Music of the Heart

by Katie Ashley

  I had just hung up with my mom when a nurse came out to tell me that Abby was upstairs and I could see her. The entire elevator ride up I waged war on myself for what had happened. I played a thousand “what-if” scenarios in my mind of why I hadn’t ensured there were more security or insisted that Frank walk Abby all the way to the bus. Most of all, I wondered how I ever let someone like Bree weasel her way into my life and my bed.

  When I got to Abby’s room, I hesitated outside of the door. I couldn’t help but be afraid of what I might find once I got inside. Guilt continued crisscrossing its way through my chest. The sins of my past had come barreling into my future and almost destroyed my perfect happiness. With a gutted feeling, I pushed open the door.

  The room flickered in shadows as only the dim light over Abby’s bed lit the room. Even in the dark, I could see the extent of her injuries. Just the sight of the angry purple and green bruises along with Abby’s swollen face made me feel like someone had kicked me in the balls. Bending over, I braced my hands on my knees and tried stilling my out-of -control emotions by taking several deep breaths.

  At Abby’s whimper, I jerked my head up. “Angel?” I questioned before striding over to her bedside. I took her hand that was bandaged with IV’s in mine. “Angel, I’m here, and I love you.”

  Her eyes stayed pinched closed, but her brows furrowed. “Just rest, baby. You’re safe now, and I’m not leaving you.”

  At her continued restlessness, I considered calling the nurse’s station and asking for more pain medication. But then an idea flashed through my mind, so I acted on it. Drawing the chair close to the bed, I eased down. I then began singing Angel again to Abby just like I had earlier. Almost instantly, she calmed and began to rest more peacefully.

  I continued singing different songs to her until my voice was hoarse, and my eyelids drooped in exhaustion. Laying my head down on the side of the bed, I fell asleep with my head nestled against her hip.

  Rays of amber sunshine bursting through the window blinds stung my eyes and woke me from my sleep. Raising my head, I looked at Abby. Some of the swelling had gone down in her face, but the bruises were just as bad. I was about to go to the bathroom when she moaned. At the fluttering of her eyelids, I leaned forward. “Angel?”

  Her eyes flew wide open. She turned her head to look at me and winced in pain. “Jake…”

  “Are you hurting? Let me get the nurse for you.”

  “No, that’s okay. I just feel woozy and really sore.”

  I nodded. “You’re in the hospital. Do you remember what happened?”

  “Bree tried to kill me,” she replied hoarsely.

  “Yes.”

  “But I’m okay?”

  I filled her in on everything Dr. Mitchell had said. Then taking her hand in mine, I squeezed it tight before bringing it to my lips and bestowing kisses across the back of her hand and fingers. “I’m so, so sorry for what happened to you, Angel.”

  “But it wasn’t your fault.”

  “Yes, it is. If I hadn’t ever been involved with Bree, she would have never gone after you like that.” Ashamed of the remorseful tears burning my eyes, I buried my face on the side of the bed. “I ruin everything for you.”

  “No you don’t.”

  Raising my head, I stared sadly at her. “Yes, I do. I’ll never be good enough for you.”

  “Stop it, Jake. I don’t want you beating yourself up over this.” She reached out to run her fingers over my cheek. “You gave me the most romantic night of my life—you told a crowd of fifty thousand people that I was the girl you loved most in the world and that my love had saved you. Nothing that happened will ever take that moment away from me.”

  I groaned. “You go and say shit like that and make me realize for the millionth time that you’re way too good for me.”

  Abby gave a slight shake of her head. “You stayed with me last night?”

  “Of course.”

  She tried to smile at me, but the stiches in her lip made it more of a grimace. “Just when I think I couldn’t love you more than I already do, you go and prove me wrong.”

  “Listen, Angel, you’re going to have a long recovery ahead of you—maybe six weeks. I want you to come to my farm and let me take care of you.”

  Abby’s eyes widened. “No, Jake, I can’t let you do that. You have too much going on with your mom.”

  I shook my head. “This isn’t up for discussion, Angel. I’m not letting you out of my sight. I intended on seeing you through your recovery every step of the way.”

  “But what about your mom?”

  I grinned. “It was her suggestion in the first place.” When Abby started to protest, I replied, “She and I both want to do this very much, Angel. Besides, she knows all about my love for you. In fact, she was the one who told me to keep fighting for you after I screwed up.”

  “Really?”

  “Yes, so there’s no point in arguing, okay?”

  Happy acceptance entered Abby’s eyes. “Thank you. I would love to spend that time with you.”

  “Good, I’m glad to hear it.” I rose up to tenderly kiss her forehead. It was one of the only places that wasn’t bruised or cut. With a grin, I added, “Since we’re off tour for a while and recording the album, you can let me know which songs are good or which ones suck.”

  “I highly doubt any of them will suck.”

  “That’s debatable.” I brought her hand to cup my cheek. “Maybe we can work on some more collaborations?”

  “I’d like that a lot.” Her fingers brushed against the stubble on my skin. “I like anything that means I get to be with you.”

  “Right back at ya, Angel,” I replied with a smile.

  Our beautiful moment came to a screeching halt when the door burst open, and Abby’s parents rushed in. “Oh Abigail sweetheart!” her mother, Laura, cried as she practically elbowed me out of the way to get to Abby. Tears streamed down her face as she hovered between wanting to hug Abby and knowing better. Finally, she grabbed Abby’s hand.

  “Mom, it’s worse than it looks. I’m going to be just fine.”

  “We just spoke with the doctor, and it seems pretty bad to me,” her father, Andrew, replied. His expression hardened as his gaze honed in on me. His dark eyes narrowed at the sight of my t-shirt stained with Abby’s blood along with the tattoos peeking out from under my sleeves. Without even a hello or an introduction, he demanded, “How could you let this happen?”

  My hand automatically flew up in surrender. “Mr. Renard, I’m terribly sorry for what happened to Abby. I never meant for her to get hurt because of me,” I replied as sincerely as I could.

  Apparently my words had little effect on him. He abandoned Abby’s other side and rounded the bed towards me. “It’s no secret that my wife and I are less than pleased about this infatuation that Abigail seems to have with you. Your reputation as a womanizer and heavy drinker certainly makes you the last young man on earth we would want our daughter being associated with.”

  “Daddy!” Abby admonished. Raising her voice caused her to grimace from the exertion.

  “Stop it! You’re upsetting her!” I shouted as I came to stand toe to toe with him.

  “Don’t you tell me what to do! Abigail is my daughter, and I know what’s best for her,” Andrew countered. He took a step forward to where we were practically nose to nose. “The moment she’s released from the hospital I intend to take her back to Texas where she belongs. Hopefully, when she’s far, far away from you, she’ll forget this silly infatuation and come to her senses.”

  I opened my mouth to protest, but Abby beat me to the punch. “Daddy, stop being such an asshole to Jake! And I’m not leaving with you!”

  Andrew’s brows shot so far up in his hairline they practically disappeared. “Excuse me?”

  Abby softened her expression. “I’m sorry, but you’re being disrespectful and rude to the very guy who stayed all night in an uncomfortable chair while I was out cold to make sure I was safe and
not alone.” Abby sighed. “But most of all, you’re breaking my heart by being so cold and thoughtless to the man I love.”

  Both Andrew and Laura’s mouths gaped opened at Abby’s statement. “You two have been the best parents, and all my life you taught me not to judge people and to give everyone, no matter the circumstances, a chance. Now how is it that you’re completely trampling upon everything you instilled in me?”

  “Abigail, it’s just that—” Laura began.

  “No, you’re stereotyping and judging Jake by rumor and what you think you see. But he’s so much more than just a rocker. He has a tender heart and a giving soul. If you only knew the love and affection he has for his mother, his bandmates and even the crew who works for him, you would see that he is someone you should like and respect.”

  Andrew ran a shaky hand through his hair while Laura stared wide-eyed at me. Just like Abby, she nibbled her bottom lip when she was nervous and was waiting for the courage to say what she needed. “Do you truly love Abby?” Laura asked.

  “Yes, ma’am, I do. I love her with all my heart and soul. I intend on working my ass—” I cleared my throat at my language choice, “Uh, I mean, butt off the rest of my life to prove that I’m worthy of her and her love.”

  “Oh that’s so sweet,” Laura gushed to which Andrew only grunted.

  “Daddy, you know that I love you both, and I’m not going to do anything to hurt you or disappoint you. Just like I told before to you about Jake, I am an adult, and I have to live my life. And right now I chose to spend my recovery time with him.”

  Her words sent a beaming smile to my lips. I was so fucking proud of her for being so strong. I couldn’t have loved my girl more for standing up for me and herself.

  “But Abby, we want to be with you while you’re healing. I can’t bear the thought of just abandoning you.”

  Tentatively, I reached out to touch Laura’s arm. “You won’t have to do that. You and Mr. Renard are more than welcome to stay at my farm for as long as you like.”

  Laura’s expression warmed at the thought. “Really? You wouldn’t mind?”

  “Of course not. Abby needs her parents around her.” I gave a pointed look at Andrew.

  After a few seconds of staring each other down, he finally sighed resignedly. “I do apologize for any wrong doing on my part.” He held out his hand to me. “I believe we were never formally introduced. I’m Andrew Renard.”

  “Jake Slater,” I replied as I pumped his hand up and down.

  Although I knew he hated it, a smile filled his face as he added, “It’s a pleasure meeting you.”

  “Likewise.”

  “You guys really make me happy,” Abby said.

  “Anything for you, sweetheart,” Laura replied.

  Abby winced. “Good. Because I really need some more pain medicine.”

  Even though I wanted to, I held back and let Andrew punch the button for the nurse. I figured it was just another set of baby steps along the way to building our relationship.

  ***

  For the next month, I spent my recovery at Jake’s farm. Although I was wrecked physically, I don’t know when I’d been happier emotionally. Sure, I didn’t necessarily want to almost be beaten to death by a psychotic, jealous ex-lover of Jake’s, but in the same token, it meant I had time to spend with him and with his mom. The first week my parents stayed in the guest bedroom while I stayed next door in Jake’s bedroom. Although the barn boasted a finished loft that was as nicer than any apartment, Jake refused to sleep far from me, so he either slept in the chair beside my bed or on the couch in the living room. I’d offered to let him sleep with me, but he was too afraid of accidentally hitting or kicking my wounds during the night.

  That first week I was smothered to death by Jake, my parents, and Susan. Even Rhys, Brayden, Lily, and AJ hovered over me. Don’t get me wrong. It was nice milking my injuries for my favorite home-cooked meals of my mother’s or little gifts from the guys. But after a while, it got really old being spoiled. I couldn’t even sneeze without everyone freaking out and rushing to my bedside. It was sweet, but it was also incredibly annoying.

  Once I was literally back on my feet again, my parents reluctantly left to go back to Texas. They’d spent ten days away from their jobs to make sure I was on the road to recovery. They still weren’t happy with me recuperating at Jake’s, but they had resigned themselves to the fact that I was an adult and made my own decisions. We had a teary goodbye where I promised to come home at the end of the month.

  Some days Jake would reluctantly leave me with Susan, so he could go to Atlanta with the guys to work on the new album. I had to admit that I enjoyed the time with her. She was truly an amazing woman of strength and courage. Physically, she had her good days and bad days, but emotionally she was upbeat each and every day. She was also really funny. When I felt up to riding in a car again, she took me to her dance studio and showed me around. Jake’s family came in droves to meet me and to bring home-cooked meals to Susan and to Jake. I’d never felt so much love outside of my own immediate family.

  One afternoon after Jake got in from the recording studio in Atlanta, he found Susan and me on the front porch each reading a book. With a beaming smile on his face, he beckoned me with his hand. “I have a surprise for you.”

  Wrinkling my nose, I replied, “You know I hate surprises.”

  “You’ll like this one. It’s a special gift from my grandfather.” It didn’t escape me that a knowing look passed between Susan and Jake.

  Reluctantly, I pulled myself out of the chair and walked down the length of the porch to meet Jake. He took my hand in his and led me across the yard to his barn. When he opened the door, a fluffy ball of a Golden Retriever puppy came galloping over to me.

  My eyes widened in shock. “You got me a dog?”

  “It’s a gift from my Papa. She’s the pick of his new litter.”

  I squealed with delight as I went to pick up the puppy. “She’s beautiful,” I murmured as I rubbed my face into the soft fur.

  “Does that mean you like my surprise?”

  I grinned. “Oh I love this one.”

  Jake tipped back his baseball cap off his forehead and eyed me. “So what are you going to name her?”

  “Hmm, good question.” I stared into the puppy’s warm brown eyes. “What should I name you, sweetheart?” As she opened her mouth and yawned, it hit me. “Angel. She can be my angel.”

  “But you’re my Angel,” Jake protested.

  “I think there’s room for two Angels around here.”

  “Whatever. She’s your dog.”

  I couldn’t help my brow creasing in worry. “But what happens when I have to leave or go back on the road?”

  Jake shrugged. “She’ll just stay here with all our other dogs until you get back.”

  My heartbeat hammered so loud I feared Jake would hear it. I didn’t know if he realized that by saying my dog would always have a home at his house, he had just alluded to a massive level of commitment between us. “Are you sure that wouldn’t be an imposition?” I finally asked.

  “Of course not. I mean, we have all these fenced in acres for her to run around and frolic in.”

  I giggled. “Did you just say frolic?”

  “Yeah, I did, smartass,” he replied with a smirk.

  Setting Angel gently down on the floor, I then put my arms around Jake’s neck. “Thank you so much for the sweet and thoughtful gift. You made my day.”

  He grinned. “You’re welcome.”

  I leaned in and gave him a lingering kiss. Since the night I had been beaten by Bree, Jake had been gun-shy about kissing or touching me. More than anything in the world, I wanted his mouth and hands on me again like the night in the hotel room. I slid my tongue against his lips, urging him to open to me. When he did, I thrust my tongue against his. Surprisingly, Jake ran his hand down my back and cupped one of my butt cheeks, jerking me against him.

  As our tongues danced around each other, I
brazenly rubbed myself against the bulge growing in his jeans. I hiked one of my legs up and wrapped it around his hip, giving him part of his former wish to have my cowboy boots digging into his ass. Since I wanted to give him and myself the full experience, I melted against Jake, silently begging with my body language for him to raise me up. Fortunately, he appeased me by cupping my other butt cheek and hoisting me up to wrap my other leg around his waist. I arched my center against his crotch, causing him to groan into my mouth. “Angel,” he murmured as he kissed a scorching trail down my neck.

  When his hand moved up my ribcage to cup my breast, I cried out. Thinking it was from pain, not pleasure, Jake froze. My vocal reaction had the same effect as pouring a bucket of ice cold water over Jake. “Oh fuck,” he muttered before gripping my hips and unwrapping my legs from around his waist. Once he sat my feet back on the ground, he ran a shaky hand through his hair.

  “Jake, please don’t stop!” I protested.

  He shook his head. “You’re not fully healed. I hurt you.”

  “No, you didn’t. I cried out because I liked what I was feeling.”

  He stared at me for a minute. “It doesn’t matter. We shouldn’t be making out anyway.”

  Cupping his cheek, I argued, “But I want to make out with you. You’re my boyfriend, and I love you.”

  Staring down at Angel playing at our feet, Jake refused to meet my gaze. “No, we don’t. Not now and not any time soon,” he muttered before stalking out of the barn. Angel started after him, but then she came back to me. I pulled her into my arms and let the tears rolling down my cheeks dampen her fur.

  I didn’t see Jake the rest of the afternoon until Susan called us to dinner at seven. To say that you could have cut the tension in the air with a knife would be a mild understatement. Susan chattered along, and I tried keeping up with her while Jake sat in a broody silence, shoveling in his food. Our plates were half-eaten when he sprang out of his chair. When Susan and I stared up at him with our mouths open in surprise, he muttered, “I’m going to the barn to work out.”