Lumberjack Werebear (Saw Bears Book 1)

by T. S. Joyce

  Her hands were warm where his lips had touched her skin. His jacket smelled like him, woods and man and some sort of crisp, clean-smelling body wash, and something more in the undercurrents. She pulled another breath and frowned in concentration. Animal? The mixture of his scents was so alluring she inhaled three more times before she settled the jacket onto her lap and pulled her art supplies from her satchel.

  The next few hours she spent in observation. Time flew as she tried to figure out everyone’s job. Tagan seemed to be the boss up here, but he worked down with the crew. He held a walkie-talkie, and from where she sat, seemed to speak to Kellen, who ran the main machine that dragged logs, and Connor on the processor. In between hauls, he, Denison, Brighton, and Bruiser hooked giant cables around felled logs, then ran to the edges of the clearing to get out of the way of the machinery that dragged them up the hill. She couldn’t even imagine how awful it would be for one of her friends to get caught under those lumber-heavy cables. It rocked with power and dragged the logs so fast it could crush the crew with one little misstep.

  To eradicate those awful thoughts, she pressed charcoal sticks to sketch paper and shadowed and smudged with her fingers to sculpt the pictures she wanted. She’d meant to draw the new scenery since it was absolutely beautiful up here if she ignored the strip of felled, dead logs down the mountainside. But instead of drawing pines or birds or the river that snaked through the valley below, she drew Tagan. And not just Tagan, but the machinery and the other men as well. She tried to capture the seriousness in Kellen’s eyes when he turned in the seat of the machine he worked, and the focus on Tagan’s face when he was making sure his crew was out of the way and safe. She drew Denison’s grin after he told a joke and Brighton as he stood on the landing with his back to her with the wide world beyond.

  “Those are pretty good,” Connor said from behind.

  Brooke gasped and jumped so hard, her charcoal skittered across Haydan’s eyebrow. “You scared me,” she said, closing the sketch book. It felt weird to share her unfinished drawings with him.

  “Didn’t mean to. I asked Tagan if I could show you around the landing while they hook up the next bunch of logs.” His voice sounded bitter, as if it tasted bad that he had to ask Tagan for permission on anything.

  She looked down the hill at Tagan, who was watching her with his hands on his hips. He nodded once. He had told Connor he could show her around then.

  “Okay,” Brooke said, unsteadily getting to her feet.

  She gathered her things, but Connor took the satchel and shouldered it. “Let me,” he said, folding Tagan’s jacket over his forearm and offering her a hand as she climbed down the boulder. With a polite smile, she hid her desire for Tagan and his touch right now. After she slipped her palm from Connor’s, she made her way down the hillside with him.

  Drew was sawing loops of cables, and he looked up and grinned as they passed. A whistle blasted, and she hunched into herself against the noise. It had been sounding all morning, but down here, it was almost deafening.

  “That’s Denison letting Kellen know he is clear to drag the lumber up the hill. It means everyone is out of the way,” Connor explained.

  “Oh.”

  A whistled sounded from farther off, and she looked at him with arched eyebrows.

  “That’s the Gray Backs. Their site isn’t too far away. Close enough for us to hear their whistle.”

  “Doesn’t Kellen get confused between the two?”

  “Not now. If our boss moves our sites closer together, it could cause a problem.” His blond hair fluttered in the breeze under his hard hat, and dimples bracketed his mouth as he smiled and dragged his gaze from her boots to her eyes. “Damn girl, you do look good in a hard hat.”

  Brooke narrowed her eyes. “You work the processor, right?”

  Lightning cracked in the distance, and the clouds above let off the first drops of an early spring storm. Cold splats of water hit her arms as she crossed them over her chest like a shield.

  “Come on, I’ll show you the machine I work. The boys will stop for lunch soon, but we’ve got a few minutes.”

  The cab of the machine was small but fit them both comfortably…if she sat on Connor’s knee, which he insisted on until she growled and gave in. He showed her all the levers and what they did, and then he placed her hand on the main one and guided her through picking up a log and stripping it. She had to admit, having control of heavy machinery was empowering and addictive. She did three more logs with Connor’s help, then one by herself. It was then that she noticed Connor’s hands on her waist, his thumbs stroking her back.

  Stiffening, she jerked away from him. “I think I should go.”

  “Go where?” he asked, gripping her waist again.

  “Stop it, Connor. I’m with Tagan.” She didn’t know why she said that. They weren’t to the phase yet when they were claiming each other publicly, but Connor was way too handsy for her comfort. He was charming and handsome, but sometimes his eyes went cold, like they were doing now, and he reminded her of Markus.

  “He has no claim to you, Brooke. That’s not how this works. Not up here with us.”

  “What?” she asked, backing out of the doorway.

  Connor stood and ducked the frame. “Tagan has to abide by rules, just like the rest of us do. You aren’t with him, Brooke. You aren’t with anyone. I have just as much right to you as he does.”

  The metal steps had grown slick in the rain that was coming down harder now. Panic clogged her throat. Markus had followed her like this, stalked her until she was cornered. She wouldn’t let that happen again with another man as long as she lived. Swallowing a whimper, she climbed down the side of the machine as fast as she could.

  “What are you doing?” Connor yelled and grabbed her jacket.

  A scream lodged in her throat as she bucked away from his touch, away from Connor and Markus and anyone who wanted to hurt her. Her vision blurred with her frantic need to escape, and she lurched out of her jacket. Losing her balance, she tumbled down the last step and tried to catch herself on the grate.

  The scream she’d tried to swallow burst out as Connor reached for her and missed. Pain, jagged and dark, slashed up her arm as she caught sharp metal and tumbled to the ground. She landed hard in the damp dirt below. Her tailbone ached, but that wasn’t what had her gasping in pain. Her hand wept red from a deep gash across her palm. Her nerve endings were burning, and she clutched it to her chest so she wouldn’t see the crimson anymore.

  “Fuck, why did you do that?” Connor yelled. “I was trying to catch you and you jerked away from me!” He jumped to the ground beside her, looking pissed.

  His shadow covered her as tears streamed down the side of her face, but he disappeared with a grunt.

  “Let me see it,” Tagan said softly, suddenly there. He tugged at her hand and opened her fingers with a gentle touch. “Shit.” He stood and glared at Connor, who was sitting in the mud with a look of pure hatred. “I said you could show her around, Connor. I trusted you not to let her get hurt.”

  “She jerked away from me when I was trying to catch her!”

  “Were you pushing up on her?”

  Connor’s eyes narrowed. “I have just as much right to her as you do. More so even. I called her. I saw her first.”

  “So that’s a yes. She’s an abuse victim, you asshole. You can’t handle her like that! She’s not some plaything you claim as your own like some spoiled child.”

  “But the rules say—”

  “Fuck the rules.” Tagan was yelling now, and red crept up his neck until he looked truly scary. His eyes looked different. His face looked savage.

  Brooke stood slowly, clutching her throbbing hand to her stomach. “It’s okay. It was my fault. I felt cornered and panicked. Please don’t fight.”

  All of the men gathered around them now, shifting their weight like they were uncomfortable. Kellen shoved through the crowd and pulled her hand out to examine it. Her palm felt like it h
ad been lit on fire when he pried her fingers open.

  “Fuck the rules?” Connor asked, blond eyebrows arched high. “Those rules are in place to keep us safe. To keep us alive. To keep us from killing each other like the old-timers did!”

  “No, this rule is an old-timer rule. It’s archaic and doesn’t fit anymore.”

  “The claiming rule is archaic?” an unfamiliar man asked from the outskirts of the loose circle.

  The change in the Ashe Crew was instant. Lowering themselves, tilting their chins to expose their necks, casting their eyes downward. Kellen sank to his knees beside her, but Tagan remained upright, his shoulders rigid as he backed protectively in front of her.

  “That’s right,” Tagan snarled, his voice dipping low and gravelly. “Choosing a woman shouldn’t just be on the man. She should have a say in it, too.”

  “Choosing a woman? Don’t you mean choosing a mate, Second?” The man stepped into the center of the circle. He was tall and lean as a whip. He stood straight, his chin high as he looked down at her, as if he knew his place in the world, and it was on top of the food chain. His sandy brown hair was cropped short, and he had the most unusual color of brown-green eyes.

  His hand snaked out and grabbed hers in a lightning fast move. She moaned in pain as he spread her fingers wide. She struggled to rid herself of his agonizing grasp, but he held on tighter with surprising strength. “You aren’t healing.” He slid a cold glance to Tagan. “And she smells like you. Fucking a human, are we?” He made a clucking sound behind his teeth and shook his head.

  His words made her insides turn to jagged shards of ice. A human? Connor stood, and a slow smile transformed his face to something wicked.

  “Don’t.” Tagan inched closer to her and cocked his head, his eyes pleading with the stranger. “Please don’t, Jed. She can leave. She’s not a part of this place.”

  “Ha,” Jed huffed out. “Not yet.” He yanked her arm and threw her into the center of the circle. She landed hard in the mud on her hands and knees and whimpered at the pain in her hand as it hit wet earth.

  I got a call from Connor yesterday that brought me back early. He said a challenge has been issued. He rolled his head and glared at Tagan with an empty smile. “Now, you know how much I like a good bear fight.”

  Tagan crouched down in front of Brooke, and a snarl ripped through his body.

  Brooke’s heart was pounding so hard her chest hurt. She couldn’t catch her breath as panic choked her. What had she stumbled into? She thought these were her friends, but maybe she was wrong.

  “Jed,” Kellen said. “Tagan’s right on this one.”

  Jed reached back and slapped Kellen across the cheek. But when Brooke looked back at him, four perfect, deep claw marks were etched into his skin, and Jed’s nails now looked inhumanly long.

  “Holy shit,” she whispered. “Tagan, what’s happening?” She touched his back, but the muscles there were stiff and unyielding. His only answer was the furious-sounding, inhuman growl that rattled from his chest. This wasn’t like the one he gave her when he was happy. This was the most dangerous sound she’d ever heard.

  “I forbid you to change,” Jed spat out at Kellen. He jabbed a finger at Denison and smiled cruelly. “I forbid you to change.” He went around the circle and said it to everyone but Connor and Tagan.

  The others looked at her with helpless expressions, as if they wanted to do something but couldn’t. Brighton fell to his knees, gritting his teeth, and she could’ve sworn moisture rimmed his eyes.

  “Connor,” Jed said, “you issued a formal challenge for Second and for this piece of shit human. I don’t know why you want her. She’s not very curvy or womanly looking, and she reeks of Tagan, but hey. To each his own. You want a challenge? As your alpha, I sanction it. First to Turn her gets her.”

  “No!” Tagan yelled, his voice transforming to a roar that rattled the trees.

  Brooke stared in horror as Connor’s face elongated and his body became bigger. Fur shot from his skin, dark and thick, and with a series of pops that sounded like snapping bones, an enormous grizzly bear burst from him.

  Tagan’s hand was on her leg as he pushed her backward, inch by inch. “Do you choose him?” he asked in a strained voice.

  Connor-the-bear lowered to all four legs and stepped forward.

  She couldn’t breathe. This wasn’t happening. Bears didn’t come out of men. They just didn’t. She blinked rain from her eyes as another sob tore from her throat.

  Tagan turned and repeated louder, “Do you choose him? Do you choose this life?”

  “No!” she screamed. Of course she didn’t fucking choose Connor. He was a bear! A bear who was stalking closer like he was going to kill her.

  “Brooke,” Tagan said. The seriousness of his tone pulled her attention. “Run.”

  “I don’t understand—”

  “Run!” he bellowed, his voice sounding fearsome as it tapered off into a snarl.

  Chest heaving, she backed away slowly. Her body felt numb. If she tried to escape now, her legs would lock up and she’d fall again.

  Tagan stood slowly in the fine mist as Connor charged, shaking the earth with every pounding step.

  And just as he reached Tagan, a blond-colored grizzly exploded from the man she loved.

  “Bear, bear, bear,” she chanted under her breath as the two locked in a violent battle.

  “Run, Brooke,” Kellen gritted out. His face sagged, as if the effort to say that had leeched his energy. Red dripped in rivers down his face, but already, the slashes across his cheek were beginning to close. “Please,” he begged in a broken whisper.

  And suddenly, she wasn’t numb anymore. She wanted to live. She’d survived Markus, and her drive to outlast Jed’s sick order was enough to dump adrenaline into her veins and make her want to fight. Legs pumping, she blasted through the circle and away from the bears. An echoing slap and bellow of pain sounded, and she flinched, hoping desperately that Tagan would be okay. He was back there trying to protect her. She didn’t understand any of this. Couldn’t wrap her head around what had just happened, but she knew that deep down, bear or not, Tagan was trying to buy her precious time.

  She ran down the slippery road, her boots growing heavier with each step as mud caked them. Pushing her legs harder, she lifted her knees higher to accommodate the added weight. The pain in her hand was nothing but a dull ache now as she ran for her life. She threw the door to Tagan’s truck open and scrambled in as fast as she could.

  “Key, keys, keys,” she whispered, searching frantically for them with trembling fingers. Glinting metal shone from the cup holder, and she grabbed the jingling chain and jammed the biggest key into the steering column. The engine turned and roared to life.

  She’d done well not to look behind her, but now, with the truck facing the landing, it was impossible for her to avoid it. She had to see if Tagan was okay before she spun out of here.

  Fumbling to turn on the windshield wipers, her eyes went wide as she got a glimpse of the dark grizzly, Connor, charging her way with Tagan on his heels. With a shriek, she jammed the gas and spun out in a wide circle, the tailgate hovering right at the edge of the road before she straightened out and fishtailed her way down toward the trailer park.

  She was sobbing now, trying hard to fit the world into what it used to be. One where she wasn’t called a human like it was a curse word and where giant snarling bears didn’t live inside of men.

  Tagan was a bearman. A werebear? He’d played her. Strung her along as if they had a chance at a future. So many secrets. Clearly he was part of a world she didn’t understand and didn’t belong in, and now because she’d unknowingly gotten in too deep, she was fighting for her life. Tagan was fighting for her life, too.

  She should’ve left Asheland Mobile Park that first day, just like her instincts had screamed for her to.

  Her rearview mirror was terrifying. It showed Connor gaining on her. Tagan slammed him against the side of the mounta
in, but the dark-furred grizzly wouldn’t be deterred. His eyes seethed with rage—a black fury that said he was going to kill her.

  She was already going dangerously fast but pressed the gas to the floorboard anyway. If she flew off the side of the cliff, it would be a less painful death than the one that was coming for her. At each curve, she drew nearer to the edge of the road as she slid this way and that. Desperate to keep control of the truck, she gripped the steering wheel until her knuckles went white. The tail end of the truck flew sideways and smashed into the rock face that shot up toward the heavens. She lurched in her seat and screamed as she tried to straighten out again.

  Connor hit the back of the truck again, and as soon as she gained control, a quick peek into the rearview showed Tagan lunging and sinking his teeth into the dark bear’s neck. She sped off and left them there, wiping her rainwater soaked hair away from her eyes. She narrowed her gaze on the road in front of her and vowed that she was going to make it out of this alive.

  The road led right past the trailer park. The truck had been damaged in Connor’s attacks and made a metallic clanking noise that grew louder and louder by the moment. She hit the gravel road to the trailers but slammed on her brakes when she almost barreled into a massive gray-colored bear.

  “I don’t understand,” she whispered. Jed told his crew they couldn’t turn into bears, right? It sounded important when he’d said it, as if they couldn’t disobey. So why was this bear allowed to break the rule he’d set?

  Her eyes went wide as he stood to his full height in front of her.

  Unless this was Jed.

  “Oh, shit,” she murmured.

  The bear stood between her and the Volvo, and Tagan’s truck sure wasn’t going to make it to town with the noises it was making. She needed her car to escape. Gripping the wheel, she screamed, “Come on!” and slammed her foot onto the gas.

  Jed charged, but she stayed the course until the last possible moment. Then she slammed on the brake and jerked the wheel, spinning the truck until the back of it smashed into the bear.

  The driver’s side door ripped off before she’d recovered from the deploying air bag.