Tainted by Crazy

by Abby Mccarthy

  “Shit. You didn't drive? Maple, it’s so late. Anything could’ve happened to you.” He stepped out of the doorway and pulled me to his hard chest. I didn’t realize how hard my heart was beating until I collided with his chest. “Not saying I’m not glad you’re here, but you’re hurt. What happened?”

  “It’s not that bad, really.”

  He grabbed my hand and pulled me inside. Mail, magazines, and various catalogs cluttered the table. A plaid printed couch with several green throws on it was across from that. There was an odd mix of pine sol and cigars lingering in the air. Despite the fact that it was clean, the house was dated. Rys sat me in the vinyl-covered chair. “Where are you hurt?”

  “It’s nothing. Just my knee and my shin. I’m sure it’s fine.” Rys kneeled in front of me and grabbed my leg, lifting it to inspect the damage.

  “Honey,” he sighed. I watched his backside as he moved to the linen closet to retrieve the first aid kit. He pulled up a chair in front of me and grabbed my leg, placing it in his lap, then opened the first aid kit and poured some hydrogen peroxide on a cotton ball. He dabbed my cut knee and shin and then grabbed tweezers and plucked the tiny pieces of rock from my shin. I winced as he then poured more hydrogen peroxide on my leg. A minute later, he was covering it up with a few band-aids. “There, good as new. Well, almost.”

  “Thank you.”

  His hand moved up my calf rubbing it and then slipped higher on my thigh. “You look like you’ve been crying.”

  “I had a night,” I admitted. Even though I knew I needed to talk with Rys, I suddenly wanted to do much more than talk. He was rubbing my leg, but those blue eyes were staring at me intently. I felt naked; exposed. Maybe he saw more of me than I thought.

  “You here in the middle of the night to talk about it?” He was so patient, giving me the opportunity to back out if I needed to.

  “I am, but if you don’t stop rubbing my leg, Keenan Rys, Earl might just hear a different side to me.”

  He grinned and flashed me his dimple. God, I loved that dimple.

  “I’ll be back,” he said and returned a minute later wearing a dark blue Tennessee Titans T-shirt. He swiped his keys from the messy table and then reached his hand out to take mine. “You ready?”

  We walked outside and I couldn't help but limp slightly. Okay, so maybe the cut on my knee was a little more painful than I had originally let on.

  “Maple,” Rys jerked my hand, stopping me.

  “What?”

  “Did you twist it too?”

  I didn’t think I did, but it was starting to throb. He didn’t wait for me to answer. Instead, he swooped his hands under my legs, and I was up and in his arms. He did this with ease, and there was something sexy about this. Before I knew it, the door to his truck was flung open and I was deposited in the passenger seat.

  “Where are we going?” I asked as Rys drove in the opposite direction from Grams' house.

  “The lake’s your spot. I have mine, and I think it’s about time I brought you there.” I smiled at him. I liked the idea of him bringing me to his spot. He drove for twenty minutes, some of which was through the hills and then he turned several more times. I was tired and a bit emotionally drained, but I had a lingering high, knowing I needed to say some things to Rys, and glad that he was giving me the opportunity. He was accepting me with open arms even after the distance I’d been creating.

  Dusty clouds followed the truck as we turned down a dirt road. The rocks and dirt crunched under the tires, and after another minute or two, we stopped. We were in a low lying valley with hills on each side of us. It was so green that even in the dead of night, you couldn’t miss how it looked like soft emerald blankets. He parked the truck and got out. The hatch on the bed of the truck squeaked as he pulled it down. Then he opened my door and swooped me back up again. A second later, he was setting me down on the bed of the truck. Rys hauled himself up and then opened a large black tool box that stretched from one side of the truck bed to the other. He grabbed a thick wool blanket with an Indian print woven into it and laid it down in the bed, then picked me up and moved me on top of it. He did all this quietly. It was so methodical, I laughed.

  “Are we good now?” I giggled.

  Rys sat next to me. “Lay back,” he demanded. I did and watched as he laid next to me. The night sky was like nothing I’d ever seen before. Thousands of stars danced across the sky. The air smelled of damp earth and it was a freshness that was unique. The walls to the truck bed kept the cool breeze wafting over us. Frogs croaked and crickets chirped filling the air melodically. Rys’ jean clad legs rustled against each other, and then his pinky reached out and hooked mine. His skin callused but in a way that showed strength. My hand felt small, but protected.

  “I never noticed all of the different colors stars can be,” I admitted after several long minutes of silence.

  “It’s amazing, isn't it? I used to come here in high school. Then, after I got out and things were the way they were with Crystal, I’d find myself here more often than not. Pretty sure she thought I was going to the bar, but I just needed to clear my head. I never brought her here. I never shared this place with anyone.”

  “She came into the bar again tonight, running her mouth. I was about to call the cops on her and Iggy threatened to kick her butt.”

  “Shit,” he hissed, “You should’ve called me.”

  “What’s the deal with her? She eluded to you hitting her before and to you being arrested. I didn’t feed into her crap, but if you wanted to talk about it…”

  “There had been rumors about her running around behind my back. I didn't want to believe it. She was my wife and I wanted to believe in her. Well, I’d been gone for a week helping my cousin finish a job. I was supposed to stay through the weekend, but we got done early, so I rushed home to Crystal. When I got home, she was screwing Alex. I tore them apart, literally ripped her off of him. Alex and I got into it. She tried to get in the middle of us and got knocked into the wall. It wasn't until hours passed that a cruiser came by and picked me up. She said I’d hit her. I’d never hit her. They arrested me and a few hours later, let me go. No charges were filed. She wanted it to play out different.”

  “She’s a piece of work.”

  “Yes, she most definitely is. If she keeps coming in, you let me know, we’ll get a restraining order filed, yeah?”

  “Keenan?”

  “Yeah?”

  “You think she’s sick like my Momma? She doesn't quite seem right?”

  “No, honey, I just think she's a vindictive drunk.”

  “Keenan?”

  “Yeah, honey?”

  “I’m sorry for pushing you away this week,” I pushed up on an elbow so I could look at him while I spoke, “I guess that’s been my M.O.; things get hard and I run, or they get real and I push. If I’m honest with myself, it’s because I never want to let people get too close. I’ve been so afraid of losing people and from being hurt by people that it’s been something I’ve always done, even if I wasn’t realizing it. So, I settled for guys that weren’t it for me. They were usually fine until they weren’t.”

  I paused and watched Rys’ face. His eyes were kind and he was all ears. He knew I needed to give this to him, and him being the patient man he was, he let me do it the way I needed too. He gave me a squeeze of his hand and waited for me to continue.

  “The guys I dated, I didn't demand they treat me the way I deserved to be treated because I never really knew what I deserved. So with you, when it’s good like it is, and I gotta tell you I think it’s good, I’m scared out of my mind.”

  “Grams’ knew I did this. She kept telling me in one way or another, and I guess she knew me well enough to know that I’d start pushing you away. So the box was something she never shared with me before. Inside the box was a bunch of letters from my Momma to her. It showed me a side to my Momma that I never really understood. I mean, I knew she was sick, but I never understood how twisted her head was, an
d that she was aware of it. In her letters, one thing was incredibly clear, that woman loved me and she didn’t want her illness to affect me, but that’s exactly what I’ve been letting it do my entire life.

  “Grams having you show me those letters made me feel like she was saying, ‘wake up and stop’. She could tell this thing between us is something special and she didn’t want to see me throw it away because of my past, and I’m so sorry for not letting you in.

  “Will you forgive me?”

  “Honey,” he paused, sat up, and then pulled me onto his lap. “I was never gonna let you push me away. I just gave you a little space today. You think I didn't know the moment you started throwing sass at me on the lake that you were something special. You think I didn't know the first time I tried your apple pie, or when I watched you make Earl happier then I’d seen him in ages that you were going to be a different kind of woman; the kind of woman that any man would be a fool to let push him away? Do you think that once I shared the best kiss of my life with you that I wouldn't do whatever it took, including backing off, if that meant that I might get a real shot at something good with you?

  “You gotta know, Maple, what I see in you is a strong woman; a woman that likes to make people happy; a woman that’s a good friend and an even better lover. Look, I know I’m not perfect, I have my flaws. I know I get hot-headed sometimes when it comes to men treating women badly and because of that, I’ve put up with way too much from my ex. I’ve made plenty of mistakes in my life, but Maple you’re not one of them. I want to be worthy and deserving of you. Because Maple, honey, you’re the prize. You’re the kind of woman that I couldn’t have dreamed up a better match for me. You couldn’t have pushed me ‘cause the pull to you is stronger than any push you could’ve given.”

  I blinked at him, then blinked again to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. Everything he said was so beautiful. “Keenan, I am so lucky to have you in my life. Thank you for not giving up on me.”

  “Never. I was never giving up on us.” He grabbed my chin between his fingers and made sure he held my eyes, “Never, Maple.”

  Once he was certain that those words had really sunk in, he very slowly pressed his lips against mine. I missed the feel of his lips. They were soft, then wet as his tongue slid against mine. His hand moved from my lips to the back of my head, cradling me in place. I gripped his sides and held onto him enjoying his muscled body as our kiss deepened. There was a chill in the air, but it didn’t matter. Coming to terms with myself, and knowing how I felt about Keenan made this so much more than it had been before. It was like releasing the hold the past had on me was finally letting me take him in, in a new way. I felt free.

  I pulled at his shirt and he helped me take it off. The moonlight cascaded enough light that I could see those beautifully masculine ridges of his chest and his abdomen. I wanted it all.

  “I want you to make love to me, Keenan.”

  He slowed our kiss and leaned me back, holding me up with an arm behind my back. “I’m going to make love to you. I’m going to kiss every inch of you. I’m going to touch your soft flesh. I’m going to tangle my hands in your hair. I’m going to feel my body next to yours, but mostly Maple, I’m just going to love you.”

  The air around me lost its chill and I suddenly felt very warm. I had said these words to men before, but I never truly felt the depth of them until right then. Keenan Rys, who had been so patient with me, who’d never wanted to take from me, who’d been my rock, and my friend, loved me. I knew unequivocally, without a doubt, to the depths of my soul that I loved him back.

  “Keenan,” my voice cracked with emotion, and he pulled away from his kisses to my neck, “I love you too.”

  “You love me?”

  “So, very much.”

  “Thank Christ!” he said, and lowered his mouth to mine. He proceeded to do as he promised. Under the dark country sky, with the moon and the stars shining down on us; Keenan Rys showed me exactly how much he loved me.

  “Are you nervous?” Rys asked as I finished sticking the last bobby pin in my hair, securing it exactly how I wanted it.

  “A little,” I admitted.

  “Everything will be fine. There’s nothing to be nervous about,” Rys assured me. We were going to see Grams' attorney today. I knew that there wasn’t anything to be worried about, but Grams had a way of throwing surprises at me, when I least expected them.

  The drive to the attorney’s office was quick. Twenty minutes later, we were waiting in a small conference room at a large mahogany table. Mr. Schlocks was running a few minutes late.

  “Calm, honey.” Rys placed his hand on my knee to settle my nerves, and it worked. I took a few calming breaths and noticed the faint smell of vanilla in the air and it made me wonder if Grams chose this place because of that.

  Howard Schlocks walked in followed by a younger version of himself. He looked exactly like you would picture a Howard to look like. He was bald on the top of his head with thinning white hair on the sides of his head. He wore a plaid suit that was probably purchased around the time I was born. Still, the man carried himself like a man who knew what he was doing.

  “Ms. Wilshire, I presume? This is my son David Schlocks. He’ll be assisting me.” I reached out my hand to shake his. “And you are?” he asked Rys.

  “Keenan Rys Montgomery Sir, and I’m Maple’s man.”

  “Montgomery, huh? Any relation to Earl Montgomery?”

  “Yes Sir, that’s my uncle.”

  “He’s a good man.”

  “Yes, he is.”

  The men took a seat across from us and Mr. Schlocks set a large manila folder down in front of him.

  “Let’s get down to this, shall we? It’s all pretty straightforward.” He opened the folder and slid a thick document towards Rys and me.

  “Mrs. Wilshire was pretty clear about everything. You are to inherit the family home located at 1214 Fifth Street. You must maintain occupancy for a period of time no less than twelve months. If you are found to have vacated the property, it will be sold with the proceeds going to benefit the mental health unit at Mercy West Hospital. There is also a parcel of land that has been left to you with no stipulations. The condo will be sold and you are to receive all proceeds from the sale of the condo. If you go to page three there is a list of liquid assets, as well as a list of stocks and bonds.” He waited for me to flip to the third page and my eyes bulged when I saw the final figure. The balance was around four-hundred and fifty thousand dollars. “Now, we will be responsible for listing the condo and paying out the remainder of Mrs. Wilshire’s debts, so the final figure will change. Any vehicles will be transferred to you. Mrs. Wilshire makes no stipulations on whether or not you should sell her convertible, however, she wanted me to add that it would be desirable for you to drive her convertible with the top down and leave the Studebaker for Sunday strolls. She was adamant that I say this last part to you. Lastly, the contents of both properties have also been left to you to do with as you please. Do you have any questions?”

  I looked to Rys, shocked at the amount of money that Grams had left me. I had no idea that Grams had money like that. My eyes asked Rys if he had any questions, and he gave me a slight shake of his head. “No, I think it seems pretty clear,” I answered.

  “Great, then David will go over some paperwork that we will need to have you sign in order to transfer funds to you. If you have any questions, or if anything comes up, please contact me.” Mr. Schlocks shook our hands, and left the room. Ten minutes after that Rys and I were in his truck headed back to Grams', well I guess I meant, my house.

  “How are you feeling?” he asked me.

  I rolled the window down and took a deep breath. “I’m shocked. I'm also not shocked about the clause she added about selling the house. I don’t think I could ever sell the house.”

  “Thank God, ‘cause I love that house. I mean, we could pick something out together, but that house is the shit.”

  I gave him
a look for his language and then asked, “What do you think is up with the land?”

  “You mean, she never told you about it? I just figured that you knew what it was.”

  “Nope, no clue.”

  “Did she mention it to you while you two had your talk?”

  “No, honey. No idea.”

  He pulled up to the house and I waited for him to round the truck to open my door then I hopped down grabbing his arm for support. I walked to the front door, unlocked it, and walked inside. I thought perhaps Rys could tell I needed a minute because he waited outside. I ran my hand over the mantel admiring the shiny wood. “You and your plans, Grams. I’d take you any day over this stuff, though.” I opened the French doors to the garden and walked outside. I took it in. I couldn’t believe she left me so much, but more than that, I had this sense that she was all around me.

  I felt strong hands on my shoulders. I had been sitting in a lounge chair in the backyard for a while. “Max called me, wanted to know if we wanted to get drinks at Iggy’s.”

  I felt like I was at Iggy’s a lot, but I was never there as a customer. I had the next two nights off, “Yeah, we can do that.”

  With Rys and my feelings out there in the open, and after the meeting with the attorneys, I felt a lightness I hadn’t felt in a while. I still had the sadness in the pit of my stomach, but for the first time since I found out Grams was sick, I found myself smiling a little more.

  Even though we were only going to Iggy’s, I decided to go all out. I wore a fitted cornflower blue lace dress and my favorite pair of cowgirl boots that I had found in my old room. My hair was down and I spent extra time making my dark hair, that’s normally unruly, flow in perfect curls down my back. I did a smoky eye and a light lip gloss coated my lips.

  “Damn honey, you look…,” Rys rubbed his chin from the doorway as if he was trying to drum up the perfect adjective.

  “What?” I blushed because the look in his eyes was saying all he needed to say.