so she placed her palms on his cheeks and pulled his gaze back to her. “Can you?”
“I can do lots of things I didn’t ask for.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Asher shook his head slowly. “Talking doesn’t help or make it go away, Ashlyn. It doesn’t make me stronger or weaker, and it’s not something I need.”
“How do you know?”
Asher inhaled deeply and twirled his finger in the air beside her arm. “Can you see the blue?”
Ashlyn studied her arm, but it looked normal. “No.”
“I crave you,” he admitted low.
With a flattered smile, Ashlyn said, “I crave you, too.”
The corner of Asher’s lip lifted in the saddest smile. “Not like I do. We aren’t the same.”
Leaning into him, she asked in his ear, “What are you?”
Asher eased back and kissed her, then pulled away just enough to murmur, “Empath, perhaps.” Kiss. “Incubus, perhaps.” Kiss. “Darkness, definitely.” Kiss. “The Taker.” Kiss. The next one he closed his eyes when he whispered, “Wolf.”
Only parts of that made sense, and she had a million questions, but she could feel the worry emanating from him. The shame. Desperate to make him okay again, to fix the sadness, she lifted off his lap, then slid over him slowly until he was buried deep inside of her.
Now it was Asher who arched his head back, eyes on her, but his groan sounded softly, and his eyes lightened. Tomorrow, when her head cleared, she would be afraid of all that was happening to Asher. Scared for the power he managed. But tonight, she was going to love him and show him it was okay to be whatever he was. That he was enough for her.
Asher tensed as she rolled her hips against him, riding him slowly, hand gripping the back of his neck, eyes on his. She’d never been confident enough to do this with another man—take control—but for some reason, Asher felt safe. There was a heightened level of excitement being in the dominant position over a man like him.
Beautiful monster. My monster.
Asher’s grip on her waist dug in harder, and his eyes blazed in the dark. She shouldn’t be able to see him this well, but he was doing something strange to her body. He was sharing his power somehow. It wasn’t scary. It was the ultimate let-in. A snarl rattled his throat, louder than he’d allowed before, so Ashlyn grinned at him. Good Asher, letting his control slip, but only for her. Only me.
“Only you,” he ground out. He pushed off the wall and kissed her hard. Teeth knocked teeth, but it didn’t hurt. It set her middle on fire as they moved together. Ocean waves. That’s the only thing she could compare this to. Crashing ocean waves, and everything was getting louder, brighter. Too bright. Her chest felt strange against his. It vibrated, and she felt pulled closer to him.
And when she eased her eyes open, Asher was leaking black fog. It was thick, roiling from his skin, surrounding them. It had no scent, but it lifted her hair and caressed her skin. And that’s when she saw the blue, entwining with the black, swirling like two tornados colliding. Her body hummed with power, but she couldn’t stop moving against him. Asher’s hand was gently gripping the back of her hair, and he was rocking against her, meeting each roll of her hips, and she was close. Soooo close.
“I won’t hurt you,” he promised, his eyes flickering to the storm that swirled around them. “I’ll take care of you.”
He was pushing so deeply into her now, his eyes intense as he gritted his teeth and watched her. His body was shaking. Asher was close, too, and she loved this. Loved being in the middle of this fucking volcano of power he’d created, yet still safe and warm against him.
For the first time since she’d met him, Asher wasn’t running.
He was in this, right here with her, showing her his broken soul and asking her not to run either. Pressure built in her middle, and she cried out with every thrust as he pulled her down on his dick harder and harder.
He snarled and gripped the back of her neck, rested her forehead against his as she broke apart, her orgasm pulsing hard. Asher rammed into her and gritted out her name as he shot warmth into her. Over and over, he throbbed inside of her, filling her up until he huffed a shaky breath and pulled her tight against him. And as their aftershocks pounded on, he didn’t move. He sat there frozen, holding her, breath quick, body tense.
The fog was receding back into him in thick plumes that looked like the aftermath of a burning house. He didn’t grunt in pain or wince away. He just absorbed it, while she lifted her fingertips into the air and stared in awe at the cerulean blue that blanketed her skin. It was moving and transparent, like mist on an early morning.
“You know when you asked me my favorite color?” Asher said softly.
“Yeah.”
“I’ve changed my mind.”
She smiled at him. Already aware of his answer, she asked anyway. “What is your new favorite color?”
Asher flattened her palm, his eyes on the thin veil of blue that hovered above it. And suddenly, he touched the edge of the blue, then lifted his fingers away in a quick gesture. A wolf rose from the mist. Ashlyn’s heart was in her throat as she watched the tiny figure running in place on her palm.
“Now, my favorite color is blue,” he murmured.
The words didn’t match, but Asher had just told her something incredibly important.
He’d just said, “I care for you deeply,” in the only way he knew how.
Chapter Ten
“Do you come here often?” Ashlyn asked. “Spelled C-U-M
.” She giggled at her own joke.
Asher snorted and rolled his head toward her on the pillow, then pulled her closer against his side. “To ten-ten? Never. It’s the first time I’ve been back to Rangeley at all since my dad disowned me.”
With a frown, Ashlyn lifted her head and rested her chin on his chest. That sounded like an awful thing to go through. “He disowned you?”
Asher brushed her flyaway hair behind her ear and nodded. “Me and Roman both.”
“Why?”
Her head rose with his ribcage as he inhaled deeply. Eyes on her hair as he stroked it back, he murmured, “I dated someone I shouldn’t. So did my brother. It was against the rules, but I didn’t agree with them.”
“Did you love her?”
Asher nodded once. “I think so. She was the only before…”
“Before what?”
“Before you. Her name was Genevieve. I called her Gen. She wasn’t scared of me. Lived a couple towns over with her dad and older brother. Her instincts were broken. They were too small. She would let me get away with things she should’ve questioned, and I thought that was love, so I took risks to be with her. My mom wasn’t in my life, and my dad had chosen a favorite son in Gentry. I grew up different. Lonely. Quiet. I wanted someone to care about me, and it didn’t really matter who it was. I just needed one person.”
“And Genevieve was your person?”
Asher shook his head. “I made Gen sick the longer I was with her. Body sick and head sick. I couldn’t stop myself from…”
“From what?”
Asher lifted his bright blue gaze to Ashlyn’s. “I couldn’t stop feeding on her. I didn’t have the control.”
Ashlyn swallowed hard. “What do you mean feeding on her?”
“Gen’s color was green.”
Ashlyn looked at her hand where she’d seen the blue mist earlier. “What happened to her?”
“I tried to break it off when I saw how bad she was getting. I tried to stay away, but she would come to Rangeley, begging me to be with her, and I would give in every single time because I thought if she wanted to be with me despite the monster in me, then it really was love. I had such a craving for it. To feel cared about. To feel…anything. She got worse. Skinny, pale, sick to her stomach all the time, didn’t have any energy to do the things she loved. Her dad was so worried. He asked me to leave her alone. He didn’t know what I was, but he had some instinct that told him I was the one killing his daughter.”