“Let’s go, please,” she’d said to Miguel, continuing down the hall toward the bank of elevators, trusting that he would follow.
She kept walking, even though she felt sick inside. She’d just walked out on the only person she’d ever loved, the only person she’d ever trusted enough to let inside.
“Beth?”
She glanced at Miguel, blinking as if coming out of a daze. He looked as awful as she felt. “I’m sorry, what?”
“I’ve known Shane a long time,” Miguel said. “He’s – ”
“Please don’t,” she said. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“He’s a good guy. Maybe he screwed up, but that doesn’t mean – ”
“Miguel.” She gave him a quelling look.
“Just think about it, okay?” Miguel said. “Don’t make any hasty decisions.”
“It’s too late for that,” she said, as the elevator doors opened.
* * *
Miguel stopped at Beth’s house so she could pick up her purse. Then he drove her to the library, pulling up right to the main entrance to let her out.
She opened the car door. “Thank you for the ride.”
Miguel shrugged off her gratitude. “No need to thank me.”
Her anger flared anew. “Right. You’re just doing your job.”
Miguel frowned. “I would’ve done it anyway, Beth,” he said.
Beth instantly regretted taking her hurt out on him. He’d been nothing but kind to her, and he didn’t deserve her animosity. She should direct her ire at the people who deserved it, namely her brother and Shane.
Miguel grabbed a spare napkin tucked into the car console and jotted down a number. “Call me if you need anything, Beth. I mean it.”
Her brows wrinkled in surprise. “You’re not still going to watch me, are you?”
He nodded. “Yes. Until Shane tells me otherwise.”
“And I suppose he’s just doing what he was paid to do, right?” That hurt, knowing that Shane had been paid to be with her. Oh, God, that hurt.
“You’re not just a job to him, Beth,” Miguel said. “Trust me. I’ve worked for Shane for six years, and I’ve never seen him like this. This is personal for him.”
Beth’s eyes teared up again, and she got out of the car and didn’t look back. As she approached the main entrance to the library, she surreptitiously wiped the tears from her face and pasted a thin smile on her face.
Devany greeted her from behind the front reception desk with her usual wide smile. Beth waved at her friend, but couldn’t muster the energy to do much more.
“Beth, hey!” Devany said, motioning Beth to come closer. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” Beth said. “I’m fine.”
Devany shook her head. “You’re not fine. You look awful. What happened?”
Beth’s throat tightened painfully. “I broke up with Shane this morning.”
“What!” Quite a few heads turned their way at the outburst, so Devany lowered her voice. “Why?” she hissed.
Beth shrugged. The situation was far too complicated and far too personal to explain, so she gave her friend the short version. “He lied to me.”
Devany frowned. “Was it a big lie or a little one?”
“Does it matter?”
“I guess it depends on the lie,” Devany said. “But you were so happy! I can’t believe you broke up with him. Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure.” No, I’m not. I probably just made the biggest mistake of my life. “I’ll see you later, okay, Devany? I’m already late.”
“Sure,” Devany said, frowning. “See you later.”
As Beth took the stairs up to the second floor, every step seemed more and more difficult, as if she were trudging through quicksand, sinking deeper with each step. She keyed in her access code and let herself into the secured room, relieved to find it empty. She headed straight for her desk and dropped into her chair, grateful for the opportunity to be alone for a few moments.
For a badly needed distraction, she turned on her computer and watched the monitor flicker to life. When her cell phone chimed with an incoming message, she dug her phone out of her purse and checked the screen. It was a message from Shane.
Did you get to work okay?
Surely he could have asked Miguel for that information; he didn’t need to hear it from her. It was just a ruse to contact her. Part of her was elated that he was reaching out to her, even after what she’d done. The other part of her knew it was futile. Prolonging the contact between them would only make it harder on them both.
Beth silenced her phone and put it back in her purse, and then she stowed her purse in the bottom drawer of her desk. Needing to put some space between herself and that text message, she rose from her chair and paced in the small office, looking for something to do to keep her mind off Shane’s message. It had just dawned on her that she’d missed breakfast that morning. Eating was the last thing she felt like doing, but she knew her stomach would never make it until lunchtime.
Grateful for the fresh pot of coffee on the credenza, she poured herself a cup, adding plenty of sugar and cream. She wasn’t a big coffee drinker, but at least this gave her something to do. She sat down at her desk and had just taken her first sip when the door to the Special Collections room opened and Mary came in carrying a small plate with two bagels and packets of flavored cream cheese.
“I come bearing carbs!” Mary said, smiling triumphantly.
Mary laid the plate on Beth’s desk. “Someone left a huge bag of bagels in the employee lounge this morning. Here, have one.”
Beth took a plain bagel and a packet of cinnamon-flavored cream cheese. “Thanks.”
“What’s wrong?” Mary said.
“Nothing.”
Mary sat on the edge of Beth’s desk. “I hope you never plan to go into the spy business, because you’d suck at it. Your face is an open book. Now, tell me what’s wrong.”
Beth sighed. “I broke up with Shane this morning.”
“Why?” Mary said.
Beth tore off a piece of the bagel and stuck it in her mouth. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Did he cheat on you?”
“No!” Beth said, indignant that Mary would accuse Shane of cheating.
“Then what? What could be so egregious that you’d dump a mega hunk like him? That man is sex on a stick.”
Beth suppressed a grin at Mary’s words. Then she sobered. “He lied to me.”
Mary frowned. “Lied about what?”
Beth sipped her coffee as fresh tears started. “Please, I can’t talk about it right now.”
“Oh, honey, I’m so sorry,” Mary said, reaching out to tuck Beth’s hair behind her ear.
Chapter 36
He was officially a stalker now.
Shane had sent Beth four text messages in the past hour and called her cell twice, and she hadn’t responded once. Miguel had assured him she was in the library; he said he’d dropped her off at the main entrance and watched her walk in, and he hadn’t seen her leave – at least not by the front entrance. But still, Shane needed confirmation that she was there and that she was okay. He couldn’t stop thinking about how she’d looked when she left. Gutted. She’d been absolutely gutted. And it was his God damned fault.
He wanted to go see her for himself – just to be sure she was okay – but he didn’t think she’d appreciate that just yet. She was probably still reeling from what she’d learned this morning. She needed time to process it, and then time to start thinking more clearly. Yes, he’d fucked up, but surely this was something they could get past. What they had together was far too amazing to lose because of one well-intentioned screw-up.
Short of going down to the campus himself, though, or sending Miguel inside to find her, he figured his most expedient option was to contact Mary Reynolds. He dialed her cell phone, hoping like hell she’d answer. Otherwise, he’d have no choice but to head there himself.
Mary ans
wered on the fourth ring. “Mary Reynolds.”
He could tell from the wary tone of her voice that she already knew. Good, that would simplify things. He spoke in a calm, measured voice. “Mary, this is Shane McIntyre. Please, don’t let Beth know it’s me on the phone.”
“How can I help you?” she said.
“Is Beth there with you?”
“Yes.”
“Is she all right?”
“I’m not too sure about that,” Mary said, her voice clipped.
Shane sighed. Of course she wasn’t all right. “Did she mention that we had a falling out this morning?”
“Yes, something along those lines.”
“I take it she’s right there,” Shane said. “You can’t speak freely?”
“That’s right.”
“The reason I called you was to make sure she was there, and that she’s all right. She was upset this morning when we parted, and she won’t answer my texts or phone calls. I just wanted to be sure she’s all right.”
“I guess you could say that,” Mary said.
“Thank you,” Shane said. “Please call me if there’s a problem.”
“I’ll do that. Thanks for calling.” And then she ended the call.
Shane was debating whether or not to send Beth another text message when someone rapped sharply on his office door.
“Come in,” he said.
“Hey, brother.” Jake walked into Shane’s office, shutting the door behind him. He made himself comfortable in one of the chairs in front of Shane’s desk. “So, what’s new?”
“Cut the crap, Jake,” Shane said, amazed at how quickly bad news travelled. “Miguel called you?”
“No. Miguel called Liam, and Liam called me. Something about the Jamison girl found out about the protection order and about Kline. Is it true you’ve been screwing her? Do you have any idea what Tyler will do to you when he finds out?”
“I can only guess,” Shane said. “But Tyler is the least of my concerns right now. I’m worried about Beth. She won’t talk to me. She thinks I lied to her.”
Jake leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. “You did lie to her, knucklehead,” he said.
Shane ran his hands through his hair. “I mean intentionally. Jesus, can this day get any worse?”
Jake chuckled. “All right, tell me. What the fuck have you been doing with our client’s little sister? Pardon the pun.”
“It’s simple,” Shane said, leaning back in his chair. “I fell in love with her. End of story.”
Jake’s eyes widened. “You’re shitting me.”
“Nope. And this morning, she told me she was through with me.”
“How’d she find out?”
“Gabrielle.”
Jake nodded his head. “I knew the roommate was a weak link. It was only a matter of time before she squealed.”
“It’s not Gabrielle’s fault. She was just trying to protect Beth. It wasn’t malicious. But now Beth won’t take my calls or respond to my text messages. I’m completely in the dark, and it’s driving me nuts.”
“What are you gonna do? Cut your losses and run, before Tyler gets wind of this?”
“Hell no. I’m going to get her back.”
“Seriously?” Jake said. “Since when have you ever chased after a woman?”
“Since now. I’m not going to lose her, Jake.”
Jake grinned. “Oh, this is going to be interesting, especially once Tyler finds out.”
* * *
The rest of Beth’s morning passed uneventfully. She had two student appointments, she answered some e-mails, and she packed up a collection of periodicals that were due to be shipped back to Johns Hopkins Medical Center. It was noon by the time she made it back to her desk. She was dying to check her cell phone, but she was afraid of what she’d find. The problem was, she didn’t know which would be worse... if he’d continued trying to contact her, or if he’d given up.
“Do you bring your lunch today?” Mary asked.
“No,” Beth said. With all the excitement that morning, she’d forgotten to bring lunch.
“You need to eat something,” Mary said. “Let’s walk over to the cafeteria and grab something. Or we could go off campus, if you’d prefer.”
Beth didn’t feel like eating anything, but she knew she’d feel even worse if she skipped lunch. Her body wasn’t very forgiving when it came to skipping meals. The last thing she needed today was to pass out from low blood sugar.
“The cafeteria is fine,” Beth said. She really didn’t have the energy to go anywhere else.
As soon as she stepped out of the library, Beth noticed Miguel’s black Mustang parked in the visitor lot in front of the library. When they headed toward the Student Union, Beth glanced back and saw Miguel following on foot. Funny, he must have been following her all over campus and she’d never noticed before. What surprised her now was how oddly comforting it was to know he was there.
The Student Union was a quick 10-minute walk from the library. It felt good to be out in the sunshine and fresh air, and for a few minutes Beth tried to convince herself that she was handling all of this just fine.
She bought a bowl of vegetable soup and a fresh baguette, and Mary got her customary chicken wrap and chips. They sat at one of the window tables.
“Your soup’s getting cold,” Mary said after a while, as Beth stared out the window watching birds squabbling over a birdfeeder.
Beth hadn’t touched her soup. She just didn’t feel like eating. Her body might be here with Mary in the cafeteria, but her heart and mind were elsewhere. “I’m just not hungry,” Beth said. She was also very conscious of the fact that Miguel was seated on the other side of the dining room eating a sandwich. Now that the cat was out of the bag, so to speak, he wasn’t trying to be invisible.
“It might help if you talked about it,” Mary said. “I’m a good listener.”
“I can’t – ” What could she tell Mary without revealing more of her past life than she wanted to? She didn’t like people knowing about what had happened to her. Whenever she told someone, they’d always ended up treating her differently, so she’d stopped telling people. “He withheld some important information from me,” she finally said.
“You said he wasn’t cheating on you,” Mary said.
Beth shook his head. “No, he would never do a thing like that. He has too much integrity.” And then she realized what she’d just said. Shane was an honorable man. He’d always been honest with her about so many things, about his personal life, about his fears for her, about what he wanted them to be to each other. He’d been honest for the most part, and yet he’d kept such vital information from her. It didn’t make sense.
“Okay,” Mary said. “So he didn’t cheat. Is he married?”
“No! It’s nothing like that.”
“Did he intentionally try to mislead you?”
Beth shook her head. “No. It wasn’t intentional. He was just... waiting for the right time to tell me something.”
“So, what happened?”
“Someone beat him to it.”
Mary leaned back in her seat and crossed her arms. “Beth, I’ve never seen you as happy as you’ve been these past couple of weeks. Are you sure you want to end it with him, because of some withheld information? Maybe he would have told you himself, when he thought the time was right. When I met Shane, he struck me as a pretty honorable person.”
“He is,” Beth said, closing her eyes. She covered her face with her hands and groaned. “Oh, God. I don’t know what to think.”
“Think carefully, Beth. Guys like Shane don’t come around every day, you know. Maybe you should give him another chance.”
The rest of the day dragged. Beth had several afternoon student appointments, she cataloged some new arrivals to the collection, and she took several phone calls. One of them was from Gabrielle.
“Are you okay?” Gabrielle said.
“No, not really.”
; “I’m sorry about this morning,” Gabrielle said. “I shouldn’t have told you like that. I just – well, when you said you were falling in love with him, I guess I just lost it. I thought you should know the truth about what you were getting into. I’m really sorry, Beth. I feel terrible.”
“It’s okay. I don’t blame you. It’s Tyler who kept the information from me. Tyler and Shane.”
“I can take the evening off from work tonight and stay home with you. We can have dinner together and just hang out, maybe watch a movie.”
“No, that’s okay. Thanks for the offer, but I don’t want you to miss work on my account. I’ll be fine.”
* * *
“I’ll do the mailroom run,” Mary said late in the afternoon. “I’ll be back.”
After Mary left, Beth dug her cell phone out of her purse and checked her messages for the first time since morning. There were ten texts from Shane, as well as three missed calls. A glutton for punishment, she scrolled through the texts.
Did you get to work okay?
I’m sorry.
Beth, please talk to me.
I was going to tell you. I was just waiting for the right time. There was no easy way to tell you.
I was afraid you’d bolt when I told you, so I kept putting it off.
Please don’t punish me like this. I’m sorry.
Would you at least send me a message, so I know you’re okay?
Would it kill you to throw me a bone? Just say something. Anything.
Okay, I’m officially groveling now. Tell me what you need from me. I can fix this.
I love you.
Beth could barely finish reading his messages for the tears obscuring her vision. She put her phone back in her purse and closed her desk drawer. There was no way she could listen to his voice messages. If she heard his voice right then, she’d lose it completely. Right now, it was all she could do to make it through the last hour of the day. And then she could go home and have a melt-down in private.
Vulnerable: (McIntyre Security Bodyguard Series - Book 1) Page 32