by T. S. Joyce
“How do you know?”
Asher tapped his temple with the tip of his finger. “I can hear people I know well. I was close to her father. I wished he was my dad most days. Her dad was scared of me at the end. So I broke it off for good. I was determined because, if I didn’t end it right then, I was going to kill her. Only she didn’t stay away. She came to a meeting with my dad and his people, and she outed our relationship. And the next day, my dad disowned me and Roman both for shaming our family name. For shaming our people. For shaming ourselves.”
“Just because of who she was?”
“No, Ashlyn. You should know everything. Not because of who Gen was, but because of what she was.”
“What was she?” Ashlyn whispered, her blood chilled to ice.
“Human.”
“Jesus,” Ashlyn muttered, sitting up straight in the bed. She rubbed her hands rapidly up and down her arms to settle the gooseflesh there. “Asher, when you said you were all those things—incubus and empath and taker and wolf—you really meant you aren’t human? What is The Taker? What does that mean?”
“It means I have something in me that takes life to live, Ashlyn.”
“You’re scaring me.”
“You should be scared,” he gritted out, sitting up. “You should be screaming, sprinting for your car, leaving your goddamned luggage here in your rush to get away from me.”
“Are you feeding on me?”
Asher reared back like he’d been slapped. “What?”
“Answer me. Are you feeding on me?”
“That’s not the only—”
“Dammit, Asher. Just answer the question. Are. You. Feeding. On. Me?”
“I have.”
Her eyes rimmed with tears, but she forced herself to hold his blazing gaze. “When?”
“Whenever you feel sick, that’s me. That’s The Taker.”
She went over every moment since she’d come here. “So when you were with me in bed, and in the coffee shop?”
Asher made a tick sound behind his teeth and twitched his head. His eyes turned fiery in an instant, but he looked away. “The coffee shop was an accident. I was hurting Amanda, but you were too close. That wasn’t for you. I haven’t wanted to feed on you since I left your bed that first morning. I sat outside the door and gagged as I listened to the pained sounds you were making. And suddenly the blue that I thought would taste so good was like cement in my stomach. That was the moment.”
“What moment?”
Asher tossed her a fiery glare. “That was the moment you became safe from me. The Taker shrank to nothing inside of me. It was the first time it felt shame. Regret. Remorse. It was the first time it thought of anything other than its own survival. That was the moment The Taker became The Giver, but only for you.”
Ashlyn’s eyes were leaking now, tears streaming down her cheeks as she curled in on herself and squeezed her hand into a fist—the one he’d taken the pain away from. “I’m supposed to leave tomorrow, remember? I’m supposed to leave, and you’re saying all these things that make me want to stay and see everything you can do.”
“Oh, you want to see how dark I can be?”
“No,” she whispered around her tightening throat. “I want to see what kind of love you are capable of, Asher.”
She’d never seen a man more stunned in her entire life than Asher was right now. He sat frozen beside her, staring at her with wide, almost snow-white eyes, his blond brows lifted high.
“I don’t fall easy,” she admitted. “I never have. I don’t like to attach to people, but for some reason, I feel safe attaching to you.”
Asher shook his head in denial and warned, “Ashlyn—”
“No, let me finish before you try to convince me my instincts are broken like Genevieve’s were. My eyes are open now, Asher. You’ve told me some of the real, and it’s scary. Not for me, but I’m scared for all you shoulder. What a terrible burden on one man. But you’ve been doing it, and I fully believe these abilities were given to you because no one else would be strong enough to contain and control them. You’re a monster, Asher, of that I’m certain.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “But you feel like my monster.”
Asher’s lips turned up into a wicked smile in the moment before his lips collided with hers. His kiss was explosive, firing from her lips down through her body one cell at a time, making her feel like she was glowing from the inside out. He ripped the covers off her lap and settled gracefully between the cradle of her thighs in a blur. So fast. So powerful. His hand was rough in the back of her hair as he pulled her face closer in desperation. And she got it. She was thirsty for him, too. When Asher slid into her, she cried out against his lips. God, he felt so good like this, taking her without hesitation. The gentle Asher from earlier was gone, and in his place was a rutting man as desperate as her to connect after those huge secrets had been exposed and left them both raw.
His abs flexed against her soft belly as he bucked into her harder and faster. My monster.
“Say it,” he ground out, ramming into her again.
“My monster,” she whispered through a naughty grin.
Asher rolled his eyes closed like those two words felt good, then pushed her knee back toward her ribcage and thrust into her deeper. Ashlyn lost her mind with how big and good he felt inside of her and dug her nails into his back.
“You better fucking make it count if you’re gonna use your claws.” Asher’s voice was deep and gravelly, and there was a snarl in his chest that pushed her even closer to climax. Too fast. They were both on a collision course to Hell, but not tonight. Not right now. Right now, in this moment, everything was ecstasy, and the future seemed so far away.
Ashlyn dragged her nails down his back hard, and her man hissed softly behind his teeth and pushed into her faster. He lowered his chest to hers. Ashlyn cradled his head and then pulled his hair as he slammed into her again and again. His arms were so strong around her, so tight. There was no black fog, and no blue. It was just her and Asher here in the dark.
Her body shattered like broken mirror glass. She’d never felt anything like it. Sooo good, perfect, her orgasm blasted through her middle, gripping his dick in quick, pounding pulses. Asher pushed into her deep and froze. Warmth spilled into her, and then there were his teeth, right on her neck, gentle but sexy. Bitey…
Mate.
Bitey mate. Mate?
Yes, Ashlyn. Mine.
Asher?
I love, love you. I love you. Love. Fuck, you’re so perfect. Beautiful. Brave girl. Love you.
She was so high on endorphins, she couldn’t feel any fear right now. Asher was in her head. It didn’t feel invasive. It felt intimate to share their release, their bodies, their minds.
And when their throbbing aftershocks had faded away, Asher let off a breath and kissed her gently. A couple nips on her lip, and then he rolled over, pulling her with him.
“You don’t have to say it back,” he murmured in the dark.
Ashlyn smiled and cuddled against her monster’s chest.
“You want to know my new favorite color?” she asked softly, careful not to wreck the magic of the moment.
Asher kissed the top of her hair. “I want to know everything.”
Ashlyn smiled and kissed the base of his throat. And for reasons she didn’t understand, she bit him gently there.
When at last she eased away, Ashlyn whispered, “Now, my favorite color is black.”
Chapter Eleven
Asher was standing out in the snow in front of the porch, blasting logs into bits for the fireplace. Tall as a tank, strong legs pressing against his jeans, his dark gray sweater lifting just enough to expose the bottom set of his abs every time he arced the ax back. Thick biceps flexing with every swing. Between swings, Asher couldn’t seem to keep those sexy blue eyes off her. That, and he kept smiling to himself. She was tickled that he was obviously smitten with her, and also really turned on. Asher’s smile was brighter than the sun. It took
her breath away.
“Enjoying the view?” Asher grunted as he swung the ax down onto the log.
“Very much. This is fulfilling all of my pervy lumberjack fantasies. I’ll keep this locked in the vault for years.” Ashlyn took a loud sip of her cherry cheesecake latte and looked at him primly as she pushed herself languidly on the swing with the toe of her boot.
He nudged a split log off the chopping block and replaced it with a new one. He’d gotten a whole tree from somewhere and dragged it up to the house, then taken a chainsaw to it in sections. Ashlyn didn’t see a tractor or anything, so she assumed Asher also had super-cyborg strength, too. Sexy, because he was gentle with her, even though he could likely pop her like a water balloon.
Asher chuckled.
“Out of my head, mister!” she reprimanded him.
“A water balloon?”
Ashlyn thought hard about the grossest things she could think about. Plain oatmeal, dung-beetles rolling up poop balls, smelly dumpsters, Butt-Grab Gary trying to kiss her with his mouth wide open in the broken elevator at work…
“Okay, okay,” Asher said, shaking his head. “I’m out.” He bent and scooped up an armload of split logs like they weighed nothing.
It didn’t look that hard, so Ashlyn set her drink down on the porch and threw the blanket off her lap, then pushed off the swing and made her way down the stairs. She filled her arms, but the wood was heavy, so it took her longer to settle it up on the pile where Asher was stacking the logs.
“You’re so fucking cute,” he said as he passed her. And to her surprise and delight, he kissed her hard and grabbed her ass, also hard. The devil was in his smile as he eased away and gave her a sexy-boy wink before he made his way back for another load.
Stunned by the unexpected affection, Ashlyn brushed the tip of her mittens against her lips. She loved the way he tasted and adored the way his lips always melted perfectly to hers.
“Asher?”
“Mmm?” he rumbled as he loaded his arms up again.
“Where did you get the latte? And the cinnamon rolls?”
The cup was the kind that could be purchased at the grocery store, so she’d thought perhaps he’d begged it off Blaire while Ashlyn was getting ready for the day.
“I went into town while you were in the shower. You deserve breakfast.”
“Because I slept with you?”
He chuckled and made his way toward her with another armful of wood. “No, Ash. Because you’re sweet, beautiful, and caring, and you make me feel different.”
Swoon. Her legs wanted to buckle, but while he was being so open, she was going to pounce. “Feel different how?” she asked coyly.
Asher gave her a dark grin. “Like I don’t want to kill everything.”
“Mmm,” she purred. “Romantic serial-killer poetry to my ears.”
“Hey, you can still run.”
Ashlyn looked down at her phone to check the time. “Hey look, my battery is at sixty-nine percent!”
“Favorite number?”
“Yep!”
“God, you’re perfect.”
“And you’re a sappy romantic, mister. I didn’t call that one.”
Asher unloaded the wood to the pile and took a minute organizing it into neat rows before he turned to her and leaned back against it, arms crossed. “Only with you, Ashlyn. People are hard. I don’t understand them because I’ve had to stay separate. I don’t have a lot of experience with relationships. But with you…” He shrugged up one shoulder.
“But with me what?”
“You’re easy.”
“Thank you,” she said, curtseying.
Asher rolled his eyes heavenward and then grinned at her. “Not like that, I’m not calling you easy.”
“What if my new year’s resolution was to be looser with men, and you just gave me a compliment, and then took it away?”
“Do you want me to feel bad?”
“Yes. Terrible. Maybe you should eat the rest of the pile of fifty cinnamon rolls before we go to your friend’s house so you don’t feel like feeding on me today. How many did you think I could eat?”
“I don’t know. Maybe eight of them?”
“Eight?” she whisper-screamed. “They are the size of my head!”
“My people eat a lot. And the cinnamon rolls won’t help. I could eat thirty of them. The human side of me would be full, but The Taker is a different part of me. It needs different food.”
“Or you get sick?”
“Or I get weak, and I can’t control myself.”
“Well, that blows.”
He snorted and hooked his hands on his hips, stared at the sky as he seemed to try and get ahold of his laughter. “You’re so weird. None of this should be funny or okay with you. You should be freaking out.”
Ashlyn lifted her sparkly pink rhinestone phone and shook it gently. “I have a freak-out penciled into my calendar for this afternoon. Prepare thyself. I will spiral hard.”
“Will you cry?”
“Oh, sob. Just…curl up in a ball in the snow, and I’ll wail phrases that don’t make any sense like, ‘I always pick bad boys, and this one eats everything and gives me tummy aches, but he’s good with his hands, and blue-hoo-hooooo.”
“Stop,” Asher said, trying not to crack into a grin.
“If I pay you thirty dollars, will you come to my office and kiss me in front of Butt-Grab Gary and scare him away?”
“Gary will end up a dry gray corpse if you introduce me to him. Still want to pay me to visit?”
“Kind of,” she mumbled, texting Blaire she was about to leave for an adventure with Sexy Asher the Panty Basher. “Gary’s really gross.”
Asher lifted her off her feet so fast she squealed. In a rush, she ended up thrown over his massive shoulder, his hand smacking her ass so hard the sound echoed through the clearing.
“Asher! Fucker! You’re going to leave a hand print!”
He nipped her side and chuckled remorselessly. Okay, from way up here, she was beginning to realize just how tall Asher was. And whooo, that butt looked good as he strode toward his truck parked in the middle of the parking lot. “How much do you weigh?”
“Isn’t that rude to ask?” Asher muttered in an amused tone.
“For girls.”
“How much do you weigh?”
She whispered her weight into his ear, and he laughed a booming sound, and said, “I weigh twice as much as you.”
“Yeah, I could tell in the bedroom last night. I was almost a smear on the mattress after you finished with me.”
Asher cracked up and oh, he had a great laugh. It was the deep, booming kind from low down in his belly that said he meant it when laughed at her jokes.
Blaire had texted back. Bouncing gently over his shoulder with the cadence of his gait, Ashlyn squinted her eyes and tried to focus enough to read it. Suddenly, Asher skidded to a stop, sliding slightly on the icy concrete.
Ashlyn twisted around to find Gentry, Roman, Mila, and Blaire standing near Asher’s truck, dressed in warm clothes, and staring like she and Asher had turned into a pair of jumbo shrimps. Maybe her butt looked weird.
“Did I rip my pants?” she asked in a higher pitch than she’d intended.
“Uuuuh,” Asher stumbled, setting her down quickly on her feet and then steadying her by placing her right in front of him and gripping her shoulders. “This is Ashlyn.”
Roman narrowed his eyes. “Yeah, we know, dumbass. We’ve hung out with her.”
More staring, and behind her, Asher’s body was humming. Right. Ashlyn cleared her throat loudly. “We like holding hands, and he thinks my jokes are funny.”
“I don’t understand,” Gentry drawled out slowly.
Ashlyn sighed dramatically and spelled it out for them. “He’s my monster. Any nay-sayers can fuck off. I like him.”
“Oh, so you want to die,” Roman said, nodding. “Awesome.”
Blaire stuck up for her. “She’s made her decision, she�
��s a grown ass woman, she likes him, everything will probably be fine.”
If she was closer, Ashlyn would’ve given her a high five, but at this distance, she scrunched up her face and nodded her head in a silent thank you Blaire would understand.
“Plus,” Blaire continued, “I know Ashlyn. If you tell her no, she’ll only hold onto him tighter.”
“It’s true,” Ashlyn told Roman blandly. “I sink my claws in because I can’t help myself.”
“What are you doing out here?” Asher asked.
“We were all supposed to hang out today, remember?” Gentry arched his eyebrows high. “Pick up the liquor license for Winter’s Edge and go out to lunch together. As a group. Family meal. Any of this ringing a bell? I texted you yesterday.”
“I haven’t checked my phone. I’ve been…occupied.”
The way he said that last word made Ashlyn want to lean back against him and rub her butt against his crotch seductively. If she was a cat right now, she would be purring. She liked occupying Asher.
“We’re going to meet Odine,” Ashlyn explained. “Can we meet up for lunch after?”
Gentry offered her a slow blink, then lifted a pissed-off glare to Asher behind her. “Seriously?”
“You should come with us to see her,” Asher said low.
“No thanks, we like survival,” Roman uttered, draping an arm around Mila’s shoulders and pulling her close to his side.
Behind Ashlyn, Asher sighed, and his grip tightened on her shoulders. “There’s something you should know about her. Get in the truck.”
Roman smiled and lifted his middle finger.
“Now,” Asher said, but his voice was different. Gruffer and more demanding, and the effect on the others was instant. With jerky, uncoordinated movements, the others began to move toward the truck.
“Fuckin’ Asherhole,” Roman grumbled. But his middle finger didn’t seem to be working anymore so he was just holding up a fist. “I call shotgun.”