Mustard on Top

by Wanda Degolier

  Agatha pursed her lips to keep from laughing. One of her hands fluttered to her chest, feigning shock. “Do you think the drugs made him say such things?”

  “I would assume he suffers from paranoia.” Moe’s brown, puppy-dog eyes seemed guilt free.

  “I suppose that’s possible.” Agatha dropped her gaze to her lap, hoping to appear distraught. “I don’t know what to do, with his father gone and all.”

  ****

  Ben slid a shingle in place, positioned a nail, and hammered it flat in two strokes. His blackened thumb warned of the perils of moving too fast, yet he rushed his motions. With less than a week left, he worried he wouldn’t finish the projects he’d started.

  His stomach ached when he thought of leaving. Helen and Theo had woven their way through the cracks of his damaged soul. He wanted to stay longer, but none of the other attorneys in his firm had agreed take over his caseload for an additional week. Given the way the court system worked, delaying his cases wasn’t an option.

  Ben pushed the thought from his mind and focused on the task at hand. He didn’t want to leave Helen with an unfinished roof and an unfinished kitchen.

  The sound of squealing children caught his attention. From his vantage point, Ben saw into the backyards of Helen’s neighbors. In one an older man, wearing a Seahawks baseball cap backwards, worked to light a fire in his barbecue. A couple of adults sat on chairs talking while three kids chased each other in a game of tag.

  In Ben’s world, comprised of high-rises, courtrooms, and expensive restaurants, he rarely encountered children. Sure, coworkers had them, and on the occasional weekend, he’d encounter one or two kids at the office, but for the most part their care was relegated to nannies or the occasional stay-at-home spouse.

  The focus of Ben’s life had become making the rich richer. Ben forced his gaze away, snatched several shingles, and scooted across the roof, scratching his arm in the process. He placed the tile, positioned the nail, and swung the hammer driving the nail in one swing.

  “What can I do to help?”

  Ben jumped at hearing Helen’s voice. She was poised on the peak of the roof wearing work gloves and a gray sweatshirt. Her dark, shiny hair was swept into a messy ponytail. Ben’s heart lurched. Although kind and generous, Helen wore her independence like a badge. “What are you doing?” Ben asked.

  “I’m helping.”

  “You should be relaxing, you’re not obligated to help.”

  “I didn’t ask if I was obligated. I live here.” She scuttled up next to him.

  “Did you take your shots today?” he asked.

  “Don’t change the subject. Show me what to do.”

  “I’m serious. You could die if you fell off the roof.”

  “Oh brother.” Helen’s mouth quirked on one side. “You’ve been taking lessons from Theo.”

  “Well, did you?”

  “Yes I did,” she answered testily then pointed. “The roof.”

  The urge to kiss her nearly overwhelmed Ben. “You’ve got a million things on your plate. I’ve got this under control. Take a break.”

  “If you don’t tell me what to do, I’ll make it up as I go.”

  Well acquainted with the negotiation process and stubborn people, Ben decided not to argue. “Brat.” He gave her the basics.

  When he finished, Helen asked, “That’s all there is to it?”

  “I’m afraid so.”

  Helen frowned. “I should have reroofed years ago.” Her gaze skimmed the roof. “It looks professional. You do good work.”

  A childish pride welled inside Ben. “Thank you.”

  “Can I take some of these?” Helen gestured toward the pile of shingles.

  “Sure.”

  As Ben watched Helen collect the shingles and move into place, he wondered what she thought about him, and whether she viewed his arrival as good or bad for Theo. He’d ask her another time.

  When the light faded to the color of murky water, Ben packed his tools into his belt and stood on the roof’s peak. To the south lay the Nalley Boardwalk and Salmon Bay. The yellow-white sun cast orange-and-pink rays across cloudless skies and over water dotted with green islands. Off to the east was Mount Rainier. Ben had forgotten his Nalley was breathtaking.

  He called out, “Helen, you need to see this view.”

  “In a second.”

  A few minutes later, Helen scooted next to him. “I’m not balancing on the peak like you,” she announced.

  Ben smiled down at her, glad to be able to share the moment. “Look at the sunset, it’s breathtaking.”

  “Yep. I have the pleasure of seeing it nearly every day at work.”

  Ben cocked an eyebrow, of course she did.

  Helen drew her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. Ben sat beside her. “You cold?”

  “A little.”

  Ben inched closer and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “I’m just keeping you warm.” She fit like she belonged there.

  Helen slid him a sideways glance then pointed. “That’s Edgar Island.”

  “You have a great view from up here. If you popped the top and installed a balcony, you’d double maybe even triple the value of your home.”

  “Yeah, but we don’t need that much space, although I’ve always sort of planned to build a catwalk.”

  “I’ve missed living here.” Ben surprised himself with the statement. “Helen?”

  “Yeah?”

  “I’m sorry for the past, for the selfish bastard I used to be.”

  Helen’s shoulders went rigid. “I’m over it.” Her voice sounded cold.

  “You been so good about my returning,” he said, unsure why he was bringing up the topic. Did he want her to say she understood? That she forgave him?

  “I’ll push you off the roof if that makes you feel better.” Her offer sounded a little too genuine.

  “Seriously, weren’t you angry with me all those years?”

  Helen sighed, continuing to stare at the sunset. She let several beats pass before responding. “Anger is an ugly emotion I try not to indulge in. I’d rather worry about other things.”

  “Have you been happy?”

  Helen jerked her face his direction then scooted out of his embrace. The fire in her eyes seared Ben’s heart. “Are you asking me if you ruined my life?”

  “I don’t… I don’t know.”

  “If you think the lack of your presence in my life or in Theo’s life has made our lives hell, you’re a pretty pompous ass.”

  “I don’t think that.” Bewildered, Ben stared down at the rooftop.

  “What did you mean?”

  “Why aren’t you married? You’re beautiful and smart, you deserve...” his voice trailed off when he realized anything he said could be taken as an insult.

  Helen scoffed. “For your information, I did marry.”

  “Huh?”

  “Yes. I am a divorcee.” Her tone had an edge.

  “What happened?”

  “What about you? You said you don’t have other children, but what about a wife?”

  “No wife.”

  “Not ever?”

  “No.”

  “Why not?”

  A familiar queasiness returned. “Well…” he began. How could he commit to someone he’d be forced to lie to? He’d ignored Theo’s existence for years, how could he expect anyone to forgive him when he didn’t forgive himself? “Uh.”

  Unexpectedly, Helen laughed. “Why are you so nervous?”

  Ben chuckled, releasing some tension.

  “You sure aren’t comfortable talking about yourself. Why?”

  Ben’s self-loathing returned. He’d wanted to learn about Helen, but the conversation had jack-knifed and he was emotionally stumbling all over himself. He stared out at the blackening sky. “I haven’t been the best person. I’ve won cases for people who were undeserving. I’ve done what’s best for me, and frankly I’m ashamed of myself.”

  His words hun
g in the air.

  “Are you going to change or just whine about it?” Helen asked.

  Ben laughed. “I’m trying.”

  Helen’s posture softened. “Sometimes I think it’s worse to start with everything: looks, athletics, brains, money. You’re not forced to grow a spine.”

  Ben nodded. “You may be right. I’d like to hear about your husband.”

  “Why?”

  “I’d like to get to know my son’s mother and Theo’s history.”

  “There’s not much to tell. I was nineteen when Kenny drifted into town. He took a job at Hot Diggitys back before I owned the place and we had this crazy chemistry. He was charming and funny, an aspiring writer. He’d been all over the world and could weave a good story.” Helen paused, and apparently reliving a fond memory, she smiled faintly.

  Ben felt a pang of jealousy, wondering if any memories of him caused her to smile. “So what happened?”

  “Chemistry only gets you so far. Ended up we had very different values. He wanted me to find a babysitter for Theo, so he and I could travel. He talked about backpacking across Europe and going to Africa.” She seemed lost in thought. “I didn’t want to be away from Theo. Plus, I couldn’t imagine not earning a living. I wanted roots for Theo while Kenny took whatever odd job he could find. He only worked when he necessary.

  “In the end Theo and I made him feel like a ‘caged in.’ Sixteen months into the marriage, he flew the coop, taking my savings with him.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  Helen shrugged. “It happens.”

  “Was Theo upset?”

  “I don’t think Theo ever warmed up to him. The kid’s got better instincts than I do. After Kenny left, I decided I was just flat bad at picking out men and decided not to put me or Theo through that roller-coaster ride again.”

  First me then a drifter. What luck, Ben thought. “Does Theo remember him?”

  “I think so, gosh, we never talk about it. Theo was only four when Kenny left.”

  “The world verse Helen Ableman.”

  Helen tilted her head to the side. “Many peoples’ lives are much harder life than mine ever was.”

  “When was your life the hardest?” Ben asked.

  Helen scrunched her face. “What’s with you tonight? You want more ammunition for your guilt?”

  “I need to understand what you and Theo went through.”

  “Why?”

  Ben shrugged. “To feel more connected maybe. I’ve been alone for so long and now…” His voice faltered. “You have my respect. Your choice to raise Theo was selfless. Your whole life has been selfless, unlike mine.”

  “Some people view single parenthood as selfish. Anyway, I was just your average single mom. Overworked and underpaid.” She flashed him a grin.

  “Did your mom help at all?” Helen’s mom had disowned Helen, had she disowned her grandson too?

  A pained expression crossed Helen’s face. “No.”

  “So what’d you do after Theo was born?”

  “I got an apartment.”

  Guilt, like poison, pulsed through his veins. These were the questions he had on sleepless nights. “What was Theo like?”

  Helen grinned. “Adorable. So cute. He had huge eyes and these eyelashes that could dust the ceiling.” Helen chuckled. “Even in elementary school the girls were dropping like flies.”

  “Was he an easy baby? Did he sleep well?”

  “Oh, no, no, no. He had colic. For hours I’d walk through the apartment bouncing him. The neighbors even complained to the management about the footsteps.”

  “Who watched him when you went to work?”

  Helen straightened her back and her voice became hard. “I got him into a government-run daycare that took a percentage of my paycheck.”

  “What about your best friend, Cindy? Did you two stay friends?”

  “We’re still friends, but our lives went down separate paths. Cindy’s always been sweet, but she’s not a kid person. She still doesn’t have kids although she’s been like an aunt to Theo.”

  Ben thought of the women at work who complained about how hard parenting was. “I’d always assumed you had some help.”

  “We got through, but I’m not going to lie, we had difficult times.”

  “So when did you become the owner of Hot Diggitys?”

  “We playing twenty questions?”

  “Is that all right with you?”

  “As long as you realize I’ll get my turn next.”

  “Deal.”

  “Okay. Let’s see.” Helen gazed into the sky. “I guess it was twelve years ago that Sally and Earl decided to retire.”

  “They sold you Hot Diggitys?”

  “No.” Helen guffawed. “They gave me Hot Diggitys. Once I owned it, I discovered why. The stand was losing money. I think they’d stopped paying themselves.”

  “So what did you do?”

  “Revamped the menu, hence all my experiments with food. Painted, cleaned up. Theo and I ate Ramen noodles and beans and rice for years.”

  “Hot Diggitys seems pretty profitable now.”

  “It took me a while, but I finally got to the point where I actually made a decent living. That’s when I bought this house. We’ve been here eight years.”

  Ben patted the roof with a new appreciation. The home had been hard won and probably meant more to Helen than his cars or condo.

  “It’s getting dark.” Ben scanned the backyards of Helen’s neighbors. Most people had gone inside. Movement in Agatha’s back yard caught Ben’s eye. “I think someone just came out Agatha’s back door.” He pointed to a man.

  Helen squinted. “Hey!” she shouted, startling Ben with her volume. Another man emerged from the back door. “What are you doing there?” Helen demanded.

  The men, ignoring her, hopped the back fence and disappeared into the alley.

  “Should we call the police?” Ben asked.

  “Probably not, her son’s living with her now. Maybe it was him and a friend.”

  “Ah.”

  Helen stared at Agatha’s back yard. “On second thought, let’s go check the house.”

  ****

  In her haste to get down, Helen missed a rung on the ladder. She caught herself before falling, but scraped her leg on the ladder’s edge. Pain radiated across her shin as she jogged to Agatha’s.

  “Agatha!” Helen knocked on the front door. Light from a burning lamp shown through a gap in the living-room-window curtains. Peeking inside, Helen saw one of Agatha’s chairs was overturned. Helen pounded on the window. “Agatha! Jeremy!” She tried the door, found it locked, and whirled around, smacking into Ben’s chest. “Ouch! Sorry!” Was the man made of steel?

  “We should call the police,” she said.

  “Let’s try to get in first. If she’s hurt, getting to her quickly might make a difference. We can call the police from inside if we need to,” Ben suggested.

  Ben’s logic made sense, and Helen headed toward the back door. “Geez, it’s too dark to see anything. Oh, I almost forgot I have a key for Agatha’s house.” Helen veered toward her house.

  Halfway there, Ben yelled, “I’m in! The back door was unlocked.”

  Helen did an about face and ran back. Unlike her home, the rear entrance opened to the dining room rather than the kitchen.

  Light poured out the open back door, and Helen stepped inside to find Ben standing still and gaping. She followed his gaze. In the middle of the kitchen floor, was a man tied to a chair, his body hunched over. “Holy crap.” Helen exclaimed.

  “Check for a pulse, I’ll try to find Agatha,” Ben said. Helen moved into the kitchen.

  The man on the chair squirmed then coughed. Caked blood on his mouth and chin cracked. One eye was swollen shut, and his bony, tattooed arms jutted from the sleeves of a plaid, button-down shirt.

  “Jeremy? Ben he’s moving.” Helen called over her shoulder. Ben’s footfalls pounded the ceiling above her. Jeremy mumbled, and Helen moved
closer. “What did you say?

  “She’s not here.” He grimaced.

  “Who? Agatha?”

  “Bingo.” He coughed, splattering blood across the floor.

  Ben burst into the kitchen. “I didn’t find her.”

  “He’s says Agatha’s not here,” Helen said. “Where is she, Jeremy?”

  “On a date.” Even beaten and bloodied, Jeremy managed to sound disdainful. His head lolled to the side, and he opened his good eye. “Untie me.”

  “A date?” Helen recalled Agatha’s cheery disposition. “With who?” Jeremy inhaled then flinched. Helen waited for him to regain his composure then repeated, “Who’d she go on a date with?”

  “You wouldn’t know him.”

  “You two know each other?” Ben asked.

  “Ben. This is Jeremy, Agatha’s son. Jeremy. Ben,” Helen said.

  “I’d shake your hand, but I’m tied up at the moment.” Jeremy eyed Ben with his good eye.

  “We need to call the police,” Ben said. “He needs medical attention too.”

  “No cops. No doctors.” Jeremy’s voice rose in volume.

  Ben scoffed. “We need both.”

  “I won’t tell the cops a damn thing anyway, and you can’t force medical care on someone. No pigs and no docs.”

  Helen leaned against the counter and stared at Jeremy. She wanted to handle the situation in the best way for Agatha. The more she thought, the angrier at Jeremy she became.

  “Where’s a phone?” Ben scanned the home’s interior.

  “Wait Ben. Let’s think this through,” Helen said.

  “Can one of you untie me? This isn’t very comfortable and I need to pee.”

  “How could you let those men into your mother’s home?” Helen blurted.

  “I think we should call the police.” Ben knelt next to Jeremy and began pulling on his ropes.

  “NO COPS.”

  “Why? Is there a warrant out for your arrest?” Helen asked.

  “I think he’s got a broken nose,” Ben said.

  “Why no cops Jeremy?” Helen repeated. The more she contemplated the idea, the better she liked the idea of calling them. The police would probably have a reason to haul Jeremy away even if he was the victim. If Jeremy spent a few days in jail, he’d be forced to sober up.