The Fourth Time Charm: A Friends to Lovers Romance

by Maya Hughes

  Taking the stairs two at a time, I stood outside her bedroom door and knocked. She’d go to see her dad. One hundred percent her next course of action would be ripping her dad a new asshole, but that wouldn’t be the best thing for either of us.

  After the double hit of her discovering my lies and finding out her feelings about the bone marrow transplant, I needed to make sure we were okay.

  Hostile silence reverberated from the other side of the wood separating us. “Can we talk?”

  Nothing.

  “It’s not like I don’t know you’re in there.” I barged in.

  “Get out.” She jerked her hair into a sloppy ponytail.

  “We need to talk.”

  “Now you want to talk? I’ve asked you why you weren’t playing much this season and you lied to my face multiple times.”

  The blame settled squarely on my shoulders. “What was I supposed to say?”

  “How about ‘Marisa, your dad is a colossal dick and he’s benching me because we’re friends and I’ve been going to Monday dinners, even after I promised I’d stop if it affected my spot on the team.’”

  “And then you’d never give him a chance.”

  “What’s your obsession with me giving him an ounce of my time? You offered to come to dinner, so I didn’t have to go alone, so I’d actually show up and didn’t have to talk. I don’t want to know him. And now you’ve made it to the point where there are only two more games left in the regular season. Have you lost your mind?”

  “If you didn’t go to dinner, he wouldn’t sign off on your tuition and maybe you’d have to transfer again or not finish school.” It had been a floundering Hail Mary pass to keep her in school, to make sure I didn’t have to suffer through another year like I had freshman year. I’d just wanted three more years to spend together before we were officially adults.

  “This is your life. Stop treating me like I’m holding this thing I did over your head forever.”

  “I was trying to protect you.”

  “I don’t need your protection, and I never asked for it.”

  “Like you didn’t need it with Chris.”

  It was a low blow. But it needed to be said. Sometimes she did need help and protection and I wanted to be the one she turned to.

  She staggered back. “That was an asshole move.” The words shot out of her mouth like a confetti cannon of contempt.

  “This is real life. Not what’s happening out on the field.” I raked my hands through my head. “Let me try to figure this out.”

  She threw her hands into the air. “You’ve been doing an excellent job so far. Two games. There are two games left before playoffs. You’re lucky you guys have had a great season and hopefully there will be a few more chances.”

  “I can—”

  “And if you can’t, like you haven’t been able to do for the past two seasons? What then? What about your dad’s medical bills? Your parents’ house? Quinn’s college? All these big plans. You’re willing to put them on the line to give some asshole who might as well have been a sperm donor a chance?”

  She charged toward the door, but I got in her way.

  “We’re not finished.”

  “We sure as hell are.” She shoved against my chest and barged out of the room. Her steps thundered down the stairs.

  I dropped to the edge of her bed, staring at the empty doorway. The words echoed in my head. Did she mean it?

  21

  Marisa

  I blazed down the street to his house with sweat clinging to my skin under my coat. Heat traveled up through the zippered top of my coat and heated my chin while the air chapped my cheeks.

  A house away from his, a kid sped toward me on a bike bundled up with knee and elbow pads and a helmet on.

  “Levi, come back.” An older girl, equally padded up, called after him.

  He turned and rode toward her.

  Behind the girl, running alongside an identical-looking little boy with a towel wrapped around his waist to steady him, was Ron.

  His words of encouragement sliced through the air. “You’ve got it, Landon. You’re doing it.”

  The coals of the fire burned even hotter. Incendiary rage detonated in my head like emotional napalm.

  My skin tingled like I’d stumbled onto a pack of lions ready to tear me limb from limb. Only these weren’t physical threats, but mental ones gouging deep into old wounds I pretended were healed. I wanted to flee, but I couldn’t.

  Landon’s feet were moving a mile a minute and it wasn’t until they were ten feet from me that Ron looked up. He stopped, catching Landon around the waist with the towel. The bike toppled over, but the little boy stayed anchored around the waist. He didn’t let him fall.

  He started. His forehead creased in concern, and it made me hate him even more. “Marisa, what are you doing here? What’s wrong?” He steadied Landon on his feet and walked toward me.

  “You’re what’s wrong.” The words barely escaped through my gritted teeth.

  He looked from Landon to me and crouched down, facing the boy toward him. “Head over to play with your brother and sister, Landon. I need to talk to Marisa.” So doting, gentle, and kind.

  My blood simmered in my veins. Not that he was being nice to some kid I’d never met before, but that he could be that to some kid who wasn’t even his own.

  The little boy looked from me to Ron and nodded.

  “Do you want to come inside?” He reached for me. Comforting, gentle bullshit.

  I jerked my arm away and stepped back.

  Weariness radiated off him, but once again—too fucking bad. “What did I do now?”

  “There’s a laundry list. Let’s start with you not playing LJ because of me.” The burn was back, building brighter in the back of my nose. “What the hell do you think you’re doing? His future is on the line. His career and providing for his family are on the line.”

  He lifted the Fulton U cap like he needed to air out the top of his head. “I wondered how long it would take him to cave.”

  “Was this a test? Some screwed up mental game?” The kids behind him all turned to watch us. Maybe it was best they saw exactly what kind of guy he was and who he’d been pretending to be.

  His gaze cut away and back to mine with arms folded over his Fulton U Coaching Staff polo. “Life is all about choices. The things we value and the things we don’t.”

  The front door to the house swung open. “Lunch is ready.” Nora stood in the doorway, smiling and waving for the kids to come in. She froze when she spotted me, a worried look crossing over her face.

  A perfect little family. He got to play house while trying to destroy the closest thing I’d ever had to a home.

  I clenched my fists at my sides and glared, trying and failing to keep my breathing under control. Trying not to let myself spiral into the splotchy-vision breakdown barreling down hard onto me.

  “He came with me to those dinners because he’s my friend. I needed support and he was there for me. Whenever I’ve needed support he’s been there for me and you used that friendship against him.” My voice cracked. I hated how tears burned in the corners of my eyes. I hated how much I wanted to feel nothing whenever I looked at him. And I hated how he’d used me against LJ.

  “All I was trying—”

  “You were trying to take away the only person who’s ever truly loved me because you’re jealous. I thought I hated you before, but you’ve sunk to a whole new level.”

  His jaw clenched and the vein in the side of his neck bulged. “This wasn’t about jealousy. It was about making sure you two didn’t repeat the same mistakes your mom and I did. Football cannot be more important than the people you care about.”

  “It was for you!” I took a step toward him and shoved a finger in his face. “You left. You left me with her and you never came back. Hell, football is still the most important thing in your life.” The tears burned my cheeks in the winter wind. “The deal was weekly dinners with you, except on gam
e nights or when you’re scouting or when you’re at a combine or whenever else it fucking suits you. Or it’s time to hang out with Nora and her kids. It seems you’ve got plenty of time for them.”

  “It’s every other weekend. When Nora has the kids.” His lips pinched and his head dipped.

  I hoped the weight of shame buried him.

  “Yes, football is also important. I have a job and a lot of people who depend on me.”

  “So does he.” I screamed so loudly it echoed on the empty street. My throat throbbed, raw and blazing. “Why the hell do you think he’s been working so hard? And you’re worried about him being selfish?”

  “He needs to know—”

  “No! He doesn’t need to know anything. He needs to get a fair shot at the draft. You will play him in every game for the rest of the season, so his draft prospects aren’t damaged any more than they have been already.”

  Tight, clipped words escaped his mouth. “You’re not going to tell me who I can and can’t play, Marisa.”

  “If you ever want to see me after today, you will put the best inside linebacker on the team in the last two games before the playoffs. And we both know that’s LJ. It’s what he’s worked for and what he deserves.”

  “And if I don’t?”

  “I’m done.” I threw up my hands, ready to follow through on what I’d said. It wasn’t a threat, it was the truth. “I’m done with you. I’m done with you and your pretending you care about me. I’m done with you forever. You can play house with your new girlfriend and her kids and forget you ever knew me. Forget I ever existed because you’re a selfish bastard who doesn’t care about anyone other than himself, and Nora and those kids will be better off the second they know that.”

  The front door to his house was still partially open. “Did you hear that, Nora? Run the other fucking way.” I raked my blistering gaze over him, not able to believe I’d let LJ think for even a second I could ever think of him as my dad.

  “What about your last semester? I still haven’t signed the forms yet.” How long had he been sitting on his ace in the hole?

  My laugh dripped disdain and disbelief. “I’ll pay for it. I’ll use the money I saved for my fellowship. I don’t care; I’m done doing things on your terms. If you ever want the chance at having any kind of relationship with your own daughter—your actual daughter, you’ll do what’s right.” I spun to leave.

  “Does he know you’re here right now, putting your future on the line for his?”

  “No.” Whirling around, I marched back up to him. Angry sadness chewed through my chest at the thought that he couldn’t believe I’d sacrifice what I had for someone I cared about. “And he’d stop me if he knew. He didn’t want to tell me why he wasn’t playing because for some insane reason,” I smacked my hands against my forehead, “he didn’t want me to hate you. He wanted me to make up my own mind without his interference. He was trying to give you a chance and you threw it away with some macho ‘now I decide I’m your father’ bullshit.”

  “I am your father.”

  “Since when? Since you left when I was eight? I didn’t see you. I didn’t hear from you. I didn’t get a single present, letter, note, signal flashed in the sky—nothing. You left me with her. You left me to fend for myself and I will never let you hurt someone I love.”

  I wiped my nose with the sleeve of my coat.

  “He’s my friend. My best friend. The best friend anyone could ever have.”

  From the look on his face it wasn’t the least bit convincing. Fine, if he couldn’t do it for me, then maybe he’d do it for the one thing I knew he loved.

  “You know it’s what the team needs, and what you know is right. Maybe once you can act like a decent person.”

  I choked back a sob and wiped away the tears chaffing my cheeks. “You can choose to be a real father to me just this once.” I held one finger up in the air, but not the one I wanted. “And do the right thing. Or you can start that new family over with Nora and pretend I never existed, because I’ll only ever think of you as dead.”

  Spinning, I fled, running until I reached the end of the block. Around the corner and out of eyesight, I collapsed against the tall wooden fence and dissolved into a flood of tears.

  Every step closer to me closed the door to the future LJ had been dreaming of his whole life. He’d talked all the time about how great it would feel to buy his parents a new house, to pay for Quinn’s college, to know that the next time his dad, mom or Quinn needed anything, that he could take care of it without a second thought.

  And he’d almost lost it all because he was too stubborn for his own good.

  With The Brothel in view, my steps slowed. With each one, it felt like a lead weight had been added to my ankles, like my energy had been siphoned off with a garden hose and a gas can.

  Sitting at the top of the stairs leading to the porch was LJ.

  I held onto the railing to steady myself. My face felt like a splotchy, wind-burned mess.

  “You went and talked to him.” The corners of his mouth pinched.

  “I did.” Rushing past him, I opened the front door. Inside, I figured I’d hear grilling, drinking and laughing going on, but it seemed the party was over. Another thing ruined because of me.

  His steps followed behind me. “I told you not to do it.”

  “And I told you not to be an idiot.”

  “What did you say to him?” He dashed past me and stood on the stairs, blocking my path.

  I gripped the banister and ground my teeth. Helping him was out of the question, but he could sacrifice everything for me? “I told him the truth, and I told him if he ever wanted to speak to me again, he’d do what he knew was right.”

  “Risa.” A long suffering sigh of disappointment and misery descended around him like a cloud. “He’s your dad.” He sat again, planting himself in my way.

  “When will you understand that this isn’t a missed football game or forgetting to pick me up from school? This is never being there for me. My parents have never been there for me. My mom isn’t capable of taking care of herself, let alone me, and Ron cut out when I was just old enough to miss him. My parents aren’t your parents, and not every parent deserves a second chance—or even a first chance. Sometimes drawing that line is the best thing you can do to protect yourself.” Just when I’d thought there were no more tears to cry, they were back.

  But this time I wasn’t sitting on the frozen sidewalk. I collapsed on the step in front of him.

  LJ’s arms enveloped me and held me tight against his chest.

  I clung to him like I’d stop breathing if I let go.

  He buried his face in my hair and ran his fingers along the back of my head until the sobs turned to hiccups of embarrassment. “You know you’re the strongest person I know.”

  “I’m not. I’m really not. If I were, I wouldn’t have come running to Fulton U to get Ron to pay for college.” I looked up at him. “And because I hated being away from you in New York.”

  “It only took you three years to finally admit you find me absolutely irresistible.” A gentle smile played on his lips.

  A watery laugh spilled from mine. “Yet somehow you still manage to be the worst.”

  He brought me into his room and kicked off his shoes.

  I toed mine off and followed him to his bed.

  With strong steady fingers, he unbuttoned my coat.

  I stilled his fingers and stared into his eyes. “You shouldn’t have lied to me. You shouldn’t have kept this from me.”

  His nod was grim. He peeled my coat off my shoulders. “I know. I didn’t want you to hate him and I didn’t want you to not be able to pay tuition. I didn’t want you to have to leave again.” Staring into his eyes, the tears returned for a totally different reason. With one look, he made me feel a kind of wanted I’d never felt before and didn’t know if I’d feel it again. It was scary to see the depths of his care and know it might not last forever.

  We climbed i
nto bed together, our arms and legs tangled and our heads on the same pillow.

  He ran his fingers through my hair, pulling at the strands stuck to my face by tears.

  “I love you, Marisa.”

  This wasn’t the first time he’d said it, but this time it felt different. It felt heart-stoppingly, soul-scorchingly different.

  22

  LJ

  Keyton leaned, bracing his arm on the locker beside mine. “Listen, man. I’m sorry. I know you said not to say anything, but sometimes you’re just too damn stubborn for your own good.”

  The tightness in my muscles had nothing to do with powerhouse practice or skipping stretching. I dropped my pads onto my shoulder in the locker room and dragged my jersey over my head.

  “Nothing to do about it now.” The stadium rumbled above us. Stands filled with frozen fans.

  “How’s Marisa?”

  “I’m more pissed at you for getting her angry than Coach.” My cheek twitched.

  Marisa and I had spent the last couple days in our own world, disappearing into quiet spots on campus. I knew I should’ve gotten my own place senior year.

  He held out his hand. “Are we good?”

  Tilting my head, I met his eyes. How many times had I done something like that for Marisa’s own good? Sometimes we had to push the people we cared about. It’s what friends did. I grabbed his hand and jerked him closer, patting my fist against his back. “We’re good.”

  With a nod and half-smile, he let out a breath. “Thanks. I was worried you’d boot me out of the house or something.”

  “No way. If I did, Berk might try to move Alexis into the spare room.”

  “She’s up to something, isn’t she?”

  “When isn’t she? But Berk will have to figure that out on his own.”

  Coach Saunders pushed into the locker room and all the chatter quieted down.

  I snapped straight, staring at him and trying to keep the daggers sheathed. Marisa had told me all about the cozy family scene she’d stumbled into when she confronted him. To think I’d thought he deserved another chance.