by dlavieri
sent out 83 releases resulting in at least 327 media clips? If you
keep a running log of frequent and important activities, you’ll
always be able to show off what you’ve done in a powerful,
streamlined way.
→ Note problems and solutions. Not everything you deal with
generates good fodder for your “love me” file. At times you may
have to address controversies, complaints, or even clean up a
Be Prepared with clever ways to Brag
75
mess after you make the wrong call. Smart professionals face up
to tough issues and find a way to remedy errors. As time goes
by, however, other people may remember the problem, but not
what was done to manage it. So you may need a record of mat-
ters you’ve successfully handled.
If you record your activity as you go along and keep track of the positive
feedback, you’ll always be able to produce a quick summary of your career
highlights. Beyond that, your files will bring insights into how you do your
best work and reassure you when you feel discouraged.
16
get the “It” factor:
create Presence
clients whom I’m coaching often ask, “How do I get executive presence?”
The question is tricky because “executive presence” isn’t easily defined.
Most folks agree that leaders need it and great leaders have it. But it’s not so simple to deconstruct its elements.
Your definition may be based on a leader you know who has a com-
manding aura. You know what I mean—someone who exudes confidence
and attracts people like a magnet. Sometimes the value of executive presence
seems most obvious when it’s missing. I’m thinking of Ed*, a brilliant cor-
porate attorney who was repeatedly overlooked when spots opened within
his company’s management ranks. When I asked the COO whether Ed was
likely to be promoted, she said, “No. He’ll always be valued as a talented
technical lawyer, but we’re not going to move him up. Ed just doesn’t have
executive presence.”
The COO didn’t try to define “executive presence,” but I knew what she
meant. The attorney could write memos like a dream. When asked a question,
however, he seemed hesitant. He’d mumble, then he’d shuffle down the hall.
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get the “It” factor: create Presence
77
He just didn’t have “It.” He didn’t radiate that assurance, that dignity, that sense of control that others see as “executive presence.”
Use this checklist to build presence
Do you sometimes worry that you don’t have enough of that “It” factor? Do
you fear you’ll miss out on career opportunities, despite your great work,
because you lack a powerful demeanor? Presence is an elusive quality, like
love or happiness; you can’t just pick some up. But you can do a great deal to appear more like a leader. You can build your presence by changing the ways
you look and behave, and even how you think and feel about yourself.
Here’s a checklist of key factors that contribute to executive presence.
If you want to enhance your gravitas, read through the questions and find
points to work on:
1) Do you have a leadership vision? As we discussed in Chapter
5, it’s easier to act like a leader when you have a clear sense of the
attributes of leadership. If you can’t easily describe your vision of a
leader, list characteristics you admire, such as reliability, honesty,
or a positive attitude. Look at your list frequently so that you’re
reminded to incorporate these traits into your daily behavior.
2) Do you seem organized? If you’re typically late, if your papers
are a mess, and if you have trouble meeting deadlines, then your
presence is compromised. Colleagues may see you as disorga-
nized and unable to get the job done. Suzy* is a communications
consultant who thought of herself as a ditzy, creative type. She’d
explain away her lateness by saying, “Oh, you know us artists.”
But finally she realized that her firm’s partners regarded her as a
bit out of control. She saw they weren’t going to promote her to
the role of client manager until something changed. Suzy got her
calendar and other systems in order. And, significantly, she told
all her colleagues that she was working with a coach to become
more productive and organized. She reshaped her brand, and
soon she was managing client accounts.
3) Do you need a makeover? It may not be fair, but physical
appearance is an integral part of presence. To look like an execu-
tive, it helps to be well groomed and well dressed. If your clothes
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Think Like an Entrepreneur, Act Like a CEO
are dated and untidy, or your hair is always messy, you may come
across as unpolished and not management material.
4) Can you make a presentation? The ability to give a speech or
contribute useful remarks at a meeting will enhance your pres-
ence. Of course, you have to be clear and concise. But it’s also
important to know how to engage with other people. Present
your points in a way that makes them relevant to the audience.
Listen carefully to questions and comments, and respond with-
out becoming defensive.
5) Do you say what you mean? Whether you’re speaking to a
crowd or chatting one-on-one, you’ll have more gravitas if you
speak directly, without hesitation or self-deprecation. Ask col-
leagues to observe the way you talk, so they can help you spot
self-critical phrasing or annoying habits like starting sentences
with phrases like, “I’m not an expert, but . . .” If you sound like
you’re uncertain of what you’re saying, you can’t expect others to
be convinced.
6) How’s your vitality? Managing your presence requires taking
charge of your energy level. If you’re sleep deprived, bored, or out
of shape, you’re less likely to come across as a leader. Being fran-
tic isn’t good either, because your hyperactivity can translate into
stress for those around you. To appear more powerful, be serious
about maintaining good health and fitness, and stay calm with
practices like meditation.
7) Do you know how to appear more confident? People with
executive presence seem cool and ready to handle any situation.
But a superb record may not be enough to give professionals a
belief in their own ability to master the next crisis. And even
if they do know they can perform, that knowledge may not be
apparent to others. A good starting point for boosting your con-
fidence level, and making sure it shows, is to manage the voice in
your head, as we discussed in Chapter 7.
8) What’s your body saying? Your nonverbal behavior can be
even more important than your words. At least on an uncon-
scious level, people make judgments based on your posture,
facial expressions, and even your fleeting microexpressions. They
may even “mirror” your smile or the way you are holding your
get the “It” factor: create Presence
79
body, with their emotions shifting to more closely match yours.
&nbs
p; And, according to fascinating research from psychologists like
Harvard’s Amy Cuddy, your own brain also picks up those mes-
sages from your body and face. If you assume the stance of a
confident person, your mind and emotions may follow, helping
you to soon feel more confidence.
Although the concept of presence is complicated, I’ve seen professionals
make speedy improvements in the way they come across. For example, there’s
Lydia*, an accomplished economist whose concern about details translates
into successful projects. But Lydia is such a perfectionist that, when handed a new assignment, she tends to immediately start fretting about the best way to start. Her boss told me that Lydia didn’t appear sure about her plans because of her worried demeanor. People hesitated to follow her directions because she often looked so anxious and uncertain.
Lydia understood that she’d be a better leader if she could appear more
decisive. To work on this, she explored various forms of “self-talk” before settling on two techniques. First, before entering a meeting, she would define
her intent for the occasion. It might be something such as, “I’m going to raise point X and come across as interested and positive.” Then she’d encourage
herself with repeated affirmations such as, “My plan is on target and I know
it will work.”
Lydia also became conscious of her body language, and realized that
when anxious she’d bow her head, cross her arms, and hunch her shoulders.
Inspired by Dr. Cuddy’s moving TED Talk, “Your Body Language Shapes
Who You Are,” she began practicing “power posing.” Before making a pre-
sentation or attending an important event, she would go through a quick
series of exercises, like holding her arms up high in a V shape. She said that the poses did seem to make her feel surer of herself. She also started regular yoga classes again and found that they helped her body stop feeling—and
looking—so tense.
I spoke with Lydia’s boss a few months after she began working on her
presence and he was surprised by her transformation in such a short time.
Building presence can mean work on
many levels
There is much you can do to rapidly enhance your executive presence. And, on
a deeper level, you can continue to strengthen your presence through exercises
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Think Like an Entrepreneur, Act Like a CEO
intended to develop the level of your self-awareness. Use these questions to
check in with four aspects of yourself:
1) Your physical self:
◆
How is my posture? Am I tense? Shall I relax my shoulders
and other parts of my body?
◆
What is the expression on my face? Am I frowning? Is my
jaw clenched? Can I generate a smile?
◆
How is my breathing? Is it shallow or hurried? Is it time for
a deep, slow breath?
2) Your intellectual self:
◆
Has that internal voice been nagging me with worries and
regrets? Shall I put them aside for now?
◆
What are my top goals for the day? For the next hour?
◆
What is my plan for reaching my most immediate goal?
◆
Is it time to shift my focus away from my own problems
and onto another person?
3) Your emotional self:
◆
Has there been a moment today when I experienced an
intense emotion? What was it?
◆
Did that surge of emotion impact the way I responded to
another person?
◆
What am I feeling now?
◆
Are there feelings I want to let go, before going back to
work?
4) Your spiritual self:
◆
What key values will help me with the decisions I must
make today?
◆
Have my activities so far today been in keeping with the
values that matter the most to me?
◆
What are three things I feel grateful for?
◆
Is it time for a moment of meditation, affirmation, or a
quick prayer?
◆
Can I help someone?
17
to make a career
shift, start with one
grain of sugar
we all go through puzzling or difficult times. And sometimes we need
a major change, perhaps even a new professional direction. You’re the boss of your career. So when it’s time to go another direction, you’re the one who must come up with a plan.
But what do you do when you don’t know where you want to go? There’s
no simple solution. Typically, what you must do is launch a process that sets the groundwork for your transition. From years of coaching experience, I
know that the difference between just dreaming about a new phase, and actu-
ally getting there, often comes from setting up a methodical process that helps you to create change a little bit at a time.
Create your change process
Whether you want to shift professional tracks or simply pump up your per-
formance in your current gig, setting up a change process that works for you
81
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Think Like an Entrepreneur, Act Like a CEO
will provide a clear starting point. When working with clients, I often suggest a technique for managing change that I’ve been using since I was a teenager.
When I was growing up, I followed my New Zealander parents’ example
and drank lots of tea. I liked it loaded with milk and sugar, but as a young
teen I started worrying about the calories. I didn’t want to give up my habit of drinking cups of tea every day after school, but kicking my sugar habit seemed too tough.
Then one day I was inspired to reduce the sugar so gradually that I’d
never miss it. As I sat at the kitchen table, staring at the heaping pile of sugar on my spoon, I decided to make progress by removing just a few granules. In
the following days, I estimated earlier volumes and tried to remove a few more grains. I kept at it, progressively lessening the amount of sugar from two or three spoonfuls to none. It took nearly a year, but I learned to enjoy sugarless tea without ever feeling deprived.
I was so intrigued by the power of creating change through small, pain-
less steps that I applied what I called “the Sugar Grain Principle” to other
aspects of my young life. For example, I became better at keeping my room
neat with very small steps, like routinely shutting the closet door or spending just five minutes cleaning each morning.
I remembered the Sugar Grain Principle years later, as a senior at Ohio
University. An injustice in the way female students were treated motivated me to support gender equality. I didn’t expect to actually change practices that were widespread, but I thought the Principle might help to frame a satisfying gesture, just for me.
I promised myself to do at least one small “thing” in support of greater
equality for university women every day. It didn’t have to be much. A “thing”
could be as small as a sugar grain. But I needed to come up with something—
anything—every single day.
It was easy at first. A day’s contribution might be as basic as speaking
in class about equality. But with time it became more difficult to find my
daily “thing,” and I was forced to move out of my comfort zone. To meet my
quota of sugar grains, I spoke at meetings, started a radio program focused
on gender equality, and became the first woman to enter the university’s
MBA program.
As I scrambled harder to define new “things,” I worried less about failure
and became more creative. Eventually, the president noticed, made me his
assistant, and asked me to write a detailed report on the status of women.
Most of the report’s recommendations were accepted, and ultimately I led
to make a career shift, start with one grain of sugar
83
Ohio University’s implementation of Title IX, the landmark federal legisla-
tion outlawing gender discrimination in education. I knew nothing about
institutional change, but I found my way one sugar grain at a time.
In my job, I met individually with scores of women, often encouraging
them to embark on career paths traditionally dominated by men. Still in my
20s, I was called upon to advise faculty members, and others far more expe-
rienced than I, who wanted to step into leadership or into fields traditionally closed to women.
I had no training in career development. Once again, I relied on my expe-
rience with gradual change. I developed a model that, at least inside my head, I called the “Sugar Grain Process.” I used the model to help professionals
rethink their goals and start taking steps in new directions.
Through the years I’ve repeatedly worked through the Sugar Grain
Process while navigating my own varied career. And I’ve shared the process
countless times, as a mentor, a manager, and coach.
I understand that the Sugar Grain Process is not unique and that many
similar models can create success. But I have 40 years of experience in fostering career change using this approach, and I am absolutely confident that it works.
How to change careers with the
sugar Grain Process
Let’s say you’re bored with the kind of work you’ve been doing, but you don’t know what you’d like to do next. If I were your coach, I’d suggest you go
through this five-part process:
1) Develop a vision of the career you want. Your “vision” is a wish
list of elements you’d like to see in your next career phase. Don’t