Axle’s Secret

by Arthurs, Nia

  “No. I found out a few days after we met.”

  She nods. “Okay.”

  I blink rapidly. On the plane ride over, I’d prepared myself for a wide variety of reactions. If she hit me, I’d stay still and let her. If she cried, I’d comfort her. If she cursed me out and told me to die, I’d consider it.

  But this? How could she be so calm?

  Ember lifts her chin. “I knew.”

  “You knew… what?”

  “That you were involved with my brother the night he died.”

  “What? How?”

  “When you left town and didn’t call, I thought it was my fault. I thought maybe you didn’t like me that much. Or I talked about my mom and brother too much. Then I remembered all the conversations we had that were interrupted. The moments it seemed you had something on your mind.”

  “You guessed I was there that night because of that?”

  “I started piecing things together. Your animosity with Seb, your aversion to Green Lake and this town, and the way you reacted when I first told you about Diandre. I called Kolby and forced him to recite everything he’d heard in the kitchen that day when you fought with Seb. Eventually, it all became clear.”

  “So… why didn’t you call me?”

  “Because I wanted to see what kind of man you were. I wanted to see if you would tell me the truth or leave me hanging forever.”

  I shake my head, imagining just how close I’d come to ignoring her. “Ember, I don’t expect you to forgive me, but I want you to know that I’m sorry.” My eyes well with tears. “The last thing I want to do is hurt you.”

  A tear trails down her cheek. “I believe you.”

  It’s a bitter-sweet ending to a bitter-sweet story. And in that moment, as I watch her tremble from grief and brokenness, I release a breath and let her go.

  24

  Ember

  I’ve grappled with my suspicions ever since Axle took off without a word. In hindsight, there were plenty of moments during our relationship when I should have figured things out.

  All those times Axle came to me, frazzled, intent, armed with his confession, I should have seen through it. But I didn’t notice a thing. Didn’t stop to wonder what he could possibly have to say to me.

  Love really is blind.

  And stupid.

  And painful.

  So painful.

  As I stare at Axle’s bowed head, I can tell that I’m not the only one who’s suffered these past ten years. He has too. My heart aches for him. For us. For my family.

  The truth is out. This is the moment I’ve been desperate for, but it’s not satisfying.

  Maybe I shouldn’t have waited for Axle to come back to me. My original plan was to go straight to Seb and demand answers, but I held myself back. Deep in my heart, I wanted Axle to be the one to tell me. I wanted to know the type of man I had fallen for.

  But the details of that night are even more painful than I imagined.

  I thought Diandre had gone into the lake as some sort of dare. I even considered the thought that he’d waded in with his friends and been left behind, falling prey to the frigid waters and furious waves.

  I was wrong.

  Diandre died because he danced with a girl. That’s it. Seb’s jealousy was so expensive, it cost another man his life.

  The punishment was harsh. Undeserved. No wonder Axle was furious when he saw Maribella on Seb’s arm. No wonder they argued that day in the kitchen and during every encounter since.

  Axle recognized the injustice, even if his loyalty and that stupid pact bound him to secrecy.

  A new rage builds inside me, a crackling fire that devours everything in its path. For ten years, Seb enjoyed life to the fullest. He got the girl, the opportunity to follow his dreams, to mature, to grow.

  My brother’s buried six feet deep with no opportunities to do the same.

  “I should go,” Axle says, rising to his feet.

  I follow him. “Where are you going?”

  “Back home.”

  “What?”

  “Ember…” He grips the doorknob. “I only came to tell you the truth.”

  “You’re running again? Really?” I snap. “After going through all this effort?”

  He whirls around. “I can’t face you, okay? Every time I look in your eyes, I feel so much guilt for what I’ve done. For what I’ve taken from you.”

  “Axle, listen to me.” I surge forward and cup his jaw, forcing him to meet my gaze. “You didn’t take anything. It wasn’t your fault.”

  His Adam’s apple bobs. “No, you’re wrong. I told Diandre… I told him he’d be okay. I promised he’d be okay.”

  The brokenness in his eyes rocks me. I reach for him and hug him close. “We’re so pathetic,” I mumble as I blink away my tears. “Seb and Corey are the ones who did wrong. They’re the ones who should be in pain. Not us.”

  Axle leans back. “What?”

  I look into his grey eyes. “They need to be brought to justice. If you testify—”

  “It won’t hold up in court. I’ve thought about it before. I wanted to come clean, but it happened ten years ago. Human memories are unreliable. And I was drunk. Seb’s lawyer would have a field day if I took the stand.”

  “We could exhume Diandre’s body.”

  “To do what? Even if we find evidence that he hit his head, it could be argued that he did that on his own. There’s no evidence that it was their fault.”

  I step back, massaging my temple. “Are you stalling because you don’t want to rat on your friends?”

  Axle looks hurt. “You know that’s not true.”

  “We have to try something!”

  “And I’m willing to do whatever it takes, but we have to be smart about this. Seb is dangerous and he’s not above hurting you to keep you quiet. If we take this public, we need hard evidence that can’t be denied in court.”

  “What about a confession?”

  Axle tilts his head, mulling it over. After a while, he nods. “That could work. If we could get him to admit to it.”

  “You can do it, right?”

  “I can try, but if I randomly bring it up now, Seb will be suspicious. He’s smarter than he looks.” Axle rubs his chin. “What about Kolby?”

  “No way.” I shake my head. “I’m not putting your brother in danger over this. If he gets hurt because of me, I would never forgive myself.”

  “But Kolby’s already a part of this. He overheard us talking in the kitchen. He’s suspicious of me and of what happened with Diandre. If he goes to Seb with evidence, he might be able to threaten him into a confession.”

  I whirl away from him and stalk to the other side of the room before pacing back. The desire for vengeance burns like a fire. I want it so badly that I almost consider Axle’s proposal, but in the end, I can’t do it.

  “It’s too dangerous. Kolby’s just a kid.”

  “But—”

  “I said no.”

  “Alright.” Axle sighs. “Then what do we do?”

  “I don’t know.” I chew a fingernail. “Have any other ideas?”

  “Not right now.”

  I sink into the sofa and tip my head back. “Something will come. We just have to wait.” When there’s no reply, I glance up and find Axle standing awkwardly by the door. I pat the sofa next to me. “Come here.”

  He hesitates.

  I stare at him and smack the couch more intently. Axle strides over to me and sits on the edge of the cushion. I flip on my back and rest my head in his lap, closing my eyes and pretending his leg is comfortable when it’s really just firm muscle that’s harder than a rock.

  Axle stiffens up which doesn’t make me any more comfortable.

  “What are you doing?” he rasps.

  “This is your punishment.” I open my eyes and find him staring down at me, confusion stamped across his face. I reach up and brush my fingers on his bristly cheek. Then I take his hand and gesture to it. “I’m chaining you to me.
No more running.”

  His expression softens for the first time since he burst into the condo with his heart burning and his eyes aflame. “No more running.”

  “You promise?”

  “Yes. And I’ll keep this one.”

  I smile sadly.

  “Thank you,” he whispers.

  “For what?”

  He looks away. “I don’t deserve to be here, holding you.”

  I adjust my head on his lap so his gaze returns to my face. “Thank you for coming back to me. For telling me the truth.”

  He rubs his thumb on my forehead, following my hairline. “Thank you for taking me back.”

  “It’s your own fault for being such a good man and making me fall for you.” I narrow my eyes. “Since I don’t expect it to happen again, I’ll let the fact that you ignored my messages slide.”

  He chuckles.

  I slap his arm. “You’re laughing right now?”

  “You were very determined, you know that? Made it very hard on me.”

  “Excuse me?” I gasp. “I was desperate. The guy I liked just fell off the face of the earth. What was I supposed to do?” I swat at him again as a chuckle rolls out of my mouth. “Stop laughing.”

  He pulls his lips in, but I can tell that he’s hiding a smile. “I almost answered you a dozen times. There were moments I typed out a message before I realized what I was doing. It got so bad I had to take the battery out of my phone and use the one at work to communicate.”

  “You’re kidding?”

  “Nope.” His gaze turns tender. “I missed you.”

  I take his hand and kiss his palm. “I missed you more.”

  “What did you miss so much?” he asks mischievously.

  “Are you fishing for compliments right now?”

  “It’s an honest question.”

  I mull it over. “I don’t know. Everything. I missed talking to you. Hugging you. Watching your face.” I reach up and touch his jaw. “If you didn’t know, you’re very handsome.”

  “And you’re beautiful. Inside and out.” He plays with a curl and I’m content with the silence. After a while, Axle asks, “What would you have done if I hadn’t come?”

  “I don’t know. That wasn’t an option for me. I just… knew you’d be here eventually.”

  “How long would you have waited?”

  “As long as you needed.”

  He shakes his head slowly and whispers in awe, “Man, I don’t deserve you.”

  The admiration in Axle’s eyes is enough to set a fire in my stomach. I chuckle nervously to hide how affected I am. There’s no way I want a repeat of the night I got drunk and was rebuffed by him.

  “Yeah, I’m pretty awesome,” I say nervously. “Don’t forget it.”

  He doesn’t respond to my words, instead his expression grows more serious.

  I sit up and fix my hair. “What? Why are you staring at me like that?”

  “Because you’re beautiful.”

  My heart freezes… and then beats with the energy of a jackhammer. Excitement skitters through my nerves. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

  He smiles. “I know.”

  “You know?” I arch an eyebrow at his arrogance.

  “I know you’re choosing to believe in me, to stand by me. I see it and I’m humbled by it.” He scoots closer to me. “I want to spend the rest of my life making it up to you. Showing you that you made the right choice.”

  I put a hand to his chest and grin. “Is this a proposal?”

  “Very funny.” He leans closer.

  I close the distance and meet his lips. It’s a tender kiss. A reunion kiss. I’ve always melted at Axle’s gentleness but there’s an added layer of warmth because of everything we’ve been through.

  As he cups my cheeks and tilts my head for better access, I tremble beneath the weight of his touch. He treasures me. I feel it with every brush of his lips against mine, every stroke of his hand on my face, my shoulders, my side.

  And for a moment, warning bells clang and I stiffen.

  There’s no coming back from this man.

  If I fall completely, I will never be able to recover. Axle will own every inch of my heart and if he breaks it, I don’t know how I’ll put it back together again.

  Axle senses my fear. He grunts and kisses me slowly, assuring me with his caress. Promising that what I fear won’t come true.

  When he pulls back, I’m slightly dazed.

  He pulls me in and nuzzles my ear, biting it gently. “I want you.”

  A shiver of need travels down my spine, but I push him away. “I can’t.”

  “Why not?”

  “Aunt B hates your guts now so we should probably explain everything to her first before she finds us in a… compromising position on her couch.”

  Axle winces. “You think she’ll be as forgiving as you were?”

  “Mm… probably not.”

  He groans. “I knew it.”

  “When it’s about someone you love, you tend to hold grudges.”

  He presses a quick kiss to my temple. “Which is interesting. When it’s someone you love, you tend to lose all your defenses.”

  “That’s true… oh.” The moan escapes without my permission as Axle’s mouth gets to work on my neck and I start wondering what the big deal of Aunt B walking in on us is. Then a thought strikes and I shove Axle. Hard.

  He flies off the couch with a grunt.

  “Sorry!” I squeal, jumping to my feet. “Maribella!”

  Axle gets up, his face creased in pain. He rubs his back. “What?”

  My eyes glitter. “‘When you love someone, you lose all your defenses’. Seb loves Maribella. He wouldn’t suspect her if she came to him asking about that night.”

  “We use Maribella to get Seb’s confession,” Axle says slowly. “Do you think it’ll work?”

  I shrug. “Only one way to find out.”

  25

  Axle

  The bar is slightly less smoky in the middle of the day. There’s no one on the dance floor, mostly because the bluesy song croaking from the speakers inspires tears rather than body movement.

  I sink into one of the booths instead of heading to the bar like I did the night Seb told me Diandre and Ember were related.

  There’s another man seated around the bar this time. He’s dressed in a rumpled white shirt and black slacks. His shoulders are hunched over the mug that he sips liberally. I watch him from across the way, wondering if I looked that pathetic.

  I probably did.

  In my wildest dreams, I never considered that Ember would forgive me. I didn’t think I deserved it. I still don’t, but she’s an incredible woman. For the rest of my life, I’ll make sure she never regrets her decision.

  High heels clack in the distance, jarring me from my thoughts. I glance up and notice Maribella striding toward me. She’s dressed in a blouse that dips low over her chest. Tight black jeans hug her legs. Her red heels clip the floor with every step.

  “Hey,” she says, swinging smoothly into the booth. Her lips are stained red and something dark rings her eyes.

  “Hi. Did you have an appointment before this?”

  “No.” She fluffs her hair. “I just threw on a little something when you called me.”

  I give her another once-over. “O…kay.” I fold my hands on the table and lean forward. “Like I told you on the phone, there’s something I’d like to discuss with you. And then I… have a favor to ask.”

  “Anything,” Maribella says.

  I wince at her eagerness.

  After I called Maribella this morning, Ember told me she wouldn’t be a part of the meeting. When I asked why, she said Maribella would be more receptive if it was just the two of us.

  I argued, of course. I wanted Ember with me so she could explain her side of things and appeal to Maribella as a woman and as a sister. Man, was I wrong.

  I’m glad I only bet five bucks.

  “Go ahead, Axle,” she says,
fluttering thick lashes. “I’m listening.”

  I bow my head. “It’s about the night Diandre died…” I share everything with Maribella.

  When I’m done, she sits back, stunned. “Are you saying… Seb murdered him?”

  “I don’t think it was intentional but, yes. And he’s not apologizing for it.”

  She mulls it over and then leans forward. “What do you need me to do?”

  “We need a confession.”

  “We?”

  “I—I need a confession.” The words feel heavy on my lips and I shake my head. “No, that’s not entirely true. Ember’s been through so much. I want to do this for her.”

  Maribella studies me. “Is she the reason you were in here the night I ran into you?”

  “I’d just found out that she was Diandre’s sister. Seb was the one who told me.”

  “That disgusting bastard. How could he act like nothing happened?” She shudders. “It makes me sick.”

  “When I found out he was engaged to you and that he lived in the mansion where we met Diandre, I knew he wasn’t going down without a fight.”

  Maribella stares at the table and then nods. “A confession you said?”

  “Yes. We need him to admit to it so we have enough grounds to reopen the case.”

  “I’ll do it.”

  “It’s okay if you want to think about it a little more…”

  “I’ll do it.” Her eyes flash. “Not for Ember. Not for you either. I’ll do it for Diandre. If I hadn’t danced with him, Seb would never have done something so atrocious.”

  “I know a little something about guilt. Trust me. But it’s not your fault.” I stare intently at her. “I mean that.”

  “Yeah,” she whispers, but I can tell she doesn’t believe me.

  “One more thing.”

  “What is it?”

  “Be careful. I don’t know how Seb will respond if you bring this up. If you see him getting violent, get out of there.”

  “I’ll be fine.” She nods decisively. “I’ll talk to him. Tonight.”

  I blink in surprise. “So soon?”

  “I’d do it now but he’s tangled up in meetings all day.” She laughs darkly. “I can’t imagine what this will do to him and his fancy reputation.” She arches an eyebrow. “Is it terrible that I’m glad I have an excuse to break up with him?”