by Sabre Rose
“You alright there, buddy? Gabe asked. “You look almost pissed off. Is something bothering you?”
I smiled tightly. “No, nothing at all.”
Dumping the remaining drinks on the table, I walked out to the storeroom. I needed to get away. I needed to breathe. I knew what he was doing, but I was annoyed that despite that knowledge, I was still insanely jealous. I wanted to walk out there and slap that girl. I also wanted to sit on Gabe’s lap and devour him, even though he was acting impossibly stupid and immature.
“Everything okay in here?” Gabe said as he poked his head around the corner and leaned on the doorway.
“Fine.” I grabbed a bag of coffee beans and held them up. “I just needed more beans.”
“At the end of a shift?” Gabe grinned wickedly and stepped further into the doorway, blocking my exit.
“Yes, at the end of a shift.” I pushed against him. “Move, Gabe.”
Even though he was stumbling before, now he stood tall and solid, without a hint of drunkenness apart from the glaze to his eyes. I pushed against his chest but it didn’t move him an inch. I’d never been considered a small girl, but standing there, trapped by him, I felt a little helpless. It grew hot and I became overwhelmed, feeling confined, yet exposed.
“Move, Gabe,” I said again, this time more gently. “Please.”
He slid out of the way and I felt his gaze burn into me as I walked back out into the café.
“Everything okay back there?” Peta asked when I reappeared.
“He’s drunk,” I replied.
“No kidding.”
Gabe sauntered back to the table and Haleigh walked up behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist before snaking them up his chest. Gabe’s eyes never left mine, and even when I tried to look away, I couldn’t. He grabbed at Haleigh’s arm and pulled her around to face him, lowering his head and kissing her deeply, watching for my reaction.
I felt sick.
“Yuck,” Peta said beside me. “That’s not an image I wanted to be burned in my mind. And just think.” She patted my leg. “That could have been you.” She laughed and I did my best to laugh too. Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out my phone and texted Derek.
Me: See you tonight.
19
LAUREN
Derek was waiting on the doorstep with his overnight bag when I arrived home. It was the same bag that was packed and ready to go when he left. We easily fell back into the old routine. While I cooked a simple dinner, he watched TV. I joined him on the couch after I had done the dishes, and he slipped his arm around me. It felt right. And wrong. His arm felt like it had always been there, but it just didn’t fit anymore.
I managed to keep my thoughts from Gabe, but in the process, they wound up thinking of the lying-man-stealing-bitch and wondering just how much he had shared with her. Did they talk about me? Did he sit, just like this, with his arm around her while they watched TV in their apartment? What was she doing now? Did she know he had come back to me? And then I started thinking of Gabe, and Haleigh’s hands all over him. I imagined ripping her hands away and replacing them with mine.
The programme ended and I looked up to find Derek staring at me. “Where were you?” he asked.
“What to do mean?”
“It looked as though you were miles away.”
He smiled softly and I leaned into him a little more. “I wasn’t anywhere other than right here.”
Leaning over, he planted a kiss on my head, inhaling my scent. “I missed this smell.”
I squeezed my eyes shut and pushed away the sharp questions that kept blistering on my tongue. “It’s just shampoo.”
The DVD cover left on the table caught his attention. “Zombies?” he asked. “I didn’t pick you for a zombie lover.”
I laughed nervously and pushed the cover away. “Someone at work suggested it.”
“Did she not know that you only watch reality shows?”
I laughed again but didn’t correct him.
After a few awkward moments of silence when we both pretended to be interested in the ads flashing across the screen, Derek spoke. “Shall we go to bed?”
I looked at the clock. It was nine thirty. “It’s a little early, isn’t it?”
Derek stood up and held his hands out. “I’m at the gym early six days a week.” He pulled me to my feet. “You should come with me sometime.”
I laughed. “Yeah, good luck with that.”
“It would do you good to get some exercise back in your life.”
“Oh, so a few gym sessions and you’re Mr Well-Life? Don’t forget I knew you back in the day when walking from the couch from the fridge was all the exercise you got.”
“Not anymore, my dear,” he called as he walked down the hall.
We undressed, smiling awkwardly at each other. He stepped out of his clothes and left them where they lay while I folded each clean item and put it away, before tossing the dirty ones into the clothing bin. Derek stripped down and I noticed he was wearing jockeys instead of boxers like he used to. He looked good. His shoulders were broader, his stomach smaller and tighter. And then I wondered if the jockeys were the lying-man-stealing-bitch’s preference.
I blocked out all thoughts and pulled my night shirt out of the drawers.
“Don’t,” Derek said, climbing into bed. “Please?”
Shyly, I put the shirt away and lay in bed beside him with only my bra and underpants on. We weren’t touching, but somehow, I was nervous. Would things be different? Would he be different?
Derek moved closer and reached out to stroke my breast. “I’ve missed these too.” His fingers dug into my flesh and I squirmed. “Sorry,” he chuckled. “I guess I’m just a little eager. It’s been a while.”
There it was again. It’s been a while. A while since he had slept with anyone, or simply a while since he had slept with me? He pawed at me again, and I resisted the urge to crawl away. I needed to relax. I needed to get all other thoughts out of my mind and concentrate on Derek.
Propping himself up on his elbow, he leaned in for a kiss. “I’ve missed your lips,” he whispered.
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! The words echoed around my head. Did it not occur to him that there was only one reason why he had missed all these things?
He sucked on my neck and I tried to melt into it. Moving so he was on top of me, he pressed his erection against my stomach. “Something else missed you too,” he said, grinning.
Really? Wasn’t it otherwise occupied?
Derek reached over to grab a condom from the pocket of his jeans and I wondered how long he had carried condoms in his pocket.
I needed to get out of my head. I thought about getting up and grabbing a bottle of wine, but it probably would have been a little rude. Sorry honey, I need to be drunk to fuck you.
Derek was clearly ready to go. I just wished I was. I tried kissing him. I let my tongue slip into his mouth as he tugged at my underwear. I helped him pull them down and he sank into me, only I wasn’t ready and it took a little adjustment before he could move easily. I gripped onto his shoulders and he smiled softly as he moved in and out.
Thoughts of coffee beans ran through my head and I hooked my legs around his, pulling him closer to me and causing him to grunt with each thrust. Removing himself he started to slide down my body, positioning his mouth between my legs but I pulled him back up. “Not tonight,” I said as alluringly as I could muster. “Tonight it’s just about you.”
As his movements grew quicker, I grabbed his backside and dug my fingernails in with full knowledge of what it did to him. Crying out, he shuddered as he came.
* * *
Derek’s alarm sounded at five in the morning. Rolling over, he kissed my cheek. “Morning.” I grunted and turned away but he pulled me back. “Come to the gym with me,” he said, tapping my nose repeatedly.
I swatted his hand and tried to pull away. Reaching out, he turned on the light and I buried my head under the covers. “It�
��s not morning,” I groaned.
He ripped the sheets off, letting the cool air flow over my skin which immediately prickled with goose bumps. “Come to the gym with me,” he said again and started jiggling the bed.
“It’s still night.” I squeezed my eyes shut to block out the bright light but he was insistent. “Fine,” I finally growled.
He smiled and pecked a kiss on the tip of my nose. “It’s a new day,” he said.
“Since when did you become so peppy?” Crawling out of bed, I made my way to the ensuite. I tried to wake myself with a shower but the water did nothing but lull me back to a warm place, and all too soon, Derek poked his head onto the bathroom.
“Come on,” he urged. “Let’s go.”
I stumbled out of the shower, pulled on my jogging pants and an old hoodie and followed him out to the car. He slapped my backside as I climbed into the Beemer.
“You’re wearing those?” he asked.
“We’re going to a gym, aren’t we?”
“Hmmm,” he said getting in the driver’s side and turning over the engine.
“Hmmm, what?” I asked, glaring at him.
He laughed at my stern expression. “Hmmm, nothing. I didn’t say a word.”
The gym was basically a garage behind someone’s house. It was dirty and cold. Derek introduced me to his trainer, Evan, and started warming up by skipping.
“Going to join in today, love?” Evan asked.
I looked over to where Derek was jumping up and down repeatedly, his shirt flapping with the movement, and shook my head. I could only imagine what my jiggle would look like while doing that. “Think I’ll sit this one out and just watch.”
I wrapped my arms around myself and rubbed vigorously, trying to get rid of the coldness that had seeped into my bones.
“A week today!” Evan shouted in Derek’s ear as he skipped. “Are you ready?”
“Hell yeah!” Derek growled. I laughed as he looked over and winked at me. This was definitely a new side to Derek.
By the time they had finished, Derek was drenched with sweat. Even though they were only training, Evan insisted he wear full protection to get a feel for how he would need to move on the night, and his dark hair was plastered to his head from being trapped under it. Derek spat his mouth guard onto the ground when Evan slapped him on the back, congratulating him on the effort he had put in. I was impressed. I had never seen Derek fight and his punches seem strong and sure. Maybe not as strong and sure as Gabe’s had been the time I saw him at a punching bag, but still good. Evan left him standing in the ring, leaning on the ropes and panting, telling him he would see him bright and early Monday morning.
“That fat prick Hofstadter doesn’t stand a chance,” Derek said, rubbing a towel over the back of his neck and head, wiping away the dripping sweat. “Just you wait, lugging all that extra weight around means he’ll be slow. I’ll knock him out flat, just you wait and see.”
“Fat doesn’t always mean slow,” I said, still smarting from his non-remark concerning my jogging pants.
“Really,” he smirked. “Do tell me what it means then, my dearest.” He pulled up the ropes and slipped under them to join me back down on the cold concrete.
“Fat could mean strong,” I suggested. Derek picked me up and whirled me around. “Put me down! You’re all sweaty.”
He laughed and pulled me tighter, planting a sloppy kiss on my mouth. “It’s going to be great seeing that smirk wiped off his face.” He placed me back on my feet but still held onto me, grabbing my behind and jerking me close. He ground against me a few times until I felt him harden. “You just wait and see,” he growled in my ear, rubbing his mouth over my skin.
“Derek,” I said warily, trying to pull away. But he held me tight. “Not here,” I said, tugging at his arms and looking around for any sign of Evan.
“Why not? Evan’s gone now and I’m rather worked up.”
I slapped his shoulder. “What’s gotten into you?” Derek never used to be this adventurous. He was strictly a bedroom only man. A ripple of excitement tingled down deep, but it was quickly followed by the cold sensation of realising what would have made him that way.
Releasing me, Derek walked over to where Evan had left the door open behind him, shutting it and pulling the lock across.
“Are you sure he’s left,” I asked.
“There’s no one here but you and me.”
Pulling me close, he assaulted me with his lips. He tasted of salt and sweat. Reaching down, he slipped his hand into my pants and his fingers rubbed against me as we kissed. The thrill of the unknown meant, despite my hesitation, I was ready. Hastily, Derek turned me around and guided my hands to the rope of the ring. Roughly tugging down my pants, he entered me. He was rough and fast and reached a climax quickly, pulling up my pants, and slapping my butt, in what seemed like a matter of seconds.
“Maybe I like those pants after all,” he said.
20
LAUREN
The gym was the last time Derek touched me for a week, telling me he needed to reserve his energy for the fight. We spent every night together, but we didn’t even kiss as he said his resolve would waver and he needed all the help in the ring he could get.
Entering Derek’s apartment for the first time unsettled me. There was artwork on the walls and vases filled with fake flowers which I knew he hadn’t chosen. Even the colour scheme, bold and bright, reminded me another woman had been here.
It was the night of the fight and I was waiting on Derek as he anxiously fluffed his hair. “I don’t even know why I’m worried, it’s just going to get all sweaty and flat under the headgear anyway,” he said.
I leaned against the white tiles in the bathroom. “You’ll be great.” I smiled at his reflection in the mirror.
He turned to face me, giving up on fixing whatever he thought was wrong with his hair. He was dressed in a matching tracksuit, his dinner suit hanging in a bag over the bathroom door. “Did I tell you Hofstadter pulled out?”
“He did?”
Derek grabbed the suit and walked out the door. “Yep. Couldn’t handle the thought of losing to me. Whimp.”
“So who are you fighting now?”
Derek shrugged. “Does it matter?” He bounced on his feet a few times and threw quick, short jabs into the air. “Whoever it is, is going to suffer.”
“You’ve remembered it’s for charity, haven’t you?”
“You know that even charity fights are real, don’t you?” He swung me around and pulled me close. “I can’t wait until after the fight either,” he said, kissing me firmly before pulling away. “Oh yeah. You and me after the fight.” He let out a whoop and pumped the air.
I looked in the hallway mirror, ignoring the ornate gold-plated frame that Derek would have never chosen, and studied my reflection. I had bought a tight, silver dress for the occasion that hugged all the right curves and hid all the wrong ones. Derek had insisted on paying for me to get my hair and makeup done and my hair fell in thick loose curls around my face. Even I thought I looked pretty.
I had tried to get Peta and Shrek tickets but they were all sold out, so I was resigned to sitting with a group of Derek’s workmates. My old workmates. I imagined the entire night smiling stiffly while they all internally commented on the state of my relationship. I would have refused to go if Derek hadn’t been so desperate to have me there.
We pulled up in the taxi and Derek kissed me before heading off to where the fighters waited to be called to the ring. I scanned the crowded room, looking for Derek’s workmates who waved me over. Doing my best to make small talk, I chatted politely. I had worked with these people but I barely knew them. I mainly stayed trapped inside Derek’s office and chose not to attend many of the numerous work functions and dinners they had. In hindsight, maybe I should have.
“Do you think it’s real?” Preston, the second best real estate agent in the company, leaned over and asked. Derek, of course, was the best. He managed to walk t
hat fine line between pushy and charming and non-threatening. I looked where he nodded and saw Simon Hofstadter sitting at a table, his leg awkwardly poking out at a straight angle and wrapped in a cast.
“I don’t see why he would be faking,” I replied, not willing to be dragged into the rivalry between the two companies.
“Derek’s got to face some little—”
I didn’t listen to the rest of what he had to say as I spotted Mark sitting across the table from Simon. It wasn’t until then it occurred to me that they had the same last name. “Excuse me for a moment,” I said, patting Preston’s arm absently and walking over to Mark.
“Well, well, if it isn’t the wife of your would-be opponent,” Mark said to his brother as he stood to embrace me. “Do you know Simon?”
“We’ve met once or twice.” I held out my hand and smiled. Derek was right, Simon was a big man and looked nothing like his brother. Only fat wouldn’t have been the word I would have used to describe him. Bulky would have suited better. If I was Derek, I would be pleased he had pulled out.
“Lovely to meet you again, my dear,” Simon said and kissed the hand I held out.
I laughed at his display. “I never knew you two were brothers.” Simon looked a little confused. “I work with Mark,” I said, nodding to Mark.
“You don’t work with your husband anymore?”
I shook my head. “He was my fiancé. Sorry,” I corrected, “is my fiancé.” I stalled, knowing that wasn’t right either. “We haven’t worked together for a few months now.”
“Well if you’re ever looking to move on, I know of someone who would be only too grateful to nab a personal assistant with skills such as your own.” He winked and said, “Me.”
“That’s very kind of you but I’m quite happy where I am for the moment.”
Simon smiled and pulled out the chair beside him, indicating I should sit. “Well, I owe enough to your workplace as it is for getting me out of this pickle.”
“I’m sorry?” I turned to Mark for an explanation but he wouldn’t meet my eye.